Chapter 27
Freya
David Bowie croons “Moonage Daydream” in my ear as I plate the beef Wellington on the platter. As I run the blade of my knife along the crust, the satisfying scrape puts a smile on my face.
“Perfect.”
Quickly adding a garnish, one of the servers covers the dish with a cloche and carries it out of the kitchen to carve at the table.
The Wellington was the showstopper, so once it’s gone, I lean against the counter with a sigh of relief. Picking up the rag, I start cleaning. The two assistants I brought with me give each other a high five before congratulating me on a job well done.
“Let’s hope they don’t send anything back,” I say. They both laugh in response.
With this accomplishment under my belt, I look around at the messy kitchen and replay everything we did today. There were only a few minor hiccups, but for the most part, I somehow managed to pull off this job. A full catering job. On my own.
I did that.
Remembering Julian’s words of encouragement, forcing me to recognize that I earned this job, a feeling of pride swells inside me.
Amelia sneaks into the kitchen, beaming. When our eyes meet, she starts to hop up and down in glee. She probably couldn’t care less about catering jobs, but she’s excited for me because that’s just the type of person Amelia is.
“It all looks so stunning, Freya!” she squeals. “You did it!”
She wraps her arms around me, and we hop around the kitchen for a moment. “Are they eating?” I ask.
“They are devouring it, girl. Everything is so delicious.”
“Good,” I reply with satisfaction.
“My mom wants you to come out in a few minutes.”
My eyes widen. “What? Why?”
“To show their appreciation. Duh.”
“I have to clean up in here,” I reply, moving a pan to the sink.
“Absolutely not. Someone else can do that,” she says, taking the pan from my hand. “You worked your butt off all day, and now you deserve to come hang out with us.”
She undresses me, tearing off my caked apron and plucking my earbuds out, throwing it all on the counter.
“Besides,” she says, linking her arm with mine. “Your hunky pilot is out there.”
My feet plant as a nervous energy halts me in my tracks. “Amelia, wait.”
She turns to me in confusion.
“He’s not my hunky pilot,” I say with conviction.
Her brows furrow. “What are you talking about?”
“As far as anyone is concerned, we are just friends,” I say with a tremor in my hands.
“Are you…” she asks. “Just friends?”
I drag in a shaky breath. “I’m not ready,” I stutter, and pity morphs her features.
Pulling me into a hug, she squeezes me tight. “It’s okay if you’re not ready, Freya. I won’t say anything, okay?”
“Thank you,” I mumble as tears prick my eyes.
Releasing me from her hug, she dismisses the whole thing with nonchalance. “Besides, my brother has been out there telling everyone Archer is his boyfriend, so you’re fine.”
Blinking away my tears, this news makes me smile. “He has?”
“Yep. I’m pretty damn proud of him. I never thought I’d see the day he’d admit feelings for another person.”
A laugh bubbles up, and although I’m smiling, I still feel like dirt for not being a part of that equation. I love that Julian is claiming Archer. For the first time, I don’t feel jealous about that.
But it hurts to think that I may never be ready to be so outwardly committed with them both. It’s wrong of me to ask them to wait, especially since I wonder if I’ll ever be ready.
Holding my hand, Amelia drags me out to the dining room where the entire party is stationed around an enormously long table that seats at least thirty people.
The first pair of eyes I find in the room is Julian’s. His face lights up at the sight of me, but it’s the sudden round of applause that fills the space that takes me by surprise.
Archer hoots and hollers embarrassingly, so I cover my face and beg them all to stop.
Amelia’s mom and dad stand up to hug me and thank me for the meal, and it means the world to me.
It’s rare that we ever get recognition like this, but it feels even better to be the one feeding them and their loved ones on their special day.
“Please sit with us,” Daisy says, guiding me toward an empty chair.
“Oh, I’m not dressed properly,” I argue.
“We don’t care about that,” Amelia’s dad replies with a wave of his hand.
Julian scoots over, and someone brings in an extra chair for me. I glance at the end of the table where Amelia sits next to her godfather, the good-looking older man I’ve seen at the club.
The family quickly makes room and welcomes me to their table, which makes me feel only worse that I’m basically avoiding the situation with Archer and Julian.
As I sit down, Julian puts an arm around my shoulder. “This was phenomenal,” he whispers in my ear, and I see the empty plate in front of him.
“You really liked it?” I ask, desperate for a touch of his praise.
“I fucking loved it,” he says. “Everyone did.”
Looking across the table, I see that Archer has almost nothing on his plate and he’s hardly touched it. “And what about you? You’re not eating?”
He shrugs and gives Julian a quick wink. “Not hungry.”
For the rest of the night, the dining room is filled with chatter and laughter. The wine pours freely, and everyone seems so happy, but I can’t seem to shake this feeling of inadequacy.
“Aren’t you going to introduce me to your friend, Julian?” a handsome dark-haired man sitting next to Archer asks.
I turn to the man by my side with his arm around my chair. He rolls his eyes before muttering, “Freya, this is Jack St. Claire. My partner. Jack, this is my girl—”
“Nice to meet you!” I blurt out to interrupt Julian. Thrusting my hand out, I shake the man’s. There’s a pretty blond woman next to him with a little girl on her lap who has her own seat but seems to prefer to be close to the woman.
“Nice to meet you, Freya,” the man says with a playful laugh. He then introduces me to his girlfriend, Camille, and his daughter, Bea. They seem like a perfectly happy family, like they have no secrets to hide from anyone.
This is what my parents want for me. How will they react when I tell them I’m in a relationship that doesn’t look like everyone else’s? Will they take me seriously? Will they put aside their biases and accept us? Am I ready to put my family relationships in jeopardy for Archer and Julian?
Under the table, Julian takes my hand, and I try to force myself to relax. I want to enjoy this. I deserve to enjoy this.
The party moves away from the table after dessert. Julian’s parents mingle with their friends, drinking and celebrating. Archer finds me hovering near the edge of the room. Putting his arm around my back, he pulls me closer, and I try to relax into his touch.
I can do this.
“So Jules and I made a little plan before dinner,” he mumbles to me.
“Oh yeah?” I turn to look up at his handsome face.
“He’s saying his goodbyes now, and we’re going to get out of here.”
“Where are we going?” I ask.
“The club.”
My spine straightens, and my heart picks up speed. Then I feel Archer’s lips against the side of my head.
“Relax, Chef. We’re renting a room. It’ll just be us.”
“I’m fine,” I lie. “What are we going to the club for? Why can’t we just go back to Julian’s?”
He gives me a back-and-forth head tilt. “For fun? Besides…” He presses his lips to my ear and whispers, “I’m going to let him tie me up since he loves it so much.”
Heat pummels my stomach with arousal at the thought of Archer tied up.
“Okay, fine,” I mumble with a smile.
“You’re on board now, aren’t you?”
“Maybe we can gag you too?” I ask, teasing him.
He scoffs, pretending to be offended. “For that, I think we’ll tie you to the spanking bench.”
Burying his face in my neck, he growls, making me squeal. I feel the eyes of one of the guests watching us, and I grow instantly uncomfortable. Pulling away, I watch as Julian finishes up with his parents.
Finally, after another five minutes, he marches over to us. “Okay, let’s get out of here.” Grabbing my hand, he practically drags us out of the party. No one even notices we’re leaving, and I can feel the excitement radiating from both of them.
As we climb into the back of Julian’s car, they put me in the middle. Neither of them can feel my stress, or if they do, they don’t show it. They’re both too excited for the night to come apparently.
The car is quiet during the ride. I changed in Amelia’s room after she let me borrow something other than the black pants and dirty sneakers I cooked in all day.
Now, I’m in a high-necked cotton dress that goes down to my ankles with a slit up to my thigh.
I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt, and with Archer’s hand resting on my bare leg, I’m as excited as they are.
I just have to let go of all the uncertainty.
I have to go back to that moment in the elevator when we all met.
When we clicked so intensely that none of us could walk away.
And now, here we are. Going to a sex club together.
I know deep in my heart there is no way I could go with anyone else.
I trust these two to always keep me safe.
I meant what I said to Julian that day in his apartment. They are my safe space. Sure, I have some deeply rooted reservations about kink, but I want this. I want to overcome those fears and aversions and give in to this desire. With them, I can.
During the ride, Archer’s hand travels slowly up my thigh. Turning toward him, I stare into his eyes as his hand slides up my dress. The pad of his finger caresses my clit over the fabric of my panties, making my eyes flutter closed.
I lean into him as he continues to tease me.
All the while, I feel Julian watching us, his breath heavy with desire.
Every touch with them is like a drug I can’t get enough of.
They are both helping me to shed all this indignity and embarrassment I feel whenever it comes to sex.
With them, I’m not ashamed of my pleasure.
In fact, it’s actually quite…beautiful.