CHAPTER SEVENTY-TWO #3
He stopped suddenly to wrap his arms around his stomach.
He let out another shout as pain ricocheted through him.
His face went bright red, and I stopped moving now to look at him closely.
His glassy eyes reddened as he looked at me.
The betrayal shone in him, along with startling fear.
Saliva spilled from his mouth. “You…bitch.”
I stared, startled, as he writhed in agony. It was a shocking way to go. I knew after a few moments, when he collapsed on his side, that he could no longer move. He let out a whining sound, reminding me of a dog’s cry. A sharp pain hit me at that, like…like I knew the sound of death very well.
Shakily, I crawled around him to get a better look at his face. His eyes found mine, and I could see the plea in the depths of them.
“You can’t talk?” I asked.
He let out a groan in response.
“It’s awful, isn’t it?” I went on sadly. “When you don’t have a voice. When…you’re in so much pain, and the person you trust and depend on won’t help you when you know they can.”
His eyes filled with tears. They slipped down his face.
I crawled closer, following the tracks the tears took.
Leaning closer to him, I ran my hand through his hair, my touch doting, and whispered, “I knew you would punish me when you found the pills. I knew it would be a punishment unlike any other, but…I also knew there was a pill inside that room, hidden beneath the baseboard. A pill you threatened to force-feed me during one of the dozens of times you fucked with me in there. You put that pill in my mouth, don’t you remember?
You smiled at me, like this.” I put on the same smile he did.
The one that reached from ear to ear. Oliver stared at my mouth, and another tear fell.
“And when you finally let go of my mouth, I spat that pill out. It bounced once before rolling to the wall and lodging beneath the loose edge of the baseboard. So absorbed in the fact that I’d hugged your legs, begging for forgiveness, you forgot all about it.
” I shook my head and said slowly, “But I never forgot it. For years, I knew where that pill was.”
He let out another groan and convulsed for a few moments.
Foam erupted from his mouth, but he remained breathing.
I continued to stroke him. “I promised myself I would use it to kill you one day, but you don’t understand what it took…
I almost gave up.” I stopped stroking him and moved away.
“It’s easy to make your cage look pretty and to stay inside it, following the rules.
I could have followed the rules to the end of my days, too. ”
I paused, considering my words carefully. “But if I’d followed the rules every time, I would have stayed silent and let Rowe go that summer. And just because I barely survived that punishment, it doesn’t change the fact that something like that might happen again.”
I thought of Rowe in my dream. Of him breaking into all those butterflies. The grief struck me deep. “I can’t let you hurt another soul again, Oliver.”
I stood up and stretched my arms wide, closing my eyes as I rolled my neck around, loosening the tight muscles there.
When I opened them, I left Oliver groaning on the ground and entered the cabin.
After finding his keys, I unlocked his car and searched for his leather bag.
I found it in the backseat, his phone buried in one of the deep pockets.
I turned it on and was immediately inundated with messages from coworkers asking his whereabouts and…
Your time has run out, Mr. Black. I’m going to tell everyone what you did.
I have proof. They’re going to know about the students whose work you stole and passed off as your own.
About my sister—the person you spoke to last before she allegedly killed herself.
Everyone is going to know you’re an impostor and a killer.
On weak legs, I dashed into the house and back to the deck outside. Oliver was still convulsing and making sounds. I ignored him as I set the phone down beside his plate, angling the screen so that it appeared he was staring at it as he ate his final meal.
Then I went back to him. I didn’t crouch or look at him yet. I looked up at the sky instead. “Don’t worry, Oliver. The pain will end soon. It will be over.”
When I looked down at him, he was writhing in pain. His eyes weren’t on me. He was already lost to the inevitable outcome that stretched before him. He was terrified. I’d never seen Oliver truly frightened before. It didn’t surprise me that he felt it now, and it was for himself.
“You’re going to die alone,” I told him.
“I’m going back inside and I’m going to wait.
Then I’m going to leave. I’m going to start my life again.
Without you. I’m going to have the best fucking life.
I’m going to live, and it won’t just be for myself.
I’m going to live for all the lives you cut short.
I’m going to live for June. Goodbye, Mr. Black. ”
His groans burst out of him. “Daisy…” It took enormous effort for him to speak. Even then, the word came out slurred. “P…l…eeeee…se.”
I shook my head down at him. “There is no mercy here. There is only you and Death. If it’s mercy you seek, ask Him for it.”