Chapter 5
5
Sloane Elizabeth’s Voice Memo to Self on ONE PARTICULAR THING
Okay, so we’ve established a few things now.
You clearly don’t have the antidote yet to the too-sexy-hot-sweet-seductive-clever-witty old flame. Find that. Like, now. Get on that, right away.
But take a deep breath.
All in all, you did fine.
Well, maybe fine isn’t the right adjective. Fine is a B-minus. Your grade was more like a C on the test of self-restraint. Actually, a D-plus. A D-plus says you sucked . . . but you sucked with style.
The only reason you didn’t fail is that you didn’t completely reveal every single detail of your rich inner life when it comes to that man.
Why don’t you just tell him he inspired a pair of socks you designed too? The ones with the words You’re Irresistible and You Know It on them .
Just keep that tidbit close to the chest, okay?
Maybe you should make a new pair for yourself— Resist. Resist Harder This Time.
It's not a huge deal that you revealed you stalk him. And hey, he keeps tabs on you too. You’re just a couple of stalkers.
And damn, that stalker can kiss.
We’re talking the weak-in-the-knees, flip-of-the-belly, tingles-down-the-arms style of smooching.
Just don't do it again.
Also, you’re out of milk. Get some at the store, along with Cinnamon Life cereal. Sublimate with that. Tastes just as good as a hot kiss.
’Kay, thanks, bye. You’re awesome, self.