Chapter 11
“Good evening, Your Grace.”
Alexander returned Lady Jasmine’s eager smile, bowed politely, and greeted her.
“Good evening, Lady Jasmine, you look wonderful.” Lady Jasmine blushed profusely. “I hope you do enjoy the rest of your evening.”
Alexander walked away from her before she could respond, and he tried not to notice the disappointment that flashed across her features.
She was the third young lady who had approached him in as many minutes.
He had charmed all of them with light compliments, a teasing remark, and a gentleman’s smile.
It was effortless. Automatic. But utterly meaningless because he did not attend the ball for them.
Where is she?
He looked around eagerly. The ballroom glittered with candlelit chandeliers and jewels; the air was warm with laughter.
Couples swirled across the polished floor, skirts brushing, gloves whispering, and violins singing.
It was a beautiful scene, but Alexander barely saw any of it as he scanned the crowd again.
This time he would spot her easily because it was not a masquerade ball.
“Thank heavens,” he muttered to himself.
“Are you talking to yourself?” Spencer’s voice crashed through his thoughts.
Alexander turned to find his friend staring at him with an amused expression.
“All great men talk to themselves,” he responded cockily and grinned at his friend.
Spencer laughed. “Well, just be sure no lady spots that or she might deem you mad.” He clapped a hand on Alexander’s shoulder.
“I will be sure to keep my mumbling to myself.” Alexander nodded sternly and they both chuckled.
“Ah, my wife beckons me.” Alexander followed Spencer’s gaze to find Anna signaling for him. “I best be off, I would wish you luck, but you do not need it.”
Alexander laughed. “I might need it tonight.”
Spencer looked at him inquiringly before he walked away.
“I will see you later tonight?” he called out.
“Indeed!”
Spencer waved and disappeared into the crowd. Alexander continued his search until a flash of pale blue and light auburn curls caught his eye.
His breath stopped.
Theodora stood near the far side of the ballroom, speaking with the Dowager Countess and the Duchess of Winterleigh.
Her blue gown was simple but elegant. The color made her eyes appear brighter, and her skin softer.
She had her hair pinned in a way that exposed the delicate line of her neck, and he briefly imagined her with her hair falling freely over her slender shoulders.
What a sight to behold.
Despite their last meeting, he could not deny that she looked beautiful. And… nervous.
Theodora suddenly turned in his direction as if she felt him watching her.
Their eyes met and Alexander immediately began walking towards her.
He was surprised when she excused herself and made her way to him as well.
Alexander cut through the crowd, ignoring the murmurs that followed him and the ladies who tried to catch his attention.
He reached her at the same moment she reached him and they both opened their mouths.
“I am sorry,” they said in unison.
They froze, staring at each other in disbelief until they both fell into quiet laughter. The tension that had been strangling him for days loosened.
Theodora tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I am sorry if I did not behave correctly,” she said quietly. “My intentions toward your sister were pure. And I only wished to understand her better.”
Alexander shook his head. “No. I am the one who should apologize. I accused you of treating Rosalind as an experiment and that was unfair.”
She looked up at him, surprised. “You were worried, as a brother should be.”
“I was,” he admitted. “But that does not excuse my behavior.”
Theodora hesitated, then nodded. Alexander could not help himself; his gaze dropped to her soft, pink lips. Silence stretched between them as he gathered his thoughts and came to his senses.
Alexander cleared his throat. “If you are still willing… I would like to continue giving you my assistance. For your journey to disprove love.”
Theodora’s brows lifted. She thought about it for a second and Alexander’s heart stopped.
Why does her answer matter so much?
Finally, she looked around then whispered, “I will accept this if you tell me, honestly, how you felt during our kiss?”
Alexander was delightfully surprised by her question. He thought about it for a second before he answered her slowly and as truthfully as possible.
“I felt as though I needed more.” His words landed heavily between them as he gazed down at Theodora, noting the way her skin bloomed with color and her lips trembled. Alexander knew then that she felt the same way.
“Very well,” she said shakily.
Relief washed through him so intensely he nearly exhaled aloud. He noticed that the couples around them began drifting towards the ballroom floor as the orchestra shifted into a new melody and everyone began to dance a slow and elegant waltz.
Alexander extended his hand to Theodora, and she looked taken aback by his gesture.
“May I have this dance?”
She hesitated only a moment before placing her gloved hand in his. “Yes, you may.”
He led her onto the floor. Her palm felt hot against his own. Heads turned towards them and whispers began but Alexander ignored them and so did Theodora.
The moment he touched her waist, she inhaled sharply. Alexander felt the slight tremor that ran through her and he felt the corners of his mouth lift into a winning smile.
“Do you know how to dance?”
“Of course I do,” she replied haughtily.
Alexander chuckled as he guided her gently, his hand firm at her back, her hand light in his. She moved gracefully, though he could sense her tension, and her awareness of every point where they touched.
He was aware of it too.
Alexander felt her breath brush against his throat when she exhaled. Her cheeks flushed a delicate pink and her lashes fluttered when he drew her closer for a turn.
“I am not surprised that you dance well,” she murmured.
“You are easy to lead,” he replied. “We should have danced at the masquerade.”
She looked up at him, eyes bright. “You would dance with an alchemist? I thought men are not attracted to women who dress as such.”
“Ah, that is most men,” he said confidently. “And I am not most men.”
Her blush deepened as they turned with the music. Their bodies moved in perfect synchrony.
After a moment, Theodora said, “Do you believe in love?”
Alexander’s brows raised, the question was unexpected.
“Yes,” he said simply and without thought. “Why? Does that surprise you?”
Theodora seemed to not believe him. “You are the Scarlet Duke… your reputation does not prove your answer.”
Alexander scoffed. “My reputation does not suppress my beliefs.”
He noticed the brief second her eyes dropped to his lips.
“Why?” she asked quietly as they danced gracefully around the room.
“Why what?”
“Why do you, of all people, believe in love?”
Alexander’s mind drifted. He remembered his father always bringing flowers from Hawthorne Gardens before traveling.
He remembered his mother placing them gently in a fine vase, sniffing the blooms and smiling to herself, patiently waiting for her husband’s arrival until one day they both decided to travel together—
“Because I have seen it,” he said, cutting off the thoughts of his parents.
“You have?” Theodora cocked her head curiously and Alexander was not sure if the sight of her stole his breath or if it was the dancing.
“Yes…I saw it in my parents’ marriage. And again, with my best friend.”
“But you want none of it?” she asked curiously.
“No,” he admitted. “I have also seen what being in love does to people. How it eventually destroys them and leaves them hollow. Love is real, but it brings pain when it does not work out...”
She seemed to consider his answer.
“I agree that it destroys people but I also believe it is an illusion,” she finally said. “A trick of the mind, or a chemical reaction or maybe just a temporary madness.”
Alexander smiled. Looking at her then, he could see how her mind filled with answered questions about love.
“You make love sound like a disease.”
Her brows knitted together.
“Perhaps, it is,” she concluded. “Some people are married for years but they will ruin everything overnight. That is not love but foolishness.”
This time Alexander frowned.
“You sound as if you have experienced this yourself.” His interest in her deepened further.
Theodora looked around nervously. “I am merely speaking from others’ experiences.”
He noticed how uneasy she looked so he decided to cease digging any further.
“And what of passion?” He dropped his tone so only she would hear him. “Do you believe in that?”
Theodora’s breath caught. “I believe you are referring to hysteria…”
“The act of lovemaking,” he continued, “is much more pleasurable than love itself. I do believe that hysteria is not at all pleasurable.”
Her eyes widened. “You cannot possibly—”
“I speak from experience,” he cut her off.
“Well, theoretically speaking, the passionate side of love can lead to a certain type of hysteria which can be mistaken for something that is good. But it really is just like a glass of wine, or any kind of alcohol, which dilutes our senses and makes us feel something that is not there.” She seemed flustered as she tried to explain her discoveries.
Alexander grabbed her waist more tightly and earned a small gasp from her. “That is theoretically speaking. So, tell me, have you tried anything practical yet?”
Her entire face turned crimson and Alexander grinned.
“What is that blush for?” he asked, amused. “What have you been doing in regard to your experiment?”
She looked away. “I have just been...reading.”
“Reading?” he echoed and immediately remembered the little meetings she had with her friends. “I am curious to know what books contain information about your experiment.”