Chapter 52
Anu-Ms K
Daniel has kept me in bed for the last few days. I guess it’s safe to say he doesn’t like it when I travel. He traveled to New York yesterday and returned late, curling up to me in bed.
The only time I wake up before Daniel is when we haven’t had sex. He came in late and was probably tired.
I stare at the kettle, watching water boil and his coffee is brewing.
A new tune hums in my head. I smile, letting it flow.
This is going to be good. I’m happy. I can feel it in my bones.
I’m a happy woman in a loving relationship.
Despite how Daniel drives me crazy sometimes, with his tidiness and his controlling behavior, I still love to be with him.
The kettle whistles and I take it off and pour the hot water into the mug. Blackcurrant is my choice today. While the tea brews, the coffee is done. I smile and add his cream and sugar; the way he likes it. I’m officially domesticated.
I hear the door as he comes out of the room and I smile, but he’s holding his phone and glaring at me. He’s usually disoriented, but something is wrong. His movement towards me is steady, but his eyes are angry. His whole being looks scary. Something is wrong.
“What the fuck is this, Anu?” He shouts
His angry growl scares me. I take a step back as he charges towards me.
He turns his phone to me, and I look. Horror and mortification shoot through my body.
My eyes must be deceiving me, because the pictures are me, and I’m naked in Teni’s arm.
That can’t be real. I look up at him, hoping this is some kind of mystery or inappropriate prank, but his eyes are blazing.
The anger emanating from him is ravenous. I shriveled up.
His glare tells me all I need to know. He swipes the screen, and each picture is of me naked and Teni clothed.
His hands are all over me: my breast, between my legs.
The acidic taste of bile forms in throat.
I push the phone away and rush to the garbage bin.
I threw up immediately. My brain can’t form words.
“You fucking lied to me,” he yells.
I wipe my mouth.
“It… can’t… be… me,” I garbled, raising my head. My stomach is churning again.
“It is you, and don’t you dare tell me it’s AI, because this is you and Teni, your ex-boyfriend. The guy you promised me I should never worry about.” His angry tone and glare scares me.
“Please, Daniel. I didn’t do anything with Teni. That can’t be me,” I plead when I find my voice.
“I know your body; every corner, every angle and every inch of your body.” He roars, knocking the hot tea and coffee off the counter. The mugs and hot liquid splashes to the floor. My favorite mug, broken. I step further back, scared.
“You must have had a good laugh behind my back while you fucked him in Canada. You probably thought I would never find out,” he yells rage emanating from him
“I didn’t betray us, I swear to you, Daniel. I didn’t sleep with Teni.” My voice trembles with fear.
He looks like he wants to rip me apart. I see betrayal in his eyes, in his whole being.
“Explain the fucking pictures to me then,” he bellowed.
“I can’t….” I answer. “I don’t know how that happened.” I shrivel to the corner, crying.
“I know, you fucked him and lied to me.” He glares at me. “We are done,” he says quietly but the anger behind each word is felt.
My body trembles at his words.
“Please, Daniel, you don’t mean that. I beg you, please. I didn’t do this. I don’t know how this happened. I swear to you. I didn’t have sex with Teni.”
I step closer, stepping on the hot liquid and try to grab his arm. He knocks my hand off him.
“Do not fucking touch me, ever,” he sneers at me, his voice a deep growl of menace. "We are done for good," he says with a finality that terrifies me, before walking away.
I can’t control the tears and trembles in my body.
My mind is a mess. I don’t know what to do.
He emerges from the bedroom in casual clothes and moves past me, silent.
The door slams shut, a loud deafening sound, the final punctuation mark on our relationship.
“We are done.” His words hammer through my being.
The shrill ring of my phone cuts through the silence, but I remain sprawled on the floor, unable to move or answer the call. The ringing sound vibrates, but I remain lost in my position, unable to process what just happened. The ringing stops and I’m still in the same position.
I hear a knock on the door. Hope rises in me.
He came back. I get off the floor and race to the door, flinging it open, hoping to see Daniel, but it’s a delivery guy, handing me an envelope.
I sign for the envelope, and close the door.
I’m not eager to find out what’s in the envelope.
I look out the window and don’t see Daniel’s car.
“He’s really gone.” A new set of tears starts to fall.
I decided to open the envelope that has no return address, just my name on it.
Taking the content out, my whole being is stunned in shock as the pictures fall on the floor.
Each picture in high resolution of me in a compromised state with Teni half-naked.
I’m naked in every single one and Teni is all over me.
His mouth on my nipples. I drop to the floor, gathering the pictures.
Then, I see it. A note that feels like lead in my hand.
I read.
Anu,
Break up with that white boy or an envelope gets mailed to your father, your brother and all your students. We have a record of them all.
Talk soon.
I drop the note and pictures like they are on fire.
But seeing them scattered on the floor is worse.
I gather the papers and pictures, stuffing them back inside the envelope.
Racing to my bedroom, I raise my mattress and place the envelope there and drop the mattress.
I pull a legging from my closet and put a T-shirt on.
I return to get my phone and call for a ride to Nkem’s place.
I’m downstairs, waiting for the ride when it arrives.
I keep wiping each tear as it falls. How did my life go from happy to worst nightmare in minutes?
I fight to not breakdown. When the car pulls up in front of Nkem’s building, I race out.
By the time I make it to her door, the tears are flowing uncontrollably.
She pulls me in without question and hugs me tight. I can’t stop crying. We sit on her sofa and I hysterically let the tears out
“What’s wrong? What happened?” Nkem asks.
“Dan…iel broke up with me,” I answer through tears that I can’t control.
“What? But he loves you, and you love him. How—”
“It doesn’t matter anymore, he said we are done.”
My body shudders with the pain my heart feels. I can’t go on without him. I want to die. Nkem lets me lie on the sofa and I cry hysterically. How do I live without Daniel? How is it possible to go on without Daniel? How repeats like a broken record in my head.
Nkem brings me lunch and I just stare at it and turn away from it. My heart and soul are shattered. She repeatedly asks what caused our break-up, but I can’t bring myself to tell her. Each time I think about it, tears flow. She stops asking and continues to push food my way.
“You should eat something, Anu, or you might get sick.”
I turn away from her and just pull my knee to my chest and let my heart shatter into pieces that could never be put together.
The pain in my bones starts to build, but I hold it in. For the first time, I want it to take over. Sharp pain surges through my body. I shut my eyes, holding in the pain that’s torturing me.
“Anu, are you in pain?” she asks, knowing all the signs.
I shake my head, holding the pain in.
“You are lying. It’s clear on your face that you are in pain. Where is your medication?”
“I don’t have it with me,” I murmur.
“We can go to your place and get it.”
“No!” I answer just as another surge of pain charges through me. I can’t hold it in anymore, I cry out loud.
“Anu!” Nkem gets closer to me but I put my hand out to stop her. “Let’s go to the hospital.”
“No!” I want this to end me. At some point, severe pain may cause a stroke, then I won’t feel a thing.
I continue to scream in pain—pain so strong that I can’t move, just my eyes rolling.
Nkem is yelling at me that we should go to the hospital and all I can think of is: why is it taking long for my life to end?
If I die, I die with my shame and a broken heart.
Daniel can live his life without me. Another surge charges through me, making me scream out loud.
“That’s it, you have cried for hours and have been in pain just as long. I’m calling 911.”
“No! Please, let me die.”
She walks away and before long, the paramedics come in. I refuse to take meds but agree to go to the hospital.
“Call Jordan,” I shout to Nkem. “I need to say goodbye.”
Getting to the hospital, Nkem tells them how long I have been suffering. I still refuse to take any medication. The doctors urge me, and I tell them I don’t want any medication even as I scream and cry through the excruciating pain.
“Let me die, please,” I say to the doctor.
“Why?” he asks, not moved by my request.
“My heart won’t break anymore, and everyone can go back to their lives.”
“Is that why you are refusing your meds? Because you want your broken heart to stop?”
“Yes, please. Just let me go.” He pats my hand, nods and leaves.
More pain charges through me. I scream out even as my throat hurts from all the hours of pain and cries. “MAK, please take your meds!” Jordan pleads.
“No, just let me go.” I take his hand. “Daniel broke up with me and I do not wish to be here anymore.” I mumble through pain.
“I need you here, MAK. Please, take the meds,” he pleads. I see tears in his eyes.
“MAK, please!” I hear Andrea and Nkem as well.
“No, I called you so I could say goodbye.” His frown is immediate.
“MAK, please stay for me.” I shake my head and fight the excruciating pain that’s passing through my body
The doctor returns. “This meds will help knock you out,” he says.
I nod, letting him inject me with the meds, holding Jordan’s hands.
“She will sleep for a while,” I hear the doctor say.