Chapter 115
“ I will do whatever you recommend. This is my top priority right now,” I say on the phone with my concierge doctor. Sitting in my lounge at home, I sip a strong pour of whiskey and light a cigar. This is the worst day of my life.
“You’re already tackling the low-hanging fruit—exercise, meditation. Are you ready for what we discussed before? Adding cognitive behavioral therapy?”
“Yes.”
“They’ll probably suggest one or two days a week, but if you can manage three, that’s my recommendation.”
“What about medication?”
“After you’ve started therapy, the doctor will make their own recommendation.” He pauses, then adds, “I’m stating the obvious here, but you need to slow down at work. With your family history of heart attacks … you need to reduce your stress on every front.”
If only it were that easy to stop working.
Reflecting on the day, I can’t believe the trifecta of fucked I’ve caused: Dani, Eric, Lily. They all have reasons to hate me right now. I hate myself right now.
Do I even need to play this game anymore? I take a long puff of the cigar. Greg can run the show. He knows where the bodies are buried and who owes us favors. He proved he could do it without me this summer—the best summer of my life.
Dani. I understand why she texted him. It was immature.
She’s twenty-six, and nothing happened. I take a deep breath.
She’ll never forgive me. It will be a full-time job getting her to come around.
But I want it. I still love her. Dani is the one for me, and I’ll do whatever it takes to get her back.