Chapter 77 #2
“This confirms it,” James muttered. “This confirms Valentina really did kill you the first time.”
Priest Edes and both my knights sucked in startled breaths. I had no doubt I’d have to explain that tidbit to Priest Edes later, at the very least, but now was not the time.
“Because she’s in league with demons?”
“Yes. It would have been the surest way to ensure my defeat, and killing you would have given her joy. She hated how attached I was to you. It all makes perfect sense with this revelation, and I guess I was just in denial.” James shook his head, then pulled me in for a tight hug.
I think he needed a second of comfort, but a second was all he took before he stepped back.
He spoke over his shoulder as he headed for the hallway once more.
“Move, quickly. If she’s in bed with demons, Ascor can’t throw a fit about whatever we do next. Our priority is stopping her.”
There would likely be some political blowback still, but they had no leg to stand on, and I’d make sure they knew it.
I wished for a few days, weeks, to let James process and decompress, but sadly, he was right—we just didn’t have the time. What I could do was prevent the disaster from even happening, and then he’d have all the time in the world afterward. I’d make sure of it.
Turning, I gestured for Priest Edes to follow me. “I’ll need you as witness for the council session. Walk with me.”
“You will explain what he said?” Priest Edes begged even as he scrambled to my side.
“After, yes. We don’t have time right now. Send word to Lila. Tell her she’s out of time and I need that sealing spell as of yesterday.” Lifting my ring to my mouth, I called, “Helena?”
She answered after a moment, sounding somewhat breathless. “Edwin?”
“I need you here, now. There’s an emergency.”
And the fact that the word “emergency” didn’t sound urgent enough was, well, rather telling.
I did have hopes, though, that because we’d had a council meeting only this morning, people were still near enough to the palace to attend another. One way or another, we had to speed run this and send James out with the army as quickly as possible.
If we were fast enough, there was hope still.
The council meeting went as well as could be expected, with a vote to release the army.
In fact, it was an incredibly short session, only thirty minutes long, partially due to Priest Edes’s testimony.
I’d spent the last several hours with Helena and Royce, helping to prep all the soldiers with oil, supplies, and whatnot.
Lenville still had not sent word to me, which didn’t herald anything good.
I knew people up north were scrambling. James’s orders to vacate immediately had been issued, but it was a matter of getting the right help up to them in time.
James was fully aware of this, and he hadn’t been kidding when he’d said he would leave in less than five hours.
I knew he was used to moving quickly when the situation called for it.
I wasn’t. Still, I did my best to keep up with him.
Almost five hours later on the dot, he loaded us both into a carriage, everyone already on their way to the docks. We were in a closed carriage, and I knew why without asking—so we could say goodbye in privacy.
James had packed.
I had not.
The second the doors were closed, he hauled me in tightly.
I hugged him back just as fiercely, my eyes pricking with tears.
I hated this. Even hate wasn’t a strong enough word.
No part me of me wanted to separate from my husband, especially not to send him to war against an opponent who had killed him once already.
I absolutely did not like sending him off like this.
I wanted to say screw necessity, but the practical part of my nature didn’t allow for it.
James spoke against my shoulder, his words soft, a definite catch of strong emotion behind them. “Beloved. I hate leaving you here, but—”
“One of us has to stay. One king needs to be on the throne while the other wages war.”
It had to be James to go off to war. I was not a fighter. He may be the obvious choice, but we both still hated the reality.
“It’s that and…honestly, I can’t bring you to war with me. Not after what happened the first time. I can’t take the risk of something happening to you on the front lines.”
“I understand. I’ll be fine here, safe within the palace walls. You’ve no need to worry about me.”
“I’ll worry about you regardless—you know that, right?”
“I know.”
James might not ever fully overcome the trauma of losing me in his first life. There were still times he’d swoop in and hug me for a long moment, not saying a word. I knew he needed to reassure himself I was fine, that I was alive and still with him. Hopefully, those fears would abate with time.
“I love you.” I held on a little tighter. “I feel I don’t say those words enough.”
“You can mention it more often.” He settled more in my arms. “I love you. Safeguard yourself, first and foremost.”
“I will, I swear to you. Promise me the same.”
“I’ll come back to you in one piece. They won’t best me a second time.”
“I’m holding you to that.”
I felt as if I had a million things to say to him and not a single word was adequate to relay even part of them. Why were we so short on time? Why did we have to face this again? James had deliberately safeguarded against this very future and yet his hard work had been for naught.
The carriage pulled to a stop, and I knew we had arrived at the docks. Our moment was basically over and my chance to say anything was now past. Still, I lingered for a bit more.
I kissed him, intending it to be a gesture of love and affection.
It turned hungry, desperate, both of us wanting nothing more than to stay in this embrace.
To never separate. It physically pained me, knowing our time together had to end.
James had to go. I poured every bit of love and need into this kiss, to remind his heart I was with him, even if we were apart.
There was a discreet tap on the door.
“Your Majesty?” Sir Seymour called. “Everyone’s boarding.”
I gentled the kiss before withdrawing and shifting off his thighs. “I’ll send more troops and supplies after you. Do not doubt they are on your heels.”
He smiled sadly and nodded. “I know.”
“Lila’s promised me she and her team will have the spell fully translated by tomorrow morning. I’ll call you and tell it to you. Memorize that spell so well you can say it in your sleep,” I said. “Don’t just sit on the ship missing me.”
At this, he rolled his eyes. “How do you know me so well?”
“You’re predictable in this sense, dearest.”
One of us had to open the door and force James to go.
I did not trust James to be that person.
I drew in a breath, then made myself open the door, stepping out.
James let out a gusty, resigned sigh behind me as he came out as well.
I somehow felt bad about forcing the moment between us to close, but we really had no time. Every second counted in this situation.
It was late evening now, the sun slowly meandering toward the horizon, as the summer made for longer days.
I was thankful for that, because we needed all the daylight we could capture right now.
The docks bustled with people—soldiers quickly marching on, warhorses and such being loaded—but I could tell most of the ships were basically fully loaded, and we were part of the stragglers.
There were calls from the dockmen and officers, issuing orders or shouting out questions.
It was an organized bedlam, and few seemed to take any real notice of us.
The wind from the sea was strong, sharp—precisely what we needed now to carry James swiftly to Berengar.
I turned and gave him one more fierce hug before forcing myself back. “Travel safe, keep me updated, and for Vuheia’s sake, do not lose.”
“What do you take me for? I’ll win.” James bent to kiss me, and this kiss was ethereal, it was so gentle. Against my lips, he breathed, “Be safe, my love.”
“I will.”
James kissed me once more, then with vast reluctance in every gesture, he turned and headed for the ship.
I did see him pause, his course diverted because an antsy Titan didn’t want to board, but the second James took his lead rope, the horse was quite happy to follow him.
Well, it was Titan’s first time on a boat.
In this life. Of course he’d be nervous about this big bathtub on the scary ocean.
I watched James go with fear knotting deep beneath my rib cage.
It felt wrong to send him off without going with him.
Still, I knew my place was here. If, gods forbid, James fell in battle, then it was up to me to lead this country.
I also would do no good on the front lines.
James would worry I would once again be killed, and it would destroy his focus in a crucial moment. I couldn’t risk it.
James was the last to board. The second he was on, the gangplank was retracted, and they cast off.
I watched the ship go for several moments, battling back tears.
I hated this. We’d never been separated since I’d met him in this life.
It felt like a detached limb was sailing away.
When had I become this dependent on him?
Dammit, no married couple should be forced apart like this so soon after their marriage. It made me hate Valentina and her cohorts even more. Hopefully James got revenge for me.
Sir Seymour cleared his throat from just behind me. “Your Majesty?”
“We can return.” I answered his unspoken question with a long sigh. “I’m just feeling sorry for myself.”
“To be fair, it’s hard letting any spouse go into war, much less a newlywed one.”
Yes, it was hard. Harder than I’d imagined. Still, the only thing I could do was make sure James had every ounce of support necessary to win the battle and come swiftly back to me.
In order for that to happen, I had work to do.
Really, work would help this feeling a little. I desperately needed a distraction.
Turning on my heel, I encouraged my knights to mount back up. “Let’s return. We’ve much to do.”