Chapter 45
CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
JAMES
I lay, belly down on the sun lounger on the decked area of the hut, Nate is sitting in the hot tub, mirrored aviator glasses on, whilst sipping a beer. Reaching behind me, I tug the string of my bikini and let it fall before I lift the halter neck off and discard it to the floor. He is watching. I know he is.
I twist my head, pulling my hair over my shoulder as I look across at Killian and Reese who are about to swim, and next to them is Arizona and Titus with Twyla.
My heart skips a beat of how fond I have become with my found family. I will forever thank my lucky stars that they came into my life, or more so me coming into their life.
I wiggle my ass on the sun lounger when I feel a shadow form across my body, soft droplets of water falling onto the back of my legs and my lower back.
“You're blocking my sun.”
“You're turning red,” he groans, a little disapproving.
I lift my head and look at him, brows a little furrowed but I keep my chest covered.
“That's a tan, not burnt,” I scrunch my nose.
“You look burnt...”
“I can assure you I am not,” I roll my eyes and lay back down, letting my eyes flutter shut and I hear the low growl from him.
Smirking when the sun is back on my skin, I am glad he stepped back.
James 1, Nate 0.
But oh, how wrong was I.
The shadow is back, and I hear the sound of a lid clipping open before a cool liquid is squirted onto my back.
“Nate!” I moan, but his hands are on me, massaging the thick lotion into my skin and I roll my lips, not wanting to admit that I am actually enjoying this more than I care to admit.
“I do not want my wife getting burned.”
I open my mouth then slam it closed again. Some days I can argue, others, I decide it's not worth it. This was one of those days.
“That's very caring of you,” I taunt him just as his fingers slip down into the back of my bikini bottoms.
“Nate, stop it,” I hiss, pressing up and looking around at our surroundings.
“I'm not doing anything,” his fingers are back out and rubbing into my lower back.
“You're being a tease,” he does it again and my lips twist.
“And what?” he taunts and a soft laugh bubbles through me.
“And it's inappropriate, Mr Spencer,” a smirk lifts at the corner of my mouth and I roll my head to look at him, eyes narrowing on him.
“Nothing is ever inappropriate when it comes to me and you, James.”
Laughing, I roll over onto my front but have my arms across my chest.
“I'm sure there will be something.”
Nate's lips twitch as he looks down at me as he fights his smile.
“I will never tire of you.”
“Good,” I wrinkle my nose then stand from the sun lounger, my black bikini bottoms ruched between my ass cheeks as I walk into the hut but not without catching him checking me out as I grab myself a water from the mini fridge. Unscrewing the cap, I drink a few mouthfuls, sweat beading against my skin and I need to cool down.
Placing my bottle back down, I walk into the bathroom and grab a hair tie, dragging my wavy red hair into a high ponytail before I reach for my large, black sunglasses that sit on the side table as I walk back out of the hut and to where Nate is standing, looking out to the ocean.
Covering my chest, I swipe up my bikini top and place it over my head and give it a loose tie around my back. I walk closer to Nate, as I curl my fingers around the neck of his beer and bring it to my own lips as I take a mouthful and lick my lips of the excess.
“I'm going for a dip...” I take another mouthful then press it back it into his open hand.
“Thirsty wife?” he looks over his mirrored aviators at me.
“Parched,” I smile as I lower myself down, sitting on the edge of the decked area, my toes dipping into the warm, clear ocean. I see Connie and Kaleb in the distance, they’re laughing and playing about in the water and my heart swells.
Curling my fingers around the edge of the deck, I glance my eyes back over my shoulder at him before I push and fall into the warm ocean and begin to swim away from Nate, a relieved sigh passing my lips as I am instantly cool.
I am in paradise, and I never want to leave.
My eyes are on my husband as I curl my finger, calling him towards me.
I watch as he saunters towards me, his eyes casting to our friends before he's attention is on me.
“You coming in?” I swim back, floating on my back, my head tipped back.
“Depends,” he sucks in air through his teeth, a soft smirk on his lips as he looks to the right where Dex and Sage are sunbathing on their deck.
“On?”
“On what's in it for me?”
I laugh, loudly.
“Cooling your body temperature,” I sigh, continuing to float.
“Hmm, I feel okay,” he shrugs a shoulder up and takes a swig of his beer.
“Suit yourself,” I flip him off then flip and swim a little further out and honestly, I have never felt more relaxed than I do now.
The next few days pass in a blur and we're suddenly all sitting for our last night dinner.
“I don't want to go home,” I admit, sighing as I sip on my crisp white wine and Arizona nods in agreement.
“Neither do it, it truly has been a little slice of heaven,” she hums, taking her own mouthful.
“Have you enjoyed your honeymoon?” I turn my attention to Connie, and she gives me a heavy nod, her fingers wrapped around a crystal whiskey glass.
“It's been amazing, made even better by having all of our family and friends here,” she widens her grin as she throws her arm around my shoulders and pulls me towards her.
“I am so glad Nate chose you; you're like the missing piece that just slotted into our group so perfectly. Nate needed you, but we never knew just how much.”
Her words make my heart swell to double the size as Connie pulls me into her and places a kiss on the side of my head.
“I am so grateful for each and every one of you,” I admit, my eyes floating around the room at my newfound family.
We all raise our glasses and clink them together in the middle of the table.
Nate appears behind me, bending down and placing a kiss on the top of my head.
“What you lot gossiping about?” He smirks as he pings his gaze around the group of girls.
“Just how happy our little James makes you Natey Poo,” Connie says in a babyish voice and I laugh softly.
“She does, she makes me really happy,” his hand slips over my shoulder as he gives it a soft squeeze.
“And you make me happy,” I tilt my head back so it's against his body as I look up at him, his spare hand wraps around my throat as he smiles, lowering his lips down to me as he seals them with a soft kiss.
“I don't think I will ever get used to seeing Nate in love,” and he freezes at Keaton's words and the smile that he was once wearing with pride now dims out to a shadow.
His hand drops quickly from my throat, and he stands up before walking back to his seat.
“Oops,” Arizona says with grimace, “think Keaton may have upset him,” and Reese glances down the table then to me, all of the girls have a confused look on their face.
“You know what he’s like,” I shrug it off, probably just caught him off guard.
“Yeah...” Connie's voice trails off as she gives Amora a look, but I ignore it, reaching for my drink once more and taking a huge mouthful.
“What are you plans when you're back home, are you back to work?” Amora asks, trying to diffuse the situation by changing the subject.
“I am hoping to,” I smile at Arizona, and she nods.
“We can't wait to have you back,” she looks at the boys who are sleeping in the strollers and I hear a heavy sigh pass her lips. “That sounds awful, I know and I love being a mom, being their mom, but my God,” she turns to look at us, “no one prepares you for how hard it's going to be,” and Amora nods along with Reese.
“Oh my God it is so hard,” Reese begins, “like, they prepare you for the pregnancy and the birth, but no one tells you what to do after... like you're just handed this baby to look after.”
Connie puffs out her cheeks.
“This is why I don't know if I want kids?” she kind of asks the question instead of telling us. “I can just about look after myself, let alone a baby.”
“I get it,” Amora slips in. “Before Twyla, I wasn't sure if I wanted to be a mom, I kind of wanted to be selfish but, honestly, now she is here... I can't imagine my life without her. I have no idea how I used to fill my days up before she came along.”
“You slept, and went out and watched whatever you wanted to,” Connie interjects.
Amora has a sad smile on her lips.
“I didn't have the freedom to do that, and when I did, I was already pregnant with her,” she drops her head for a moment and Titus has lifted his head and is looking down our end of the table.
Arizona puts her thumb up to reassure her dad that Amora is okay.
Sage places her arm around Amora.
“Don't be sad,” her British voice floats across and Amora half laughs.
“I'm not sad, just kind of hurts when I think back to that time, the time before Titus,” she swallows and her eyes move to her husband, she looks at him with adoration in her eyes.
“I understood why my dad done it, but it still didn't make it any easier. Was a bitter pill to swallow.”
“I can imagine,” Reese creeps in, tilting her head to the side.
“But look at me now, here, with my friends, family and my husband. Everyone has a past, everyone has moments of their lives that I am sure they wish to forget but it's those experiences that make you the person you are today, make you a little more resilient, a little more empathetic, a little more loving... and we have our trauma to thank for that.”
We all nod.
“Damn, that took a turn,” Arizona laughs, her brown curly hair long as she flicks it over her shoulder.
“Didn't it,” Connie raises a brow and sips her drink. “What about you, James?”
And I scrunch my nose up, a small shrug of the shoulders.
“I'm not sure, we haven't spoken about it... I’ve always kind of been on the fence, one minute it’s a yes, then it’s a no, but then if I met the right person and everything felt right then...”
“Yeah, I get it.”
“Were any of your pregnancies planned?” I find myself asking, not that it matters.
Arizona lifts her hand.
“I mean, the one before wasn't, but we planned for the boys.”
Everyone else shakes their heads softly.
“These guys must have super sperm,” I make a light joke, and they all laugh.
“You better watch out then,” Reese winks at me and I feel my skin cool with a blanket of goosebumps smothering me.
“I'm on the shot, I have no plans to start a family just yet anyway.”
“But maybe someday, right?” and I hadn't even noticed that Nate had wandered back over. I twist in my seat and look at him over my shoulder, a small smile gracing my lips.
“Maybe?” I float the idea because I have no idea where this is coming from. “Changed your mind?” I kind of feel like this conversation should be had behind closed doors and not at a dinner table with our nearest and dearest.
“Yeah, think so, maybe one day,” he nods, his hand folded into his pocket.
“One day,” I repeat, my voice low as I turn my back onto him and finish my drink.
“You ready?” he lowers his lips to my bare shoulder and places a kiss there.
I nod, giving the girls all a smile as I push away from the table and take his hand, following as he leads me back to our room.
We sit on the deck, the night is clear, the moon is high in the sky and we both sit silently with a glass of champagne.
“Have you had a nice break?” I ask him, but not lifting my eyes from the calmness of the sea.
“Yeah,” his voice is low, tired maybe. “It's been well needed.”
I nod.
“The massages, the walks, the food, the drink, the company...” I roll my face towards him, “it has all been needed.”
He nods firmly.
“The massages were my favorite,” he wiggles his brows, and I roll my eyes.
“Of course they were,” shaking my head I am back focussing on the way the moon light reflects off the water.
“I think I have made a little progress on Secure Corp.”
My ears prick.
“Yeah?” I trail off, finger tapping against the delicate flute.
“Yeah, think I should be able to start pulling it to pieces,” and his lip lifts slightly.
“Do you know where the money is going?”
“I am ninety percent certain.”
I nod. Kind of feels a little weird knowing that this is coming to an end.
He nods back.
“But I have a few more bits I need to look into, you know, just to triple check.”
“What does this mean for us?” I hate how vulnerable and needy I sound, but there is no way that I am ready for this to be over.
“Nothing,” he looks at me, holding his hand out for me to take. “Nothing at all, me and you... this...” he looks down at my wedding band, “till death do us part baby, there is no way I can let you go... even in death I would find you,” and my heart stutters in my chest. “It's true what Kaleb said tonight.”
I suck in the air between my teeth and hold it for a second or two.
“It is weird seeing me in love.”
I release it, it trembles as I do, and my heart skips a beat.
“In love?” I find myself asking because I don't know if I truly believe him.
He drops my hand for just a moment, placing his glass onto the level deck and stands, pulling me with him then taking my glass from my hand and placing it on the small table beside our chairs.
His arm wraps around my back, sliding me closer to him, his warm breath on my face, his eyes dancing with mine.
His shaky fingers lift and brush a loose curl from my face, he smiles softly as he tucks it behind my ear and my heart stops beating for just a moment.
“Yes, baby... in love.”
I swallow down the words that want to vomit out around the lump that has lodged itself in my throat.
“I love you, James Spencer... with all I have.”
I don't care how he reacts in this moment, I clasp my hands to his cheeks and pull his lips towards mine, slanting them across as his tongue dips into my mouth.
My heart implodes in my chest before it pieces back together again as his words sift through me.
Yes, baby. In love. I love you. Love. Love. LOVE.
“Never let me go,” I whisper as I break away, “and I’ll never leave you alone in the woods.” He smiles; his forehead pressed against mine as we stand in perfect silence.
“I love you,” I whisper into the evening.
His smile widens and it makes my heart ache.
“Say it again,” he begs.
“I love you.”
“Again,” his dimple presses into his cheek.
“I love you,” my own smile creeping onto my face.
“One more time,” and now his lips are inches from mine.
“I love you, Mr Spencer,” his mouth crashes into mine and every little feeling that has been slowly creeping into my chest, explodes. Nate Spencer has made his way into my heart and I never, ever want him to leave.