13. Amelia
Chapter 13
Amelia
M atteo and I hadn’t spoken since our kiss. I knew he considered it a mistake, but I couldn’t bring myself to think the same. How could I when all I could think about was his lips against my own?
That brief kiss brought everything I’d been running away from to the surface. It had awakened parts of myself I was trying to eliminate. I’d been trying to ignore my feelings for him, trying to run away from my overwhelming attraction to him. I’d been successful for a while, but one kiss had tossed all my effort into the garbage.
Now, I thought about him constantly and I didn’t want that. I didn’t want to give Matteo that much power over me, but it was too late.
A few days after the kiss, I laid in bed still thinking about it. I tossed and turned as memories of the kiss assaulted me. vivid memories that lit my body on fire and made me want to forget everything and go to him.
I fantasized about the moment he pulled me to him and how his body was pressed up against my own. It had been so long since I’d experienced that kind of spark. Despite all my efforts, my desire for Matteo was still very much a part of me.
I turned my head to look at the door. I didn’t know if Matteo was home or not because I’d barely left my room. I only stepped out briefly to get breakfast. Agnes was as kind as she always was and thankfully, she had the good sense not to ask me about what happened between Matteo and me.
The last thing I wanted was to explain our complicated situation to anyone. I could barely explain it to myself. Agnes and I only ever spoke about my current hunt for a job. I preferred it that way. I told her all about my interviews while making sure to leave out the parts that featured Matteo.
I sighed and shifted my gaze back to the ceiling. My heartbeat thrummed at a steady pace even though my mind raced at a million miles per hour. If only Phoenix Consulting had offered me the job. At least then I would have somewhere to go instead of spending my days in bed thinking about Matteo. I’d started considering taking the assistant job I’d been offered but my gut told me to be patient.
I had a strong feeling I would get the job at Phoenix Consulting. Sadly, as more time passed, I began to doubt that feeling. I wondered what I would do if I lost on both ends. What would I do if Phoenix Consulting didn’t hire me and the time I wasted caused me to lose the assistant job I’d been offered?
I didn’t have an answer to that question so I simply sighed again. I’d been trying to sleep for hours but my dreams were plagued by two things. Sometimes I saw the look on Matteo’s face after our kiss. It was a look of pure disgust and regret. That look haunted me and prevented me from falling asleep. It was like a ghost that chased me through the dream world, never truly letting me have peace.
Other times I was haunted by the possibility of my parents finding out about my latest failure. If my dad found out I’d failed two interviews, he would use it as an excuse to get me to come back home. He would tell me there was no point chasing the dream of independence. He would convince me to come home and go back to living life in accordance with his will.
What he didn’t know was that nothing would make me go back. Even if I failed over and over again. I would rather keep trying than give up and go home. I just hoped I would have the strength to stand my ground when my father inevitably tried to make me come home.
My phone chimed but I ignored it. I wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone. Plus I was pretty sure the message was from my father. He’d been asking about how I was coping, clearly looking for a slip-up he could exploit. If I complained to him about my struggles to find a job, he would tell me that I didn’t need to find a job. He would tell me to just come home and resume working for him.
I was never going to do that, and I decided it was time to let my father know. I reached for my phone and unlocked it. I was surprised to discover that the message wasn’t from my father. It was actually an email.
An email from Phoenix Consulting.
I sat up so quickly that I knocked one of my pillows to the ground. I didn’t care though. All that mattered was the content of the email. I read through as quickly as I could, scanning over the long text to pick out the important words.
One word in particular stood out. Congratulations.
I screamed so loudly that I was fairly certain my windows developed a few cracks. I was so incredibly happy that I didn’t care if they shattered to pieces. I finally had a job and it was at an incredible company.
“I have to tell Agnes about this,” I said to myself as I jumped out of bed. She knew all about my recent efforts to get a job and she’d been incredibly supportive.
I walked to the door with a huge smile on my face. I was bursting with excitement and I couldn’t wait to share the good news. I was tempted to throw my windows open and scream at the top of my lungs.
This was the first real job I’d gotten in my life and it meant everything to me. I was certain Agnes would also be thrilled to hear that I got the job which was why I wanted to tell her first.
I pulled my door open but I paused when I saw Matteo standing there. His presence made me momentarily confused. I’d assumed he was at work so I didn’t expect to see him in the house, let alone outside my room door.
He coughed lightly before he spoke. “I heard you scream and I… I came to check on you. I was worried you were hurt but now that I see you’re okay, I’ll get going.”
I didn’t wait for him to leave. I was too excited and I felt a strong need to tell somebody. At that moment I realized he was the one I wanted to tell. He was the one I wanted to celebrate with. I rushed into Matteo’s arms before he could turn around.
“I got the job!” I shouted as I hugged him tightly.
To my surprise, Matteo hugged me back. I even heard him laughing joyfully. I hadn’t heard that laugh in five years. Today felt perfect. Not only did I receive a job offer from Phoenix Consulting, but I also got to hear Matteo laugh.
“Congratulations,” he said, his voice dripping with pride. Hearing it made me even happier.
Matteo held me tightly as he stroked my hair and I sunk deep into his embrace, allowing myself to absorb all the love he was showing me. For a moment, it felt like we’d both forgotten all the complicated history between us.
Our eyes connected as we pulled apart. In his, I saw desire, compassion, and… love. I did not doubt that the same could be said about me. He leaned in and I didn’t pull away when his lips touched mine. I didn’t stop him when he pulled me closer to him so that there was no space between our chests.
Instead, I kissed him back. I stood on the tips of my toes and pulled at the collar of his shirt so that I could kiss him with the same passion he was showing me. I knew I shouldn’t be doing this. The last time we kissed, Matteo didn’t speak to me for days. Still, I couldn’t bring myself to pull away from him.
Having him hold me in his arms and kiss me felt like the perfect follow-up to what was turning out to be a great day. And so I abandoned all reason and I melted against him. I tilted my head back when his lips trailed down my neck and I hummed in approval when they hovered over the spot at the base of my neck.
In his arms, everything else faded away until it was just the two of us. It felt like we’d floated away from the world, to a place where nothing and no one else existed. It was just us in this magical moment where we’d let go of all the hurt and pain that was holding us down. Letting it go was what allowed us to float away from the pain. I never wanted to return to it. I wanted to stay here in this—
“Amelia!”
The sound of my mother’s shrill voice reverberated through the penthouse, forcing Matteo and me to crash back down to reality. We pulled apart and stared at each other in confusion. It was as if we both wanted to be certain that we’d heard the same thing. It was too unbelievable. Surely my mother didn’t just show up at Matteo’s penthouse. That can’t be true.
But when her voice rang through the house again, I knew I couldn’t deny the truth. My mother was here. I pulled away from Matteo and rushed past him. I practically ran to the living room where I found my mother, looking around approvingly at the room’s decor.
“Mom?”
She turned to look at me and smiled brightly. “Amelia, my dear!”
I stood still as she walked over to hug me. I’d never seen my mom be so affectionate. It was strange and discomfiting. I wondered why she was here and how Matteo would react to her presence. After all, she was one half of the duo that forced me to end our relationship. I didn’t expect him to be thrilled to see her.
I wish she’d come at a different time. Any time at all. Why did she have to come when Matteo and I seemed to be making progress? He laughed with me, congratulated me, hugged me, and kissed me. That was the most progress we’d made since I got here.
When Matteo walked into the living room, I immediately noticed that the man from earlier was gone. His features had changed. The man who hugged and kissed me just a moment ago was not the one standing in front of me now. This was the cold man who spoke to me at the park on my wedding day. The man who seemed devoid of any feelings.
I couldn’t help but feel angry at my mother for bringing this version of Matteo back. I was finally getting close to breaking the wall of ice he’d built around himself but my mother’s presence forced Matteo to fortify his walls. Now he looked colder than ever.
I felt the coldness in the way he stood far away from me and I saw the coldness in the way he looked at me. Gone was the affection I’d seen earlier. In its place was only indifference. I was angry at my mother for ruining the moment we shared and for affecting the way Matteo looked at me.
“Nora, welcome. We weren’t expecting you,” he said. The tone of his voice was anything but welcoming.
My mother didn’t seem to notice. She beamed at him and rushed over to hug him. It was strange to see them so close. Matteo made no move to hug her back so their contact was brief. My mom stood in front of him, still smiling. “Sorry to drop by unannounced. I just missed my daughter so much.”
That sounded very unlike my mother but I didn’t point it out. She’d clearly come here on a mission, and I was curious to find out what it was. I noticed the way she clung to Matteo, and it was surprising to see her hug the man she once said wasn’t ‘worthy of breathing the same air as her’.
My mother clearly didn’t recognize who Matteo was. I wondered what she would do when she found out.
I chose not to tell her because I didn’t want to deal with her reaction. Right now, all I wanted was for her to leave. I wanted her to go because I could tell Matteo was uncomfortable. He didn’t say it but I could see it in the way his jaw tightened. It must be difficult for him to appear cordial in the face of a woman who regarded him so lowly only a few years ago.
I was impressed by Matteo’s ability to keep it together but not surprised. He’d always been a calm person. Anyone else would have revealed themselves to my mother and thrown her out of their home. I couldn’t even blame him if he decided to do that because my mother said awful things about him.
I felt a deep sense of gratitude that Matteo chose to be the bigger person. Still, I didn’t know how long he’d be able to keep his cool. I needed to make my mom leave as soon as possible.
For everyone’s sake.