36. Ethan
Ethan
It was far too late to call my mother and tell her not to come to Maine. Besides, what would I have said to her? Not to come because there was a monster trying to kill me? Oh yeah, and it’s the same monster that killed Dad? She’d think I’d lost my mind. Again.
The only saving grace was that she would be staying at a hotel during a holiday week.
Halloween was sure to draw a lot of people to the city and there were lots of festivities happening.
She’d be so surrounded by people in the heart of downtown Portland that she’d be safe within the crowd.
The monster would never even know she was there.
At least that’s what I kept telling myself as I waited for her to arrive.
And the waiting was killing me. I paced Calder's living room, anxious energy making it impossible to sit still.
Every time I closed my eyes, I saw that box being carried away by some nameless monster in the dead of night.
Years of work and memories vanished into the night without a trace.
"You're going to wear a path in my carpet," Calder said gently from the kitchen doorway. He was holding two mugs of coffee, steam rising in lazy curls.
"Sorry," I muttered, accepting the mug he offered. "I just can't believe it's all gone. Every photo, every report, every single piece of evidence I collected. Gone."
Calder's jaw tightened. "I should have stopped it."
"It's not your fault," I said automatically, though part of me wanted to scream that he should have done more, fought harder, been faster. But that wasn't fair. He'd been protecting me, keeping me safe in his home while that thing hunted me.
"What time is your mom supposed to arrive?" he asked, clearly trying to change the subject.
I glanced at my watch. "She’s driving up so she’ll probably be at the hotel by three-thirty or so. That’s the earliest she can check in."
"And you still want to meet her for dinner tonight?"
"I don't have much choice," I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "She's already texted me three times this morning about restaurant recommendations. And I can’t let her think something’s wrong.”
Calder nodded, his expression unreadable. "We could take her to that Italian place on Exchange Street. It'll be crowded for Halloween, which means it'll be safe."
The thought of introducing Calder to my mother made my stomach twist with nerves.
Under normal circumstances, I'd be worried about the usual things…
would she like him, would he charm her, would she embarrass me with childhood stories?
But these weren't normal circumstances. My mother was walking into danger she couldn't possibly understand, and I couldn't tell her why she should stay away or that Calder was protecting me from it all.
"She's going to love you," I said, trying to convince myself as much as him.
Calder's smile didn't quite reach his eyes. "I hope so."
My phone buzzed with another text. Mom again, letting me know she'd just crossed the New Hampshire state line. I typed a quick reply, telling her I'd see her at the hotel later.
"I should go back to my apartment," I said, pocketing my phone. "Get some fresh clothes before she arrives."
Calder's posture stiffened immediately. "I don't think that's a good idea."
"I can't meet my mother wearing your clothes, Calder. Besides, that thing already got what it wanted from your place. The research is gone."
"We don't know that's all it wanted," he countered, his voice tense. "It could have been searching for you."
I felt a chill run down my spine at the thought. "Then why take the box?"
"To draw you out? To hurt you?" He gave me a shrug, but his expression was serious. “I just don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be out right now.”
That struck me as odd. Usually Calder was the first to jump in to escort me or protect me. But right now… it sort of felt like he was trying to keep me trapped in his house. And with everything going on, I needed air more than ever.
“It’s just clothes, Calder,” I replied, standing up from the couch. “We’ll be there for five minutes. You can come with me.”
He grabbed my hand before I could walk away. “Ethan… I’m just trying to keep you safe.”
“Okay,” I nodded. “Then come with me and keep me safe.”
There was a flash of irritation in his expression, but it disappeared quickly. "Fine," Calder said with a sigh. He ran his hand through his dark hair, a gesture I was beginning to recognize as his way of dealing with frustration. "Let me grab my keys."
I felt a small pang of guilt as I watched him reluctantly gather his things.
He was genuinely worried about me, but I couldn't shake the feeling that something wasn't quite right.
The way he'd been acting since the break-in was odd.
He was tense, almost secretive, and it was setting off alarm bells in my brain for some reason.
Something was wrong, more so than usual.
The ride to my apartment was silent, the rumble of Calder's bike filling the space where conversation should have been.
His body was rigid against mine, none of the easy affection that usually flowed between us when we rode together.
When we arrived, he scanned the parking lot carefully before allowing me to dismount.
"I'll go in first," he insisted, positioning himself between me and my own front door.
"Calder, this is getting ridiculous," I said, unable to keep the irritation from my voice. "It's broad daylight. There are people everywhere."
"Humor me," he replied, his tone leaving no room for argument.
I followed him into my apartment, watching as he checked each room with military precision. Only when he was satisfied did he nod for me to enter the bedroom and gather my things.
"Five minutes," he reminded me, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed.
I grabbed a duffel bag from my closet and started throwing in clothes. "You know, this whole caveman protector thing is starting to get old."
"Is staying alive getting old too?" he shot back.
I paused, a clean shirt halfway to my bag. "That's not fair."
Calder's expression softened slightly. "I'm sorry. I just... I can't lose you, Ethan. Not to that thing. Not to anything."
The raw emotion in his voice melted some of my irritation. I crossed the room and placed my hand on his chest, feeling his heart pounding beneath my palm.
"You won't lose me," I promised. "But you can't keep me locked away either. My mother is coming, and we're going to have dinner with her, and everything is going to be fine."
He covered my hand with his own. "I hope you're right."
I finished packing quickly, and soon we were back on Calder's bike heading to his place.
As we rode, I couldn't help but think about how much my life had changed in just a few weeks.
From a lonely reporter chasing stories to a man in love, being hunted by a monster, and about to introduce my boyfriend to my mother.
It would have been comical if it weren't so terrifying.
Back at Calder's, I showered and changed, trying to look presentable for my mother. I was just buttoning my shirt when my phone rang.
"Mom?" I answered, tucking the phone between my ear and shoulder.
"Ethan! I'm at the hotel!" she exclaimed, her voice bubbling with excitement. "It's so charming! All decorated for Halloween with these adorable little pumpkins in the lobby. You should see it!"
"That's great, Mom," I replied, trying to match her enthusiasm despite the knot in my stomach. "How was the drive up?"
"Oh, you know how I love a good road trip. I stopped at this darling little farm stand in New Hampshire and bought some apple cider donuts. I saved you some!"
I smiled despite myself. My mother's ability to find joy in the smallest things had always been both endearing and frustrating, especially when I was a moody teenager. Now, with everything happening, her cheerfulness felt like a lifeline to normalcy.
"So, dinner tonight?" she continued. "I'm starving after that drive. Where are we going?"
"There's an Italian place on Exchange Street that's supposed to be good," I said, watching Calder through the bedroom doorway as he paced the living room. "And Mom... I'm bringing someone."
There was a brief pause, then a squeal that nearly made me drop the phone. "The guy you mentioned? Calder? Oh honey, that's wonderful! I can't wait to meet him!"
"Just... be cool, okay?" I pleaded, knowing it was probably futile. "No embarrassing stories, no baby pictures on your phone."
"Would I do that to my only son?" she asked with mock innocence.
"Yes, absolutely," I laughed. "Every chance you get."
"Fine, fine. I'll behave," she promised. "Should we meet at the restaurant or are you picking me up?"
I glanced at Calder again, who was now watching me intently, clearly trying to follow the conversation. "We'll pick you up. Six o'clock in the hotel lobby?"
"Perfect! I'll be ready. Love you, honey."
"Love you too, Mom."
I hung up and let out a long breath. Calder crossed the room and wrapped his arms around me from behind, resting his chin on my shoulder.
"Everything okay?" he asked.
"Yeah," I nodded. "She's excited to meet you."
"And you're nervous," he observed, his breath warm against my ear.
"Terrified," I admitted. "But not about you meeting her. I'm scared for her, Calder. What if that thing follows us? What if it realizes she's connected to me?"
His arms tightened around me. "It won't happen. We'll be in a crowded restaurant, and I'll be there. Nothing's going to touch either of you.”
I turned in his embrace to face him. "Promise me you'll keep her safe. No matter what happens, even if it means—"
"Don't," he interrupted, pressing a finger to my lips. "Don't even say it. I'm not choosing between you and someone else. Not even your mom.” He pulled me into a hug again. “Besides, my contacts reached out. They’re getting close. It won’t be much longer before we’ve got that monster taken care of.”
His words were meant to be reassuring, but the hollow feeling in my chest only grew deeper. The monster was closing in, I could feel it. My research was gone, my safe spaces violated, and now my mother was walking straight into danger because of me.
"How are they even tracking it?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. "If the police can't even figure out what's happening, how can your... contacts be so sure they're close?"
Calder hesitated, that familiar look crossing his face—the one that told me he was calculating exactly how much to reveal.
"They have methods the police don't," he said finally. "Experience with this kind of thing that goes back generations."
I pulled away from him slightly, studying his face. "Like a family business? Hunting monsters?"
"Something like that," he replied, his eyes not quite meeting mine. "It's complicated."
"Everything about this is complicated," I sighed, running my hands through my hair. "I just want it to be over. I want to stop looking over my shoulder, stop worrying about who might die next because of me."
Calder cupped my face in his hands, forcing me to look at him. "This isn't because of you, Ethan. None of it is. You were a victim, just like your father. Just like all the others."
I wanted to believe him, but the weight of fourteen years of guilt wasn't so easily dismissed. If I hadn't survived that night in the woods, would the creature have moved on? Would all those people still be alive?
"We should get ready," I said, changing the subject. "Mom hates it when people are late."
Calder nodded, releasing me reluctantly. "I'll wear something nice. Make a good impression."
Despite everything, I found myself smiling. "Just be yourself. That's who I fell for."
His answering smile was warm, but there was something behind his eyes, like a sadness or worry that he couldn't quite hide.
I wanted to ask him about it, but part of me was afraid of the answer.
What if he was having second thoughts about us?
What if the danger was becoming too much?
“Calder? Will you promise me something?” I asked suddenly.
“I… I can try,” he replied, an eyebrow lifting in concern.
“Promise me that when this is all over… no more secrets, okay?” I placed a hand on his chest. “I want to know everything, the good and the bad.”
He swallowed hard, fear in his eyes. “We’ll… see.”