22. Fractured realities
twenty-two
Fractured realities
EWAN
Ithink I'm losing my mind. I'm seeing things that can't possibly be true. My loneliness must be gnawing at my sanity. I thought that I saw James for a moment. James and Pearl, the ragdoll cat from the hostel, through the fog between limbo and the outside reality.
But something happened to my body. I felt the pain recede for the first time in an eon, and now the monster is stuck with me in limbo. On this side, he is shapeless. A cloud of darkness raging against it's new confinement.
"Not so fun, being stuck here uh?" I tease him.
He roars, and I just laugh manically to piss him off further. Here he cannot hurt me. I have long since learned to shield my mind and close it off from him.
What's going on? I wonder again.
Time stretches, until one sudden moment, the monster breaks free of limbo. I almost regret his presence. It felt nice to have company, even from my tormentor. But then I realise that the walls of my mind prison are gone, and I can follow him to the light.
Fully going back to my body is a strange feeling. Pain is replaced by an overload of sensations. I can feel the rough floor on my back, the cold air on my sweaty skin, and the tingling in my sore limbs.
I blink away my confusion and find myself staring at a dark ceiling. A cave? No… Shadows dance on the walls, and I follow them to their owners. Three people are standing a little farther away. I squint, but I get distracted by the glowing eyes in the dark behind them. So many eyes.
Demons, I first think. But no… Those are cats. I love cats, I remember.
"Ewan," says a familiar voice, and my eyes snap up.
This voice…
James is standing over me. He looks different. His hair is longer and tied back in the way that he favours, half up, the back loose. There is a little tear tattooed on his right cheek, and the left has three scars. I've never seen someone so beautiful in my entire life, and I say it out loud.
James laughs. "And you look wretched, big guy. But nothing a few meals won't fix. You also really need a haircut and a good shave."
I feel myself blushing, out of all things. Old habits die hard.
Behind him, one of the two people lets out a sob halfway to a laugh. It's a woman. Two women, actually. Lana's hair is shorter now, cut in a wavy bob, and Shirley's is blue instead of purple.
If my mind is making them up, it sure has a lot of imagination. But it wouldn't be the first time I'm experiencing fractured realities.
One of the cats, Pearl, walks closer and meows.
Tears immediately rise to my eyes, unstoppable.
I want to bury my face in her fur. I can't remember the last time I felt the warmth of another living creature.
Probably James on that fateful night when we thought we could take on the monster in the basement.
To my surprise, James picks her up in his arms and kisses the top of her head. "Don't get too close. Be patient."
She meows again and headbutts his face.
That, out of everything, makes me doubt this reality. James, cuddling with a cat?
"Don't look so shocked," he says with a chuckle. "She grew on me. She was relentless in her affection."
"What—"
But I'm cut short by the monster taking over. I almost forgot he was here, lurking under my skin like a parasite. We are now sharing control over my body, and my skin feels too tight as we fight for dominance. My arms shake, and that's when I realise I'm chained to the floor.
What?
I look around wildly, back arching. This isn't a figment of my imagination. I'm back in the basement of Lynch Hostel, and I was captured. I'm lying at the centre of a circle carved in the concrete, and it's glowing faintly.
My eyes find James again, and I whisper his name. He has a pained look on his face.
"I know, love," he says. "We're going to save you. Just hang in there."
A fierce hope blooms in my chest. They came for me, I realise. My friends. My lover. They didn't forget me.
"Releeeeeaaaaaseee meeeee," the monster roars with my voice.
James crouches in front of us. "Release you? Sure. We'll release you back to hell where you belong." Then he looks at the others over his shoulder and adds, "Let's begin."