9. Crystal
9
Crystal
It took me a while to fall asleep last night, but I slept like a baby. Rabbie’s spare room is cosy, I could hear the waves lapping against the shore in the distance. It’s a nice change from hearing my best friend’s orgasms. It’s been a while since I had one of those, and sleeping across the hall from an outrageously good-looking man isn’t helping my pent-up frustration.
I wake just before sunrise and change into my Lululemon leggings and hoodie, and slip on my running shoes. I’m meant to be meeting Dylan for a run later, but we don’t really run per se, it’s more like lightly jogging and catching up. I need to get a proper run in first and get the image of Rabbie naked out of my head.
I sneak out of my bedroom door, the flat is quiet. I don’t want to be loud in case Rabbie is still asleep. I gently close the door behind me to keep that damn hairball out of my room, and when I turn around, I collide with a soaking wet Rabbie. I step back in shock, partly because he scared me to death and because I can get a better look at him.
“Oh my god, you scared the shit out of me. I thought you’d still be asleep.” I clutch my chest.
He’s got a towel wrapped around his waist, and I get a full view of his long, muscular body. A deep V shape cuts into his hips, and a small trail of hair that starts from his belly button and disappears down under the towel.
Fuck, he’s cut.
A jolt of heat runs between my legs, and I bite down on my lip to control my impulses. What I would give to unwrap that towel from around his waist, and see what’s underneath. I bet I wouldn’t be disappointed.
“Sorry, I dinna mean to scare you. What are you doing up so early?” He runs a large hand through his wet blonde hair.
“I was going for a run before I started work for the day.”
I mean, it was hours before I had to start work, but I needed to let off some steam and a run is just what I needed. We stand there, both of us not knowing what to do or say next.
“I mean, I’m going to have run a hundred miles if you keep feeding me the way you do.” I joke in a self-deprecating way to break the awkward silence.
He steps in close to me, and I stop breathing.
“You’re allowed to enjoy food, mo beag . There’s nothing wrong with a bit of balance. Don’t put yourself down like that,” he bites his bottom lip.
I let out a shaky breath, because this man is something else. I try to keep my eyes from wandering over his godly body. He’s towering over, but in a good way. The rush from his sudden directness has me feeling weak at the knees.
“I-I’ve got to go, I’ll see you when I get back,” I stutter. I rush out the door before he can say bye to me.
The words ring loud in my head, I didn’t think he noticed my comments about my weight. I might seem confident to others, but I’ve always had low-self esteem when it comes to my body. Being from the south, I had the southern women in my family telling me you always need to look your best. My mama or meemaw were always on some low-carb diet or juicing fad.
The diet culture that my female elders projected onto me has unfortunately rubbed off on me. There’s always that self consciousness niggling away at me deep down. I’m trying to break old habits, and it’s taken me a long time to accept that it’s okay, not be perfect and put together all the time. That’s why I wear the short denim shorts, and heavier make up because it truly makes me happy.
I step out into the cold, crisp Scottish morning, and take in a deep breath. I start to run, away from the past, and away from the thoughts about what Rabbie just said. I start gaining some speed and momentum as I make my way through the town. It’s quiet at this time of morning, and I don’t see anyone as I make my way down the street towards the beach. The cold wind on my face is refreshing, and I push myself to run faster. My lungs are burning, and my legs are starting to ache. I stop when I get to the beach, and sit down on the sand to rest. With my frustration slightly suppressed, I have a moment to take it all in.
For a small town, it sure is surrounded by beautiful countryside. The beach is miles long, and stretches as far as the eye can see. Rolling green hills surround the rest of the town, making it look tiny. Castle Bogha’s ruins stand at the very top of the highest hill, people say it’s haunted if you believe in that folklore shit. If I didn’t like small towns, I’d go as far as to say it would be a nice place to live.
I can’t wait to get back to Boston, if I stay in places like this for too long it can feel suffocating. But Rabbie has been a good distraction from the mundane small town life. It would be a lot easier if he was fuck boy, then that way we could both have some fun before I go back to Boston. God, did I just run into him whilst he was practically naked?
I must’ve been sitting there for a while thinking about Rabbie, when Dylan startles me.
“How long have you been sitting here? I was shouting your name as I was walking towards you.”
“Not long,” I smiled up at her.
Dylan has a sceptical look on her face. I jump up and brush the sand from my leggings.
“Do you want to run or walk?” I hope she wants to walk.
I was pretty tired already from the first run, although it was a short run I haven’t exercised much since I left Boston, and the sleepless nights are finally catching up to me.
“We can walk, you look pretty tired. Are you doing okay?” Dylan looks at me with a slightly concerned face.
This is the reason why I love this girl so much, she knows me to a tee. Although she worries too much, she knows if I want to talk about something, I will. I don’t want to talk about what Rabbie just said to me, and I definitely don’t want to talk about my mama.
“Yeah I’m fine. Let’s walk.”
We start to walk along the beach, and I’m secretly grateful that we’re not running.
“So how was your first night at Rabbie’s?” Dylan asks, trying to sound nonchalant.
I know she wants all the details, but there’s nothing to tell.
“Yeah, it was nice. We had dinner and then went to bed,” I shrug.
“And what do you think of Edie?” She smirks.
Dylan knows I hate cats. But, I wasn’t going to give up my chance of staying at Rabbie’s because of a damn cat.
“I can tolerate that fluff ball if it stays away from me and my things.”
Dylan laughs hard at my hatred for cats.
“How are things going with the website?”
“It shouldn’t take me long, it should be completed before the holidays.”
“So you’ll go back to Tennessee for Thanksgiving and Christmas?”
Dylan is the only person who knows how much I don’t like going back to Tennessee. She knows that the holidays are a tense time for me because it’s the only time I go home.
“I’ll stay for Thanksgiving because that’s less time I have to spend in Tennessee. The website shouldn’t take me long to do, but I’ll stick around just for you. Plus, I won’t leave until I’ve fooled around with Rabbie a few times,” I wink, trying to make light of the conversation.
Dylan rolls her eyes at me, and I feel a small stab of shame. I don’t usually care about what other people think when it comes to my sex life, but Rabbie is so loved by everyone in this town, and he’s genuinely a sweet guy, that I feel guilty. Heck, I don’t know if he’s interested, but I’ll be damned if people make me feel ashamed for being attracted to the man.
“What is so wrong with having a little fun?”
“Nothing, I just don’t think Rabbie is that type of guy,” she shrugs her shoulders.
“You’ve mentioned this, but have you actually asked him about it?”
Dylan blinks at me, because we never really have heated conversations like this, but she’s treating Rabbie as some fragile thing that might break.
“Well, no, he never talks about stuff like that.”
“Then you don’t know what he wants in life, there’s no shame in casual hookups. I know it’s not your cup of tea.”
I don’t know how the conversation got here, but I’m feeling the stress from this time of year with the thought of visiting my family, and I don’t like the judgement I’m getting from my best friend.
Dylan stops, and I hate the look on her face, we never argue or have disagreements.
“Look, I don’t even know if he’s interested in me, but there’s no harm in a bit of innocent flirting.” I fold my arms and look out over the beach.
“Yeah, you’re right. I just care about you both so much, I’d hate for one of you to get hurt.”
“You worry too much. As long as you make your intentions clear, and it’s consensual, then no one will get hurt. Finding love isn’t for everyone, not everyone gets a happy ending like you and Cam.”
I don’t know why saying that made my stomach dip, I don’t want to be tied down in a mundane relationship with someone who I grow old and miserable with. It’s too close to my parents’ relationship, I’d rather be single forever than be in an unhappy marriage.
My parents have been married for a long time, and growing up in a loveless marriage was weird to see. I never saw either one of them raise their voices at each other, but then again I never saw any affection between them either. It was like they were just stuck with one another, and acted more like roommates than lovers. That’s why I’ve been single for so long, because that type of relationship sounds like hell to me.
I don’t like all this talking about relationships, and people’s feelings getting hurt. What happened to having fun, well I guess that’s what happens in small towns, nothing ever happens in them. I can’t wait to get back to Boston to the bars and restaurants, and my endless roster of casual hookups.
“You’re right, I’m sorry. I’ll back off.” She places her hand on my arm.
“Are we going to get together for Thanksgiving? I know the Scots don’t celebrate it, but thought it would be nice to at least be together.” I ask, changing the subject.
“Yeah, I was thinking of hosting a dinner at Thistle Down Farm, if Rosie is okay with me using her kitchen. We won’t all fit in the cottage.”
“You know I never turn down a good party, will everyone be there at thanksgiving?”
“Yep, the usual crew. It will be nice for us to get together. My Grannie Jo will love it, and I’ll invite Mrs MacNee too.”
“Sounds good, I know it’s not for a while, but I know being the little control freak that you are, you’ve started planning for this. I’m happy to help with the cooking.”
Dylan looks at me with a hesitant look, and she smirks at me. Dylan has had first-hand experience of my terrible cooking.
‘“I’ll let you peel potatoes, and that’s it.”
We both laugh, and I’m glad that conversation has turned light, we continue to walk back into town, the main street is more lively with some of the locals going about their mornings. People greet and wave at Dylan, and I dip my head and trudge along, letting her catch up to me every time she has to stop to say hello to a local.
“You can say hello to people you know,” she puffs as she catches up to me for the fifth time.
“I’d rather not, they all end up prying into your business anyway. All small towns are the same.”
“You’re so cynical,” she shakes her head at me.
I don’t say anything because she’s right, we stop outside Sweet Treats. I can see Nellie through the window, setting up before they open for the day. She smiles and waves at me, and I smile and wave back before I can realise what a hypocrite I am. Dylan spots Fiona across the road putting out fruit and veggies outside the shop.
“Hey, I’m going to go speak to Fiona. I’m sure you have to start work soon, but I’ll call you later,” she hugs me goodbye.
“See you later.”
I walk around to the back of the cafe, so I can head up to the flat to have a shower before I start work. The sweet aroma wafts from the back door, and my belly begins to rumble. I pop my head through the open back door, and find Rabbie listening to music while kneading out some dough on the stainless steel island.
His muscular forearms contort and tense as he stretches and works the dough. I watch on in admiration, he hasn’t noticed I’m standing there. He’s so focused and in the zone, it’s quite amazing to watch him work at his craft. He bites down on his lip in concentration, and the tingling sensation intensifies whenever I look at him. I step in so he knows my presence, I don’t want him to catch me creeping on him. I’m nervous he’s going to bring up what we spoke about earlier when I bumped into him outside the bathroom.
He spots me standing in the doorway, and a big, bright smile spreads across his face. Relief spreads through me and I let myself relax.
“How was your run?”
“Yeah, it was good. I was going to head up for a shower before I come down to work on my laptop. Unless, you want me to work up in the flat so you can have that table back? I’m not exactly a paying customer.”
He tilts his head to the side, and a frown forms between his eyes.
“Dinny be daft, you can work wherever you feel most comfortable.”
“Thanks, I’ll be back down in half an hour, boss.” I cringe at calling him boss, just like he called me roomie last night. I’ve thought about that a few times this morning. Was that him putting me in the friend zone?
A small smirk spreads on his lips, and fuck, I want to know what it feels like to kiss him.
“No rush. I left you some homemade granola in a bowl, the milk is in the fridge. I thought you’d be hungry after your run.”
“You’re too nice to me, Rabbie.”
His bright green eyes bore into me, and my stomach does that weird somersault whenever he looks at me like that.
“There’s no such thing as too nice.”
“I guess, you’re right. I’ll be back down soon,” I say, still glued to the spot.
It’s weird whenever we’re alone together, it’s like we don’t want to leave each other’s presence or know how to without taking our eyes off each other. I back up towards the stairs leading up to the flat, Rabbie eyes are still on me and my legs begin to wobble and shake from the intensity of his stare. He smiles softly at me, and then our intense moment is broken by Nellie shouting the first order of the day at Rabbie. He blinks and just like that the spell is broken.
I rush up the stairs, and into the flat. My heart thumps in my chest, and I have to take a deep breath to slow it down. How is he capable of making me feel this? I don’t get nervous around men. I’m always confident and self-assured when it comes to attractive men. But one look from Rabbie and I’m a totally different woman. I don’t like the way he makes me feel, it’s like he can truly see me. Like he can see behind all the walls I’ve put up around me over the years, and he sees the real Crystal,and that fucking petrifies me.
I make my way down the hall to my bedroom, when I notice the door is slightly ajar. I swear I closed it this morning, or maybe I was so distracted by a half naked Rabbie that I didn’t. I push open the door, to find that fucking hairball curled up on my bed, fast asleep. I grab the duvet and whip it up to shoo the thing off my bed, which is now covered in white cat hair. The cat screeches as it flies through the air, and lands softly on its feet near the door. It looks back at me, and scowls at me with its evil yellow eyes. I know that cat is going to have a vendetta against me.
“Shoo!”
The fluffball hisses at me before it wanders off down the hall. I have a feeling that won’t be the end of our little feud.
The bathroom in Rabbie’s flat is small, I can’t help myself when it comes to snooping in his medicine cabinet. I’m not surprised when I find nothing interesting in there, just your usual bathroom toiletries. It seems Rabbie is perfect in every way possible.
In the shower, I let the warm water run over my body and soak into my aching muscles. The water pressure is amazing as the water massages into my shoulders and back. Memories of seeing Rabbie in a towel flash through my mind, and before I know it I’m grabbing the shower head, and running it over my body. I imagine he’s standing behind me cupping my breasts, and pinching my nipples with his beautiful large hands. Those hands, firm and strong. The way they could wrap around my throat and lightly squeeze, making the rush a thousand times more intense. I move the shower head lower to the ache spot between my legs. The pressure from the water over my sensitive clit makes my legs shake, and a soft moan escapes my lips. Fuck, this feels good.
I picture Rabbie pushing me up against the wall of the shower, his long arms caging me in on either side, his length sliding between my legs and rubbing against my sensitive clit.
“Are you sure you want this?” He grabs my chin and turns my face to look at him.
I nod, unable to find the words to speak. He slips his hard cock inside me and we both let out satisfied moans, he gives me a second to melt around him and adjust to his size. But he’s too impatient, and he pulls out slams back into me, picking up the pace.
“Fuck you feel amazing, mo beag. So tight” He groans in my ear.
He bites down on my neck as he slams deeper and deeper into me.
I wish this was real.
“Harder, fuck me harder.” I beg him.
He pushes harder into me and I let out a little whimper. “I’m going to fill that pretty little pussy.”
Just when I picture that he’s going to come, my orgasm rips through me and it’s so intense I let my head fall back and let go of all the tension I’d been holding in. I’m seeing stars as I ride out my orgasm, I bite down on my lip to stop myself from being too loud. I’m above a cafe full of people, I would die if someone heard me.
That felt so good, too good. My body has that light and airy feeling after an orgasm, I feel sated, and dreamy. The shower head was satisfying, but only a temporary relief. I won’t be long before I know I’ll be too eager for the real deal.
I hop out of the shower, and start getting ready for the day. I pick out my usual denim shorts, large sweatshirt and cowboy boots. I apply winged eyeliner to my eyes, and some tinted blush to my cheeks, and a little dab on my lips.
I scoff down the bowl of yummy granola that Rabbie left out for me. Just standing here in his flat, surrounded by his things has me pining to see him. When I’m finished I quickly wash the bowl and spoon, and lay them on the drying rack. I rush downstairs, excited to see him.