Sterling #2
“She is. Ami, you going to say good morning to your daddy?” He seemed to wince at that title and I wasn’t about to touch that emotion for anything.
He clearly had stuff he needed to iron out and it wasn’t my place to do any of that.
Seeing to her needs was the extent of my involvement and despite how I wanted to heal whatever was going on because Aldrich seemed like a good guy, I wasn’t here for that.
But damn if I wasn’t pulled toward trying to help.
Gotta stop trying to fix the broken ones.
This man clearly doesn’t want to be saved.
There were moments when he seemed to go full-throttle with her and others where he would shrink back into himself.
It was almost like the baby had given him PTSD and he was trying his hardest to fight it.
I didn’t understand any of it and it wasn’t my place to ask but it was heartbreaking for both of them.
“Um, I wanted to go over a few things with you before I left.” Aldrich was shifting on his feet and I noticed he was looking more nervous than he normally did.
He was dressed down and I knew this was probably his attempt at being incognito.
The plain tee and basketball shorts with sneakers were helping, but he just had one of those faces that marked him.
He was too handsome for people to ignore and then when they realized who he was I was sure he was constantly getting mobbed. Downside of pretty privilege I guess.
“How long will you be gone and will it be okay if I contact you if an emergency arises?” I put Ami up on my shoulder after I noticed she’d sucked down the two ounces of her bottle.
Aldrich had looked into a donor milk program but was too wary of allowing what he called a random to nourish his baby.
Because she’d been in the NICU there were women who donated their milk free of charge to the bank.
I could understand the hesitation since the screening processes for a lot of places weren’t consistent.
Ami was thriving on her formula so it wasn’t an issue.
Her little face found its way directly into my neck as I rubbed her back soothingly to coax her burp out of her.
“Wait, what?” When I glanced up he looked almost confused and his body was tense, like something I said offended him.
“Oh, some of the parents don’t wish to be bothered if an emergency happens with their children while I’m around. They will give me power of attorney over medical—”
The look of disgust that crossed his face was clearly for my former employers and for me thinking he was anything like them.
“No, hell nah. I’m just going to be out for the day, not out of town or anything like that.
Not until camp. I didn’t even really feel like taking a vacation this year. Wasn’t in the mood.”
“I mean, no one would blame you if you needed to take a few days. Being a new parent is hard.”
He smirked and shook his head, the big fluffy curls on the top of his head moving as he did.
“Be for real. I ain’t done anything. You’ve done all the heavy lifting the last two weeks and I appreciate it too.
I can’t say when that will end.” When Aldrich scratched the back of his head nervously I knew he felt some kind of way about speaking his truth but I needed him to understand he had done far more than most families we’d dealt with.
When I wasn’t actively working with my cousin I would help him screen potential families especially those that had medical requests.
A lot of rich people didn’t have a basic understanding of sacrificing for their kids and wanted nannies to be basically be parents.
I’m sure he wouldn’t believe me if I told him the number of times women expected their nannies to be wet nurses to their children.
“You hired me for a reason. If it ends I don’t have a job.” Ami kicked her tiny feet and I rubbed her back a little quicker, hoping to get her burp out of her since she seemed to be uncomfortable.
“Yeah well we never went over days off that you might need or anything like that. I got a card with your name added to my account—”
“That wasn’t necessary. I can use the card through the agency and have them just send you a bill.”
“That seems like a lot of extra steps for no reason, Sterling.”
I opened my mouth to respond but Ami chose that moment to burp and I could feel something wet slide down the back of my shoulder.
Shit.
“Hey, can you grab her for just a second?”
“She good?”
“Yeah, I just forgot to put a burp cloth on and she got me.” I smiled ruefully because this was truly a rookie mistake. I’d thought she was a dainty little diva but apparently she had a little hellion in her too.
“Oh, uh yeah.” He took a tentative step forward and instead of letting him overthink it, I laid her gently in his arms. Aldrich immediately supported her head and held her securely despite the little wiggling she was doing.
“Let me just wipe this off—”
“Nah, go ahead and change. I know you don’t want to be smelling like half-digested milk all day. You're not a prisoner here, Sterling.”
I nodded but I still went swiftly into my room and changed my shirt as fast as I could.
I paused seeing him staring at her far more intently than he had before.
It wasn’t the look of curiosity she’d been getting from him.
It was almost as though he was cataloguing everything about her.
Maybe trying to parse out what features of hers belonged to him and what were her mother’s.
But then he had to mess up the sweetness of the moment by smiling.
Immediately, a sharp pang of lust tore through my body and I felt like a creep for thinking of this man like this. It was one thing to note he was attractive; it was another to wish that he was smiling over me like that as he stroked me.
I braced myself and shook the lust-filled thoughts out of my head.
I wasn’t about to go down that road and end up a cliché.
I wasn’t about to become fodder for the headlines or have my mother feeling like she needed to put a conservatorship on me like she’d threatened many times before so she could access my trust funds.
“Thank you for being so understanding.”
“She’s a great baby.”
I smirked at how he was defending her. “Let’s see if you would say that at 2:00 a.m.”
“Umm, yeah I’m sure that’s tough. I’ll have to listen out for her around then.
Maybe I can help some more before camp and the season starts.
” The offer was genuine but it still felt like it had cost him something to give it.
I wasn’t going to deny him the chance to work through his feelings so I just smiled graciously at the offer.
“Whatever you’re comfortable with, Aldrich. Your schedule was rigorous when I took this position so don’t feel as though you need to do anything outside of what you already are.”
“But that’s just it. I’m not really doing anything am I? I’m moving like nothing has changed when it really has.” Aldrich looked as though he’d been thinking hard about this and how he hadn’t shown up for his daughter.
“I’m…I’m not sure I’m the best person to talk to about this.”
“Why? You think we can’t be friends? I mean, you live here.”
I wanted us to be professional, but I knew that would be impossible with our current setup. “No, I have no problem with us being friends but I don’t know if you’re wanting to talk to me about this.”
“Ain’t nobody else here.”
“I mean…you don’t have friends?”
His face broke into that smile again and I swore that I was going to need to change my panties if he kept this up.
I needed to have a normal, hands-off professional relationship with the people I worked for.
I didn’t think that working for a young, Black, attractive athlete would be a challenge for me when I accepted the job.
But damn if this attraction wasn’t going to become a problem I didn’t need if I didn’t get it together.
“My friends are my family and the folks on the team. Of the few I still talk to from college who didn’t switch up on me because I made it but wasn’t funding their lifestyles like a fucked up version of Entourage, they don’t have kids.
And if they do, they actually fuck with the person they had them with. ”
“You said a lot without saying exactly what you meant to say.”
He smirked again, as if he knew he was being evasive and had no issue with that. Again, he wanted friendship but also wasn’t giving any information. So professionalism would stay firmly in place. “We’ll call it a talent. So what’s up? You can live in my house and shit but we can’t be homies?”
“I work for you—”
“Do I have to put that shit in the job description? ‘Cause you know Billy will make it happen.”
I laughed because he was constantly using her to threaten me. “You should leave that lady alone.”
“You don’t think she could do it?”
“I’ve seen her in action, I know she can. It’s just unnecessary. You don’t have to pay me to be your friend, Aldrich.”
“Swear to God I will give you a hunnid dollas every time you call me something other than Aldrich.”
I pursed my lips together but I couldn’t help but grin as I agreed with him. “Okay, Mr. Dinero.”
He chuckled, and that damn smile broke out over his face again.
I was sure he’d all but forgotten he was still holding his daughter.
“Gotdamn, you got me on that one. See, you're funny as hell. I was worried you were going to be some weird ass super strict nanny like that chick from TV. But now I see you’re about to be on your Mary Poppins shit and I can relax.”
“I’m not about to fly around the room with a damn umbrella if that’s what you're thinking.” He had me messed up if he thought I was that type of caregiver.
“That ain’t part of the Black girl magic? Damn, I feel like I should get a discount or something. What you think, Ami baby? You think Ms. Sterling can fly?”
My ovaries were squeezing together at watching him coo with this little baby.
To her credit she was staring at this man like she didn’t know who he was but there was a hint of recognition on his face that couldn’t be denied.
When she started to kick her legs in agreement, his smile only got broader and I was losing my firm grip on professionalism.
“Ami knows what side her bottles come from so she's not about to go against me.”
“We gone have to change that, one two am feeding at a time then.” Aldrich spoke softly but his words held promise.
“Maybe so.”
We ended up staring at each other, just smiling, before a gurgling sound rang out through the room. I tried to warn him but he sniffed, coughed and then gagged slightly. “Tell me this smell isn’t coming from my baby?”
I had to cover my laughter with a cough as his face got tighter the longer she worked out whatever had been in her system. With the way he was holding her, he should’ve been concerned about a blowout, but that was a joy I was going to let him experience on his own.
“Kids’ diapers do not smell like roses, Aldrich.”
“It shouldn’t smell like sewage either, gotdamn. Is this normal?” He looked truly baffled and the laughter I’d held in was now released just like Ami’s bowels.
“Completely.”
“Huh. Well, I’m about to head out—” He started to hand her over to me and I backed up so he couldn’t. “What you doing?”
I motioned between the two of them and then toward her changing table. “You're talking about two am feedings, but this right here is the trenches for real. Let’s see how you handle this first test of parenthood.”