36. Kyle
KYLE
For the first time at any family event, the noise was just a little too much.
Kyle had expected it, of course. Elle had just come home from the hospital three days ago, and the invasion of Winnicks and Camdens and Scotts had begun the moment Elle had gone into labor.
Liddy and Callum had flown over the day that Jude was born, and Liddy had gone straight to the hospital so she could be the first to hold her new nephew.
They were staying here with Mom and Dad, who were also watching Charlotte and Tara.
And while Aiden and Isla had also come from London and had wisely chosen to stay at a hotel, they’d come to Mom and Dad’s for dinner tonight too—to spend time with everyone, especially their nieces.
The only ones missing were Elle and Quinn and baby Jude, since the whole family wanted to give them a few days to adjust to the new routine without the girls.
But what Kyle hadn’t expected?
How poignantly he’d feel Granny’s absence in the midst of the chaos.
And how much he missed Sloan.
He stepped onto the back patio of the house, sliding the door closed behind him. He breathed out, letting the noise fade as his hand tightened around the neck of the beer Callum had handed him a half hour earlier. He’d only taken a few sips of it.
The patio furniture was hot to the touch as he sat on it, sinking into the plush cushions. Maybe it was that everyone here was paired off with their significant other.
Maybe it was that it’d been like that for a while, actually, and that had often left Kyle sitting with Granny. She’d joke that he was her date. Her beau— even though she’d had a boyfriend in her nursing home the last few years.
Or maybe it was that over the last little while, Sloan had been such a significant part of his life that he hadn’t noticed how much he’d come to rely on her for company.
Either way, neither of them was here.
And, once again, Sloan wasn’t doing the best job communicating.
He didn’t want to push. Didn’t want to demand that she pay attention to him, especially when he knew she was legitimately busy—not only getting tests and being poked and prodded in the hospital but also because they had just started wading into the waters of a new phase of their relationship when she’d left for San Francisco.
Yet, when he closed his eyes at night, all he could picture was Sloan eight years earlier, screaming at him to get out.
He’d tried to distract himself—hung out with Jeremy and Brandon, thrown himself into getting his show off the ground, played video games online with Dean . . . and hit the gym. Hard.
Because he’d decided he couldn’t afford to turn Blue Ridge down.
The money was a factor, of course, but more than that—he needed to do this.
To prove once and for all, to everyone, that he could stand on his own two feet again.
Not just financially but also independently.
Because, out of all the things he’d lost over the winter, his reputation and his autonomy had been the hardest.
And getting it back had been even harder because everyone—his family, his friends, and potential sponsors—viewed him from a different lens now.
He didn’t want to be reckless.
But he had to do this. For himself.
So, if Blue Ridge wanted him to race in the Teton SkyRun, so be it.
It wasn’t like they were asking him to win it. And he had four and a half months to train. He hadn’t worked up the courage to tell Wanda about it yet, but he’d be doing that tomorrow at PT, and then at his next appointment with his surgeon.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Isla asked from behind him.
Kyle shifted, looking back to see her stepping out onto the porch.
She couldn’t know, of course, that the name Penny had any significance to him at the moment, or that his mind immediately drifted to Sloan, or that he wasn’t really in the mood to share—but Isla had always been a good friend, and he wasn’t about to send her away now.
“I was thinking that it’s loud in there,” he said with a wry smile, pointing back to the house. “I’m not sure why everyone is hanging around in there rather than out here.” The afternoon was gorgeous—hot, but that wasn’t unexpected for a Sunday in late August.
“Probably because of the air-conditioning.” Isla waved her hand in front of her face and plopped down beside him. “But they’re not beach bums like us. Speaking of which, we missed you at La Hacienda this year. Didn’t feel the same without you. How’s the shoulder doing?”
“It’s . . . fine.” Kyle leaned back, rolling it just a bit. Truthfully, he’d been experiencing more pain since he’d started training for the SkyRun, but it was what it was.
Isla eyed him, then pulled an elastic from her wrist and started tying up her pink-streaked brown hair. “Said with zero confidence.”
He grimaced, kneading the tight muscles above his bad shoulder. “If I tell you something, do you promise not to tell anyone else?”
She frowned. “A secret? You know I can keep a secret. The real question is, should I? Because I’m assuming the people you want me to keep this from are your family.”
“I’m planning on telling them. I just . . . need to figure out how.”
“Is this about the ex-girlfriend I keep hearing about?”
“Sloan? Nope.” He wouldn’t even want to attempt to discuss that unless someone cornered him. Compared to the topic of Sloan, anything about his shoulder seemed simple.
“Okay, fine. But don’t make me your secret keeper for long. Oh.” Isla sat straighter. “And I get to tell Aiden. Because not telling your spouse things gets complicated.”
“That’s fine, I trust Aiden.” Kyle turned toward her more squarely.
“Anyway, my shoulder . . . is currently hurting a little because I’ve started training for a winter race in the Tetons in January.
A potential sponsor, Blue Ridge Sports, is offering me funding for three episodes of my new show, plus gear, travel, and funding for two more episodes for the race they’re sponsoring. ”
Isla’s lack of immediate response made Kyle painfully aware of just how crazy it might sound. He focused his attention on the high-pitched chirp of cicadas, the distant hum of a lawn mower, and the slow trickle of sweat down his brow.
“Well, say something.”
Isla shifted with discomfort. “Is that safe?”
“I’m hoping.”
“What did your surgeon say?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t asked him yet.”
“God, Kyle,” Isla breathed. She grimaced, her nose wrinkling. “You’re coming off a really serious injury, you know that, right?”
“I do.” This wasn’t going much worse than he’d imagined.
But if Isla was this worried, he could only imagine how his sisters would react.
“Look.” He considered his words carefully, then went on.
“I never set out to be an adventure travel influencer or show host. You know that better than anyone. But I like it better than anything else I’ve ever done.
The thought of sitting behind a desk again makes me want to stick a fork in my eyes.
And getting sponsors, especially significant ones like this, hasn’t been easy. ”
Isla pressed her lips together. After a moment, she sighed. “Yeah, Davy mentioned you’d face an uphill battle with that.” She kicked off her flip-flops, drawing her legs up underneath her, tucking them to the side. “Did any of your old sponsors show any interest in partnering with you again?"
“Not really. I’m pretty sure they think of me as a damaged brand they have no interest in touching.”
“It doesn’t help that a political figure was the one dragging your name through the mud.
Corporations don’t like getting pulled into things like that if they can avoid it.
” She tapped her fingers against her thigh.
“Maybe you can find a way to prove you had nothing to do with that whole mess other than being a good person. Or have Sloan help you with that.”
“She can’t. She signed an NDA.”
“Oh . . .” Isla winced. “That’s unfortunate.”
“Yeah, well, as you said, her ex is a person of influence. And a dick. So at this point, my best bet is to start over.”
“Maybe . . . but starting over shouldn’t mean something that could compromise your shoulder and well-being.”
“I’ll be fine. The race isn’t until January. I have plenty of time to train.”
She was silent again for a few beats. “If you really believed that, wouldn’t you be telling your friends and family about it without worry?”
“Tomas knows. And I told my buddy Jeremy because he’s helping me train. And Dean, because I need a partner to race with.”
“And . . . what does Sloan think?”
Kyle shifted in his seat. “I haven’t told her yet either.”
Isla’s eyes met his. “Hmm.”
Great.
“That’s a very judgy hmm .”
“It’s not.” She reached over and squeezed his forearm. “It’s a concerned one. You’re a good guy, Kyle, but I’m worried about you. You don’t seem to think enough about the long-term consequences of how things like these could hurt you. Just be careful, will you?”
I’m fine.
“I’ll be okay, I promise. I’m not taking risks without thinking about it. And I can handle it.”
“Can you, though?”
He nodded.
“And . . . if you can’t handle it. If you realize it’s a mistake or you bit off more than you can chew, will you be willing to admit that? Possibly even quit? You don’t have to answer that. Just think about it. Because if the answer isn’t a resounding yes, then you really should reconsider.”
Kyle cocked a grin at her. “Thanks, bonus sis.” The outdoors no longer felt like a break, but he didn’t want to hurt Isla’s feelings. He stood. “Come on. Let’s get back to the chaos.”
Isla stood slowly, but as she did, he caught the flicker of doubt in her face.
That’s not a good thing.
Because he couldn’t convince his family he was capable of this, how could he convince sponsors to take a chance on him?
. . . or am I just fooling myself?