Chapter Ten
Baby.
He called my sister baby.
Just like Evan used to call me. “You were meant to take my cock, baby.” I want to throw up.
What the hell is happening right now? I force out thoughts of Evan with a shake of my head and focus on Destiny.
The fucker steals another quick kiss and then tells her goodbye. She and I both remain quiet until his tires crunch over the snow as he leaves. Finally, she turns to face where I’m standing in the yard.
“Is there a reason you’re lurking in the dark and intimidating my date?”
My chest tightens. “Uncle Atticus said he needed to have you home by ten. I told him I’d wait up for you out here.”
“Did he tell you to scare him away too? You know what, never mind. He did. So embarrassing.”
He actually didn’t, but I’ll let her paint him the villain instead of me. I’m already feeling villainous enough.
“Can we talk?” I ask, voice rough with distress.
“Are you going to be weird or can we talk like old times?”
Before this trip, everything was good for us. We got so close. Being kidnapped and assaulted broke her. I’d been the one to find her and was there for her as she tried to heal.
Everything changed when she cut herself.
Now we’re here and things are definitely weird.
“I’m going inside. It’s cold, Rowdy.”
I follow her into the cabin. The front is dark aside from a light in the kitchen. Destiny, after having already mastered the layout of their cabin, easily makes her way to Wild’s room without bumping into anything. Like I’m her shadow, I creep along behind her.
Once inside the bedroom, I close the door behind me and take in the space. Beside her bed is a vase of pink roses. They’re pretty, but I hate them because they came from Weston.
It’s almost like you’re jealous…
I scrub my palm over my face and watch as Destiny sheds her coat. She’s wearing fitted jeans and a baggy black sweater that falls off one shoulder, exposing too much skin in my opinion.
“You wanted to talk,” she says softly. “Talk.”
I prowl over to her, unable to take my eyes from her bare shoulder. “Can I sit?”
She nods and sits on the edge of the bed. “Yep.”
Now that I have permission, I don’t know that it’s the best idea. Last time we were on a bed together alone… Fuck. Get your shit together, man.
I fight past the awkwardness and plop down beside her. She busies herself with untying her boots. A hiss of breath escapes her as she pulls one off. Her white sock is stained with blood.
“What happened?” I demand.
“Blisters. We went ice skating.”
“I’ll be right back.”
By the time I return with a first aid kit, Destiny has changed into her sleepwear. The T-shirt swallows her small frame, the material hitting her just above her knees.
Why did she have to get undressed?
I kneel down in front of her, focusing on her bloodstained socks instead of her flawless, smooth legs. She winces when I peel off one of the socks. Her foot is red and swollen, bleeding in places.
“Why would he take you some place you could get hurt?” I demand, nostrils flaring.
“It’s fine,” she assures me. “I had fun.”
Her foot is so tiny in my massive hands. Sickness roils in my gut when I think about how helpless she was when I’d touched her in my sleep. She’s no match for a man like me.
“I fucked up,” I croak out as I start unwrapping Band-Aids. “I didn’t know.”
“I know. I don’t blame you. You shouldn’t either.”
“I’ll never drink again.”
Never. Fucking never.
“Rowdy…” She sighs heavily. “You’re being too hard on yourself.”
Too hard? I wish I could beat myself with a whip until my flesh is flayed open and all this shame seeps out of me.
“I’m sorry.” I swallow down the bile in my throat. “Please forgive me.”
“I already have. Forgive yourself, Rowdy. For me.”
Never.
“I’ll try,” I lie.
We both grow quiet as I finish up one foot and move on to the other. So many blisters on her tiny feet. It makes me want to carve matching ones into Weston’s feet. Of all the things he could take her to do, did he need to do the one that makes her bleed?
“I’m happy right now,” she says, smiling. “The clinic, Weston and Gwen, dating. It’s all so exciting. I needed this.”
I don’t want to stop caring for her, but her feet are all bandaged up.
“I’m happy you’re happy.” It’s true. Seeing her smile is better than seeing her cry. “I’m sorry I keep acting like an asshole around him.”
She absently reaches out, touching my head. Her fingers dance down the side until she’s cupping my cheek. “It’s not just you. Aunt Eve nearly murdered him in the grocery store.”
I close my eyes, leaning into her sweet, gentle touch. “I don’t feel so bad then.”
“He knows Wild. They go to college together but aren’t friends for some reason.”
Knowing Wild, he tried to fuck him. I’m definitely going to ask him about it later.
“This guy’s really good to you?”
“He really is.”
“And the kiss…”
She bites on her bottom lip, drawing my attention there. I was right. Her mouth is supple. More than Lila’s and a lot more alluring that Maxton’s. I’m sick, though, for thinking it’s sexy.
Dez is my sister.
And she likes this Weston guy.
What am I doing right now?
Her foot is in my hands and her hand is on my face. I’m kneeling before her as though I’m begging for attention. I was supposed to apologize for a drunken, stupid night where I didn’t know what I was doing.
But I am completely sober right now, aching for her touch and staring at her pretty mouth.
“The kiss,” I say again roughly. “You liked it?”
“It was nice.”
Kisses with Evan were never “nice.” They were hot and passionate and desperate. But we were also explosive in the worst possible way. Maybe Weston is good for her because he’s a gentle man who treats her like a princess.
I hate to admit it, but this guy could be good for her. Nice. Destiny needs nice.
Her phone rings on the bed beside her, announcing Weston’s name to her. A smile tugs at her lips. “I should take this.”
My heart thuds heavily in my chest. I’m being pushed away so she can talk to the man who calls her “baby.” This is a good thing. What she wants and needs.
“Yeah, okay.” I rise to my feet. “Maybe we can hang out tomorrow or something.”
“Sure.” She answers the phone, grinning. “Hold on. Let me grab my earbuds.”
Like a sick voyeur fuck, I watch as she crawls over to her nightstand where they’re plugged in.
When I get a flash of her naked thighs, I force my eyes away from them, ignoring the hot pulsing in my jeans.
She pops the earbuds in and starts whispering to him.
I shamelessly stare at her as she wiggles under the blanket.
What is my problem?
It’s like I’m obsessed with her all of the sudden.
I don’t fucking understand.
I’ve just promised no more alcohol, but I ache to go back to the RV and drown myself in numbing liquor. But what if she came to me again? Could I control myself? Would I accidentally fuck my sister while black-out drunk?
Then I’d be just like Jace.
A sick fucking rapist.
“Rowdy? You still in here?”
I creep out of the room, softly closing the door behind me. When I turn around, I nearly run over Aunt Eve. She narrows her eyes at me as though she can see inside my head.
“She’s talking to Weston,” I whisper. “Her feet had blisters. I bandaged her up.”
For some reason, I sound guilty as hell.
“Leave,” Aunt Eve says, pointing at the door. “Bye.”
I don’t have to be told twice. My feet feel two sizes too big and I stumble over them on my way out the door.
I’m grateful for the icy cold wind to knock some sense into me.
I’m halfway to the RV when I freeze mid-step.
Unable to control myself, I look toward the window to the room Destiny is in.
The shades are open and her bedside lamp illuminates her inside.
Go to bed, man.
I try to force my feet forward, but I end up turning and darting over to the shadowed side of the house where her window is.
She can’t see me, so I don’t have to worry about getting caught.
I step closer until my nose touches the cold glass, holding my breath so it doesn’t fog up the window, hiding her from me.
This is sick.
Not sick. I’m just protecting her. Making sure she’s okay.
Keep telling yourself that lie.
I stare, unmoving like a frozen stalker statue, eyes glued to my little sister in her bed.
She’s so innocent and unaware of the monster lurking outside her window.
Her mouth is so fucking pretty when she smiles.
Weston must be the most hilarious fucking guy on the planet because she continually laughs while on the phone with him.
It reminds me of my own phone.
I pull it out and navigate to the camera. It’s not weird to take a picture of your sister. She’s family. That’s what family does.
I’m dizzy from trying to convince myself this is okay and not at all twisted.
Zooming in on her mouth is a bad idea and yet I do it anyway, taking several pictures of it. Finally, I force myself away, dragging through the snow and into the RV.
“Hey,” Wild greets, glancing up from his FaceTime call. “You good?”
“Yup.” I tear off my coat and kick off my snowy boots. “Night.”
I stalk into the bedroom, nearly taking the door off the rollers when I yank it aside. Once in the safety of my room, I strip down naked, phone in hand, and sprawl out on my back.
Don’t do it.
Don’t fucking do it.
I curl my hand around my throbbing dick and give it a punishing squeeze. The app Wild installed on my phone earlier today calls to me. It’s a porn app. I quickly navigate to it and do a search for men at first, anything to take my mind off my sister.
But then I find myself searching for petite blondes.
Sicko.
And when the gorgeous women on the app don’t do it for me, I switch back to my camera roll.
Her mouth. I can’t get it out of my head.
Stroking my dick, I stare at it, wishing her lips were on my crown.
I bet her tongue is soft and slick. She’d probably give it a tentative, unsure lick that would drive me wild.
I’d ache to snatch a handful of her pretty hair and force her to take my cock like a good girl.
Holy shit.
I’ve lost my fucking mind.
I pull my hand from my dick long enough to spit on it and get it slick, then I fuck my fist in earnest, wishing for something I can never ever have.
Her mouth.
Her pussy.
Her ass.
It’s not enough. My hand is too rough, too big, too masculine. I ache for softness. Her softness.
No. No. Fuck, no.
Rolling onto my stomach, I bite into the pillow that still smells like her and grind my hips.
I can almost pretend she’s here and I’m fucking her.
Would she like it?
A moan rasps out of me and my nuts tighten. I come, soaking my hand and the blanket beneath me. My heart is hammering wildly in my chest.
Still, it’s not enough.
There’s only one thing that will satisfy me and it’s her.
How in the hell am I going to get her out of my head?
A dark thought passes over me.
I know exactly how.
It nearly killed me once before.
Don’t do it…
My heart fills with thunderous resolve. It’s the only way to protect my sister from my perverse desires.
I need to see Evan.