14. Grave robbing date goes wrong #2
Her eyebrows climb higher. “Lana Lynch.”
“Who?”
“Oh my god...” Shirley whispers, while James just shakes his head in disbelief.
I only ever met Gerald Pickett once, during my job interview. He’s a sixty-something man with limp, gray hair and a gold tooth. He reminded me of an eel, for some reason. Slimy and slippery.
“Lana Lynch, one of your clients?” Lana says. “You know, the people who pay your bills?”
“Are you calling to pay? Are the boys done with their extermination?”
She closes her eyes, trying to keep her calm. “No. We have a sort of a ghost problem here, and we need help. You see, my ancestor—”
He cuts her off. “Well, a ghost problem is exactly why I sent them. Tell them they won’t get paid for a half-arsed job.”
Lana snaps. “Listen here, you useless piece of shit. I won't—”
“Thank for you calling.” And he hangs up.
She blinks at the phone for a heartbeat. She tries to throw it through the kitchen, but I grab her hand before she can. “This... this... cunt!”
Shirley snorts. “Said like a true local.”
“All my money will go to you,” Lana says, pointing an almost threatening finger at James and me. “You’re the ones fighting ghosts to save this house. ExorSquad won’t touch a penny!”
James smiles and raises his hands in surrender. “Fine by me, boss.”
I nod when she turns to me. I don’t really care about keeping this job, it was never about the money. I wanted to learn more about ghosts, and learn I did.
“Great! Now let’s get to work and find out how to destroy this old bastard,” Lana says.
Half an hour later, we’re all seated around the kitchen table, deep in thoughts.
Shirley raises a finger. “So first we need to force this creepy ghost...”
“Agnes,” I provide.
“Agnes, to move on by finding her remains. And probably set them on fire or something. Then the monster that used to be Earl Lynch will be unleashed and we have to send him to hell, or wherever, before he can destroy the house and get us all killed.”
James shrugs. “Pretty much.”
She makes a face. “Great... yeah.. A typical Monday.”
“It’s Sunday,” Lana says.
Shirley groans.
“Do you know where your family mausoleum is?” James asks Lana.
“I think so, yeah. I inherited it with the house. I can get you the location today. It’s somewhere in the city. We also need to prepare to move the guests.”
Shirley looks up. “The guests?”
“We can’t have them in the house when we fight this thing. It’s too dangerous. We’ll have to relocate everyone until we can deal with this.”
“But that’s over eighty people.”
“I know,” she says grimly.
Relocating means losing days of income and probably bad reviews for the hostel. This will be a blow to the business. But she’s right. If it all comes to the worst, and the house crumbles... I shiver. Let’s not think about that.
“The cats have been restless all day,” she adds. “We’re arriving to a breaking point. Something needs to give, and we need to make sure it’s not the house.” She puts a hand on the table and looks at ceiling. As if answering her, the light above our heads flickers.
“We’ll make sure what gives is the damn bastard in the basement,” James says, a dangerous edge to his voice.
With him, I always feel like we’re unstoppable. He’s not just the muscle of this team, he’s the blood pumping in it’s heart.
“So that makes our second date in a cemetery. How romantic,” James says as he lands on the wet grass on the other side of the iron fence.
I stare at him through the rusty bars after throwing the ExorSquad bag over the fence, followed by an empty suitcase. “Da—date?” My heart skips a beat.
He laughs, gesturing for me to climb. “Sure. You and me, flirting by the graves. Be careful.”
I hoist myself up, avoiding the spikes of the fancy-looking fence.
He grabs me by the waist when I make it to the other side to help me land softly.
I’m a big, athletic guy, I can climb down easily, but the way he treats me like a princess is doing things to me.
And from the way he grins at me, he knows it.
My cock swells and I have to remind myself we’re in a place where dead people are buried.
“Were you flirting with me that first time we went out in the city?” I ask, face aflame.
“Ewan. I’ve been flirting with you since the first night at the hostel.”
“Oh.” Down boy, down, I think to my erection.
He kisses the tip of my nose and turns to survey the dark cemetery.
The grass is covered in yellow leaves and the trees rustle in the cold breeze.
On the horizon, Edinburgh castle rises above the fog, dark and ominous.
It’s three in the morning on a Monday and the streets are quiet.
We met a few ghosts on the way, but now that I am aware of my gift, one angry word from me sends them floating away.
James grabs the bag and his flashlight, while I carry the empty suitcase. Tonight we're both wearing our ExorSquad uniforms, even if I doubt we’re still employed. We didn’t feel like going grave robbing in our normal clothes.
Is it grave robbing if we steal the remains of a murder victim no one knows about?
“Come on. Let’s find this mausoleum. Typical Monday, right?” he jokes.
He offers me his hand, and I grab it gratefully. The cemeteries are the least haunted places in the city, but it doesn’t make them any less creepy in the dark.
He only turns on the flashlight when we near a mausoleum to read the name on it.
It take us fifteen minutes to find the one we’re looking for. It’s an impressive structure of white marble, covered in reddening vines.
I pull out the heavy brass key Lana gave us and insert it in the rusty lock.
I have to apply some force to open it, and the heavy door makes too much noise as it gives.
I step back, spooked by the darkness beyond, remembering the basement.
But I know the ghost of the remains we are looking for is haunting someplace else.
“You know, in the contract we signed with ExorSquad, they forbid us to disturb graves and burial sites,” I say sheepishly.
He aims the light beam at me, and I squint against the sudden brightness. “They do? Why?”
“The contract mentions cursed remains and serious spine injuries...”
“Wonderful.” James pushes in front of me, ever my protector.
“You know, you should really read your contracts before signing them.”