Chapter Twenty-Three
“T
his is our first trip without the children,” Benny said as he opened the truck door for Libby that morning after she had delivered Fancy to Minilee.
“We’re on our first full trip without children.” She dropped her purse in the back seat and buckled her seat belt. “We adopted Fancy on our last trip together, so we can only count half of it. But we’ll be home by early afternoon, so maybe they won’t miss us too badly.”
Libby didn’t want to make small talk about dogs, the weather, or even the antiques they were going to Clarksville to look at. “Do you ever dream?” she finally asked when they were halfway to the paved road.
“Every now and then,” Benny answered. “Rather than dreams, I often wake up discombobulated. It comes from sleeping in so many hotel rooms. Seems like it takes me a minute or two to figure out where I am. How about you? What do you dream about?”
“I’ve had dreams or nightmares almost every night since I was ten years old,” she replied, keeping her eyes on the rearview mirror. The cloud of dust behind them obliterated the small community they had left behind. If only the past could be dealt with the same way—just get in a vehicle, drive away, and it was gone forever, never to return to haunt her again.
“Tell me about last night’s dream,” Benny said.
“Opal and Minilee brought over a watermelon, and you split it open. You ever seen those bubbles in cartoons that show people’s thoughts?”
Benny nodded.
“Well, those little bubbles kept popping up—only instead of thoughts, they were things that happened in my past. I took the knife from you and stabbed them so that you wouldn’t be able to read the words,” she said, and suddenly, the whole dream made sense.
She had told her Sawmill friends about her past, but what had been showing in those crazy bubbles were the helpless feelings she’d had during those times of distress. She didn’t want anyone to know she had been that vulnerable—most of all Benny.
You are not powerless now, a voice she didn’t recognize whispered softly in her ear.
“What do you think the dream meant?” Benny asked.
“That I’m opening up enough to tell you about my past but I don’t want anyone to know how it made me feel,” she answered.
“Why?” He made a left turn out onto the paved road. “Your feelings are what make you who you are.”
She turned and stared right at him. “Maybe so, but I’ve worked hard to become independent and self-sufficient. I don’t want to see pity in anyone’s face when they look at me.”
Benny whipped his head around and locked eyes with her for a couple of seconds. “Do you see that in me right now? I hope not, because I have the utmost respect for you, Libby. I’ve never known a woman with so much fire and yet such a big heart as what you have. I want us to be more than just friends.”
“Thank you,” she said and finally smiled. “When did our friendship and working arrangement turn into something else?”
“When I realized that you were the reason I wanted to come home earlier than planned. When I found all that glassware and wished that I could have you beside me to see your excitement,” he answered. “I really, really like you, Libby. I don’t want to spend that many days on the road. I want to spend more time with you.”
She remembered the kisses and the effect they’d had on her. She wasn’t innocent. She had had a couple of relationships in her past, but she wasn’t devastated when they had failed. Amanda had told her that was because neither one was right.
“We’re together twelve hours a day,” Libby whispered.
“Three days a week,” Benny said with a nod.
“And sometimes I go with you on trips.”
Benny smiled. “I want us to date, Libby, and to talk about something other than antiques and file cabinets. That day at the river was great. No one interrupted us with a watermelon or popped into the store when we were building shelves. We had the entire day to ourselves. I want more times like that.”
She reached across the console and laid a hand on his shoulder. “I would like that, but I refuse to be sneaky. Are you going to tell Opal and Minilee, or am I?”
“Why don’t we do it together?” he suggested.
“That would be smart—but what if we find that like is as far as it goes, and then it’s awkward for us to work together?” she asked.
“We can’t let the what-ifs control our lives. But I’ll see your what-if and raise you another one. What if fate brought us together, and we look back in fifty years and regret that we didn’t take advantage of our opportunities?”
Libby took a deep breath, let it out slowly, and smiled. “I’ll dive into the deep water if you are willing to jump with me.”
He reached over the console and took her hand in his. “I’m ready, and we can talk to Opal and Minilee when we get home this afternoon.”
Could this be what I missed in my previous relationships? she wondered. The openness? The honesty? The freedom to talk about the past and my feelings?
“Sally and Ilene are coming today to help them can green beans and make squash relish. Let’s wait until tomorrow and talk to them on the way to the farmers’ market,” Libby suggested.
Benny agreed with a nod. “What day each week will be good for our date night?”
“Sunday is out because we’re wiped out from work,” she answered. “Monday, we’re playing catch-up with paperwork and straightening up from the weekend. Any of the other three is good for me. I don’t have much of a social life, as you already know.” On one hand, the idea of dating Benny was exciting enough to make her heart flutter. On the other hand, it terrified her to be taking their relationship to the next level.
“How about we keep it flexible and just go out whatever day or night seems right for that week?” He gave her hand a gentle squeeze.
“Or stay in and spend a day at the river, or maybe grill some hamburgers and watch an old movie. I’m a cheap date. I don’t have to go to fancy restaurants,” she said.
“Another reason I like you so much,” Benny said with a grin.
“Good morning to y’all,” Opal said as she hopped up into the back seat with the agility of a teenager.
“Ditto,” Minilee groaned, using the handhold to pull herself up and ease into the seat behind Libby.
“Are you all right?” Libby asked.
“I’m just stiff from all the work we did yesterday. It’ll work itself out when I walk around the farmers’ market,” Minilee answered. “Take my advice and remember to not just sit down when you get old. Keep going as long as you can because once you sit down, then you don’t want to get up and go again.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Libby and Benny both said at the same time.
“You kids came home late last night,” Opal commented as Benny put the truck in gear and started driving down the gravel road. “Did you find the note on the station door?”
“I did, and thank you for babysitting Fancy all day,” Libby answered. “She was sound asleep under the table when I got home.”
“She was a delight,” Minilee said. “Sally and Ilene fought over who got to take her out for walks, so we all had to take turns. If she hadn’t been fixed so she couldn’t have puppies, I would have gladly taken a pup off your hands.”
Benny looked at her in the rearview mirror. “Maybe you could find a little Chihuahua at the shelter in Paris. They’re probably open today, so we could go by there.”
Minilee shook her head. “No, thanks. I’ll just steal Fancy when I want some doggy love. Did y’all find lots of good stuff yesterday?”
“We did, but not so much at the sale,” Benny told her. “We hit several garage sales that were selling everything for half price and picked up a couple of things at each one.”
“We brought home a lovely oak washstand that we got for five dollars and a couple of two-tiered tea stands from another one that we only paid ten dollars for both, not each. The auction had a barbecue wagon, so we got sandwiches for lunch, and then we found a little homestyle restaurant for supper,” Libby said.
“Libby and I discussed a lot of things yesterday, but the most important one is that we like each other, and we are officially dating,” Benny blurted out.
“Well, it’s about damn time,” Opal said.
“Hey, now,” Minilee argued, “you were the one against them going out at all.”
“Does that mean you think it’s a bad idea?” Libby asked and felt like a teenager begging for Victoria’s permission to go to the senior prom with Matthew Thomas.
“She can’t say a word about a person dating or even marrying whoever they please,” Minilee smarted off.
Opal shook her forefinger at Minilee. “You don’t need to drag up old stories. Sleeping dogs are best left alone, or they might rise up and bite you on the butt. Remember, I know all about you, too.”
Libby covered a giggle with the back of her hand.
“I’ll spill the tea, as you kids say today for gossip,” Minilee said. “Opal fell in love with Ernest, but her mama thought she could do better. He had been quite the ladies’ man from the time he was about sixteen. He drew girls to him like flies to a fresh apple pie coolin’ on the table.”
“She came around after a couple of years,” Opal protested.
“Yes, but you had to sneak around to date him for the six months before y’all eloped,” Minilee reminded her.
Libby hadn’t expected Benny to just blurt the news out and was surprised that Opal seemed to be okay with the issue. She had expected adversity from her, since she’d been the one who was so adamant that Benny wind up married to Tatum.
Opal crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Minilee. “Now that you’ve opened that can of worms, you might as well tell the whole story.”
“It’s your story, so you tell it,” Minilee told her.
Opal sat up a little straighter. “Mama said that Ernest was flittin’ around all kinds of young women that would make him a wonderful wife—like a fly or a honeybee. She expected him to finally light on a cow patty because all the good girls would figure out that he was what you kids call a player these days. But I loved him, and I knew he had a good heart.”
She paused and stared out the side window for a few seconds. Libby took that time to study Benny’s profile. From everything she’d seen, he had a big heart, too. He had refused to give up Elvis to go out with Tatum, and he didn’t really care about being rich.
“So when he asked me to marry him, I said yes,” Opal went on. “We knew we’d have trouble with my mama, so I told him we should get a marriage license at the courthouse in Hugo and get married by a justice of the peace. Then we would tell my mama afterwards.”
“What about your dad? Weren’t you worried about what he thought?” Benny asked.
“My father didn’t say much, but he agreed with Mama when it came to Ernest,” Opal answered. “I graduated from high school on a Friday. Ernest had been working down here at the sawmill for several months and had gotten a promotion up to supervisor, so we had a house to move into. On Monday, I rode into town with my dad with the excuse that I was going to apply for a job at the little grocery store. Ernest picked me up in his car out behind the store, and we went to the courthouse. The judge would have married us right there, but he was out sick with the flu. So we took our license and went next door to the justice of the peace. He had already left to go to Grant to go fishing with a couple of his buddies, but the lady there said we could probably catch him a couple of miles down the road.”
“Did you ever think that those were two signs you shouldn’t marry Ernest?” Libby asked.
“Nope,” Opal replied. “I figured that I loved him enough to jump over the hurdles. We caught up to the justice and motioned for him to pull over, and he married us right there on the side of the road. Ernest had just kissed me when my father came roaring down the road and slammed on the brakes so fast that it made the dust on Sawmill Road seem like nothing.”
Libby was totally engrossed in the story. “What happened then?”
“Daddy ranted and raved, and finally told me that I’d made my bed and now I had to sleep in it. We drove to Sawmill. Ernest went to work. I sat in an empty house the rest of the day and waited for him to come home. His folks brought us an old iron bedstead and a mattress that evening, along with some sheets and a quilt. The house had a cookstove and a refrigerator. Mama sent Sally down here with all of my personal things and said it would be best if I didn’t come back to Grant for a while.”
“How did that make you feel?” Libby asked.
“Deserted,” Opal admitted. “But Minilee and Floyd were right next door. They saved us.”
“Yes, we did,” Minilee said. “But me and Floyd had already been through our first year, and we had had our folks’ blessing. We’ve been taking care of each other ever since.”
Libby knew what Victoria would say about her dating Benny. There would be no opposition. All she would see would be dollar signs.
“Thanks for telling us that story, but I’ve got a question,” Benny said. “You were both against me going out with Libby when she arrived. What changed your minds?”
“She did,” Opal said. “We judged the book by the cover when we should have waited to read the whole story. I’m fine with the two of you dating, but don’t get in a hurry.”
“And if you ever get married, we want to be there,” Minilee told them.
“‘If’?” Benny chuckled.
“Go slow, and we might change if to when in a few months,” Opal said.
Libby had hoped that agreeing to go out with Benny wouldn’t cause her to lose her friendship with Opal and Minilee. She was glad they weren’t totally against the two of them dating, but talking about marriage this early in the game was downright scary. The very idea put her in flight mode. She reached for the door handle and began to tremble. She clasped her hands together in her lap and willed her pulse to settle down. Could she see herself committing to a lifetime with Benny?
“Maybe,” she answered, so softly that the road noise covered up the word. Her hands stopped shaking, and the rush of adrenaline that had caused her to think about running away settled down. She had always thought she would never be able to trust anyone enough to commit to a relationship that involved a white dress and a cake, but living with Benny sometime in the distant future didn’t sound too bad.