13. Raven
What had I been thinking, welcoming Winter into my bed…again?
Doing so would not…would not…become a habit.
Such action went against the queen’s request, and more importantly, messed with my “don’t get involved” motto. Yet here I was, and oh how Winter’s touch filled a need…a desire, even. Dragging the cold from my blood and replacing it with a slushy, inviting warmth.
And no matter how much magic he pulled from me, more always waited to be inhaled by his savory extraction. As if the magic bubbled free from some hidden source within me.
His lips, his breath coasted along the curve of my neck and across my cheek. My body reacted of its own accord, arching into the exploration of his hands, opening unto his awaiting kiss. Wanting, begging for more, more, more.
Was the internal drive coming from me, Winter’s magic, or a combination of both?
Despite the ache I felt when his hand brushed along the curve of my ear, or glided up my thigh to my hip, I managed to keep the barrier of clothing between us and instead got lost in the wintery taste of him. Kiss after kiss…after long, delicious kiss.
We had been through a lot together in the short time we’d known each other. And, well, I liked him, took comfort in his presence. Definitely found him attractive…alluring.
But at the end of the day, he was a royal prince, and I was a reaper. Our worlds would never mix, and we would never be destined for anything long term.
Still, we could have this…for however long it lasted. I was happy, and rather lucky, to have him at my side while holed up in what could too easily become a gilded prison. One laced in ice, if not for his help. Help that lulled me to sleep.
A rather deep, dreamless sleep, considering the many things that plagued my thoughts―Aldine’s death, Chace’s situation, the Killian's nearby presence, my blood-sealed deal with the queen, and the expectation to discover the curse’s cure.
I awoke refreshed to the sound of a shuffle and a muffled cough.
Morning light cascaded through the balcony glass doors, and I was, once again, sprawled beside Winter in a tangle of limbs, my head resting against his chest. His even breaths were a metronome by which to set the tone of my day.
With his white hair, white lashes, and alabaster skin, it was as if I cuddled with a living statue.
A second muffled cough drew my gaze. Neive stood in the bedchamber doorway, her eyebrows raised. Two days in a row she’d found us this way. Thank the death gods―once again―no articles of clothing were missing from either my or Winter’s bodies.
I covered a yawn and pushed up onto my elbows. “This isn’t what it looks like.”
Or was it?
Was I allowing my sense of loneliness or overwhelming fear of failure in the task to get the better of me? Could Winter’s magic be influencing my choices? Or was I merely allowing myself to selfishly enjoy moments I knew I shouldn’t?
“I have no doubt, my lady.” Neive bent her knees in a courtesy and tipped her head. “Breakfast will be delivered within the hour. I shall draw your bath.”
She crossed the room and disappeared into the bathing chamber.
With a sigh, I shook Winter awake. He grumbled as I pulled him from the bed.
“It’s morning. You need to go.”
He moved slowly, less sluggish and more reluctant. “Trying to get rid of me so soon? I know you enjoyed our time together.”
“Stop it.” I shoved at his back, pushing him toward the receiving room. “What happened was helpful and necessary, but not―”
He spun and yanked me into his arms. Pressed his forehead against mine.
“My magic still grows inside of you. You’re like my own personal rechargeable power source.
But there is something new simmering inside of you.
Something I haven’t sensed before, and it feels dark and delicious and wholly dangerous.
We shall explore that something other again soon. ”
He nipped at my ear, pulled away, and turned to leave.
Raising his hand over his shoulder, he waved as he strode from the room and called over his shoulder, “Good morning, Neive.”
“So very Winter,” she mumbled.
I chose not to question the remark or the familiar use of his name but took her words to mean that witnessing this kind of behavior from the crown prince with neither new nor unexpected.
The following hour passed in a blur of daily prep―bathing, dressing in my reaper leathers, eating...or attempting to eat...breakfast―while my mind fixated on “dark” and “wholly dangerous.”
I sat at the table in the receiving room and pushed the remnants of my breakfast around the plate with my fork.
Lucas stood nearby, eyeing me expectantly.
He had traded watchguard shifts with Neive when he had arrived with my morning meal.
Since then, the awkward silence between us grew heavier with each passing moment.
“Good news.” He slapped his hands together in a loud clap, jolting me from my thoughts.
“At least, I think it’s good news. Today, you will be working beyond the palace walls in the great world beyond.
” His delivery included theatrical hand motions.
“I hear it’s important work, but that aside, I thought you might enjoy the short stretch of freedom. ”
With a nod, I scooped a forkful of scrambled eggs into my mouth. Having scoured the citadel endless times before becoming a royal guest, I was confident I knew what to expect. Plenty of normal citizens going about their day, with the occasional cluster of afflicted.
Maybe I would get lucky and come across a specter or two. The scrumptious, dark thing roiling inside of me hoped I found aggression and violence.
I blinked. Wait. Why am I hoping for violence?
And…double wait.
Lucas had said freedom as if to imply I was locked in a cage. Was I? Was that what the queen’s arrangement had done? Imprisoned me in some fashion?
Chace had asked me if I was trapped in a pretty cage, and I had replied with a “no,” but had my response been truthful? Maybe the situation was too new to tell, though I sincerely hoped that wasn’t the case.
And if it was, well, I would deal with that inconvenience soon enough.
“That is good news.” Hopefully.
I inclined my head to meet Lucas’s gaze and forced a smile to my lips. My mind shifted from freedom concerns to Winter’s words of simmering darkness and finally to the puzzle of his easy arrivals and departures. I was under the impression the queen had requested he be kept from my rooms.
“How does he do it?”
“Pardon me?” Lucas tilted his head and widened his eyes.
“Winter,” I clarified. “How does he get in my room so easily?”
“Ah. That.” Lucas turned and headed for the door.
“There are passageways connecting his apartment to all his assigned guest rooms. Easy peasy, you know. So that his playtime can be kept quiet. The palace is actually filled with hidden passages. They’re all over the place, really.
Far older than the current royal family.
Some of them are so old I’d be afraid to use them. ”
“What?” I pressed my lips together to keep my mouth from falling open. “He can just…” I shook my head. Redirected my thought. “Where is this secret passage…the entry into my room?”
Lucas shrugged.
“But—”
“Shh.” He placed a finger to his lips and opened the door to the outer hall and awaiting room guards. “We must hurry. Valen is expecting you.”
Ugh. Valen. Part of my deal with the queen.
I ran my tongue along my teeth, verifying they were clean of any clinging food particles, then wiped my hands with a napkin and rose from my seat. Tossing the napkin onto the plate, I followed Lucas from the room.
Countless hallways, oversized seating rooms, and staircases later, we stepped free of the palace structure.
“Will you be coming?” I asked.
He shook his head with a humored grin set to his lips. “I never step beyond the palace walls in any official capacity. You will be in Valen’s charge.” His gaze swung past the gathering of guards in the side yard. “Or, I suppose, a guard detail, should Valen find such accompaniment necessary.”
“Sounds like fun.” I chortled as I tracked Valen’s approach from a distant point in the yard.
Lucas smirked then fell into proper royal servant behavior and bowed.
“Give him hell, my lady,” he murmured. “And regarding the hidden entrance to your rooms, ask the prince to knock and await your approval. I’m quite sure he’ll abide.”
With that, Lucas spun on his heels and marched back into the palace.
I wished he were joining me on the daytime excursion. I might not know Lucas well, but I suspected that having the servant along for the jaunt would make Valen’s grating presence more tolerable.
Buckling on my resolve, I turned to face the approaching royal healer. A reap of a time awaited me with Valen in the citadel beyond.
I prayed to Thanatos that I could keep the new simmering darkness, the one that thrilled at the thought of violence, in check.
Several guards stood at Valen’s back, either to protect the royal healer from the people, or from me, possibly to even keep me from attempting an escape. So far, they’d basically been loitering about like unnecessary props in an ineffective show of power.
Valen grabbed my arm again, treating me like a child who required hands-on directions. I exercised all my self-control not to rip the scythe from my belt and slice him in two. That morning, more than ever, his presence incited my irritation. Even the guards pissed me off with their too-long stares.
That simmering darkness really wanted to come out and play, and I didn’t understand why or where it had come from. How had these feelings become a part of me?
“There. Try that one.” Valen pointed to an older afflicted male shuffling down a quiet alley. “Show me what it was you did the first time you healed an afflicted.”
I heaved a deep breath. “We already went over this. I have tried to recreate what was done time and time again to no avail.”