Chapter 13 - Sergey
When Kat pulled away from me and disappeared down the hall, I didn’t chase her. I didn’t lose my mind with rage for being denied, and I didn’t do everything in my power to change her mind, even if the urge presented itself.
Instead, I stood in the middle of the living room after the fact, breathless regardless of how much time had passed. I felt like a wreck from the taste of her mouth and the way her body had fit so perfectly against mine.
She made me feel more than any woman had in a long time, and aside from the whiskey, I didn’t need anything else to get me there.
She was all it took to make me feel insane.
It’s maddening and intoxicating, and I can’t even complain that she stopped things before they went too far.
I’m on cloud nine anyway, even if I wanted to keep going.
Finally, I know what it feels like to kiss her, to hold her, and to have her melt even just a bit for me. It’s like the biggest, most soul-altering hit I’ll likely never recover from.
For better or worse, Kat is in my bloodstream now, permanent and completely demanding of my full attention. I don’t even want to shake her loose. Not when she felt so perfect. Tasted even more ethereal than I could’ve guessed.
And that is one of the most dangerous thoughts I’ve had in a while.
Not that I was one to share intimate details of my personal life with my brothers anyway, I haven’t told any of them what happened that night at the club, or after the fact.
I haven’t said much to any of them since I filed the legal papers with the lawyer. The tension is still there between us, given how I went rogue and diverted away from Roman’s plans.
I know he’s still pissed, even if he hasn’t said anything else to me. I can still feel it in the silence between us, and in the way his shoulder is colder than ever, even if I haven’t received the brunt of it in person.
Maybe I should care, given how intertwined my life is with Roman and the others, but I don’t. Not right now, anyway.
I’m preoccupied. I’ve spent the last few days at home, recuperating from the assignment, but more so, watching Kat. Hovering and making sure I’m doing whatever I can to make her comfortable, even if she still looks at me with contempt.
Honestly, she seems more likely to try and stab me than kiss me again, but that doesn’t mean I’ve been able to close off that want.
Not being able to touch her after that kiss is driving me insane, whether she knows it or not.
I’ve never wanted anyone like this—not even remotely close.
And with her, it’s not just the thought of sex. It’s her fire and the way she challenges me with every look and every word. She doesn’t cower to me, and she doesn’t entirely submit, at least, not without obvious reluctance.
Despite myself, it makes me want to earn her in a way I’ve never been bothered to with anyone else before.
It seems almost ridiculous, but I catch myself doing things I never would’ve dreamed of several months ago.
When I have the chance, I get the coffee that she used to buy all the time brought over. I had the towels in her ensuite replaced with softer ones, I’ve asked her what books and media she likes best, and I try to make sure the chef incorporates meals I know she enjoys.
Every small act feels like I’m reaching for a scrap of her attention, and I don’t even care how it might look anymore. I want to wear her down and prove to her that I’m not her enemy, that I can give her more than confinement and confusion.
It may not have been obvious at first, but I made her marry me for a reason, and it wasn’t just for the sake of the business.
I want her, and I can’t keep pretending it’s just part of the job.
At this point, it has nothing to do with Yuri or proving myself. Right now, I just want Kat to understand me and to see that I’ll do anything to gain her trust.
That’s a foreign concept to me, but for her, I’m willing to care.
I need to.
Kat’s curled up on the couch when I walk into the room, and she flips a page of the magazine in her lap, taking everything in like she’s trying to pretend I don’t exist.
It’s late afternoon now, and the house is full of the kind of quiet where even the clock on the wall nearby seems too loud.
Leaning against the doorframe, I watch her for a moment while I pull in a breath and proceed to swallow my pride.
Finally, I push away and take a few steps into the room. “You can call him.”
“Who?” Kat asks in return, not looking up.
“Roland, I mean,” I tell her, even if the thought still irks me. “You can call him and let him know you’re still alive. I’m sure he must be losing his mind by now.”
Her eyes brighten at the thought before they narrow slightly. “And what’s the catch?”
I can’t help my subtle smirk. She knows me so well already. “The caveat is that you do it on speaker, and you stick to the basics. No hints and no begging for rescue. Just check in.”
She looks both intrigued and not fully convinced yet. “And what do you get out of this?”
“Aside from him getting off my back, I have a favor to ask you in return,” I begin, putting my hands in my pockets. “Soon, we’re going out for dinner. I want you to meet my family.”
Kat’s face tightens at the mention of it, and I immediately catch the internal war waging in her head.
It’s obvious that she wants to talk to Roland; that’s clear enough. But the thought of meeting the other Lukovs…that’s a harder sell.
I half expect her to cause a fuss and fight back against the idea, but I watch all the while she goes through the motions inside her head, and the tension in her shoulders deflates a bit.
“Fine. I’ll call him and pretend like I’m not being held here against my will,” she says with a subtle hint of sarcasm. “Because apparently that’s not what’s happening here.”
“I’m glad we’re on the same page,” I murmur, pulling her cell phone out of my pocket before tossing it to her. I take a few steps closer and give her a warning look. “Don’t test me, Kat.”
She catches it easily, holding the phone like it’s a precious thing. I imagine it feels that way, too. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”
While Kat taps the screen, unlocks it, and clicks through to Roland’s contact, I walk over and sink into the couch beside her, close enough to feel the warmth from her thigh without touching her outright. For now, at least.
A moment later, Roland’s voice comes through the speaker, full of relief. “Jesus Christ…where have you been? I’ve been trying to call you for days. Your text didn’t sound right, and I thought something happened—”
“I’m okay,” Kat says, cutting in gently before he can get lost in his spiel. “I’m fine, really. Things have just been complicated.”
I watch Kat while she speaks, paying close attention to every word that leaves her mouth. So far, so good.
“Complicated?” Roland asks incredulously from the other end. “Kat, what the hell is happening? You vanish, it looks like a struggle happened in your condo, and—”
“I said I’m fine,” she insists, using a touch of humor in her tone, as if she can’t believe just how worried he is, or like his concern is unfounded. “I can’t talk right now. I wanted to let you know I’m okay. I just have some things to work out.”
My eyes narrow slightly at the thought of Roland knowing what her place currently looks like. By the sound of it, he had been there himself, which meant he probably had a copy of her key.
Christ.
That thought alone stirs something dark in me.
“Is someone with you?”
I catch Kat’s warning look, very clearly telling me not to say a word.
She was given clearance to call him, but that didn’t mean I’d be silent.
I clear my throat, unable to stop myself. “It’s good to hear your voice again, Roland.”
There’s a beat of silence, then it fills with skepticism.
“Is that…Sergey with the Panigale?” He asks, tone wary yet irritated. “You son of a bitch…”
Before I can say anything else to bask in the triumph, Kat hits the end call button and glares at me.
“Was that necessary?”
“He asked, I responded.”
She scoffs. “He’s worried. I told you this would happen.”
“Then he can stop worrying. You’re safe here, and that’s all he needs to know,” I tell her, gently taking the cell phone from her hand and placing it on the coffee table.
“I’m trapped, you mean.”
“No,” I tell her, tone firm yet not scathing as I lean closer. “You’re with me. That’s not the same thing.”
Kat’s eyes widen fractionally as her space is encroached upon, and her breath just barely hitches. “You could’ve fooled me.”
Neither of us says a word while silence lingers between us, and we don’t move. There are too many words left unsaid. Too many things we both clearly want to do but shouldn’t.
We haven’t said a word about the other night, regardless of how this has been killing me.
My gaze drops to her lips, taking in how full and gorgeous they are. How I want nothing more than to feel them. I know I’m crossing that line again, like I always do.
I swallow, glancing between her eyes and her mouth. “You’ll need something nice to wear…we’re going in a few days.”
“I’m not your trophy,” she murmurs, still clinging to that resistance of hers.
“No, you’re not,” I tell her, reaching forward to gently cup her jaw, lifting her chin subtly. I take in her features, silently pleading for them to break into the desire she had in her eyes before. “But I want them to see you. We’ll get something new beforehand, and I’ll take you myself.”
I don’t know why the latter statement feels so intimate, but it does, and even more surprisingly, I don’t mind it.
Despite herself, Kat doesn’t seem to mind either.
She doesn’t say anything while she studies me like she’s trying to work out what game I’m playing now.
But I’m not playing one. I’m too busy losing myself in how badly I need her. And not just her body or her attention, but every part of her.
Even if it might earn me a slap to the face, I lean in slowly, bringing my lips to hers. I pause, barely brushing our mouths together to leave her the chance to pull back.
It’s light and testing while I wait for her to react. But she doesn’t tear herself away.
Instead, Kat leans in.
Like every wrong has been righted, her lips find mine, along with her hand against my chest.
Giving in, I meld our mouths together, pulling her closer by the hip while I deepen the kiss. It’s slow, hot, and agonizing, but it’s everything I’ve been needing. Everything I’ve been dying to feel again.
Her fingers curl into my shirt like she’s anchoring herself, giving away just how badly she wants it too.
Still, a small part of her seems to be resisting something.
But that’s fine. I can be patient. So long as I get these moments to tide me over, I can wait as long as I need to.
“This wasn’t part of the deal,” Kat murmurs against my lips, pulling apart just enough for us to breathe, panting in that limited space.
“No…it was just for us,” I say back quietly, not wanting to disturb the delicate peace in this moment.
She looks up at me, almost like she doesn’t know what to do with me or whatever she’s feeling.
Hell, I don’t know what to do either.
But it doesn’t matter. For the first time in a long time, I want something delicate. Something that doesn’t involve spilling blood or trying to prove myself to my brothers.
I want her, and regardless of what it takes, I’ll do whatever I can to have her.
And after another moment of hesitation, she leans in, capturing my lips with hers again while her grip on my shirt tightens.
As hard as Kat tried to convince us both that she can’t stand me, we both know that isn’t true.
At the very least, she wants me just as badly.