Chapter 21 #2
The study is small and lined with bookshelves, lit only by afternoon light filtering through a single window. I pace the length of it twice before forcing myself to stand still. Three minutes pass before Addison slips inside.
“Delphine set this up?” she asks.
“Apparently.”
She laughs, breathless, and a second passes before she’s in my arms with our mouths sliding together. She tastes like champagne and victory and everything I’m not supposed to want.
“You won,” I say against her lips, so fucking happy.
“I did.” She pulls back far enough to look at me with her eyes shining. “I can’t believe it.”
I brush a strand of hair from her face. “The paintings were gorgeous, Addison. I can’t believe you see me like that. And the note under the chessboard made me smile.”
Her expression softens. “I wondered if you’d see it.”
“I didn’t miss a single detail.” I trace my thumb along her jaw. “You showed them who I am when I’m with you.”
“They loved it.”
“They did. You’re so talented, and I’m so lucky to know you.”
I kiss her fingers and then her mouth before moving to her jaw and then the spot beneath her ear that makes her shiver. As we exist in this space, I believe everything is possible.
She pulls back and looks at me with her face flushed and her eyes bright with happiness. “This is actually going to work. I can feel it.”
I kiss her again because I want to believe her. Right now, in this room, with her taste on my tongue and her hands in my hair and her paintings hanging in the gallery down the hall, I do believe her. I believe we can have this. I believe we can make it work.
The door opens.
My mother stands in the doorway, and the look on her face tells me everything before she says a single word.
“Well,” she says quietly as she steps inside and closes the door behind her, “this explains quite a lot.”
Addison goes rigid in my arms, and I step in front of her without thinking, putting myself between them.
“Mother—”
“Don’t.” She holds up a hand. “You both played me for a fool. Acted as if you didn’t know one another when you’d been meeting for these paintings in secret.”
“It wasn’t a secret,” I tell her. “No one asked.”
My mother exhales a deep breath—something she usually does when she’s trying to keep control of her emotions.
“You know, when I spoke to Tatiana, she told me the reason she behaved the way she did was that she thought you were interested in someone else. It was her last effort to win you over. I assured her she was wrong, but she wasn’t. ”
My hands curl into fists at my sides. “Her last effort to win me over? She cornered me in my office. She put her hands on me after I told her to stop. That’s not desperation, Mother. That’s assault.”
“She was emotional and made a poor decision—”
“She sexually harassed me.” The words come out sharp, and I don’t care. “I filed that complaint because what she did was wrong, and you’re standing here, making excuses for her.”
My mother’s expression flickers, but she recovers quickly. “It was a choice made out of desperation because she could see what I apparently could not.” Her gaze slides past me to Addison. “You’ve been very clever, Miss Cross.”
“Your Majesty, it has nothing to do with cleverness.” Addison’s voice is steady.
“No? You two happened to fall in love, knowing he needs to find a wife? It’s convenient, isn’t it?”
“That’s enough,” I say, taking a step forward. “You will not disrespect her.”
“It’s nowhere near enough.” My mother steps closer with her heels clicking against the floor. “The alliance with Belcova, the council’s plans, your father’s wishes—do you understand what you’re jeopardizing?”
“Yes, I do.”
“Then you understand why this ends right now.” She straightens her shoulders, and I watch her transform from my mother into the queen. “Tatiana will not be sent home. The harassment complaint will be dismissed. The plan continues.”
The words land like a blow to the chest.
“You’re dismissing the complaint.”
“It’s already done.”
“She assaulted me, and you’re protecting her.”
“I’m protecting this family.” My mother’s voice is ice. “Tatiana made a mistake. She apologized. The alliance with Belcova is too important to throw away because you couldn’t handle an overeager woman.”
I stare at her, barely recognizing the person in front of me. “Couldn’t handle—she violated my boundaries. She touched me without my consent. And you’re telling me to marry her?”
“I’m telling you to do your duty.”
“My duty is to marry my harasser?” I laugh, but it’s full of sarcasm. “Do you hear yourself?”
“I hear a crown prince who made promises he now wants to break because he’s infatuated with a painter.
” She steps closer. “You will do what’s required of you, what you promised with your word.
Starting tomorrow, your schedule will be managed by my office.
You will attend every event with Tatiana.
You will be charming and attentive to every new woman who’s introduced to you.
You will choose a princess before the clock strikes midnight, the night of the ball. ”
“And if I refuse?”
“That’s the last thing you want to do.” Her voice doesn’t waver. “Don’t test me, Louis.”
She turns to Addison, and I feel her hand find mine behind my back.
“Miss Cross, I can’t remove you without causing a scandal—first female royal portrait artist, dismissed after one day.
So, you’ll stay. You’ll do your job. And you will never be alone with my son again.
” She pauses at the door with her hand on the frame.
“My husband’s tea is scheduled for Tuesday.
I suggest you enjoy it. It may be the last pleasant conversation you have in this palace.
This ends now. You have five minutes to say your goodbyes. Don’t make me come back here.”
She leaves, and the door clicks shut behind her.
Neither of us moves. I can hear Addison breathing beside me, shallow and fast, and my own pulse hammers in my throat. Ten minutes ago, we were celebrating. Ten minutes ago, everything felt possible. Now we’re standing in the wreckage of it, trying to figure out how to breathe.
“Louis …” Addison’s voice is barely a whisper. “What Tatiana did to you—and now they’re—”
“I know.”
“This isn’t right.”
I pull her against me, holding her tight enough that I can feel her heart racing against my chest. The rage is burning through me, but underneath, it’s something worse.
My own mother told me that what Tatiana did doesn’t matter.
That I don’t matter. That my body, my boundaries, and my consent are secondary to an alliance.
“We fight,” I say into her hair. “I’ll find a way to contact you, even if it’s through Delphine. I’d text you, but it’s being monitored.”
“Okay.” She nods against my chest, her voice muffled. “And when I meet your father—”
“I’ll be there with you. Be yourself. My mother won’t tell him about us. I promise she’ll try to bury this.” I press my lips to her hair. “I already miss you.”
She pulls back and looks at me with her jaw set and her eyes wet. “I’m so sorry. You deserve so much better than this.”
“So do you,” I tell her. “I wish things were different. I wish I weren’t—”
“Don’t say that. I like all of you, okay? Even the shitty royal parts.”
Our mouths crash together, and we kiss like this might be the last time we’re ever together.
“I’m still choosing you,” I whisper to her. “I’ll find a way.”
“Promise?”
“On my grandmother’s grave.”
I want to hold on to her until the end of time, but if we linger any longer, my mother will return with guards, and neither of us needs the attention. I kiss her forehead and force myself to release her. She slips out the door.
“I love you,” I whisper.
I stand alone in the empty study while the afternoon light fades.
My mother thinks she can force my hand. She couldn’t be more wrong.