11
THEA
My head’s leaned back against the seat of Wes’ BMW. Red, orange, and yellow whip by in a blur. The trees look like they’re ablaze and it’s oddly reminiscent of what I feel inside—like my whole life is burning down before my eyes and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.
The thought brings up a wave of emotions. I need a distraction.
“Everything okay?” Wes asks, looking over at me briefly.
Does he know me that well or am I just really bad at hiding what I’m feeling?
I glance at him, giving him a smile. “Yeah, why?” I’m hoping my nonchalant attitude is convincing enough.
“I don’t know. You seem different lately. I know you’ve been through a lot—”
“We all have,” I interrupt, hoping that’s justification enough for any changes he’s noticed.
He nods. “Yeah, you’re right. But… are you okay? Like, really okay?”
I hate this conversation. I don’t want to lie to him. I don’t want him to make me lie to him by asking these questions. But the truth is off limits, so I have to walk a fine line. “It’s been tough.” It’s almost the same thing I’ve told Sutton, a half truth. “But I’m getting through it. We all are. Things will be good, eventually. It just takes time.” I prod, wanting to know if there’s something specific that’s making him ask me this. “Is there something I’m not doing that you need?”
Because usually that’s what it comes down to. Someone noticing when you’ve stopped meeting their needs and they panic. I wonder what it is that’s been different for him. I’ll correct it because I care for him and because I need to protect him as well as my secrets.
Between Cole’s visit last night and the threat he made against Cassie, and Detective Williams, who could pop up at any time, it feels like everything could come crumbling down at any point. Aside from my secrets, I’m worried about Sutton’s wellbeing, Cassie’s wedding, my deal with Damian, which lingers over my head, and Adrian.
He runs a hand through his messy hair. His pushed up sleeve lets me glimpse the ink covering his arm—the river surrounded by trees with mountains in the background. I can’t see the whole thing, but I’ve memorized it. I’ve memorized all of him, every detail, because I almost lost him once. I nearly lost all of them. So now, I take my time appreciating everything about Damian, Sutton, and Wes.
Wes hesitates. Maybe he thinks that it isn’t a big deal or he’s reading too much into things. I reach out and take his hand in mine so he knows he can talk to me.
“You haven’t been sleeping in my room as much,” he admits. “I mean, when everything first happened, you were in my room constantly. But now…” I can see the pain on his face. I wonder if he thinks I’m abandoning him in some way or pulling away from him. My sweet Wes. I’d never do that, not without a good reason. I have a good reason. That’s not an excuse, though. He needs me and I can do better.
“Hey,” I say, needing him to look at me for a moment. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. Thank you for telling me.” I smile sincerely. “I’ll be in your room more.”
The wave of relief that washes over him makes my heart stutter. This man has no idea how much he means to me. I love everything about him and I hope he knows that. I’d do anything for him. He may never know that, though.
“Can I ask you something?”
He looks over at me with a beaming smile. “Anything, blue eyes.”
Wes might’ve noticed that I’ve been off, however, I’ve noticed that he’s been off too. The constant notifications from his phone have me anxious, as much as I’ve tried to convince myself that I was making a big deal out of nothing. I told myself that it was his clients. But I don’t fully believe that no matter how much I try to persuade myself. I’ve been giving him some space, thinking maybe it was Adrian coming home and he needed time to adjust. Still, it’s been nagging at me and I can’t keep quiet anymore.
“I feel like you’ve been a bit distant lately. On your phone more, but I didn’t want to make a big deal. Are you okay?”
He smiles, assuring me, “Yeah. It’s just been a lot lately. I’m good, I promise.”
Something about his words feels familiar. It’s an echo of my voice and I wonder if we’re both battling demons that we’ll never talk about. I want to ask specifically about his phone, but that’s taking it too far. I don’t want to start an argument. It might not, however it always did with Gavin and that makes me keep my mouth shut.
I turn to look out the window, thankful the conversation is over and we’re both fine with not digging into what’s weighing each of us down. Then he surprises me.
“I heard your shower going late last night after you went to bed. I tried coming to check on you, but your door was locked.” Wes doesn’t ask a question. He leaves the statement hanging in the air, waiting for me to address it in whatever way I decide to take it.
It isn’t hard for me to come up with something. “Oh, I must have accidentally hit the lock when I went to bed last night. I couldn’t sleep and tried taking a shower to relax.” The lie comes easily. “I should’ve come to your room. I’m sure you could’ve helped tire me out.”
Wes’ usually sweet brown eyes slide over to me. There’s a devilish glint in them now as his mouth tugs up into a playful smirk. “Yeah?”
My gaze drops down as I bite my lip. “Mhm. Maybe we can make up for that now.” I twist in my seat and pull my hair up into a messy bun. Wes’ eyes widen.
Leaning over, I start kissing his neck—his pine and leather scent consuming me. My hand slips down his muscled chest, settling between his legs where I find him hard and ready for me. I groan against his skin, needing him desperately.
“Thea,” he moans. “You’re going to get us killed.”
My teeth graze his jaw. “Want me to stop?” I grip his cock through his shorts. “I can, if you want,” I say it innocently, knowing he doesn’t want that.
His breath comes out faster as I stroke him with my hand and alternate between licking and nipping at his neck and ear. “Tell me to stop, Wes.”
“You know I can’t,” his voice comes out strangled as he white knuckle grips the steering wheel, the red gems of his ring winking in the sunlight. I smile against his neck.
Pulling away, I use both hands to tug at his shorts, lowering them enough to let him spring free. Licking my lips, I dip my head into his lap. I get the faint smell of cigarette smoke from his clothes. It makes me roll my eyes. Adrian has to ruin everything.
I force myself to focus on Wes, gripping him by the base of his cock, I tease him.
I circle the tip of him, flicking my tongue over his sensitive flesh. He arches his hips up, showing me what he really wants. I pull away, looking up at him. I give him a warning with my eyes. He gets the message and relaxes.
Gathering the saliva in mouth, I spit it onto his dick and use my hand to spread it, making him slick.
“Oh fuck,” he groans, his eyes fixed on me.
I grin up at him before saying, “Eyes on the road.” He huffs but listens to me.
Taking him in my mouth, I push him in until he hits the back of my throat. He stretches me almost painfully, but I love it. It reminds me of how he stretches me out when he fucks me and the thought makes heat pool between my legs.
I work my mouth over him, using my hand to pump him at the same time. I feel the car swerve before he straightens the wheel out. The thought of stopping so that we don’t crash is momentary—I push it away and increase my suction and speed.
Wes tenses and I can tell he’s close.
“Fuck this,” he mutters.
Suddenly, the car is veering sharply and the smooth road turns bumpy. He drives a few seconds longer before slamming on the brakes. It all happens so fast that my mouth is still on him. I push myself off.
“What the hell was that?” I question angrily. Looking out the window, I see he’s pulled off the main road and parked between a couple of trees. We’re close enough that we can still see cars passing by, but they probably can’t see us very well. “Wes?” I repeat, frustrated.
He doesn’t answer. Instead, he cuts the engine, unbuckles his seat belt, and storms out of the car.
Fuck.
WESLEY
“Get out,” I growl at Thea through the inch of open window. I have half a mind to chase her through these damn woods, throw her to the ground, and fuck her brains out.
She sits up in her seat, eyeing me and trying to decipher what’s about to happen. Deep down she knows—Thea needs to trust those instincts.
When she doesn’t move, I open the door and yank her out. To an onlooker, this would look like a DV case waiting to happen, but she likes this side of me. And I love that she likes it.
“Wes,” she protests, pulling her arm back, but my grip’s too strong.
I bring her around to the back of the car before pushing her cheek to the warm metal of the trunk. She pushes up against it. Thea’s stronger these days, making the power struggle between us much more interesting.
“What are you doing?” She seethes. “Let me go.”
Pressing my chest against her back, I lean in close and whisper, “You need me so bad, blue eyes? Now you have me.” I push her back down with one hand and tug at her pants with the other. Beneath them, I see a lacy emerald thong I picked out for her after ruining another pair of her panties. Our deal. For every pair I destroy, I buy her ten more. I make a mental note to place another order tonight as my fingers tear into the delicate material. “I’m going to fuck you right here, so anyone passing by can see how desperate you are for me.”
“God, you’re so fucking full of yourself. You know that?”
I’m pulling my shorts down when she catches me off guard by pushing up hard and twisting around. Thea throws a punch into my gut, hard enough to make me double over, but not enough to let her get away. She tries to make a run for it. I’m too fast. My arm shoots out, catching her shirt and dragging her back.
Throwing her back down onto the trunk, I lay my forearm across her back, using my weight to keep her down. “I bet you’re soaking wet right now. Aren’t you? You love this shit. You love that I don’t treat you like some pretty little princess, huh?” The dig at Damian’s nickname for her really riles her up.
Thea’s thrashing around beneath me and even catches me with her nails across the arm holding her down. She’s only making my dick harder by putting up a fight.
“You’re an asshole,” she screeches.
I laugh roughly at her weak insult. “You’re about to get fucked by this asshole.” I kick her legs apart. With my free hand, I shove my hand between her thighs—just as I suspected, she’s dripping.
Pushing a finger inside of her, then a second when the first slides in so easily, I coat her with her wetness. I bring my fingers to my mouth, slipping them between my lips. I taste my sweet Thea and how needy she is for me.
I can’t wait any longer, not only because I’m horny but also because it’s fucking chilly out here and I need to warm up. Guiding my cock to her entrance, I push into her. She’s so fucking tight, but her body accepts me eagerly, like it always does. Moans replace her savage little grunts. That’s my girl.
Thea’s fighting ceases as I fuck her. Her mouth doesn’t stop, though. “You—You,” she struggles as I thrust into her.
“What, Thea?” I taunt, waiting for whatever insult she’s trying to get out.
I lift my forearm from her back, trusting that she’s going to give into this thing that she started. She pushes up onto her palms and I get ready to shove her back down, but she doesn’t try to run again.
She snarls in frustration, looking over her shoulder. “You must need a lesson in fucking me.” Her words make my rhythm stumble.
Thea uses it to her advantage and takes control. Pushing herself against me, she forces me to stabilize myself by grabbing her hips. She takes the opportunity to slide herself over my cock, burying me in her before pulling away. She wants to do the work. She wants to show me how she wants to be fucked right now. I’m curious, so I let her take the reins.
I watch her ass bounce against me as she speeds up, panting in pleasure. She had me close in the car, so this won’t take long. Reaching up beneath her shirt, I grab her tits roughly, rolling her nipples between my fingers harder than I should.
“Fuck, Wes.” I expect her to tell me to stop, yet she doesn’t. Instead, she picks up her pace. She’s close.
“That’s it, come for me.” I wrap an arm around the front of her, sliding my fingers over her clit. Swirling over that sensitive spot, I keep my rhythm steady as I read the signs her body’s giving off.
I’m trying to hold off. I want her to go first, but it’s so damn hard when she’s moving faster and faster over my cock. The feel of her body beneath me, the vanilla scent of her skin, the sounds coming from her perfect mouth… all of it’s too much. She’s so fucking perfect and I don’t know how I got so lucky to have this stunning woman by my side.
“I’m coming, Wes. Wes… Wes… Fuck. Wes,” she moans out my name repeatedly. Knowing she’s mine and she’s using me for her pleasure sends me over the edge. I pull her upwards, giving her one last thrust before I spill into her. Sinking my teeth into her shoulder, my grunts are muffled with a mouthful of her shirt and the skin under it.
We’re out of breath and in a post-come haze, delirious and raw. This is what I love about us. The wildness of our fucking and the euphoric afterglow.
I wrap both arms around Thea, holding her close and nuzzling my nose against her neck. The thud of her pulse is a beat that lulls me into tranquility as I focus on it slowing with each passing minute. She traces circles over my hand that’s pressed against her stomach. I want to stay like this for hours, but it’s not possible. We have a hike we’re supposed to be on right now.
Pulling up her pants, then my shorts, I turn Thea around to face me. “You know, you’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.” I cup her jaw and press a kiss to her soft lips.
She tilts her head and smiles. “And you’re one of the three most amazing guys I’ve ever met.” Thea chuckles, trying to make sure there’s no competition between my brothers and me.
I wink. “But I know I’m your favorite.”
She makes the motion of zipping her lips. We climb back into the car and head toward the trail we were en route to before our detour.
Thea quickly falls asleep for the rest of the drive, leaving me with my own thoughts, regretfully. I’ve had too much on my mind lately, all of us probably have.
I worry about her. I don’t think she’s recovered from Cole kidnapping her or learning the extent of his psychotic behavior. It doesn’t help that we don’t know if he’s alive or not. He could be anywhere. I wonder if that’s what’s weighing her down these days.
The news of Sutton’s parent’s divorce hit my brother pretty hard. He’s always been the one with a good home life when the rest of us were doled shitty families. I don’t know how to help him. I didn’t have a choice growing up, so it’s all I’ve ever known.
Then there’s Adrian. Having him home is great—I’ve missed him. We’re older now, so I’m not sure how much we’ll have in common since getting into trouble seemed to be what bonded us when we were younger.
He was wild back then, but I can’t blame him. Poor kid lost his mom young, fourteen I think, to cancer. That was a silent bond we had—the no mother club. Although, maybe it was worse for him. At least his mom wanted him and didn’t choose to leave of her own freewill. Mine, on the other hand… I push my thoughts in another direction.
Damian’s helping him with a tattooing career and getting his own shop. I guess that can be our new thing. I still have plenty of room for more tattoos.
As for my oldest brother, he’s been different lately—irritable and antsy. Not that those are completely new qualities, however, he usually keeps his mood pretty well stabilized. Maybe he’s just got too much on his plate. His insatiable need to take care of all of us is ridiculous. He needs to let go of some of that control and enjoy his life.
I have my own issues, although no one knows about that. It’s not like I don’t want to tell my brothers, but it’s a fragile situation right now and I don’t think they would react well. I need to figure out how to navigate this without anyone getting hurt.
After the meeting next week, I’ll have a better idea on how I should move forward. Until then, I’ll keep this to myself.
“Blue eyes, we’re here.” I gently wake Thea once we’re parked. “C’mon, we’re already running behind.”