Chapter 1
CHAPTER ONE
JAMES
What the fuck had I just done?
I went to him to take down a company and I left agreeing to be his wife.
I knew in the depths of my weeping heart that this had to happen, that this was the right thing to do.
Sure, the marriage part took me a little by surprise, but honestly? If it is going to take down Secure Corp, then why the hell not? He seems nice enough and the fact that he has agreed to take them down too, well…
Whenever I tried to speak to Rune about his father’s business, nothing seemed to add up. I tried to poke a little, but every time I did, I was met with resistance.
Rune and I hit it off from the get-go, met in college, fell in love, blah blah blah... and then it went south. Quickly.
Things started to fall apart, becoming a little strained between us. I lived with him, gave up everything. I wanted to become an equine vet. Something about horses made me feel that fire in my soul, the calmness in my belly, it kind of made sense... a missing piece of the jigsaw slowly slipping into place if you will.
But Rune didn't like that.
Because he didn’t have control.
Because it meant I had to move away.
And of course, he didn't like that either.
Things became heavy, and before I knew it, I was nodding my head and waiting for my next command. I took a little part time job between studying for my exams—which I passed with flying colors—and then I got the offer of a lifetime.
To move to Montana and work alongside one of the best equine vets known in that state. He worked with barrel racing horses as well as show jumpers, but alas, I never made it out of New York. My parents died when I was seven and I moved in with my grandparents.
My grandparents were from a small town on the outskirts of Montana called Blossom Cove, but I got accepted into Cornell and travelled to live here, in New York. Which I loved at first, it was exciting and new, but then I met Rune. He made me happy until he didn’t, and I wished I could click my heels three times and go back home to my grandparents farm, but I couldn’t. He left me alone in the woods too many times and it took me back to how I felt when my parents died. Hollow. Alone. Empty. I always found my way back out of the darkness, but he would never stand there and help. Just stood by the break in the trees until he saw me, then and only then, did he act like the hero. He wore me down until eventually I had no fight left in me and my dream slowly diminished into nothing so, I had to make the best of my situation. I kept my head down and focused on working to earn as much as I could.
My job was okay, I worked in a tech shop, selling tablets, laptops and phones. Not ideal, but it was money at the end of the day and I needed all I could get if I was going to get out of New York one day and move to Montana to start anew and live the dream I so desperately craved.
I lived with Heidi, and across the hall was Brooke. She liked living on her own. We did ask her to move in with us but she liked her own company and that was fine.
I met the girls in college, and we got on like a house on fire. They made this homesick girl feel welcome, and truthfully, I would have been more upset leaving them then I would Rune.
But leaving him when he told me to was not as hard as I thought it would be.
God, I sound awful.
He wasn’t always the bad guy, but don’t they all start like that? Flowers and candy, sweet little moments, kisses in the rain… then bam, it stops as abruptly as it started.
Rune liked control, he liked to manipulate and gaslight me at any given moment and the fact I managed to pry myself out of his grasp was something to be proud of.
But now?
Now, at the age of twenty-five I have agreed to marry a stranger.
Why?
I suppose you could call it revenge.
Rune and his father, Barnaby, run Secure Corp, a high-end security company for the elite of New York City. But they don’t know that I know Rune has been embezzling money to what looks like an off-shore account.
He never told me, but I found it when I was looking through his office. Stupid move really. It was all there, well, all I could see were large sums being syphoned out of their business, but the rest looked like a math equation.
His father was no saint, but the fact that Rune was doing this so his own flesh and blood wouldn’t get anything didn't sit right with me, so I wanted to make it right.
Wanted to play the game, but only one that doesn't break any rules.
Rune told me that he has an older brother, twenty or so years older than him. He didn't see or speak to him and they cut ties many years ago. But something doesn't ring true; there is no trace of a Rayden Atthill. It was like he never existed.
Like he was a ghost.
If Rayden was an actual person, then I feel it is right that we let him know just what his brother is up to. There were files with Rayden’s name on but I never got a chance to look because Rune came home, raging and spitting feathers over something that had happened at work.
He never did tell me and somehow whatever upset him was my fault.
Like it always was.
He told me to leave, told me he didn't want to be with me anymore and just like that everything I knew was no more.
I was back to being single, lost, and a little scared if I was being totally honest with myself. As much as Rune had his bad points, he also had amazing ones too. He was loving, caring, generous... but he was also very vindictive, selfish, self-absorbed and just an asshole at times. He was Jekyll and Hyde.
I just never knew what side I was going to get.
The constant anxiety. The constant walking on eggshells.
There was never quite the right balance, and honestly, him telling me to leave was the kindest thing he could have ever done for me.
I left my retail job and ended up nannying for Arizona and Keaton. Just an interim thing. But I enjoyed it, a stepping stone towards the bigger picture.
That picture being snowy tipped mountains and rolling green hills.
One evening, Arizona found me shut away in the pantry, knees around my chest as I hugged them tightly and sobbed into them. She asked me what was wrong and I showed her the message from Rune. He said some nasty stuff and for some reason it bothered me more than it normally would have. I spoke a few truths and mentioned the company and that it didn’t sit well with me. She hugged me and told me it was all going to be okay, then she passed me Nate’s number. She said he was the best of the best at what he does and he would be able to find anything I needed, and well, I thought why not.
Now here we are.
I'm standing on the sidewalk in the cool spring breeze outside his townhouse after agreeing to marry him.
He knows of Secure Corp.
It kind of feels like a match made in some weird, twisted fate of heaven.
There is no realness in this relationship we're about to head into, fakeness drips around us, but I am desperate to take Secure Corp down, and if doing this one little thing for Nate makes him want to work with me then why would I not say yes?
No payment to him, a nice payment to me.
Just a signature on a dotted line and an ' I do. '
Another push towards Montana.
It seemed the stars were finally starting to align.
I could finally see the clearing of the woods and Rune wasn’t there waiting.
It was just me.
A year marriage and quick annulment.
What could go wrong?
I glance at the time on my phone and sigh. Shit, I was late to meet the girls for lunch. Lifting my head a little higher, I began walking as I tried to hail a cab.
Pushing through the doors of the restaurant, the warm air pricks my skin as I shrug my coat off and walk towards the host.
“Hi, I’m meeting my friends here, under the name Heidi?” I ask sweetly as I wait to be seated in SaraBeth’s .
“Ah yes, please ma'am, follow me,” the young host gives me a nod as he leads me towards a table tucked into the back.
“You're finally here!” Heidi chimes; her long, golden blonde hair sits in tumbles of waves, honey-colored eyes and dewy skin. She's perfect like a porcelain doll.
“Sorry, I had a work thing,” I half shrug a shoulder up. Wasn’t a complete lie but also wasn’t the truth. Not sure if I am ready to tell them about the wedding yet.
“Twins that hard?” Brooke raises an impeccably shaped brow as she sips on her gin and tonic.
“No, this was more an admin work thing…” I trail off, breaking my gaze from her as I look for the waitress.
“They have you doing admin as well?” she asks, and I am back looking at her.
Chocolate brown hair, green emerald eyes and beautiful caramel skin.
My friends were hot.
“I just do what I am asked,” I sigh a little as I look back around the restaurant for the waitress and she finally catches my gaze.
She walks over, smile widening as she approaches.
“What can I get you?”
“I’ll have a mimosa.”
“Anything else?” She looks around the table and the girls both shake their heads. “Okay, well I’ll be back soon to take your lunch order,” she gives a soft nod then turns on her heel and walks away.
“So,” I breathe out, eyes bouncing between the girls, “any news on the dating front?”
They both look at each other, then shake their heads.
“Nothing.” Heidi rolls her eyes. “Dating apps are a waste of time, no one can seem to converse at a bar anymore, and when you do, they’re only after a quick lay. I’m tired of it, might just sign myself up for a dating programme or something, a bit like the ones where you meet your husband standing at the bottom of the aisle.”
“Bit drastic.”
Says you who has just agreed to marry a man ten minutes after meeting him in some marriage of convenience.
“Maybe,” she shrugs, bringing her glass to her lips, “but I kind of feel desperate.”
“You’re twenty-eight,” my eyes widen slightly before they narrow on her.
“Exactly, not really a spring chicken anymore.” She crinkles her nose, brows furrowing and I let out a little sigh, eyes scoping across her face. “Are my wrinkles showing?” she frowns a little deeper and presses her fingertips to her brow line.
“A little?” I mean, I don’t want to lie to her.
“They’re showing,” Brooke’s words slam against Heidi as she speaks the truth.
“I didn’t think I was due for my Botox top up just yet.”
“Well kind of looks like you are due,” Brooke shrugs her shoulder up slightly.
“Jeez,” I face palm myself at the rawness of Brooke’s words, but that’s just Brooke. She has always been like it. Not one to mix her words, always goes straight for the jugular.
“Fuck you,” Heidi nudges into Brooke’s shoulder and snorts a laugh, Brooke just rolls her eyes as Heidi slips out her phone and begins frantically typing.
“How about you Brooke, anyone on the horizon?” I direct my questions to her just as the waitress places my mimosa down in front of me and I swipe it from the table and take a large mouthful.
“Zilch,” she purses her lips into a pout, head tilting slightly. Brooke is an influencer. She adores fashion and make up. Verified and everything. “But,” she wiggles in her seat as if trying hard to contain her excitement, “do you remember when I was telling you about my idea?” She doesn’t wait for us to answer, “Well, I have pushed production, are you ready to know exactly what it is now?” she places her drink down and her eyes are alight with glee.
“Yeah?” I ask, Heidi huffs heavily beside her. “Ignore her, she’s just jealous she can’t use it yet.”
“Really am not jealous,” Heidi bites back but I keep my focus on Brooke.
Heidi and Brooke are best of friends, really, but this is their love language. Mine is more hugs and smiles and words of affirmation. Heidi and Brooke’s love language is acting like you hate me and I’ll hate you right back.
But it works for them.
I’m not a tough love kind of girl.
More of a wrap me up in your arms and love me with all you have kind of girl.
“So yeah, it’s like a dating app but you connect with people all over the world.”
“Right?” I try to act interested, I really do, but my mind is kind of hazed with Nate and our upcoming nuptials.
“But you have a toy…”
“A toy?” I sit a little taller, kind of fidgeting in my own seat.
“Yeah, goes inside your pussy.”
And I choke on my intake of breath.
I am a prude.
I’ve only been with Rune and that was always kind of basic sex. Always missionary.
Always with the lights off.
“What now?” I finally managed to breathe the words.
“Yeah, it’s a little vibrator that slips inside your pussy and anyone on this app can control it.” She nods, licking her lips, “Also has a little bit for your clit too.”
“Oh wow,” I swallow, my throat suddenly dry as I reach for my glass and drain the glass in one.
“I need it,” Heidi sighs.
“Not long sugar and I’ll get you on it.”
“Connected with a few guys, some amazing orgasms, so yeah… not all bad I suppose.”
“Mmm,” I hum, grabbing the menu and glancing at my options, or, truthfully, more to hide the pink that is scattering across my cheeks as the seconds go on.
“As soon as I have them, I’ll be sending two your way,” she throws me a wink and my eyes widen over the menu, shrinking back into my seat.
“Oh yes,” Heidi sits back, wide grin on her face as she claps her hands together in excitement.
“Give mine to one of your followers or something,” I try to play it down as much as I can, but she sees right through me.
“Babe,” she reaches her hand across the table and covers mine with hers, “it’s been a while… Plus, it’ll be nice for you to experience what an orgasm actually feels like instead of having to fake it.”
My cheeks flame red, as I hear the waitress say, “have you decided yet?”
Brooke gives me a reassuring smile before turning her menu over.
“We’ll take three of the lobster rolls.”
Ground.
Swallow.
Me.
Whole.