Chapter 2 #3
He leaned in and kissed me softly, the tip of his tongue tracing the contour of my lips.
“The man I love is about to fuck me.” He breathed the words into my open mouth.
“And there is no way in hell it’s going to be anything less than spectacular, because it’s us, baby.
You and me. And I’ve been waiting for this for a long time.
” He reached for the lube and got up on his knees, turning to make sure I had a front row seat of him prepping himself.
I could scarcely breathe, my cock so hard it was painful.
Mads winked at me over his shoulder. “How’re you doing back there?”
I felt myself blushing, for fuck’s sake. I scuttled forward, removed his fingers from his arse, and replaced them with my own. “Like I said—” I crooked them, making him groan. “—you talk too much.”
He dropped his head to the cushion, leaving his arse in the air, and me, plenty of room to work. It didn’t take long until he was begging for a lot more than a couple of fingers. When all I did was chuckle, he grumbled, pulled himself free, and flipped onto his back with his legs spread.
Happy to take direction, I slicked my cock and wriggled between his knees.
“Hurry up,” he grumbled.
“Soon.” I silenced his whining with a kiss, marvelling at the softness of his lips and the miracle that this amazing man was all mine. I kissed him slowly, taking my time, revelling in his taste, and the fierceness of desire that never failed to light me up.
I traced a line of kisses down his chest and belly to his cock.
Then I swallowed him down, my fingers finding a home in his arse once again.
He moaned and thrust into my mouth, making me gag.
He didn’t apologise, didn’t pull out, didn’t hesitate to do it again.
I loved giving head and Mads knew it. The messier, the harder, the better it was for me.
But Mads was too close for me to take my time, and pretty soon he was hauling me up by my ears. “Act two, scene one,” he puffed. “Man puts dick in other man’s arse and goes for it.”
I laughed. “Are you comfortable this way?”
“Yes,” he whispered, eyes drunk with need. “I want to see your face when you’re inside me.”
He’d read my thoughts. I stuffed a cushion under his hips and nudged my cock against his hole.
He hooked a leg up over my hip, groaned, and dropped it again, grumbling, “Not as young as I used to be.”
I fought a grin. “Need some ibuprofen?”
He narrowed his eyes. “Shut your damn mouth.” He tried again, around my thighs this time, and with better luck. “Now, where were we?”
“Right about . . . here.” I pressed against his hole and breached the rim, feeling a pop as the tight ring of muscle gave way. I paused, watching his face, his teeth scraping over his bottom lip as his eyes rolled back in his head.
Mads was right. We weren’t as young as we used to be.
But my body craved his in a way that made little sense of age.
I hungered for the feel of his soft hands on my body.
The smooth touch of a man who’d spent his life working with books, caressing them, mending and gilding them, coaxing beauty from paper and leather the same way he’d coaxed it from my own broken heart.
Helping me not just to live again, but to love again. To find purpose and joy . . . with him.
“How you doing?” I checked.
He nodded with a grimace, breathing through the burn. “It’s been a minute, okay. Just keep going . . . slowly.”
I snorted and did as he said, the vice-like grip around my cock threatening to push me over the edge before I’d even bottomed out.
Almost there, I paused to give him a breather, but he took my arse in both hands and pulled me deeper, hotter, tighter.
Until everything around us disappeared, leaving just Mads and me and those few centimetres of electric connection where we became one.
Fully seated, I screwed my eyes shut and breathed through the urge to unload inside him there and then. Back in control, I opened them again to find Mads smiling up at me, his eyes wet with tears.
“You feel so good,” he murmured softly. “I didn’t know you’d feel this good.” His head fell back onto the cushion. “But I’m not gonna last long.”
“Thank fuck for that,” I said truthfully, pulling my dick almost all the way out before sliding it home again.
Mads arched up under me, gasping, “Oh . . . shit . . . fuuuuuck.” His face did a funny grimacy thing and he locked eyes with me. “Do that again.”
And so, I did. And again. And again. And again, until sweat beaded on my brow and his face flushed crimson.
“Lift up.” He wriggled a hand between us and grabbed his cock while I continued to drive into him. “God, yes. Yes!” Mads bit down on my shoulder, his body rocking with the force of my pummelling. I’d have bruises for fucking sure.
“Almost,” he warned. “Almost . . . argh . . . fuck . . . yes . . . argh!” He came on a loud shout, body rigid, head thrown back as he spilled between us, slicking our bellies.
Two more thrusts and I joined him, the orgasm ripping through my cock and groin, body stiff, arms trembling, as Mads kissed my throat, my face, anywhere he could reach as he rode me through the waves of pleasure.
Spent at last, I collapsed on his chest and we lay wrapped in each other’s arms, gasping for air as our bodies slowly tracked back to earth.
Seconds, minutes, hours later, Mads whispered in my ear, “I love you. I love you so fucking much.”
I turned my head and kissed his cheek. “I love you too. That was . . . amazing.”
He agreed, but there was a catch in his voice that made me pull up to study him. “What’s up?”
His face turned from red to beetroot. “That was a first for me.”
I frowned, not understanding.
An almost shy grin stole over his face. “I’ve never been fucked without a condom before. I mean, I know we’ve been doing it for a while, but that was . . . well—”
“It was me being fucked,” I finished for him. “I get it. It’s big, right? I remember my first time as well.” I couldn’t believe I hadn’t twigged earlier. “How do you feel?”
He thought about that. “It felt momentous, somehow. Like our relationship was real in an entirely different way. I guess I’m old school, or maybe just old, but I never considered taking PrEP when I was single.
Figured I’d wait until I had someone worth taking it for.
So, like I said. I’ve never been fucked without a condom. ”
I laid my lips on his, the briny taste of his perspiration lingering on my tongue. “Well, now you have.”
Mads locked eyes and smiled. “And now, I have.”
I held his gaze until he finally cupped my cheek and asked, “What’s going on in that big brain of yours?”
I swallowed around the ball of fear in my throat and declared, “I’ve decided. I’ll go with you to Nelson. I’ll talk with Chloe.”
Mads said nothing for a moment, then, “Are you sure?”
“No.” My choking laugh said it all. “I’m so fucking not sure. I’d rather burn the damn letter and pretend I never saw it.”
Mads’ thumb brushed over my cheekbone. “I know you would.”
I put my hand over his and held it in place. “But as long as you’re with me, I know I’ll be okay.”
Mads’ eyes filled and he pressed the softest of kisses to my lips. “Always, my love. Always.”