Chapter Thirty-Five
Bryce
Something was going on with Emma.
As Bryce carried in another load of lumber for the open shelving he was building in the extension, he caught her once more
staring into space, her features tight and troubled.
Even with her uneasy expression, he couldn’t seem to stop looking at her. From her purple-tipped hair to her piercings, to
her ink, Emma gave the appearance of a tough girl but he knew it was all an illusion, the masks she wore to hide the vulnerable
woman inside.
He found her breathtaking and wished he had a better ability with words so he could tell her so.
The bookstore was busy on this rainy day, filled with tourists and locals alike. Only one other employee was working today,
Maya Thompson, who grew up near him. She was about four or five years younger than Emma and worked for the bookstore when
she came back to town from college during the summer.
He wanted to ask Emma what was wrong but she seemed to go out of her way to avoid him, striking up conversations with Maya
or a customer whenever he tried to approach.
His opportunity to talk to her finally came after he had made a trip outside to his truck in order to grab a tool he had left
out there. When he came back inside, he found her standing in front of one of the bookcases he had redone, her mouth set and
her features in turmoil. She didn’t seem aware of him.
Maya, he saw, was speaking to the only customer currently in the store, so he decided he probably wouldn’t have a better chance to ask Emma what was wrong.
“Hey, Emma, could I steal you for a minute? I could use some advice about something.”
That seemed to jerk her back to awareness. With a wary look, she followed him into the extension.
“It’s looking so good in here. How much longer until you think you’ll be done? I’ve been on a wild ordering binge to fill
all the new shelves.”
“Close. Another two weeks, maybe?”
“Thank you for working so hard on it.” Her polite smile didn’t reach her eyes. “What did you need help with?”
“I wanted you to tell me what’s bothering you.”
She gazed up at him in surprise. She swallowed but looked quickly away. “Nothing. Everything’s fine.”
“Really? Because you’ve been distracted since I got here.”
She shook her head. “You’re imagining things. If that’s all, I need to get back to work.”
He couldn’t force her to tell him, he knew. Still, he wished she trusted him. “Okay. If you change your mind and want to talk,
I’m here.”
She studied him, then leaned back against the brick wall they had stripped, eyes closed with complete exhaustion.
“I didn’t sleep well last night. I’m a mess.”
He wanted to tell her she was beautiful, as always, but he sensed that wasn’t what she needed right now.
“What happened? Was the book group meeting a complete disaster?”
She hesitated then finally sighed. “The meeting itself was good. Andrew read from his new book and it was wonderful. I can’t wait to read it. Everything went great until . . . until my mother accidentally found out something I’ve been trying to keep from her.”
He waited for her to continue. When she didn’t, he frowned. “You can’t leave me hanging like that.”
“I don’t really want to talk about it.”
He nodded. “Okay. I’m sorry I pushed. None of my business. I don’t like to see you looking so distressed. Since you’re here,
would you help me measure again for these shelves? I want to be sure before I start cutting boards.”
He had absolutely no need for her help since he already had checked and double-checked, but he sensed she needed something
to distract her.
She obediently held the tape measure for him and he made a show of comparing the numbers on the tape to what he had already
recorded in his phone.
When they finished, she spoke in a low voice he almost couldn’t hear.
“The day we had the accident, I found my dad kissing someone who wasn’t my mom.”
Bryce’s chest ached at her tormented expression. She sounded as if she had carried the pain for a very long time.
“You knew but your mom didn’t?”
Emma shook her head. “I couldn’t tell her. Especially not after he died. It would have destroyed her.”
Bryce could only imagine how Emma must have struggled with the secret. He hadn’t known her father at all but from everything
he’d heard about Gary Lucas, the man was a saint. Everyone at Lucas Construction had nothing but wonderful things to say about
him. Pam especially couldn’t sing his praises enough.
Suddenly all the pieces fell into jarring place. “Is that why Pam quit today?” he asked, before he could think better of it.
Emma stared at him. “She what?”
He immediately wished he hadn’t said anything, in case he was dreadfully wrong. “That’s what I heard, anyway. One of the other
project managers texted me earlier today. He said she’s put in her two weeks’ notice but won’t be back in the office at all.
It seemed like it came out of the blue.”
“I had no idea! My mom didn’t tell me. But I haven’t really talked to her today, I guess. She was out on a jobsite all morning
and I’ve been here all afternoon.”
“Nobody was expecting it. But I guess if Pam was the one having an affair with your dad and your mom found out, it’s no wonder
she left.”
“I never said it was Pam,” she said, but both of them knew he was right, especially when she covered her face with her hands.
She didn’t cry but he could see her shoulders trembling and knew she was holding back a sob.
Aching for her, he reached out and pulled her into his arms. She resisted for only a second or two before she sagged against
him, her arms sliding around his waist.
“Catching my dad making out with another woman was the most horrible moment of my life. For about an hour, anyway, until the
truly most horrible moment of my life happened on the cliff road.”
“Oh, Emma. I’m sorry.”
“We were fighting about Pam when . . . when the accident happened. I told him he disgusted me. Those were the last things
I ever said to him. How much I despised him.”
Now she did sob, a small, strangled sound that hit him harder than full-blown weeping might have.
“I didn’t. I loved him. But I was so angry at him for a long time.”
“It’s understandable. It must have felt like a betrayal.”
He could certainly relate. When his father had left his mother, Bryce had wanted to kill the man.
“I could never tell my mom. She loved him so much. I knew it would have devastated her to find out he was cheating on her.”
“But she found out anyway.”
“Last night I was fighting with Pam about what happened that day. My mom overheard. You should have seen her. She looked like
she was the one who just crashed her car down a mountainside.”
“You should never have held it inside for so long.”
“What was I supposed to do? My dad was dead. What would have been the point in telling her? If he had lived, maybe they could
have worked through it. Maybe he never even would have had an affair with Pam. He claimed they had only kissed, nothing more.
Maybe that’s true. Maybe it never would have gone any further than that. We’ll never know, will we? Because I killed him.”
He pulled her back into his arms. “Hush. You did not. You were fifteen years old. You weren’t responsible for any of it. The
accident was exactly that. An accident.”
“An accident that might not have happened if I hadn’t been so self-righteous and self-absorbed.”
“You can’t know that. You’re lucky to be alive. I wish you could focus on that instead of your guilt that is completely misplaced.”
“I didn’t want to be,” she admitted. “For a long time, I thought it would have been better if I’d died instead of my dad.”
“I would have hated that.”
He remembered hearing about the accident when they were in school and how sick it had made him. Literally. He had puked up
his guts.
Of course, there was a good chance he’d been hungover at the time. That wasn’t an uncommon state for him back in high school when it was much easier to bury his feelings than try to deal with them.
Those habits had been tough to break. Even now, there were times he wanted to forget everything and get hammered down at the
Rusty Anchor.
He, of all people, knew how infidelity on the part of a loved one could rupture a person’s confidence and sense of self. His
mother never recovered from her pain and rejection at being abandoned by her husband, even though Bryce’s father had never
been any great prize.
He couldn’t really fault Emma for trying to spare her mother that kind of pain, especially when Rosie was already struggling
with the even more devastating grief of her husband’s death.
Knowing that she had carried the burden alone for a decade filled him with an almost unbearable tenderness.
“I would have really hated losing you, Em.” He pushed a loose strand of hair away from her delicate, fragile features and
leaned forward, the intoxicating scent of her washing through him.
“I’m glad you’re here. That we’re here together.”
Bryce leaned in slowly, his gaze fixed on hers.
Their breaths mingled for a heartbeat before he closed the distance, pressing his mouth to hers in a soft, heartfelt kiss.
Emma’s eyes fluttered closed as she seemed to sag against him, her hands sliding up to rest on his chest.
He cradled her face gently, his thumb caressing her cheek as their lips moved together. The world around them faded away,
leaving only the warmth of their connection.