Chapter 35
NATHAN
The door clicks shut behind us, and I don’t even get the chance to breathe before Logan’s mouth is on mine again. It’s a little messy and desperate. He kisses me like he’s furious about how long we’ve waited.
And I don’t even blame him.
He pushes me back a step, then another, his hands grabbing my jacket, tugging until it’s sliding off my shoulders.
He pauses when my jacket hits the floor, just… watching me for a while, like he’s not sure if this is really happening. Like he’s scared if he blinks, I’ll disappear back into the guy I was a week ago, a month ago. The one who kissed him in secret and looked away in public.
Not anymore.
His lips twitch into a grin, and he shakes his head, letting out a little laugh. “I still can’t believe you kissed me right in front of the bar.”
I huff out a laugh, wrapping my arms around his neck, playing with the hair at the nape. “Turns out life without you is so much scarier than whatever I was scared of before.”
His grin settles and his eyes soften as his hands slide down my arms, fingers curling into mine. “I’m going to be so good to you, Nathan. I promise.”
I don’t need him to promise. I know he’s going to make me the happiest man alive because he already has, in the short months since this whole thing started.
He leans in and kisses me slowly, my eyes fluttering closed at the feel of his lips on mine. His lips are on my jaw, then my throat, and I’m already groaning, already hard, already losing any chance at control I might’ve had.
His hands slide into my hair, pulling me closer, and I melt before I can think twice.
We stumble back until my knees hit the mattress. I sit, dragging him with me, his mouth still on mine, letting out a muffled laugh when our teeth knock.
He pushes me down, sprawling over me as he straddles me. He grinds down once, grinning at the sound I make.
My head drops back with a groan. “Fucking hell,” I mutter.
He leans in, brushing his mouth right next to my ear. “You like that?”
My body breaks out into shivers when he kisses that spot. “I think you know I do.”
I drag my hands up his sides, brushing my thumb along his ribs, and he kisses me again, slower this time, his teeth scraping gently across my bottom lip.
We lose the rest of our clothes piece by piece between kisses. He rips off my shirt, pulls my pants down my legs, joining his on the floor, and then we’re on the bed, rubbing against each other like teenagers in the back of a car.
He rolls his hips against me, the pressure of his cock grinding against mine making me curse under my breath. His hips keep moving, giving me just enough friction to drive me insane, and I grip his waist to keep myself grounded.
Logan’s always confident; he has been since the first day I met him, so when he pulls back slightly, looking almost… nervous, it catches me off guard.
He swallows, keeping his eyes on mine. “I want you inside me tonight.”
I freeze. Because… fuck. I wasn’t expecting that.
He watches the look on my face, and his brows shoot up. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” he says quickly, his thumb brushing my hip.
“No,” I cut in, voice low and hoarse. “No, that’s not it. I just—are you sure?”
“Am I sure about you pushing that big cock of yours inside me?” He smirks. “Fuck yes.”
I let out a laugh, my dick twitching at the idea.
“I trust you.” He squeezes my hip. “I want this. With you.”
My heart’s beating out of my chest and all I can do is stare at him for a second, my brain trying to catch up to the reality of what he just offered me.
Something in me cracks and I breathe hard, curling a hand around the back of his head. “I love you,” I say, my heart bleeding for him.
His breath hitches slightly, and for once he doesn’t joke or deflect. He just smiles and presses his forehead to mine. “I love you too, Nathan. So fucking much.”
I swallow hard, my throat dry from those words. I didn’t think I would ever get to hear them. From anyone. Least of all, him, but it feels better than anything I imagined it could feel like.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” I say with a shake of my head. “Or screw it up or—”
“You won’t.” He leans in, brushing his mouth against mine. “You could trip over your own feet and break the headboard and I’d still think it was perfect because it’s you.”
A laugh bursts out of me. “That’s the worst reassurance I’ve ever heard.”
Sure, it’s not my first time. I’ve slept with women before, but I’ve never fucked a guy. And I’m terrified of doing something wrong.
He smirks, grinding down on me again, breaking me out of my thoughts. “I remember you telling me you wanted to fuck me.”
It feels like a lifetime ago when I uttered those words to him. Back then, I was so confused, so conflicted about what my body was feeling anytime my eyes found him. And even though I love feeling him inside me, owning every inch of my body, I’ve thought about the reverse for so long.
“Yeah,” I admit, with a shaky laugh. “I do.”
He hums, leaning into me until our lips are stacked. “Then stop spiraling and do it.”
I smile and kiss him again, harder this time, rolling us so I’m above him, his hands sliding down my back to tug me closer.
I kiss him like I’m learning him all over again, tracing the line of his jaw, the hollow of his throat, the sharp edge of his collarbone. He’s so beautiful. Every inch of him is so fucking gorgeous.
Logan lifts his head and presses a soft kiss to my chest, just over my heart, which is beating like crazy, and then another lower, and another, until I’m practically trembling. He drags his mouth back up to my neck, kissing the spot underneath my jaw. “Take what you want. I’m yours tonight.”
Fuck. Those words light me up from the inside. I kiss him hard, wanting to tell him that he’s right. He’s mine. But not just for tonight. Forever.
He gasps under me when I kiss down his body, tracing the lines of his muscles with my tongue. I lift my head to watch him exhale hard when I follow the line of hair below his navel as I pull his boxers off.
His cock is hard and flushed, twitching against his stomach, already leaking by the time I wrap my hand around him.
He lets his head fall back against the pillow and lets out a sound that makes heat surge through me when I wrap my lips around him. I let my tongue circle the tip of his cock before I take more, easing down inch by inch.
“Holy fuck,” he pants, his fingers gripping my hair.
I hum around him, my hand stroking what my mouth can’t take. His body tenses and his tight abs flex with every suck and drag of my tongue.
I pull back just far enough to lick a stripe along the underside of his cock, then take him deep again until he hits the back of my throat.
He lets out a ragged, choked-off sound, and squeezes his eyes shut. “God, your mouth—fuck—”
I glance up at him, pulling off him with a slick pop, breathing hard. My lips are wet, my chin shiny, and I’m aching, so turned on I can barely think straight.
My cock twitches in my boxers when I look at him, sprawled out across my bed with his legs open, his cock hard and glistening against his stomach.
I reach for the lube without a word, slicking my fingers as he leans back into the pillows, spreading his legs wider without breaking eye contact.
He props one knee up, giving me space to move in between. One hand drifts down his stomach, wrapping it around his cock, giving it a slow stroke as he watches me.
I shift between his legs, groaning at the sight of his hole waiting to be filled by me and Logan reaches out, wraps his hand around mine, guiding it lower until my slick fingers brush over his hole.
“Start slow,” he murmurs. “Just one.”
I nod and press gently when he lets his hand drop, my breath catching in my throat as I ease my finger in. Fuck, he’s so tight.
Logan exhales hard, his head falling back, and I freeze immediately.
“You okay?” I ask.
“Yeah,” he says, his voice a little strained. “It’s just… Fuck. It’s been a while.” He cracks one eye open, gives me a lazy half-smile. “Forgot how good it feels. Keep going.”
His body’s warm around me, tight, the lube slicking his hole but not hiding the way his muscles grip around my knuckle when I push in deeper.
“Move it a little,” he says, his breath ragged. “Curl it up until you—” He jolts, letting out a loud moan. “Fuck yes. Right there.”
I hook my finger, rubbing against the soft, rubbery spot inside him, his cock leaking onto his stomach.
Goddamn. I want to lick it up.
I underestimated how hot it would be to finger Logan’s tight hole. I’m so close to losing my mind.
I lean down and kiss his chest, letting my free hand stroke him while the other works him open slowly. He’s warm, tight, so fucking perfect around my fingers, and every sound he makes just feeds the fire under my skin.
I add a second finger, stretching him open while he moans through gritted teeth. I stroke his cock slowly, watching the way his mouth drops open, the flush creeping down his chest and I don’t even know how I’m still holding it together.
“Fuck, Nathan. Just fuck me, please.”
“Wait,” I say, kissing the inside of his thigh, adding a third finger, stretching him open. “Just a little more.”
He groans. “If you don’t fuck me soon, I’m gonna lose my mind.”
“I thought you liked to tease,” I say, but my voice is shaking. I’m so turned on I could come just from my fingers in his ass.
“Yeah, well,” he huffs, eyes fluttering. “I didn’t know it’d feel like this.”
I ease my fingers out, slow and careful, and press a kiss to his hip, grinning like I’m not seconds from blowing my load already.
“Now you know how it feels,” I say, crawling up his body to kiss him.
He doesn’t just kiss me back, he devours me. I moan into his mouth, when his tongue brushes against mine. He wraps an arm around my back, flips us over in one motion, and straddles my thighs, his cock brushing mine.