Chapter 27
Chapter Twenty-Seven
ANDIE
“I miss you so fucking much. You promised me that you would never leave me,” I angrily tell him. Kellan left me alone in a world I don’t know how to navigate, in a life that has no purpose without him.
I stand and cry silent tears that fall like the rain beating down on me from above. My shoes are soaked and covered in rivulets of brown, as are both my legs. The late May temperature is already hot and muggy, the humidity made even worse from the liquid precipitation that has been relentlessly falling all day long. I fucking hate this city. I hate this life.
“I hate you for leaving me!” I scream at Kellan’s grave. My eyes widen when I realize what I’d said. “Oh, God. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it.”
I drop to my knees in the slick mud, my umbrella flying away in a gust of wind.
“I didn’t mean it. Take me with you. I want to be with you,” I beg him, clawing at the ground, flinging clods of wet, slimy mud every which way. My desperation to be with my brother leading me into darkness. I wish I had died with him.
I kneel at Kellan’s tombstone, his journal heavy in my hands. It’s the first time I’ve visited his gravesite, and it will be my last. Early morning dew clings to the blades of grass and soaks into the thick fabric of my blue jeans at the knees. The first peek of the rising sun has barely crested the eastern horizon, setting the sky ablaze in bright yellows and oranges. Unlike the other gravesites adjacent to Kellan’s, his plot is bare and colorless. No flowers have been left. No evidence that anyone has visited his grave since the day he was buried.
My eyes feel gritty and raw after staying up all night, listening to Rafe read me every word Kellan wrote in his journal. Keane was right. The pain I’m in is worse than any lash of the belt Max gave me. Lashes that Rafe never noticed when we were together because I made sure he didn’t see the evidence of them. Every time we made love was under the cloak of darkness. At night at the park or on the roof. With the lights off in my bedroom. If he felt the raised, rough scars when he touched my naked torso or thighs, he never said anything. Max was very deliberate and meticulous where he hurt me. Couldn’t have a daughter show up to school with a black eye or scabbed arms.
The white quartzite feels cold to the touch as I trace each letter of Kellan’s name engraved into it. There are no words in memoriam chiseled into the hard stone, like beloved son or an epitaph that describes what kind of person Kellan Maximillian Rossi was. I always hated his middle name for obvious reasons.
So, what kind of person was Kellan Rossi, the brother I adored and was willing to give up my life for?
He was a fucking liar.
The secret bank account he set up for me was paid for by Ortiz blood money and the drugs Julio funneled into the country using the shipping channels and ports Max controlled. Kellan was clever in how he stole from the Ortiz cartel. So clever, in fact, that Julio and Alejandro never noticed. I wouldn’t have touched that money if I knew where it came from.
But that wasn’t Kellan’s only secret. He knew. Kellan knew I wasn’t his sister. He knew Maximillian Rossi wasn’t my real father. He wasn’t even my half brother. His real mother was one of Max’s whores. As soon as she gave birth to Kellan, Max killed her.
But the worst secret of all? Kellan was in love with me. Or so he said, over and over, in his journal. Coded, rambling sentences that made my skin crawl as I listened to Rafe read those sickening words out loud. Made nausea churn my stomach as I looked at the hundreds of sketches of me drawn on almost every page.
Kellan recorded videos of Max abusing me. Kept them as a kind of twisted life insurance policy to herald over Max as blackmail. He used Max’s abuse as a way to keep me close to him. Dependent on him. Needing him. All the times I would crawl into Kellan’s bed seeking comfort from my nightmares. All the times he would hold me or touch me or kiss me to help soothe away the aches and pains of Max’s latest beating. It explains why Kellan always insisted I tag along with him and the guys wherever they went. Or why he liked staying home and spending time with me. Having me close was a way for him to feed his growing obsession. An obsession that began when I was four. The same age Max started coming to my room at night. It makes me sick to learn that the brother I loved was the same as the father I hated.
My miscarriage was Kellan’s apparent turning point. That’s when he started stealing from the Ortiz drug shipments and funneling the money into the offshore account. That’s why he kept those videos to use as blackmail against Max, and why I was sent to Switzerland. Kellan was building a nest egg for the two of us to live on. Together. It’s fucked up.
The day I left with Cecelia for Europe, Kellan and the guys went out to a bar. It’s where he met Sarah’s mother, Daniela. At least now I know her name. And I know why she caught Kellan’s eye that night. She looked like me. Kellan wrote that he hated her eyes. Hated the dull brown color of them. Hated that they weren’t violet like mine. Whenever he would fuck her, he would blindfold her so he wouldn’t have to look into her eyes.
The final entry in Kellan’s journal contained his last secret. It was written a week before he died. Even though Kellan had discovered early on that Max wasn’t my biological father, he didn’t find out until two years ago that Declan Levine was. A meeting was arranged. The details were few, but I have no problem filling in the blanks. Declan’s men infiltrated their way into the Rossi organization. Kellan figuratively opened the door for them to march right in under Max’s nose. Kellan was planning to kill Max and take over. I guess Max found out and took Kellan out first. His own son. The son he groomed from birth to be the next don.
Mom must have been in on Kellan’s plan. It explains why she suddenly took me to Switzerland and deposited me in the Swiss boarding school, and why she went to Declan for protection. Cecelia made a huge mistake though. She let it slip that I was his daughter; a secret Kellan never wanted him to know. Declan killed her because of it.
I pluck a small, yellow dandelion from the ground and pull a few individual petals off. “Amazing how an ugly weed can produce such beautiful flowers.”
The symbolism isn’t lost on me. I crush the flower in my hand and wipe the remains on the pants leg of my jeans.
“Thank you, Kellan, for giving me another weapon to use against Alejandro and Julio.” I clutch Kellan’s journal to my chest. “In a way, I guess I should also thank you for giving me Jax, Keane, and Rafe. They were your friends first, and I never would’ve met them otherwise.”
I stand up and look down at my brother’s name etched into stone. And then I spit on his grave.
“Goodbye, Kellan Rossi.”
With those final words, I walk up the grassy hill to where the SUV is parked. Liam meets me halfway, and I walk straight into his arms. Where I belong. Where I’m safe and cherished. My angel-turned-devil with the moonlight eyes who always knows exactly what I need.
“I don’t know what to say to help make it better.”
I kiss his short beard. The whiskers are rough and scratchy now because it’s only been a few days since he started growing it. It’s going to feel fucking fantastic between my legs, and I can’t wait.
“Honestly? There really isn’t anything that can be said to make it better. But thank you.”
“I think you can guess who’s been blowing up my damn phone.”
Mine too. Calls from Keane. Texts from Jax. Both from Rafe. I wouldn’t let them come with me. I needed some air and some time to deal with my feelings about the revelations Kellan wrote in his journal.
Liam never knew Kellan, so he was my neutral ground. He’s also my second since I’m in charge of Declan’s organization, and according to Liam, he’s still my bodyguard. Where I go, he goes—along with four other guards. It’s something that I’ll have to, unfortunately, get used to.
Z is standing beside the second SUV with Seamus, both men wearing casual clothes and displaying dual fuck-off expressions on their faces. A step up from the matching dark suits and dark aviators the guards at the Rossi estate wear that make them look like extras from The Matrix . I give a hand signal to let them know Liam and I are going for a short walk but will remain within sight.
“Cillian called. Declan’s awake and wants to see you. Fancy a trip up to Boston?”
Every time I called to check on Declan, he was asleep.
I take Liam’s hand as we stroll along the paved sidewalk that circles the cemetery. The sun is behind us, slowly rising to start a new day. The bright red of a male Northern cardinal flies across from one oak tree to another, chirping loudly to compete with the squawk of an irate Blue Jay.
“I’d like that. Did he sound alright? Is he in any pain?”
Liam stops us and brushes his knuckles down my cheek. “He’s good, bella .”
Good. But I won’t stop worrying until I can hear Declan say that.
I turn us back toward the Range Rover and take out my phone when it vibrates with an incoming message.
“Want me to tell them to fuck off?” Liam asks, assuming it’s one of the guys.
I frown when I see the text.
Unknown: Want to play a game, mascota peque?a?
I know what it means now because I looked it up. Little pet. It’s what Alejandro called me when I was locked in his cage. Adrenaline floods my bloodstream, and all my senses become hyperaware. Another message comes through.
Unknown: Guess who’s buried in that grave? I’ll give you a hint. It’s not Kellan Rossi.
I stare at the message in disbelief. The fuck?
My eyes dart around. Is Alejandro here?
“Liam,” I whisper, tilting my phone to show him the messages.
He quickly reads them and takes out his gun. Z and Seamus notice, and they go on high alert. The other two guards get out of the Rover. Liam and I look around, searching our surroundings. It’s all manicured grass, tall trees, and colorful flowers visitors have left at the gravestones of their loved ones.
“Anything?” I ask.
“Nothing. Stay close. I have an extra gun in my left holster under my shirt if you can get to it easily.”
With both our heads on a cursory swivel because of having to scan everywhere at once, we swiftly walk toward the SUV. It’s armored and has bulletproof glass. Right now, we’re sitting ducks out in the open, and I don’t like it. I crowd around Liam almost tripping him. I won’t let what happened to Rafe happen to him. If Alejandro is shooting anyone today, it’s going to be me, not my man.
Seamus rushes over to flank my side. I hold down the number seven on my phone. It’s programmed to directly call Tessa’s number.
Pick up. Pick up. Pick up .
“Hey, babe. I’m actually at the gatehouse waiting for Paul to let me in. He gave me a lolli?—”
I cut her off. “Tessa, Liam and I are at Kellan’s?—”
I don’t get a chance to finish. I’m hit with a scorching blast of heat seconds before being violently thrown backward.
BOOM.