Chapter 11
Well, fuck.
I’m so totally shook that I just stare back at him, full tunnel vision, my jaw hanging. I huff shaky breath after shaky breath like I’ve just run a marathon.
The elf sheaths his blade. It doesn’t look like he ever had any intention of stabbing me. He was probably just sticking the damn thing in my face to make his statement more dramatic. (God, I’m learning to hate the fae!)
His sneer slides into pure amusement, and his eyes rake up and down my body.
“It sounded like you were having quite the dream, Alvin. Are you imagining all the things—or experiences—thirty thousand dollars can finally bring you?”
I follow his gaze and start to come back to myself.
I’m on my back on the bed, and it’s only been a few seconds, so my cock is still super hard.
Noticeably so. (Ugh!) But I’m surprised to find that it’s not standing at attention in the open air, but instead is tenting up the cheap, thin fabric of my jeans.
In fact, I’m still in all the clothing I was wearing before! And Collin isn’t on the bed with me. He’s standing against the far wall of the room, completely covered again with his own rustic shepherd-boy attire. He returns my gaze, contrite.
Exactly what the hell just happened between us?!
The elf cocks a derisive eyebrow. “Are you going to need a moment?”
I glare at him. Hell yes, I’m going to need a moment! Or more like the next full month to understand what’s really going on.
But the elf is for sure not going to give me that. I bring my knees to my chest, rolling up, and glance back over at Collin. Whatever it was we did, I have to get my shit together—and fast.
Collin, head down, continues to look over at me through his thick blond lashes, a little sad. But I see something else. Gratitude.
“I know you’re going to have to give me to the elf, and I want you to know that it’s okay.
He’s pure lethal, so this is the way it has to be.
I’m just glad I had enough time to… well, to get to know you.
” He raises his head a little and gives me a shy smile.
“I don’t get to make many happy memories of my own.
But being with you, like that, will always be one of my best.”
I look back at the elf, who has moved to put a small but expensive-looking burgundy leather case on the bed next to me. He presses a button, which makes the silver latches pop open with a loud snap. He then pulls up the lid.
Inside are three large stacks of hundred-dollar bills. Each one is wrapped with thick mustard-colored paper labeled “$10,000,” fresh from the bank.
“You can see I’m a man of my word, Alvin. Now all that’s left is for you to give me the watch and conclude our pact.”
I carefully slide to my left and drop my legs over the side of the mattress. It’s the side of the bed as far away as I can get from him. The side toward the double-hung window, the plastic shade still up from where I left it before work.
“And what makes you so sure I have it?” I ask, as cranky and sleepy-headed as I can make myself sound, but mostly just to give myself time to think.
I can feel the watch. It’s still in the back pocket of my jeans.
The elf snorts a superior chuckle. “Besides being a flawless judge of character and ability? My contacts let me know it had been taken from the house.” He then smiles at me, pleased.
Like he’s proud of me. “Despite your hesitation, I knew you were the right man for the job. And once this exchange is concluded, I will have more paid work for you. It will be quite useful to have an asset who fits so naturally… under the radar.”
I am pretty sure he just insulted me. Again. And I’m curious about who those contacts could be. But he’s not going to answer my questions. The moment I get to my feet, he extends his palm out.
“But enough about the future,” he says, coldly. “Alvin Alonso, give me what’s mine.”
I feel the skeletal fingers of the Obligation twist around my heart with icicle hardness.
It sends a thrum of tension along my arm, making it twitch.
My hand now wants to reach into my back pocket.
Involuntarily, I step forward, meeting him at the foot of my bed.
Standing so close to the elf, so close to closing the pact, the Obligation has moved from the brief, anxious, unpleasant discomfort I felt earlier to full-on compulsion.
I glance again at Collin. He nods back at me, a single head-tilt, eyes filled with gentle acceptance. He’s 100% ready for me to give him up to this fae—a monster who’s going to torture him, ceaselessly, mercilessly, to get whatever little evil thing he wants.
This boy knows me all too well. How my mom always talked me down, every chance she got.
How I don’t ever stand up for myself. How I fold under any kind of pressure, and retreat when things get to be too hard or intense.
That I recently came up with all these big-ass dreams of being some kind of paranormal white knight, but when push comes to shove, that’s all they will ever be: big dreams. Deep down, he knows I’m not someone who could ever be anyone’s hero.
Well, screw that.
“No,” I growl, and I keep my damn hand right where it is at my side. I don’t care how strong this fae warrior is. All I’m going to give Lord-of-the-Rings is a big old helping of kiss my ass!
The elf’s eyebrows raise with genuine surprise. “What do you mean, ‘no’?”
And whether it’s because of my direct refusal or because the elf is somehow actively tugging on his end of the Obligation, the compulsion surges down my arm like gasoline on fire.
It hurts, and more than that, underneath the pain is layered this thick, urgent desire to give the elf what he wants, to honor the pact, as I should.
It’s a desire that if I didn’t know better, I’d think was my own.
But I do know better. Growing up, my mother didn’t hesitate to use her succubus powers to manipulate me.
And before you reach for a barf bag or something, no, it was never sexual.
She was a nightmare, but she was still my mom.
Even so, well-fed succubi and incubi who know what they’re doing can generate all kinds of powerful emotions in others that feel real. That feel like it’s all you.
How many times did she make me blissfully happy about cleaning up after her, cooking for her, telling her again and again how wonderful she was?
How much despair, how much pure shame did she make me feel when I did the slightest thing to displease her, no matter how petty or ridiculous?
It never mattered how sure I’d been that she had been wrong, and that I was right to be angry with her.
She would just look at me, and it was like the world got turned upside-down, and suddenly I felt the opposite of whatever it was I’d felt before.
It took me a ridiculous number of years to figure out that she was actually using her powers on me.
That I wasn’t crazy. Or a bad child. Or only put here on this planet to earn her approval.
But eventually I did. I learned to sense when she was manipulating my emotions.
To block it. To push back so hard with anger and hatred that she would stagger back as if burnt.
I was never strong enough to actually yell at her, to tell her to go to hell, but it was enough to get her to stop, to get free.
And I do the same thing with the elf’s compulsion, not giving it an inch, creating an emotional chasm of pure fury between it and me.
“Alvin, what are you doing?” I hear Collin ask, deep concern in his voice. But I’m not looking over at him. I’m looking at the elf with fuck-you eyes. And he just stares back at me with shock. Because he knows that I should have succumbed to his power by now. And I’m not doing that.
“I refuse to give you the watch!” I snarl those words out with resolve, which makes the compulsion flare up hot inside me again. It sure doesn’t feel good, but it has even less effect than before, because I’ve got its number and I’m not answering its calls no more.
The elf swoops in on me, a hawk on a mouse, and grips my shoulders, his face twisted with fury. “How are you refusing the call of the pact? That shouldn’t be possible!”
Now it’s my turn to sneer. “Really? Maybe you’re not as flawless as you think you are, huh?”
“Alvin!” Collin cries out, rushing over. “This isn’t a game. If you don’t do what he wants, he’ll really hurt you!”
I turn my head and glare at Collin, holding tight onto my anger against the compulsion like a shield. “I’m not just handing you over, like you’re some thing! I won’t!”
Collin’s eyes widen, like I’ve just told him I’m going to commit suicide. Which maybe I did. I quickly glance around, looking for any weapon I could use against this fae warrior. But unless he’s especially vulnerable to a pillow fight, I’m straight out of luck.
“Who are you talking to?!” the elf roars. Then he steps back away from me, quickly releasing his grip, like I might be on fire. He regards me with amazement and horror. “Are you… are you speaking to the Avatar? But that’s impossible! You’re too weak!”
“You keep saying that,” I spit back at him. “But looks like there are more things in heaven and earth, doesn’t it, douchebag?”
(I’m actually legit proud that not only am I able to whip out a real comeback, but that, since he’s an elf, it’s also a Shakespeare reference!) (Because you know, elves were huge in Shakespeare?) (Whatever. Trust me. It’s totally badass.)
But Collin looks like he might be about to have a heart attack on my behalf. And it’s only made worse when the elf draws his sword again. The fae’s words drip with hate.
“Give the watch to me. Now.” His voice is a hiss.
And that’s when it hits me. A gut feeling that blooms into a full-on hunch. The elf has tried to bribe me. Threaten me. Grab at me. But that’s all he’s done. And if this is a God-tier artifact…
“You want it so bad? Then you’re going to have to take it. It’s in my back pocket.”
I wouldn’t have thought the elf’s glare could become more murderous, but I would have been wrong. Silence stretches between us as he seethes. But he doesn’t move. And even though I’m still totally screwed right now, I can’t help feeling a little triumph.
I glance over at Collin. “He can’t do it, can he? I need to hand the watch over voluntarily, don’t I?”
The blond boy next to me looks horrified.
“Jaysus, Alvin! Yes. You’re right. He can’t.
And if he kills you, he’ll never be able to use it.
” Now he grips my bicep with both of his hands, pleading with me.
“But he can still hurt you, as much as he wants, until you agree to hand over the watch. And, trust me, there are worse things than death!”
As if on cue, the elf follows my eyes to Collin and says, “I don’t know what the Avatar has promised you, but I am well familiar with the limits of all creatures.
I will cut you, and skin you, and take you apart piece by piece, for decades if I must. But you will get no release until you give me what’s mine! ”
I’m currently holding onto a lot of anger to keep the Obligation at bay. But I gotta hand it to him, the elf warrior sure knows how to sound truly terrifying when he wants to. Mostly because I have no doubt he will back up his threat.
My legs tremble involuntarily. But I’m not going to give in. I’m not!
I lock my knees in place and straighten my back.
“Do your worst,” I say, trying to sound tough.
A lot tougher than I am. But I refuse to be “weak-sauce” anymore!
Maybe it was the sex. Maybe it’s because this cute boy really needs me right now.
Or maybe I’m just tired of being pushed around, after experiencing it again and again for a whole freaking day.
But for once in my life, I am going to stand up to a bully, even if it’s the last thing I do.
This is who I want to be. So this is who I will be, for as long as I can.
Collin, meanwhile, is tearing at his hair, pacing around, all while looking up and off to the right, gaze flicking back and forth.
It’s like he’s desperately trying to track random birds speeding across the cracked plaster of my ceiling.
“Jaysus, Alvin! What are you doing?! Feck, feck, feck, feck, feck!” he cries out.
He’s also terrified, it seems. But he’s terrified for me.
The elf, very displeased, grips more tightly on the hilt of his sword.
“So be it,” he says.
Suddenly Collin practically shouts in my ear. “Shite! I’ve got it! Alvin, you need to run and jump through the window! Right now!”
There is only the one window in my bedroom. It looks out onto the street. Five floors down.
I react with what I’m sure is the biggest WTF expression on my face, but I don’t dare turn away from the elf and his goddamned sword. Still, my bizarre flinch seems to give the fae pause, and he lowers his weapon slightly and tilts his head to the side, scrutinizing me.
But Collin isn’t stopping for nothing. “Listen here, Alvin! You wouldn’t have gotten the same boost as with a flesh-and-blood person, and the sex we had wasn’t completed, but I absolutely shared life force with you and it still counts as feeding!
It won’t last long, but you should have active incubus powers!
You can easily handle the broken glass and the fall.
And I guarantee it’s the last thing he will ever expect you to do! ”
I experience a strange feeling of disorientation.
On the one hand, Collin just threw a whole lot of words at me super-fast, and I’m so freaked out, there’s no way I should have the mental bandwidth to process them.
On the other hand, it’s like everything he just said immediately makes total sense.
I’m able to absorb it all with deep understanding, and I just need to decide if I want to act on it or not.
The elf continues to stare at me, warily, watching my freaked-out reaction (or reactions, as I try to sort through all the confusion in my overheated brain), but he’s clearly not able to see or hear the Irish boy at all.
Instead, he pompously straightens his own back in what I’m sure he believes is a noble manner.
“So… I assume you are at last realizing the foolishness of your refusal and are now ready—”
Collin grips my arm again so hard, it hurts. “Alvin, it’s now or never! I need you to trust me. Leg it toward the window, screaming your head off, and just throw yourself as hard as you can through the glass!”
Uh-huh.
What he’s asking me to do is insane. Suicide. I’m not going to have access to any powers. I wasn’t feeding off him. (I’d have felt it, right?!)
But really… what the hell else am I going to do?
I spin to my left, launch myself full-throttle at my bedroom window, and scream my soon-to-be-bloody head off.
“AHHHHHHHHHH!”