Chapter 11 #3
Tonka got up quickly and made his way to the door. He felt good about opening up to his friends, but he couldn’t wait to see Henley. He still didn’t fully understand his compulsion to be around her all the time, but he didn’t fight it either. She made him feel good. In general and about himself.
When he exited the conference room, he saw Henley and Ryan talking to Alaska.
The three women had gotten closer over the last couple of weeks, and Tonka was happy for Henley.
She’d admitted one night that she didn’t have a lot of friends, and while he didn’t know Ryan all that well, he liked and respected Alaska.
“Thanks again for helping me clean up the computer,” Alaska told Ryan as the other woman smiled at her. “I can’t believe all the websites Becky was visiting and all the cookies and tracking shit it ended up putting on the machine.”
Tonka recalled that Becky was their last administrative assistant, and just like the many people in the position before her, she hadn’t worked out. They’d all gotten lucky when Alaska took on the job.
Ryan nodded. “Of course. Now you know which folder all that stuff gets stored in, so you can empty it every now and then yourself.”
“Yup. We’re still on for shopping and lunch next week, right?” Alaska asked her.
“Absolutely. I’m off on Thursday and would love some girl time,” Ryan answered with a smile.
“I can’t wait,” Henley said. “I can’t remember the last time I had a girls’ night out.”
“Well, it’s more like a girls’ afternoon, but I’m okay with that,” Alaska said with a laugh.
“On that note, I need to get moving. I’ve got one more load of sheets and towels to fold, then I’m out of here,” Ryan told them.
“I thought Jess was on laundry duty today,” Alaska said with a frown.
“She was. But her husband is sick, so I took her shift and sent her home.” Ryan shrugged. “It’s not a big deal. See you guys tomorrow. Hey, Tonka,” she greeted with a smile as she walked past him toward the front door.
He came up beside Henley and put his arm around her waist, lowering his head to kiss her lightly.
“Hey,” she said, leaning into him. “The rest of the meeting go okay?”
“Yeah. I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop or anything, but Jasna’s got that theater camp next week, right?
You want me to pick her up on Thursday, so you can enjoy your afternoon off and don’t have to worry about cutting it short?
I can bring her back here so she won’t be alone with me in your apartment. ”
Out of the corner of his eye, Tonka saw Alaska stepping away from the desk to greet Brick, but all his attention was on Henley.
She frowned. “Why would I care if you guys were alone in my apartment?”
Tonka gave her a look. “Because I’m a guy and she’s your daughter.”
It took Henley a moment to understand what he was implying. To Tonka’s surprise, her brows furrowed and she looked mad. At him. Stepping out of his hold, she turned to him with her hands on her hips and asked, “Are you kidding me?”
“Um…no?” he said in confusion.
She frowned even harder for a moment, then grabbed his hand and towed him toward the door.
“Bye, Henley! Talk to you later!” Alaska called out.
“Definitely. I have to talk some sense into this idiot. I’ll tell you about it later!” Henley responded loudly without slowing her stomping march toward the exit.
Tonka had no idea what she was all riled up about, but he couldn’t keep the grin off his face. She was adorable when she was being all tough. While he was a little worried about what he’d done to irritate her, he already knew he’d do or say whatever was necessary to fix it.
She towed him all the way to the barn and the second they were inside, she turned on him. “Finn Matlick, why the hell wouldn’t I trust you with my daughter? Are you going to hurt her?”
“What? No!” he exclaimed.
“Are you going to do perverted things that’ll make me have to run you through with a sword?”
“No,” he repeated, trying not to laugh at that visual.
“Have you, or have you not, spent time alone with her in this barn?”
“I have, but that’s not the same.”
“Why?” she asked, with her hands on her hips.
“Because. We aren’t really alone.”
“So the other day, when she was here for three hours with you while you taught her how to tie proper knots, you weren’t alone?”
“We were, but guests could come in at any time when we were in the barn. Taking her to your house, where we’re really alone, behind closed doors…it’s different.”
Henley shook her head. “No, it’s not different.
Finn, I trust you with the most precious thing in my life—my daughter.
I see the way you look at some of the guests when they get too close to her.
If you could, you’d snatch her up and carry her away, simply to keep her safe.
No matter what demons might get in your head, you’re a good man.
You’ve made my life so much easier this summer, but more than that, you’ve made Jasna’s life richer simply by being in it. She adores you.”
“You need to stop talking,” Tonka said quietly.
But she didn’t. “I don’t trust easily, especially when it comes to my daughter. I’ve seen firsthand the bad things that can happen in life. But I would, with no hesitation, trust both my life and Jasna’s life to you.”
“Seriously, stop,” Tonka begged.
“No, I won’t stop. You need to know that whatever happened to you wasn’t because of something you failed to do.
If you could’ve stopped it, you would have.
Your hands must have been tied. I know that without fail—because you would’ve rained hellfire down on whatever asshole was hurting you and those you loved if you could’ve. ”
She couldn’t truly know how spot-on her comment was about his hands being tied, but Tonka couldn’t handle any more of her sweetness.
He stepped into her personal space and took her shoulders in his hands, backing her up until she hit the door of Melba’s stall.
The cow was out in the paddock at the moment, but Tonka didn’t even think about that.
All he could do was kiss her to make her stop talking.
She didn’t push him away. In fact, Henley grabbed hold of his shirt and took handfuls of the material in her fists and yanked him closer. Their kiss started out desperate and almost angry, but immediately morphed into a sensual, passionate embrace.
Tonka had never experienced this kind of immediate connection. She understood him on a level no one ever had. And the trust she had in him, when he didn’t have it in himself, was humbling and overwhelming.
Even though he wanted nothing more than to take her against the stall, Tonka was well aware of their surroundings. He’d never do anything to embarrass her—or Jasna, who could wander into the barn at any moment.
He pulled back, breathing hard, trying to find the will to let go. He had one hand tangled in her hair, holding her still for his kiss, and the other was on the small of her back, clutching her against him.
“Damn, Finn,” she said with a smile as she looked up at him.
“Sorry—” he began, but she shook her head.
“Oh no, you don’t get to be sorry about that,” she told him.
Her lips were wet and swollen and she looked as if she’d just been ravished. Tonka couldn’t help but love that look on her.
“As I was saying, if you want to pick up Jasna next week while I’m out with Alaska and Ryan, I’d be grateful.
If you want to take her to my apartment, that’s fine.
But I’m guessing she’d prefer to come here and hang out with you and your animals.
I can meet you back here and we’ll figure out dinner.
I can stop and grab something after my shopping trip, we can eat at the lodge, or we can go back to your cabin and make something.
I honestly don’t care. I just want to spend time with you. ”
She was being sweet again, and it took a moment for Tonka to feel as if he could talk without his voice cracking. “How about we play it by ear and I’ll text you and let you know what the plan is?”
“Perfect. When I drop Jasna off at camp, I’ll let them know you’re on the approved list to pick her up.”
Tonka blinked. He hadn’t even thought of that. There were so many little things he had no clue about when it came to raising a kid. “Okay,” he told her quietly.
“Finn?”
“Yeah?”
“It might take some time to sink in…but no matter what happened in your past, the man I’m looking at right now is pretty damn awesome.”
“I want to tell you,” he blurted. “I told the guys some of it this afternoon. I just… Be patient with me.”
A hand came up and palmed his cheek. “Take all the time you want. I’m not going anywhere.”
And as he’d thought before, that was one of the biggest reasons why she had him in the palm of her hand—literally and figuratively.
She wasn’t pushy. Didn’t insist he open up and spill all his secrets.
She took him exactly the way he was. And the reassurance that she wasn’t leaving only made him want to open up to her all the more.
Henley went up on her tiptoes and tugged on the back of his neck. He obliged and leaned down so she could reach him. She kissed him quickly and nodded. “Right, so now that we’ve settled the fact that I trust you, what do you want to do for dinner tonight?”
Tonka grinned. “I’ve got about two hours’ worth of stuff to do here since I took time off for the meeting.”
“No problem. I saw you had some ground beef in your fridge. You want me to make meatballs? Or we could have sliders?”
“Meatballs sound awesome,” Tonka said.
“Cool. I’ll see if I can find Jasna. She’s around here somewhere. I’ll get her to help me. That’ll give you space to get things done here without her tagging along.”
“I was going to have her go around and refill the bird feeders on the property with any guests who want to help,” Tonka said.
“Cool. I’ll tell her to come to your cabin when she’s done and she can help with the meatballs.”
“Sounds like a plan,” Tonka said.
Henley smiled at him and shook her head.
“What?” he asked.
“It’s just that if someone had told my ten-year-old self that I’d be this happy twenty-five years in the future, I would’ve told them there was no way. Take your time, Finn. I’ll text you when dinner’s close to being ready.”
Tonka nodded, as he couldn’t get any words past the lump in his throat. He watched as Henley walked away. She turned at the barn door, waved, then was gone once more.
How long he stood there, trying to get control of his emotions, Tonka wasn’t sure. But eventually he roused himself enough to get moving. The faster he got done here, the faster he could get home and spend time with Henley and Jasna.