24. One More Truth
24
One More Truth
WINTER
Pushing through the sweaty crowd with Allie, I consider telling her that I don’t feel well and sparing myself while I still can. The last time I drank, Haze had to come and get my wasted ass in a place similar to this one. Everything about this moment is a reminder that tonight, he’s not here to do it. Even worse, he’s the reason I need a night out.
“Let’s get Jell-O shots.” Allie drags me and Kendrick deeper into the clusters of people. She was right. This party was the students’ topic of the week. Posters were hung everywhere in the halls when I went back to empty my locker.
“Come to mama.” Allie stops near the bar and reaches for three of the remaining shots. I throw the cup back as quickly as I can, secretly hoping it’ll make my presence here any less painful.
News flash: it doesn’t.
But what really kills my already weak mood…
Is the sight of Haze sitting on the couch across the room.
Next to him are Vic, a few other guys, and… a blonde. She’s tall, busty, gorgeous, and sitting on the armrest next to him. I can tell from the way she keeps on adjusting her shirt to draw attention to her cleavage that she has every intention of bringing Haze back to her dorm tonight.
I will make her swallow her hair extensions, I swear.
He looks bored out of his mind, shifting uncomfortably and pushing her off every time she attempts to slide on his lap. It’s obvious he’s not interested in her, but she can’t seem to take a hint. When she leans in to whisper something in his ear, he looks up.
And sees me.
Shock flashes in his gaze.
I can’t tell what he’s thinking—or feeling. Is he happy? Surprised? Mad? I’m not asking for a lot. I just need him to feel something. Any trace of emotion will do at this point.
When he peels his eyes away from me and becomes invested in the conversation with Miss Perfect, it feels like my heart is being slowly carved out of my chest.
Indifference.
Cold, hard indifference.
I don’t look away. What’s the point? Watching him flirt with her might be exactly what I need—adose of reality.
He cheated on you. What’s it going to take to get that through your head? Do you need to actually see him fuck her?
Allie’s voice erupts behind me. “Just say the word and I’ll accidentally pour a drink over that girl.”
I shrug. “He’s single. He can do whatever he wants.”
She rolls her eyes. “What? Cut the crap. Everybody knows you were this close to getting back together. He was head over heels in love with you. This makes no sense. You need to call him out on his shit.”
She has a point, I know she does. Does that mean I’m going to have a go at my cheater of an ex-boyfriend while sober? Absolutely not. Allie tells me she’s going to go to the bathroom, and Kendrick follows, which tips me off about what he really intends to do in there. A few minutes slip away. Still no sign of them.
So not cool, cousin.
Haze is still on the couch, downing beer after beer, as I lean back against the wall with crossed arms and watch wasted people dance. Four girls, all bearing drinks, stop next to me, and I step sideways to give them room.
My eyebrows shoot to the ceiling.
Amongst them… is hoop earring girl.
The girl Haze cheated on me with.
She looks right through me. She doesn’t recognize me. Why would she? She doesn’t care that the guy she banged after a night out had someone in his life. She was out to have fun, and I can’t even blame her. The one I should hate is Haze. And I will hate him… In time.
“Holy shit. Who’s that?” The brunette alongside Hoop fans herself.
“Who?’” Hoop says.
“The hottie next to Vic.” Her friend points at Haze.
Of fucking course.
“Oh, new guy,” Hoop figures out.
“Damn,” friend number two agrees. “Is he single?”
“Trust me, you’re going to want to pass on this one.”
“Why?” the brunette questions.
“I know he’s smoking hot and all, but he’s got issues.” Hoop guzzles the contents of a red cup.
“Girl, send him my way. I can deal with his issues anytime.” The brunette smirks, causing her friends to snicker.
“I’m telling you. He and Vic were at the pub the other day, and he came up to me, straight up asked me to go back to his place. I was like Yes, please.”
I wince. I can’t listen to her talk about how she slept with Haze. I just can’t. I give myself a slight push off the wall and start to walk away, but what Hoop says next keeps me in place.
“Then nothing.”
“What do you mean nothing ?” Her friend frowns.
“He literally paid me a hundred dollars to crash at his place and do nothing. Dude wouldn’t even look at me. Like I had a fucking disease or something. Then, in the morning, he just kicked me out at a specific time. It was so sketch, and I lost my favorite earring.”
My heart flips.
“I think he was trying to get some girl off his back. I remember seeing some chick in the hall, but I mean, goddamn, a hundred dollars for someone to take a hint. Just dump her and be done with it.” She cackles.
It’s a wonder my knees haven’t given out when one of them suggests hitting the dance floor and they scatter away.
Baffled, I grip the nearest piece of furniture.
Haze didn’t cheat on me.
Haze didn’t cheat on me.
He paid that girl to be there.
But why? Why would he want me to think he cheated? Why would he bulldoze my heart like this… when we were this close to being together again?
I don’t think twice and make my way over to the couch, barely squeezing through the crowd. Haze seems surprised when he sees me approaching. The blonde girl sees me too and, probably because I look like I’m about to murder someone, she has the good instinct to walk away.
I stop in front of him, hands on my hips, eyes dark as the night. Conversations are cut short as the other guys seated on the couch notice me.
“Hey, beautiful,” some guy says. “Need help with something?”
Vic elbows him and offers me an apologetic smile. At least he’s still decent unlike someone .
“What do you want, Winter?” Haze huffs.
Dark-haired dude tenses up. “Hold on a second. That’s Winter?”
Haze glares at him in response.
So, he’s told them about me.
“What do you want?” Haze repeats.
“We need to talk.”
He avoids my eyes. “Why? The whole point of not being together anymore is that we don’t have to talk.”
Ouch.
The idiots next to him cheer him on—all but Vic—and I swallow hard. Without a word, I clasp my fingers around his tattooed arm and force his ass off the couch. Prying eyes follow our every move as I drag him to a quiet corner. I open my mouth to speak, but the surprise on his face stops me.
A small smile tugs at his lips.
“Your hair.” He tucks a loose piece of hair behind my ear. “You changed it.” I’m taken aback by the sweet gesture. For a second there, I recognize him: the Haze I loved. But as though he’s just remembered that he’s supposed to hate me, he clears his throat. “What do you want? I don’t have all night.”
“Oh my God, aren’t you exhausted? Just drop the act already. You’re not telling me everything. What the hell happened? What changed for your feelings to disappear overnight?”
He keeps his eyes fixated on the floor.
“Maybe I got tired of waiting for you to give me a chance, Winter.”
“What?” Is he serious? “I needed time. Can you really blame me? You lied to me for months. Months. Was I supposed to just let that slide?”
“No, you weren’t, and I understand why you didn’t want to be with me anymore, but, I guess… after a while, I got tired of chasing a girl I couldn’t have. I don’t feel the way I once did. You’re just going to have to let this go, okay?”
That bullshit again.
“I know you didn’t cheat on me.”
His jaw falls.
Panic stirs in his blue eyes, but he quickly pulls himself together, driving his emotions away with a deep sigh.
“Doesn’t change anything.”
I step forward. “Why would you do that? Why would you go out of your way to break my heart?”
He worries his bottom lip, eyes darting back to his shoes.
“Haze, please.” I can’t believe myself when I defy my last shred of dignity and place a gentle hand on his cheek. The gesture screams come back to me. He closes his eyes under my touch, like he missed it as much as I missed him. Then he shakes his head and steps out of my hold.
“I knew it was the only way you’d really let me go. What we had was too strong for you to just accept that I don’t love you anymore. It was the only way to make sure you’d leave me alone.”
“So, that’s it? You did all this just to get rid of me?”
“Don’t make this any harder than it needs to be.” He doesn’t flinch.
“Fine.” My voice falters. “Don’t worry. I’ll never bother you again.”
He opens his mouth, like he wants to say something, but decides against it.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a party to enjoy. After all, I’m single.” I walk off, elbows ramming into my rib cage on the way to… I don’t know where? I’m going to find Allie and tell her I’m leaving, that’s where.
I’m heading for the staircase when I bump into someone. I tumble back a step and mutter an apology.
“Winter?”
My eyes snap up.
“Caleb?” I say with a surprisingly real smile. Before the night I ruined it all, before he fell for me, before he told all me about Haze on my birthday, he was my best friend. The guy I could always turn to.
He notices my distraught expression. “Are you okay? You look like you could use a friend.”
I dodge his question. “What are you doing here?”
“You are aware that I have other friends, right? Someone invited me.” He laughs. “What about you?”
My gaze wanders to Haze, who found his way back to the couch. But you know who also found their way back to the couch? The blonde girl.
Except that now, she’s sitting on his lap.
Death in 3, 2, 1…
“Huh, mind telling me what the hell your boyfriend is doing with Laura?”
Breathe, Winter.
“So, that’s her name,” I say more to myself than to him. “He’s not my boyfriend anymore. We’re officially over.”
“You decided you couldn’t deal with the lies, huh?”
“No, it’s actually not my doing,” I painfully admit.
“Wait, you mean… he’s the one who broke up with you?” He sounds astounded.
“Yep. Made it crystal clear. He doesn’t love me anymore.”
He frowns, not buying it.
“Want to put that to the test?” He hooks one arm around my waist so fast my breath hitches in my throat.
“Caleb,” I warn.
“Just trust me,” he says with a reassuring smile. I can tell from the way he’s looking at me that he’s trying to prove a point. His right hand lies flat on my back while his other smooths down the fabric of my dress. Then he kisses my cheek. It’s harmless, but I still feel uncomfortable. Caleb tilts his head forward to whisper, “He’s mentally murdering me right now.”
Certain that he’s wrong, I pull away and send a quick glance in Haze’s direction. Our eyes instantly connect through the dimmed red-colored lights. He’s staring straight at us, his eyes loaded with anger.
“Doesn’t mean anything.” I focus on Caleb.
“Trust me, he’s jealous.”
He’s probably just drunk.
“He’s still staring,” Caleb says.
“Doesn’t he have Laura to keep him occupied?”
“She’s practically shoving her tits in his face. He doesn’t give a shit. I’m telling you, he’s not over you.”
I wish I could believe him, but I’m done searching for the hidden meaning behind Haze Adams’s actions. His words told me everything I needed to know. I heard them loud and clear.
“He said otherwise.” I peek at Haze from the corner of my eye. Wow, he’s got this whole murder look down. Does he practice in front of the mirror? “Maybe we should go.”
“Good idea.” Caleb grabs my hand and intertwines our fingers. I frown as he leads me to the staircase. I halt my footsteps, hesitant. He murmurs, “Just go with it.”
Torn, I decide that I have nothing left to lose anyway. We disappear up the stairs together, and he turns around seconds before we reach the second floor. “Believe me, once I’m done, you’ll thank me.”