Chapter 8
CHAPTER EIGHT
NATE
I watched tentatively at her facial expressions as she read through the contract. I couldn't read all of them but for some reason it unnerved me and put a bubble of doubt deep inside of me. Stomach knotting and heart racing with anxiety.
I didn't want to hurt her, but at the same time I didn't want to lead her on or give her the wrong idea... but none of what has happened over the last twenty-four hours has been disingenuous. Everything that has happened I have wanted too.
I open my mouth and close it again as she flicks what seems aggressively to the back page of the contract, scribbles her name and date before pushing from the table and storming upstairs, the sound of her bedroom door slamming and echoing through the house.
“Shit,” I curse, sitting back in my chair and pushing my hand through my hair.
Sitting quietly for a moment, I look down the hallway before my eyes land back on the contract. Edging forward, I reach my fingers across the table and pull the contract back towards me, flicking through and reading certain sentences and I groan softly.
Maybe I was a little too near the mark with this?
It did sound like a shitty contract, and that wasn't my intention.
My intention was to keep both of us protected, keep us safe and I hate that I have now upset her over literally words on paper.
Sighing heavily, my chest rattles as I reach for the same pen and scribble my name on the dotted line and date it then push it away as if it scalded my fingers.
Scrubbing my face, my phone beeps in my pocket and I slip it out and see Kaleb's name. Tipping my head back, I push the answer button and lift it to my ear.
“Yeah,” I grunt into the mouthpiece.
“What's wrong with you?” he instantly asks and I hate that I can't hide my annoyance from him.
“Nothing, just had some shit this morning,” I look back towards the hallway, should I go up there?
“Wanna talk about it?” he pushes delicately.
“Nope,” I shut that conversation down in an instant. Not today. Not ever.
A soft rumble of a laugh floats through my ear and I can hear Connie in the background, ‘ Baby, say hello to Nate for me ’.
“Hey Connie,” I answer back, and Kaleb repeats it.
I wait as I hear muffled voices.
“So, what do you want?”
“I need someone looking into, had a call from someone out in Montana wanting to know about a guy from Los Angeles.”
“Right,” I rub my fingers against my temple.
“Can you do it?”
“Why did this need to be dealt with now?” I glance at the time, “It's eleven a.m. on a Saturday morning.”
“And you have better things to do?” Yes . I pause. “Exactly,” an exasperated sigh vibrates through the phone “So yeah, the guy’s called Luke, I’ll get the details from Titus. Some kid called Pacey called and asked for his whereabouts, not sure why, but yeah...”
“Cool, just send it over when you have it.”
“No problem.”
“How are the wedding plans going?” I snipe in quickly and I hear the deafly silence that coats the phone line.
“Errr...” he pauses for a moment, no doubt looking at Connie for the words he needs. “Okay I think, only a couple of weeks and I'll be a married man... then it's just you left…” and I cut him off.
Nothing else was needed. Just wanted to make sure I had the date right, and well, honestly, wanted to know how long I had to patch things up with James.
Turning my phone face down, I drum my fingers against the desk, and I feel frustrated.
I fight with my thoughts for a good ten minutes about whether I should go up there or not or leave her to stew.
I ignore the thoughts that tell me not to do it, and before I can stop myself, I am stepping up outside her room and knocking on her door.
Waiting for a response, I knock again.
“What?” I hear the snap in her voice which makes my blood boil a little hotter.
My trembling hand moves forward as I push the door handle down, foot just in the door. “May I come in?”
“Yes,” she sighs when I poke my head around the door and see her laying on the bed, eyes pinned to the white ceiling.
“Have I upset you?” I tread cautiously across the carpet, hands fisted deep inside my gray sweatpants.
“Nope.”
One word answers. This is where she shows her age.
“Clearly I have.” Masking my irritation in a playful tone I take another step forward and I am standing toe to toe with her. Well kind of, her legs hang over the bed, feet hovering just above mine.
“I'm hungover. Just groggy,” she pushes up onto her elbows, eyes bouncing between mine and I don't miss the redness that mists the whites of her pretty blues.
She's been crying.
My heart aches.
“Anything I can do to help?”
She shakes her head from side to side.
“Hungry?”
“No,” she flops back down on the bed, her arms lifting above her head as her hands cover her eyes.
“It's the contract isn't it,” I push my luck, my head tilted as I looked down at her. Her cropped tee lifted slightly showing her creamy white skin, loose waisted gray sweatpants which the band of her panties peek over. Temptation of tracing her skin burns across my fingertips, but I restrain and keep my hands firmly buried in my pockets.
She is back up on her elbows, a pretty scowl etched into her face.
“I knew the contract was coming,” she says in defence.
“Right?” I question keeping my tone soft.
“Right?” she repeats my words and my lips twitch at the corners. “Why are you smirking?” and the fire burns deep in her eyes as they volley between mine.
“I'm not,” I roll my lips and drop my head.
“Pfft,” she rolls her eyes.
“So, back to the burning question...” I trail off as I wait for her to answer me. But she doesn’t.
“What's upset you?”
She steadies her gaze on me, and I refuse to pull away even though as each second goes on the pressure to slice my eyes from hers overwhelms me.
She nibbles on her bottom lip, and I swear it's because she is trying to stop it from trembling. Her cheeks blush apple red and I refuse to lift my gaze from her.
“Tell me,” and my command comes out a little harder than intended.
“Why? What's the point?” That sharp tongue soon rolls back, her tongue teasing at her top lip as she dampens it. “Because nothing will change,” she squeezes out.
Inhaling heavily, my chest aches.
“Nothing has to change, it's just a contract...”
“Exactly that, Nate. It's a contract.” She stops abruptly and turns her face away from me, tongue in her cheek as an unimpressed laugh puffs out of her.
“What?”
“Nothing, just leave it.” Her eyes slice to mine and the once sapphire blues that shone so bright are now stones. “I've signed the contract and will act like you have stipulated,”
and I don't know why, but her words lash across my skin like a whip, marking me in an instant and just when I think she is finished she hits me again. “I'll act like the perfect little wife, Nate. I'll put on a show when you need me to, but that's it.”
She winds me, air sucking from my lungs as I step back.
My mask is firmly on. Face all stoic. Jaw locked tight.
“Okay cool,” she smiles at me, “you can leave now.”
I try to find the words, but I can't. I nod repeatedly and turn on my heel before I walk out of her room and slam the door behind me.
Fumbling for my phone, I click on his name and wait for him to answer.
“Well hello Nate.”
“I'm coming over,” I cut it off before running down the stairs and swiping my keys from the side unit before closing the front door and walking to my car.
My head feels messy, busy even. Turning the engine on, the music softly fills the small space before I pull onto the side road and head towards my friend’s house.
I just needed out for a moment or two.
Parking halfway down the street, I slip my ring off and tuck it inside my pocket as my heavy footsteps hit the sidewalk towards the house; walking through the gate and down the path, climbing the three steps in one stride before knocking on the door.
I wait for a beat until the door swings open and Ari looks dumbfounded.
“Did your husband not tell you that I was coming?” I lean in and kiss her on the cheek as I step around her.
“No,” she smiles, “but I'm not surprised to be honest.”
I look down the hallway, it's quiet, too quiet.
“Where are S and S?” I stare up the stairs and then back to Arizona.
“With grandad.”
“Lucky grandad,” I smirk, and she closes the door behind me.
“The break is welcomed,” she sighs as she passes me and leads me towards the kitchen. Our houses are similar. Mine is older than theirs; theirs is more modern where I kept a more rustic look. I glance at the pictures on the wall of them all as a family and my heart swells a little in my chest.
Still don't want children.
“Where is the big man?” I ask, my fingers teasing my wedding band in my pocket that is still safely away.
“Here,” his low voice echoes around the kitchen and I see him sitting at the dining room table reading the newspaper.
Keaton is Kaleb's twin. Not identical. Keaton can be a bit of a sarcastic prick at times, but he is fiercely loyal. Just in case you didn't know, Kaleb is engaged to Connie, who is Killian's daughter. Titus is married to Amora, Xavier's daughter and Keaton is married to Arizona, which you guessed it... Titus' daughter. Are you sensing a theme here?
“Coffee, Nate?” and I look over my shoulder at Ari and give her a nod. “Black?”
“With creamer and two sugars please,” and she stares at me a little longer, but I break away when Keaton raises a brow.
“What?”
“Since when have you had creamer and sugar?”
Her name is on the tip of my tongue, but I manage to bite it away.
“Just fancied it,” I shrug a shoulder up and sink into the dining chair.
“Right...” she trails off and I cast my gaze towards the long garden. “Here we go,” Ari says softly as she places my coffee on a coaster, and I smile up at her.
“Thanks Ari,” I nod, wrapping my fingers around the cup then bringing it to my lips, blowing softly before taking a mouthful, my brows meet and my nose scrunches. It doesn't taste like James'. I lick my lips and take another mouthful, but it tastes bitter.
Keaton coughs and I slice my attention to him, Arizona stands with her hands on her hips, one brow raised high.
“Did I not want one?” his tone drips sarcasm.
“I don't know, did you ask for one?” one hand slips up, her fingers tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
“Did I have to?”
She tips her head back and laughs softly.
“I'm not your maid Keat. Want a drink? Ask for one or make yourself one.” She shakes her head and turns on her heel.
“Blossom,” the nickname falls from his lips, and she smiles at him over her shoulder.
“Yes, baby?”
“Can I have a coffee please?” he bats his lashes, and she blows him a kiss.
“Of course, you can,” she winks and pops a pod into the machine.
“Nate.” Keaton's tone pulls me from their conversation. I don't respond, just look at him. “I mean this in the nicest possible way...” he trails off for just a moment, his lips pulling into a shit eating grin, “why are you here?”
“Keaton,” Ari scolds him as she walks across with a hot cup of coffee and places it in front of her husband before leaning down and kissing him on the lips, his lips break into a smirk as she pulls away and walks towards the door, his eyes skating down her body as he checks his wife out and I sit disgusted.
I am so glad that he has found love, kind of weirds me out that it's our best friend's daughter but hey, who am I to judge?
“What?” he snaps then chuckles, his hand on his stomach.
“Nothing,” I quip, taking another mouthful of my coffee.
He eyes me, brows raised as he takes a mouthful of his own coffee.
“Why are you here?” he taps his left hand on the table.
“Are you aware of this job your brother called in?”
“Sort of,” he nods, his coffee cup sitting on the coaster.
“What do you know?”
“Probably the same as you.”
“Hmmm, doubt that,” I tilt my head to the side. “Why us?”
“Who knows, Titus said the guy found us online.”
“Montana though...”
“Yup,” he pauses, “what has Kaleb told you?”
“Just about looking into some guy called Luke?”
“Same.”
“And that's all you've been told?” I push my glasses up my nose.
“Yes Nate, that's all I have been told, what's eating you?”
“Nothing,” I slam my lips shut, trailing my finger over the grooves of the wooden table.
“Nate,” he doesn't buy my bullshit.
“Hm,” I pop my head up and lock my eyes with his.
“What's going on?”
“Nothing.” It's got so easy to lie around these guys. I can literally shut down in front of them and they wouldn't even notice.
“Fine,” he rolls his eyes, crossing his leg over his knee and reaching for his coffee again.
We sit in silence. Arizona walks back in, eyes bouncing between the two of us and Keaton just gives a shrug of the shoulders.
Sure, we may not be talking but it's nice to be here, nice to have other people around me and not James.
I wanted to give her space; I needed the space. It had been a day, and I had already managed to fuck it up.
A heavy sigh vibrates through me, and I feel their eyes on me.
“Nate, talk to me.”
“I can't,” and that's the truth. I can't. Not yet anyway. Okay, sure, I technically could tell them, but I don't want to at the moment. They'll find out soon enough but until then, the less people that know the better.
“What is it about?” Keaton presses and I find myself sighing again, running my fingertips up and down the side of my cup.
“Remember the side stuff I have been dealing with...” and I side eye Ari, hoping Keaton reads my body language.
“Sure,” a one word answer passes his lips and I nod.
“Well, an aspect of that has taken a slight unexpected twist.”
“Good?”
“I think so...” I trail off, dropping my head as I look over at Ari again and she zips her lips up.
“Right?”
“That's it.”
Keaton's shoulders lift and fall before he scrubs his face.
“Cool,” he sounds exasperated. I get it though.
I am vague.
“Wanna play some Xbox?” he pushes from his seat, and I mimic him. “Only if it's okay with you my princess,” Keaton treads carefully over to where Arizona is, wrapping his arms around her waist and smiling against her lips.
“Of course, but I want you to spend some time with me before the boys are back,” she murmurs and kisses him, and I walk out of the room and disappear into his gaming room.
Not about watching a PDA.
Sitting on the sofa, I turn his console on and set up COD and wait for him. Not sure if this is what he wants to play but this is what was already loaded on so.
I hear his footsteps, the door closing softly behind him and I snigger.
“You're so pussy whipped,” I shake my head from side to side.
“I am not.”
“You so are dude, having to ask if you can play...”
“Fuck off, Nate.”
And I chuckle a little louder as we lock into a game.
I have no idea how many hours I have spent gaming, but I am finally on my way home. I haven't heard from James but why would I? She is annoyed with me, and I am kind of annoyed with her, but I am unsure why. Just know that I feel it in my stomach. I feel unsettled, a little angsty and shit, so yeah, I am annoyed with her too.
Pulling into my spot outside the house, I sit for a moment and look up at my home. I love it here, not sure if I would ever want to move. I am close to everything, New York is all I have known. But now there is James, and I have to painfully remind myself that she is only temporary.
Cutting the engine, I finally roll out of the car and walk up to the house, slipping the key in the lock and letting myself in.
Jeff greets me instantly, rubbing himself up against my legs and I realize he is waiting for his second bowl of food.
Bending down, I give him a soft stroke.
“Sorry dude,” I whisper as I walk towards the laundry room and reach for his biscuits and pouch. Lifting his bowl from the floor, I fill it then place it back down which gets me an approving purr.
Moving into the kitchen, I glance at the time, it's past four. Shit, I have been gone ages. Opening the fridge, I look at our options for dinner and decide on steak and creamed potato.
I hear the floorboards creak upstairs and lift my head, eyes pinned to the ceiling.
Do I go up there? Grabbing two beers out the door of the fridge, I close it, and it seems my mind has already decided for me.
Climbing the stairs two at a time, her door is still closed.
It's quiet.
Kind of feel bad for leaving her, but I needed to leave because I was worried I would have said something to hurt her and I didn't want that. She could hurl all sorts at me, and I would take it, it's just another mark on my already scarred skin. But the thought of hurting her or upsetting her further? I couldn't.
Never.
I hover my hand over the door, ready to knock, but just as I do, she swings it open. Her eyes dart to my face before falling to where my beer is.
“I could see your shadow,” sarcasm drips from her tone like venom.
Lifting my chin, I give a snort of a laugh.
“Look...” I run my spare hand around the back of my head.
“You don't need to say anything,” her fingers tighten around the edge of the door, her other hand resting on her hip.
“No, I kind of do,” I nod, swallowing down the lump that has presented itself in my throat.
She goes to open her mouth, and I hold my finger up, my eyes finally connecting with hers.
“I didn't handle the situation very well... I mean I am all new to this. I've never been in this situation, but I know I didn't conduct myself great. I should have followed you, but instead, I ran.”
Pausing, I exhale sharply.
“That wasn't right, and I am sorry.”
I watch as she swallows, her head bobbing as she nods.
“For what it's worth...” a soft smile tugs at her lips, her fingers loosening from the edge of the door, “I am sorry too.”
My own smile creeps onto my lips as I hold out a bottle for her which she takes happily.
“To us,” I whisper as we clink bottle necks.
“To us,” she nods before we each take a mouthful.