Chapter 16
Sixteen
AUGUST CURRENT DAY (FRIDAY)
I walk to The Dizzy Acorn alone. Warren just texted that his meeting with Peter ended, and he’ll be heading over soon, but I have a few things I’d like to say before he arrives. It took everything in me to not text Trent last night or today and ask what has been eating away at me.
When I get inside, Trent, Ali, and Sterling are all already there—Will’s parents got into town today so he’s spending the evening with them prior to the engagement party on Sunday—and I don’t reply when they say hi. I stomp right up to the table, look Trent directly in the eyes, and ask, “How long have you known?”
He looks up, face twisted in confusion at first until he sees the restrained anger in my shaking body and flushed cheeks, then some of the color drains from his face. His eyes widen and I know I’m not going to be happy with the answer.
“Known what?” Ali asks Sterling and he shrugs as they both look between us.
“How. Long,” I grit out, hands starting to shake so violently I ball them into fists and press them onto the table.
He sighs, looking like he already regrets the words he’s about to say. “I was with him when he bought it.”
My legs almost give out on me as I process the words. All my weight is resting on my fists and the table shakes like it might tip.
The ring. He was with Warren when he bought the engagement ring he never gave me. I wasn’t even asking about that part, but it still feels like a punch in the gut. He knew the whole time Warren wanted to marry me.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath, trying to keep my voice calm but the words come out through gritted teeth. “And the reason he broke up with me?”
I open my eyes to catch his flinch, and it makes it hurt more. He hoped I’d never find out about this because he knew I’d be mad—he knew he was wrong. “I called him the day after you called Ali crying about it.”
“The whole time,” I breathe the words, blinking back tears. “You knew the whole fucking time ?”
He nods slowly and my vision goes blurry. I don’t know if it’s because of the tears that burn behind my eyes or the hurt that rages within me because he kept this from me.
“I don’t understand.” My voice is so small. I’m so hurt—I’m not sure if I’m even looking at him anymore. “You watched me cry over him for over six years. You listened to me speculate about every horrible reason he could’ve done what he did. I was miserable, and the whole time you knew. You knew that every theory I came up with was wrong. You knew that he was miserable without me too.”
“He hurt you so bad,” he counters. “I thought I was protecting you from more hurt.”
“Don’t you understand that you did the same thing he did?” I keep talking before he cuts in. “You both had some fucked-up notion that you knew what was best for me, and by withholding information you took away my choice. You didn’t care what I wanted. If you did, you would’ve told me the truth, because what I wanted was Warren.”
“He was already gone. Would it have made a difference?”
“Of course it would have.” My voice raises and people at nearby tables glance over our way. “If I knew he still loved me, that he still wanted to be with me—if I knew that somewhere in his apartment in D.C. was a ring that was meant for my finger—I wouldn’t have cared that he told me not to get on that plane. I would’ve kicked down every fucking door in the whole fucking city until I found him.”
“Wait, what? ” Sterling says.
“Did you say ring ?” Ali’s eyes are wide as she looks between me and Trent. Then her face drops, and she focuses on Trent. “You knew?”
He hesitates before he slowly nods, and she looks back at me, conflicted.
“He’s going to be here soon,” I say. “I’m going to get some air.” I start to walk away but pause, remembering something else. “Oh, Sterling, is it okay if I bring Warren as my plus one to the party Sunday?”
“We’ll make room.” He smiles at me and reaches for my hand.
I grab it and squeeze. “Thank you.”
“Come on,” Ali says, linking her arm through mine. “Some fresh air sounds nice.”
She’s silent as we walk out of the door and turn left toward a non-crowded area of the brick wall. Nor does she say anything as I lean against the wall and suck in deep breaths, trying to calm down. Once my emotions are under control and my breathing settles, she finally speaks.
“I’m so sorry,” Ali says. “I didn’t know.”
“I know.” I give her a small smile. Even if she hated Warren with her whole heart—which she did after he hurt me like that—she would’ve told me if she knew. She would’ve given me the choice.
“He had a ring?” she asks, hesitantly.
“Still has, apparently.” I close my eyes and start breathing deep again. If I think about it too much, it’s overwhelming. The life I wanted was within my grasp, and it hurts too much to think about how much I lost. How much time we lost.
“He just told you all of this out of the blue?” she questions, and I understand her tone even though I don’t like it.
She wants to make sure he didn’t tell me this in an attempt to manipulate or sway my feelings. But I don’t think there’s a manipulative bone in his body. He told me because he wanted me to know the truth, because he thought I knew the truth, and when I said I wanted to go home, he let me leave. If I said I didn’t want to be together after that, he would’ve walked away no matter how much it would’ve hurt him.
“He thought I already knew—that Trent would have told me.” I sigh, and the concern fades from her expression. “Ali, I’m scared of how much I love him, of how quickly he’s become everything to me again.”
“Well, it sounds like you guys finally talked about what happened before, right?” she says, and I nod. The scary part is we haven’t talked about what happens now. We’re still in a very similar situation to the last time with a countdown till he leaves again. “Analise, the two of you had something so real, something that felt untouchable to everyone else. It only took a few seconds for anyone to realize that you guys were made for each other. I only hated him for hurting you. If he’s what you want, then go for it. Last time they took your choice away, but this time it’s completely up to you. You get to choose what’s best for you, you get to choose what you want.”
Always on my side, even when her boyfriend is the one my anger is directed at. I lucked out eight years ago when she was assigned to show me around.
“I love you, Ali.” I pull her into a hug.
Over her shoulder, I see Warren walking up the street and a smile immediately pops onto my face. I don’t need time to think about it—I know exactly what I want. I know exactly what I choose.
I choose him.
I just don’t know what that means yet.
His eyes pull together with concern when he gets close enough. “What’s wrong?” His hand reaches up to my cheek and his thumb brushes over my puffy eyes. When I don’t answer he turns to Ali.
“She got into it with Trent,” she answers, and his eyes widen in understanding, his mouth forming a little O .
I squeeze his arm. “We’ll be back in a minute.They’re at the usual table.”
He nods. “I’ll grab us some drinks.”
“That’d be great,” I say.
He leans in to kiss me so casually in front of Ali, my heart skips a beat.
“Thank you,” I whisper as he pulls away.
“For the kiss or the drink or for . . . earlier ?” His eyes are bright with mischief and desire.
A smile pulls at my lips. “Definitely the drink,” I tease. “I was only ever with you for the promotion money anyways.”
He laughs and kisses me again before heading in.
“Excuse me,” Ali says, gaping at me. “What the hell was that? And what happened earlier ?”
“Last night after we talked about everything, we kissed.” I sound like a schoolgirl talking about a crush who kissed her on the playground. “And after lunch today we played a three-on-three basketball game with people from both companies, and he came over after.”
“Oh my god,” she exclaims. “He hasn’t even been back a week and you’re already sleeping with him again.”
“That’s not the point,” I say as my cheeks turn red. She gives me a look that says that’s very much the point, but I ignore it. “He told me he still loves me, that he never stopped loving me.”
“Well, of course, he does,” she says and laughs when my eyebrows pull together in confusion. “He’d be an idiot not to, but good for him for finally stepping up.”
I sputter out a laugh. “Ali.”
“What?” She shrugs but her shoulders shake as she does. “He should’ve said something years ago.”
“You know what’s crazy,” I say, leaning back against the wall and looking up at the sky that’s still showing the last colors of the sunset before dusk hits. “If he had just asked me if I wanted to go to D.C. back then, or Trent told me how he felt, we could’ve had six years of living the life we dreamed of. We’d be married and probably have a couple of kids. We’d be doing everything we wanted to do, right now.”
She lets out a long breath. “True, but life would be so different if you did. You wouldn’t be living here right now. We wouldn’t be as close to each other, and we wouldn’t have nights like these.”
“I know.” I frown. I hadn’t thought much about how me leaving would’ve affected these friendships, but we’ve grown so much closer in the years since he left. I wouldn’t let us lose touch ever. “That part would suck, but we’d visit each other all the time. It’s not that far.”
“You really love him,” she says softly, and I nod, a light flush staining my cheeks.
“I really do.”
“I’m happy for you.” She smiles, reaching out to squeeze my hand. “And Trent will be hearing more from me tonight on this.”
“Don’t go too hard on him, the past can’t be changed now.” I sigh. I just needed to get my anger out, he doesn’t need to be punished further for it. “Besides I’ve forgiven Warren so I kind of have to forgive Trent—although, after I yelled at Warren he pinned me against a wall and kissed me until I couldn’t stand, so that helped with the forgiveness thing.”
“You two are worse than teenagers.” She shakes her head, but we both laugh.
I loop my arm through hers to head back inside.
There doesn’t appear to be any remaining tension when we get back to the table, but Trent looks like he’s avoiding my gaze. I try to let it go as I drop into the seat between Warren and Sterling and take a sip of the Blue Moon waiting for me.
“How is it being back after all this time?” Sterling asks Warren.
“I’ve missed this,” he replies, looking around at each of them. “It’s impossible to find friends better than you guys. It’s been a while since I’ve laughed this much.”
I don’t think I’m the only one that notices he doesn’t mention the town itself. He really does love Washington D.C.—that much is obvious.
“Did he tell you he got his ass kicked in basketball today?” I chime in and laugh when his eyes narrow at me.
“That was a foul and you know it.”
I shrug. “The refs didn’t call it.”
“We didn’t have any refs.” He crosses his arms, turning towards me.
“Peter didn’t call it a foul.”
“Peter was on your team. Of course he took the side that made him win.” He’s trying so hard, but the corners of his mouth are tugging up into a smile. “Jason would’ve been on my side.”
I bark out a laugh at that. “No one gives a shit what Jason says, and I’m pretty sure he wanted to see you lose more than he wanted to win so I doubt that too.”
His lips press together, and I turn back to the group with a smile. “Long story short, he lost.”
“Brave of you to try to fight her on this,” Sterling says with a laugh. “Have you forgotten that she could convince an innocent man he was guilty?”
That phrase got coined at Triniti when I started speaking up in meetings. People would always look over at me at the end of a presentation—if I was invited to it in the first place—because if I saw holes in an argument, I was going to bring them up.
“Have you forgotten that I’m a masochist?” Warren teases as he reaches over under the table and laces his fingers through mine. “You know I can’t resist a losing fight if it’s against her.”
I blush and lean into him, bumping my shoulder into his chest. He kisses my temple and squeezes my hand. There’s a collective groan from the rest of the table, but they all look happy for us too.
The newest wannabe DJ starts his set, and Ali stands when she realizes it’s worlds better than last week’s set. “Come on, we’re dancing tonight.”
Reluctantly, we all follow. Trent doesn’t have a choice but to dance with his girl—he’ll act like he doesn’t like it, but a smile never leaves his face, and his eyes never leave her. Sterling is missing his dance partner but has never had a problem taking on the dance floor alone. And Warren doesn’t let go of my hand, always up for an opportunity to hold me close.
As we’re dancing, my eyes keep drifting to the trivia rankings—to the sign with our team name on it. Something about it is pulling at my brain, something about it feels important. I think through the day, when we tied all through the preliminary round and then on the big final question, we got it right and won it a?—
Oh. My. God .
The final question. I stop dancing and just stare, hoping it’ll help me remember. I remember that it was about tax codes and conflict of interest, and parent companies. Fuck , what was the code number.
“Are you okay?” Warren asks, looking amused and I’m sure my face has twisted into one of my entertaining, concentration faces but I don’t care.
“I think I have an idea of how to keep both companies fully operational, legally,” I say.
He stops moving too. “Seriously? We’ve been looking all week and haven’t found anything.”
“I know,” I add. “I think we’ve been looking in the wrong places for the work around. How long did Peter give us to find something?”
“We’d have to present by Tuesday if you wanted to delay the layoffs,” he says.
Shit , that’s so little time to research, model, and pull together a presentation. And with being gone tomorrow, and the party Sunday . . .
“This is going to be tight,” I say.
“Let me know if there’s anything you need from me.”
“I’m starting to think you have a fetish for bossy women,” I tease.
“If I have a fetish for anything, it’s for you,” he mumbles against my lips before kissing me. “You have no idea how fucking sexy you are when you’re being a strong, powerful boss at work. It brings me to my knees every time—seeing your mind work as you shut down every counter proposal, the way the people around you look up to you like you’re a goddess. I don’t know how you haven’t taken over the world yet.”
I laugh. “Quit playing around.”
“I’m not,” he says, and he sounds serious. “Just take me as an example. You use that mind of yours to outwit me in most conversations, and I get turned on by your teasing comments. You boss me around and I can’t get enough of it, I live to hear those beautiful lips tell me what to do. I would kneel before you daily and worship you like the goddess you are. You’ve taken over my world.”
I bury my face in his chest to hide the dark red spreading across my face, but I hold him closer to me than he was before, and I hold him like that until it’s time to go.
“So, what’s the gang up to tomorrow?” Warren asks before we all part.
“We’ll be helping Sterling and Will finish setting up for the party on Sunday,” Ali says about her and Trent.
“Party?” He looks intrigued.
“Their engagement party is on Sunday,” I say, turning towards him. “I guess now’s as good a time as any to ask if you’d like to be my plus one.”
He smiles. “Of course! I can’t wait to meet Will.” But then he realizes something. “Are you not helping them set up tomorrow?” he asks me.
“No.” I shake my head. “Sterling and Will were kind enough to plan their party on Sunday because I have an errand to run tomorrow that will take all day.”
His face falls in disappointment and I can hear Ali’s repressed laughter as I add, “You’re more than welcome to come with me if you don’t have anywhere else you have to be.”
I wasn’t sure how to get him to come with me for this, but I’ve been looking for a way since we talked on Wednesday about how he hasn’t been to visit his mom in a while.
“There’s nowhere else I’d want to be.” He smiles, but he has no idea what he just got himself into.