Chapter 34 The Moral Dilemma
Chapter Thirty-Four
The Moral Dilemma
Luther
Luther watched as Tristan stalked down the hallway towards his bedchamber.
The boy was up to something. His actions had been off since she was caught in his bedchambers.
It hadn’t officially been confirmed that the unwanted guest was the one and only Alexandria, but there was no one else it could have been.
The description matched, and her singular stealth ability left no doubt in his or his queen’s mind that it had been her.
The fact that she had shown up here clearly meant that she had defied his queen’s orders and sent her silly battalion on a ruse mission.
Vivian had been beyond furious. You did not defy her and live.
Alexandria had sealed her own death with her contempt, forcing Vivian to send the twins after her.
Though it wasn’t likely they succeeded. They were arrogant and incompetent fools.
Unfortunately, he was unable to send a scout to confirm.
This meant that they were once again putting their faith in the efficiency of his magical abilities.
If a pregnancy had not occurred, he would likely see an early grave as well.
They had questioned Tristan; however, he had locked his mouth and said little on the matter, denying the entire event, making some excuse about a scorned woman. Luther knew the little shit was lying but hadn’t been able to dredge up any proof yet, so he had been watching him in secret.
Tristan disappeared into his room, leaving Luther standing alone in the shadows. If he knew anything about Rivka’s whereabouts or the baby, he would catch him. Eventually, Tristan would slip and he’d be ready.
Tristan
The door closed and locked behind him. He didn’t know how many more days he could withstand; his guilt had grown incessantly. The court duties he used to breeze through became harder to stomach, the subtle changes showing just how much his mother was pushing him away.
He had tried his best to shove it off and make light of Alexandria’s visit, insinuating that it was just one of his local girls who refused to take no for an answer.
He’d claimed that he’d bedded her and she wanted more, but he knew he was shit at lying.
They must have seen through his excuses and denials.
The philandering image he portrayed was fraying at the edges.
He knew Luther suspected Alexandria, but he had no proof.
Between feeling eyes on him at all times of the day and the pressure of his guilt creeping through his blood, Tristan was emotionally drained.
Reaching under his mattress, he pulled out the tanned, worn satchel he couldn’t seem to get rid of.
He’d discarded the stale bread and extra clothing, burning it all in his fireplace but when he’d lifted the satchel to toss it in as well, Tristan couldn’t bring himself to do it.
He’d stuffed it under his mattress to deal with later.
A stupid risk, but at this point, what would it prove? Nothing, so he kept it.
The cloth was smooth but sturdy between his fingers. Alexandria, as annoying and irritating as she was, was steadfastly loyal and even Tristan could admit that she was a better person than he.
He had overheard his brothers’ bragging about killing her just that morning, had even seen Erik tossing a dark braid of hair around, the exact same shade as hers.
But there was no way they were capable of killing her.
Her fighting skills were unmatched. She would’ve left them to bleed out if they had so much as thought of trying to cross her.
Was Alexandria really dead? He couldn’t fathom someone like her falling at the hands of Erik and Jackson.
However, if the unlikely had occurred and Alexandria was truly dead…
his mind reeled, not capable of accepting that fate.
He had counted the days; time was moving closer.
If he believed Ellis, and by Fari he did, and Rivka did hold his child in her womb, the birth would be soon.
What kind of person…what kind of father did that make him?
Abandoning his child, and for what? Ever since the Treaty Ball, his conscience ate away at him, forcing him to face his mother’s control over every aspect of his life.
He had lived in denial of it all, lying to himself that it was all for the benefit of the province, that he needed to follow her rules and give in to her demands.
What a fool he had been, lying around all day drinking wine and catering to his pampered mother and brothers. Bile had risen in his throat after the events of the Treaty Ball, the truth of his mother fully exposed. There was no ignoring the evil she was at her core any longer.
Even more devastating was coming to the realization that he would never be anything more than his mother’s pawn, unless he took a chance on himself and his true ideals.
Alexandria had stood before him, anguish clear on her face, desperately demanding: “Where are they, Tristan? Please tell me that you know something!” Her voice rang clear in his mind.
The way she cared for her queen, the fact that she was willing to risk her own life to find her, spoke volumes to her character.
In his thirty-eight years, he hadn’t seen himself ever becoming a father until the desperate need in Alexandria’s voice had pierced his facade and broken through his carefully constructed walls.
He had missed his opportunity to answer her questions then, but he did have a good idea where they had gone.
He was fairly certain Ellis and Rivka would have gone to the Morrows.
Rivka would almost certainly stay hidden, as she wouldn’t risk the child's health or safety. She would gladly give her life before letting any harm come to the babe and though he wasn’t the man he desired to be just yet, he now knew he would undoubtedly be willing to do the same.
Somewhere in Daithan, the mother of his unborn child had given up everything she knew and loved in order to ensure their child’s safety. How could he not do the same?
But he would need to be careful; things were amiss in Rune, and he was no longer in his mother’s inner circle thanks to Luther’s suspicions.
Even more than that, there were rumors that his idiot brothers had been attacked while in Varon, not that he believed that for a moment.
That too, had Luther written all over it.
But why the falsity, and where had they truly been?
He grabbed his bag and shoved Alexandria’s satchel inside, followed closely by his own clothes.
His child would not grow up without a father, as he had for most of his life.
At six years old, Tristan hadn’t known what it meant when his mother told him that his father lay with the Gods now.
All he had known was that he missed him.
That feeling never waned, and he refused to force his child to endure the same pain.
He would leave. He had connections outside of his mother and Luther’s reach if need be.
If not, he would find a reason to take a trip on Rune business and get out before he became their next target.
His child’s life rested on his shoulders.
And Rivka’s. He wanted to think that his mother wouldn’t threaten the life of a child, but he wasn’t that naive.
The only thing protecting that child was the prospect of the throne, but only if it were a girl.
He didn’t want to consider the alternative, if he had a son, knowing how ruthless and conniving his mother truly could be.
She would go to great lengths to acquire what she desired, and that was a risk he wasn’t willing to take.
With his mind made up, Tristan spent the next couple of days making travel arrangements, paying close attention to where Luther and the twins were at all times. He used the building unrest over his brothers’ supposed attack to draw attention away from himself. Time was not on his side.