Chapter Twenty
Holy fuck.
My phone buzzes in my jeans pocket, but I don’t want to grab it. But since it’s obvious it’s Destiny calling me, I hurry to answer it.
“Hello?” I keep my voice a low whisper since I’m standing outside her window like a creeper.
“Hey.” The breathy sounds she makes have my cock jolting in my jeans.
“What are you up to?” I ask, knowing full and damn well what.
“Just getting ready for bed. You?”
“Trying to relax so I can sleep.” Not a total lie.
She yawns and is quiet for a second. From my vantage point outside the window, I see her hand is no longer in her panties but resting on her bare stomach.
Her shirt was pushed up with all her squirming as she came.
Even though it’s cold as fuck outside, I can’t help myself. I unzip my jeans and pull my dick out.
If anyone saw me doing this, it would be so fucking bad.
Luckily, Wild fell asleep and I’m assuming everyone in the cabin, aside from Destiny, is asleep.
“I had a good time today,” she murmurs. “We should have more days like today.”
Where you finger yourself in front of me, little sister?
“I agree,” I rumble. “I love being with you.”
She’s quiet again. I try to steady my breathing as I stroke my cock.
“What are you doing right now?” she asks. “You’re breathing heavily.”
I bite down on my bottom lip. “Nothing.”
“Sounds like you’re pretty happy doing nothing.”
I swear to fuck it’s as if she can see me.
“Very happy,” I growl, squeezing my dick. “So fucking happy.”
“Do you think Aunt Eve and Uncle Atticus would let me stay in the RV with you?”
My mind drifts to filthy images of her naked beneath me as I fuck her hard.
“No,” I choke out. “Never.”
“I’ve slept in your bed lots of times before,” she says with a pout. “Alone with you in your cabin.”
But that was before. When she was just my little sister. Now everything is different. I want inside of her so bad I can’t stand it. I want to mark her as mine. I don’t want her out of my sight. I need to fucking taste her.
“You’re all grown up now,” I rumble. “They might think we’re doing things we shouldn’t.”
“Like what?”
She’s taunting me and I love it.
“You know what, Dez.”
“Like kissing?”
I groan, jacking my hand harder and faster. “More than that.”
“Fucking.”
The filthy word on her tongue does it for me. I come with a soft groan, shooting cum all over my hand and the side of the cabin.
“Yeah, fucking.” I shake my cock, flinging cum all over the place. “They wouldn’t like that.”
“Aunt Eve is already worried about that.”
I freeze at her words. “What?”
“Her brothers and dad…” She trails off. “You know.”
I do know. Dad told me the story long ago. They raped her and impregnated her multiple times. She never could carry those babies to term. They’re buried not far from my cabin near our homestead.
“What did she say?”
“Be careful.”
Because of me?
I mean, you are standing outside her window, beating your meat, asshole.
“Fuck.” I shove my messy cock back into my jeans and zip up. “I wouldn’t do that, Dez. You know that.”
Which part? Touch her? Already did. Fuck her? Want to really bad. I’m a liar.
“I know you wouldn’t hurt me,” she murmurs. Then she jolts upright. “I hear someone talking. I need to go to bed.”
I swear she makes a shooing motion with her hand toward the window.
Did she know I was here? Is that why she put on that show? For me?
My mind reels with all sorts of crazy shit as I scramble to get back to the RV before I’m caught. I’m sneaking back in when she speaks again.
“Today was fun, Rowdy. I love you.”
She hangs up, but I say it anyway. “I love you too.”
I go to bed with a stupid grin on my stupid face.
This is so bad.
I’m going insane.
This morning, Weston picked Destiny up to take her to the clinic, and I’ve been burning with jealousy ever since.
Was last night meant to tease me?
Or did I imagine all of it?
Destiny has Weston, and she clearly likes him, and I’m over here wishing it were me she wanted instead.
It. Can’t. Happen.
What would Dad do if he knew I jerked off outside her window last night?
He’d string me up by my cock and beat me.
Because. It’s. Wrong.
Maybe I could plead my case. That I love her. She loves me too.
Like a brother. Because you are.
Fuck.
Someone beats on the RV door and I jolt from my mental anguish. Uncle Atticus pops his head inside, and Scout pushes past him and jumps onto my bed. I can’t even look at Uncle Atticus. Guilt is drowning me. Certainly, he’ll see it in my eyes.
“Told Evan we’d meet him up at the gym. You need to get out and do something. You’re going stir-crazy.”
What?
I shoot him a panicked look. “I have nothing to wear.”
“Wear something of Wild’s. We leave in five.”
Where the fuck is Wild?
I dig around through his shit until I find some sweats and a T-shirt, then text him.
Me: where are you man you’re dad’s making me go to gym with evan fuck at least i did the right you’re this time dickhead
Wild: Your. No you didn’t. And I’ll meet you there. Went to see my uncle. I’ll tell you about it later.
As promised, five minutes later, we’re on the way to the gym. The thought of seeing Evan again has my stomach twisting into a tight knot. The only saving grace is Wild will meet me there. Maybe he’ll punch Evan again. Last time didn’t leave any bruising, unfortunately.
My phone buzzes as we roll through the heart of the small downtown area.
evan knox dont answer him: We’re lifting weights. Alex left badges for you and Uncle Atticus up front. See you soon, Row.
I’m regretting not letting Destiny block his number. I fumble around on the phone, searching for how to do that, but accidentally end up FaceTiming him instead. With a curse, I mash the end button as soon as he answers.
“Trouble with your phone?” Uncle Atticus asks, chuckling.
More like trouble with his nephew…
Sometimes I just want to blurt out all the things Evan did.
But something always holds me back. Evan loves his uncle and his uncle loves him.
Despite everything that man inflicted on me, I can’t be the one to ruin his relationship with his uncle.
Wild has always hated his cousin, so knowing just gives him reason to hate him more.
I can’t do it to Uncle Atticus.
“Our badges are up at the front desk,” I say with a grunt. “Wild is meeting us up here.”
“Good,” Uncle Atticus says. “I know school starts back up soon. We won’t see him as much after that.”
I’m guessing Wild hasn’t told his dad yet he wants to quit.
The gym is in a small building. There won’t be any avoiding Evan here. Nowhere to run. I follow Uncle Atticus into the building and take the badge from him after he grabs them. Someone whistles at us and then I see Evan sauntering our way. He gives his uncle a bear hug and then he hugs me next.
His scent, familiar and something I once loved, makes my nostrils burn. Everywhere he touches hurts. It’s as if his skin is made of acid and it’s seeping its way to my veins in a desperate attempt to my heart.
I can’t move to shake him off and I certainly don’t reciprocate. All I do is stand there, frozen like a deer in headlights as this man rubs his palms up and down my back.
Flashes of being fucked up on heroin and him pushing inside me despite my pleas not to assault my brain. Bile creeps up my throat. My eyes burn like tears want to form, but I refuse to let them. I bite into my tongue so hard I taste metal from the blood I draw.
Finally, Evan releases me. My skin is cold and I can’t keep from trembling. Alex shakes Uncle Atticus’s hand and then he offers his hand to me.
I want to grab it and ask, “Does he rape you too?”
Instead, I quickly shake Alex’s hand, eager to let go as soon as possible.
“What happened to your arm?” Uncle Atticus asks, gesturing at the gauze on Alex’s arm.
I’m instantly on guard. Is he hiding something? Track marks? Did Evan lie about being clean? Reluctantly, I drag my gaze over to Evan, who’s staring at me. His eyes are clear and intense. Not hazy and drugged. Alex too is alert.
“Snagged it on a nail,” Alex grumbles. “Evan thinks I need a tetanus shot.”
A stupid nail?
Alex jumps into trainer mode and shows us around the gym, explaining some of the complicated machines. Evan stays glued to my side, flashing me secret smiles that used to unravel me.
If I thought I was going to obsess over Destiny all day, I was wrong.
Evan truly is the only person in the world who has this control over my mind. I’m a hostage to him every damn time.
“Hey, fuckface,” a voice barks out from behind me. “Still ugly, I see.”
Wild comes out of nowhere and not-so-playfully punches Evan in the gut.
Evan’s eyes flash with anger, but he quickly schools them, jerking his cousin in for a hug.
They end up on the gym floor, wrestling.
While Alex and Uncle Atticus look on with amusement, I know better.
The two men are each seconds from tearing each other’s throats out.
Finally, Uncle Atticus steps in and yanks them apart.
“Come on,” Wild says to me, pointing at a weight bench. “Spot me.”
Evan glowers at his cousin, but then Alex distracts him. We escape, leaving Wild’s dad with them. As soon as Wild is on the bench, hands on the bar that’s already loaded down with weights, he laughs.
“I hate that motherfucker.”
“Me too.” I shudder because I can still feel Evan’s hands on my back. “Took you long enough to get here.”
He pushes up the bar without effort. We’re both strong, but Wild’s been physically trained because of football. My strength comes from real life shit out in the wild like building cabins from the ground up or hauling a deer carcass.
“Put twenty more on each side,” he instructs, continuing to do his reps.
I find the weights and add them to the bar when he stops. Then he goes back to lifting, this time with more effort needed.
“You going to tell me what you went to see your uncle about?”
I actually like his uncle, Will. But he’s Evan’s dad, so I avoid him too at all costs. Anything to do with Evan gives me fucking hives.
“He asked me if I knew the guy who died,” Wild says with a grunt. “The second one.”
“Did you?”
“Nope, my buddy Chet knew him. You remember Chet?”
Chet’s sister, Sadie, was one of the ones captured by those fuckers who took my family. Of course I know Chet. I nod and wait for him to continue.
“Uncle Will is stressed out. The two homicides were clearly done by the same person and the same method.”
“How?”
“Gash to the throat. Bashed in the face until unidentifiable. Both were sexually assaulted.”
My gut churns. “But they were men.”
Wild shakes his head as if I’m stupid. “Men can get raped too. Even big ones built like a brick house.”
He means me.
I didn’t need the reminder.
“Does he know why?” I ask, unable to keep from darting my eyes over to the man who haunts my dreams.
“No leads. No motive they know of.” Wild gives up on lifting and slides off the bench, gesturing for me to sit. “I told him I can help.”
I take Wild’s place and test the weight. It’s a lot, but I can do it. He stands over me, hands spotting the bar in case I drop it.
“How will you help?” I ask through gritted teeth. “You’re not a cop.”
“But I could be.” He grins down at me.
The thought of anyone willingly giving Wild a gun and handcuffs sounds pretty dangerous to me.
“You’re really thinking about it?”
“Hell yeah.” He smirks at me. “Maybe I’ll arrest my fucked-up cousin as my first matter of business.”
If only it were that easy.