Chapter 23
The Edge of Desire
Julian had always been good at lying to himself. He’d told himself he could survive this; being trapped in Enzo’s world, patching up his men, living under his roof. He’d told himself he could keep his distance, that he could resist the pull of the man who had upended his life. But the truth was, he couldn’t. Not anymore.
It always started with the arguments. They were inevitable, really. Julian’s stubbornness clashed with Enzo’s need for control, and their fights were explosive, filled with sharp words and even sharper glances. But somewhere along the way, the arguments had changed. The tension between them had shifted, the anger giving way to something else, something hotter, darker, and impossible to ignore.
It was after one such argument, a few days after Marco’s death, that Julian finally admitted the truth to himself. They’d been in the library, Julian, furious over something Enzo had said, what, he wasn’t even sure himself, Enzo equally furious that Julian refused to listen. The air between them had been electric, their voices rising as they stood toe-to-toe, neither willing to back down.
“You don’t get to tell me what to do!” Julian had shouted; his hands clenched into fists at his sides. “I’m not here to follow your orders.”
Enzo’s eyes had darkened, his jaw tightening as he stepped closer, his presence overwhelming. “You’re here because I want it,” he’d said, his voice low and dangerous. “And if you think you can just ignore me, you’re wrong.”
Julian had glared at him, his chest heaving, but before he could respond, Enzo had closed the distance between them, his hands gripping Julian’s hair as he pulled him close.
The kiss had been hard and desperate, a clash of teeth and lips and raw, unfiltered emotion. Julian had tried to resist, tried to push him away, but the moment Enzo’s mouth claimed his, all rational thought had vanished.
Suddenly, the kiss turned different.. It wasn’t the desperate, hungry clash of teeth and lips that had defined their earlier encounter. This was slower, deeper, more deliberate. Enzo’s hands moved to cradle Julian’s face, his touch achingly tender as he tilted Julian’s head back, his lips moving against Julian’s with a quiet intensity that made his knees weak.
Julian’s hands trembled as they gripped Enzo’s shirt, his mind spinning while he tried to hold onto some semblance of control. But it was impossible. The way Enzo kissed him, like he was something precious, something worth savoring, left Julian breathless, his heart pounding in his chest.
Enzo’s tongue brushed against Julian’s lips, a silent request for entry, and Julian couldn’t stop himself from opening to him. The moment their tongues met, a shiver ran down Julian’s spine, his body responding to Enzo’s touch in ways he couldn’t control. Enzo’s hands slid down to Julian’s waist, pulling him closer until their bodies were pressed together, the heat between them almost unbearable.
Julian’s fingers tangled in Enzo’s hair, his grip tightening as the kiss deepened, the world around them fading into nothing. All he could feel was Enzo; the warmth of his body, the taste of his mouth, the way his hands roamed Julian’s back, pulling him closer, closer, until there was no space left between them.
It was too much. Not enough. Julian didn’t know anymore. All he knew was that he couldn’t stop. Didn’t want to stop. The fear, the doubt, the voice in the back of his mind screaming that this was a mistake; it all faded away, replaced by the overwhelming need to be closer, to feel more, to lose himself in the man who had turned his world upside down.
When Enzo finally pulled back, his breath ragged, his forehead resting against Julian’s, Julian felt like he’d been shattered and put back together all at once. His chest heaved, his mind reeling, and he couldn’t bring himself to open his eyes, afraid of what he might see in Enzo’s gaze.
“Julian,” Enzo murmured, his voice rough but soft, his thumb brushing against Julian’s cheek. “Look at me.”
Julian’s breath hitched, his eyes fluttering open to meet Enzo’s. The intensity in those dark eyes made his chest ache, the raw emotion there impossible to ignore.
“You are not going anywhere,” Enzo said, his voice steady but filled with something Julian couldn’t name. “Not unless I tell you to.”
Julian’s throat tightened, his hands still gripping Enzo’s shirt as if he were the only thing keeping him grounded. He wanted to say something, to tell Enzo to stop, to walk away, to let him go. But the words wouldn’t come. Because the truth was, he didn’t want Enzo to stop. He didn’t want him to let go.
???
In the days following, he told himself, time and time again, that his weakness for Enzo was a matter of survival. That the way his pulse raced when Enzo was near was nothing more than misplaced adrenaline. That the heat of their arguments, the tension crackling between them like a live wire, was simply the product of two men forced into the same space, unwilling to yield.
But lies could only hold for so long before the truth burned through them.
He wanted Enzo.
It was dangerous. It was reckless. It was inevitable.
Tonight was no different.
Julian stood in Enzo’s office, yet again arguing about Enzo’s request for him to quit. His arms were crossed, breathing hard. “You don’t own me.”
Enzo’s smirk was slow, deliberate. “I never said I did.”
“You act like it.”
Enzo stepped closer, and Julian hated the way his body reacted to the nearness, the way heat coiled low in his stomach. “Do I?”
Julian scoffed, even as his pulse hammered. “You’re insufferable.”
“And you’re lying to yourself.”
Enzo’s voice was low, velvet over steel, a challenge and a promise all in one. Julian hated how much he wanted to close the space between them. Hated how much he knew Enzo wanted it too.
The air between them was electric, charged with something more than anger, more than defiance. Julian knew if he let this go any further, there would be no turning back. But the problem was; he had already fallen too far.
The moment Enzo reached for him; Julian didn’t stop him. He should have. He should have shoved him away, walked out, pretended that this was still something he could control. Instead, he grabbed the front of Enzo’s shirt and dragged him down into a kiss that was all teeth and frustration and fire.
Enzo groaned into his mouth, hands gripping Julian’s waist, pressing him back against his desk. It was messy and desperate, months of tension snapping like a rubber band stretched too tight.
Enzo kissed like he fought; like he needed to win, like surrender was never an option. And still, Julian matched him, refusing to be overtaken, pushing back just as fiercely.
When they finally broke apart, Julian was breathless, lips tingling. Enzo stared at him; dark eyes filled with something Julian wasn’t ready to name.
“Say it,” Enzo murmured, thumb brushing against Julian’s lower lip.
Julian swallowed hard. “Say what?”
“That you want this.”
Julian’s chest rose and fell with uneven breaths. He knew the moment he admitted it; everything would change. But the truth was, it already had.
He met Enzo’s gaze, steady despite the storm raging inside him. “I want this.”
A slow, satisfied smile spread across Enzo’s face. “Good.”
Julian barely had time to react before Enzo lifted him onto the desk, pushing between his legs, their mouths colliding once more. This time, there was no hesitation. Hands roamed, gripping, pulling, learning. Julian gasped as Enzo’s fingers traced up his spine, setting every nerve ablaze.
Enzo’s lips left a scorching path down his throat, teeth scraping just enough to make Julian shudder. “You drive me insane,” Enzo muttered against his skin. “Do you know that?”
Julian’s breath hitched. “Right back at you.”
They moved together in a desperate rhythm, all restraint stripped away. Enzo was fire; unyielding, consuming, a force that Julian had no choice but to surrender to. And maybe, just maybe, he didn’t want to fight it anymore.
Enzo gripped the middle of Julian’s shirt and pulled, ripping it apart, the buttons flying to the ground like confetti. He dragged the shirt down to his wrists but left it there, effectively tying Julian’s hands.
“Fuck,” Julian groaned, as the man attacked his neck again, his chest, biting his nipple while his fingers played with the other.
His pants were the next to go, as Enzo pulled them off in a smooth movement that would have impressed Julian if he hadn’t been so lost in lust, desperate for Enzo’s touch.
“Please…” Julian begged, for what? He wasn’t even sure. All he knew was that he needed Enzo to touch him, fuck him, break him apart until there was nothing left.
“Yes… Beg… Beg for it… Beg for me…” Enzo growled before grabbing his hair and pulling him closer, kissing him so desperately as if trying to consume him entirely. Then he was suddenly gone and Julian’s eyes snapped open in confusion, only to all but roll back into his skull as they fell on Enzo.
His shirt was unbuttoned, his vast ink glistening from sweat and making Julian salivate at the sight, as he imagined himself licking every inch of the tattoos.
His hair was a mess, his eyes glowing as he stared at Julian, but the thing that took Julian’s breath away was the fact that he was kneeling.
He was on the ground between Julian’s legs, and the sight of the formidable Enzo Moretti, Mafia Boss who the entire city feared, in such a vulnerable position made Julian grateful that he was already sitting.
“Oh fuck!” Julian cursed as Enzo swallowed his cock all the way to the root. He was unrelenting, his pace both too slow and too fast, making Julian sob as he tried not to move, not wanting to hurt him.
“Suck.” Enzo suddenly said, his fingers pressing against Julian’s mouth, before he returned to trying to drive Julian insane with his tongue and mouth.
For once, Julian did as he was told, his lips parting and then quickly closing around the fingers. He sucked with abandon, with the same passion that Enzo was bestowing to his cock, his mouth salivating at the thought of them in opposite positions. Himself on his knees for Enzo.
After a moment, the fingers disappeared leaving him strangely hollow, but not for long as he felt one of them press gently but firmly against his ass.
“Fuck!” He cursed again as it breached him, the sensation foreign and yet familiar. He spread his legs further, desperate for more despite the slight pain at the intrusion.
The one finger was soon joined by another, then another, as Enzo stretched him, scissoring them. And then it happened, the pads of his fingers touched that little spot, and Julian howled.
He knew that he was too loud, that there were guards in front of the office that could and most certainly did hear him just then, but he couldn’t care less in that moment. He was lost in the sensation; in Enzo’s touch, in his mouth.
“Please…” he begged shamelessly, “Please…”
“Please what?” Enzo asked, his voice raspy due to his abused throat. He stood up, pressing his large body into him, his fingers still working while he nipped and sucked on Julan’s neck. “Please what Doctor?”
Julian whimpered, the mocking in Enzo’s voice making him even harder than he already was.
What was this man doing to him?
“Fuck me.”
Enzo growled, his mouth searing against Julian’s as he quickly unbuttoned his pants and took out his cock, not even bothering to get undressed before slamming into Julian.
“Jesus fucking Christ!” Julian moaned, his hands, still trapped by his shirt, slipping and losing purchase from the force of it.
Enzo pressed Julian down against the cool surface of the desk, his weight a grounding presence, his touch burning in its intensity, his pace unrelenting as he pounded into him with abandon.
There was nothing gentle about it; this was need, raw and demanding. But beneath it, Julian felt something else, something unspoken, something that terrified him more than any of this.
He let himself sink into it, into Enzo, into the fire between them that had been waiting to ignite for far too long.
And when they finally unraveled, tangled in each other, Julian knew with absolute certainty that there was no going back.