38. Lex #2
Tell me to stop, I silently beg. Don’t make me do this.
Her breathing is ragged and loud, echoing in my ears to the same rapid beat of my pulse. She sags into the mattress. “If this is what it takes to get you to listen to me,” she finally says. “Then do it.”
My rib cage cracks open. Blood pours out of the cavity. It’s amazing how I can keep standing. How there’s no red in my vision, but I feel dead.
I tighten the strap around her neck. “ Fine .” My chest aches . “You’ve made your choice.”
Juliet chokes as the belt cuts into her throat—airflow and blood flow.
If she dies… then this will all be over and I’m not ready yet.
I’m not even sure if I can kill her, no matter how much looking at her is like walking through the pits of hell.
She’s not the only one being punished here.
I loosen my grip just the slightest bit.
She coughs. I adjust her hair, yanking it out so there’s nothing between the fake leather and her skin.
My cock presses between her red ass cheeks, swollen, heavy, ready for its turn. I circle my knuckles with the slack on the belt and pull taut until she’s nearly bent backwards in half just so that she can breathe.
“I want you to remember this, baby,” I say to her. “If you survive me tonight and I leave you breathing when I’m done, I want you to remember this moment and know—I would have given you everything.” I did give her everything and because of her, I have nothing left.
“ Lex… ” She tries to speak again, but I already gave her a chance to stop this, to call off my revenge.
She chose not to. Her tone is pleading and she tries to crane her head back again, to meet my gaze.
I can’t look into her eyes, though, not when I’m about to wreck her.
I’m still not sure, either, if I can leave her heart beating after I’m done.
Not when my heart died the moment she walked away.
I’m so angry. I’m filled with nothing but animosity and pain.
All of the years of yearning. The decade and more of hope and love and worship.
It’s hard to turn it off. My own eyes burn as I strengthen my grip and anything else she might say is cut off.
She chokes again, struggling in vain against the bindings and my hard body pressed on top of hers.
I reach between her legs and sure enough, her pussy is as silky and wet as it was before.
Despite her protests, we are compatible in this.
She’s dripping with her arousal. I’d thought that when my belt made its way around her throat and her airway was cut off, that she might stop responding, but no.
Her heady scent fills my nostrils as her cunt soaks my fingers more than ever before.
A groan rumbles up from my chest, morphing into a dry chuckle at the end.
“You like it even like this, huh?” I withdraw my fingers and look at the liquid coating my digits. “A whore and a pain slut.”
She shakes her head. Bucks backwards, a low growl coming up through her chest and tapering out due to the actual chokehold I have on her. Were she free, I have no doubt she’d have me by the balls. She’s a fighter, my Juliet.
No, not mine, I remind myself. Not anymore.
My insides churn as agony slices me deep. If this is all I’m good for to her—not good enough to keep, to love, to stay, but good enough to fuck—then this is what I’ll give her. She slumps over onto the mattress, breath ragged and tension in every line of her smooth, naked spine.
“Fine.” I flick the juices onto her naked back and grip her hip as I line up behind her. Taking my cock in hand, I slick it through her folds, finding her entrance—swollen and needy. “I’ll make it hurt, then, baby. I’ll make it hurt so fucking good.”
I slam into her. Straight to the root of my cock, and she gasps, rearing. Her chest comes off the bed and I grip the belt in my fist to strangle her voice. Her tits heave and her insides clamp down on my shaft, squeezing as if she means to break me in this way too. I’m already broken.
With a building snarl, I withdraw from her cunt and thrust back in. Not a sound escapes her lips as her body trembles at the impact. She’s just a vessel for my use. A doll for me to fuck and discard. Nothing more. Not the girl I loved as a child. Not the woman I worshiped as a man.
I fuck into her, shoving my cock in until the tip slams against something inside of her and her inner walls contract painfully. Her lips are parted, mouth open—red flushing her skin.
Reaching around, I pinch a nipple—twisting it sharply and feeling her responding jerk. Not passed out yet. Good. I want her to stay on the precipice of unconsciousness—aware and unable to stop me as I fuck her towards the edge of death.
Juliet’s skin is warm to the touch. Her ass clapping back against my thighs as I drive into her hard. The wet, slick sounds echo up to my ears. No moans escape her. No noises of pleasure—just cold fucking.
Disgust warps my mind. This isn’t how I wanted her. She was supposed to be more, to be better. My next thrust is more punishing—I don’t care about bruising my own cock—I’ll do whatever it takes to make her hurt the way I do.
Finally, something breaks free from her throat—ravaged and barely there, she gags and chokes. Whatever she says, it’s a rasp too low for even me to hear. I pound into her pussy, tightening my hold on the belt until the fake leather bites into her skin.
My fingers dig into her hip. Soaked, inner cunt walls wrap around my shaft, contracting along its length. Cum bubbles up from my balls, threatening to release too soon, but it’s not enough. She hasn’t felt it hard enough.
With a curse, I rip my cock free from the tight, hot confines of her pussy and take a step back. The belt drops from my fist and she collapses face forward on the bed, dragging in gulping breaths as she coughs and wheezes.
The sight of her like this… bent over, legs spread, arms bound by her own panties, my belt around her throat, bruises covering her ass and thighs.
I start to shake. What the fuck am I doing? I rake a hand through my hair, gripping the longer strands and yanking hard. My chest collapses in on itself.
Why did she have to leave? Why did she say those things? My eyes burn. She was supposed to be mine and I… She was supposed to want me enough to let me be hers too.
The marks left by my abuse don’t make me feel better. They only piss me off even more. Why did she have to make me do this? Why did she have to be a fucking liar?
People say passion burns hot.
No one ever warned me that falling in love was like stepping into the fire and letting your skin melt from your bones.
No one ever told me it would hurt.
“I fucking hate you.” The words are quiet, ripped from my throat in a hoarse whisper. I’ve never said anything that is both a truth and a lie.
Juliet stiffens on the mattress and slowly, so infinitely slowly, she turns her cheek.
Tear tracks are practically branded into her face.
The circle of an already forming bruise laces around her throat.
I expect to see my hatred returned to me.
Instead, she merely looks at me with an empty kind of hopelessness.
As if the words I’ve spoken are the worst thing I could have thrown at her. Not the belt. Not the choking or fucking. But my verbal hatred. Even if it’s a lie and she fucking knows it.
“You hate me?” Her voice is nearly gone, as destroyed as mine is. Pink, swollen lips twist into a grotesque sort of smile. A grimace. “Then prove it.” Her challenge is a dagger to my heart. “If you hate me, then finish this and kill me. I’ll believe you hate me then.”
I close my eyes, unable to look her in the face. Despite all of the turmoil rolling through me, my cock hasn’t gone down. It remains standing at attention, practically begging me to take her again.
Stepping up against her backside again, I grip her ass and spread her open.
I’m coated in her juices, my length practically shining as I stroke it up and down her crack, leaving a trail of wetness behind.
My eyes lock on that secret dark place between her cheeks.
Her asshole is smaller than her pussy. It’s going to hurt because we never got around to prepping her with a plug.
Had I been given the chance, I would’ve worked her up to this.
I would’ve spent hours worshiping her ass, lubing her up, rimming her with small plugs and moving her up gradually to larger and larger ones until she was well and truly prepared for my cock in this tiny hole.
Time, however, has never been on our side.
“We never got this far,” I whisper, my voice incapable of going any higher as I fit the head of my shaft to the small dark hole of her ass.
“But if you’re serious… then this is it.
You want me to prove my hatred, baby? I can do that.
But you should know, this is only a small fraction of the pain you gave me. ”
I stroke my cock back and forth between her scalding hot ass cheeks.
No matter what I do, this is still going to hurt.
Me. Her. Both of us. But even as angry as I am, there needs to be something to loosen the fit of my cock in her ass.
So, I stroke my cock and I imagine what it would’ve been like had she stayed—if she’d meant every word.
It doesn’t take long, I fist the base and grunt as I come. Jets of white cum, thick and dripping shoot out onto her skin. Keeping her ass in my hands, spreading her cheeks wide, I part my lips and let a long stream of saliva fall right over her dark hole, joining my cum.
Then, I push a finger through the mess and right against her asshole.
Her spine straightens as I finger her hole, rimming the tiny place before I ruthlessly send the mixture into her.
First one finger—right to the knuckle—then all the way back out.
A second finger soon follows. I scissor them apart.
Juliet makes a startled noise, her body bowing in anticipation, and a part of me considers warning her against it.
Resistance will only make it hurt that much more.
I stare down at her ass as I press a third finger in to stretch her further.
A little bit of spit and cum won’t make this easy, but hopefully it’ll keep her from tearing.
Because as much as I fucking hate her… I think she might also be right.
I still love her too.
Can you hate someone and love them at the same time?
The first tear falls from my eyes as I withdraw my fingers and push forward. There should be time between my first climax and now, but no matter how many times I take her, my cock is always ready for her. It has never been like this for anyone else. No one else has ever been my Juliet.
The slide is slow and painful. She splits open, a pained groan echoing from her.
I grit my teeth and grip her tighter. Each inch gained tightens her around me more.
The wetness of her cunt juices dries up quickly, making the act harder and arduous than it would have been had she been prepared to take me here.
Hovering over her as I am, I let a fresh stream of saliva dribble down as my cock enters her darkest hole, trying to ease my way inside even as I want us both to hurt and hate this.
I want this to be a reminder of what we could have had—with the others, we could have made this so much better for her.
We would have worshipped at her altar, taking care of her, easing her, preparing her to take us all.
Now, all we have left is pain and betrayal.
She twists on the mattress, back and forth.
Does she regret her challenge now? “ Lex .” Juliet’s whimper stabs into my ears as she calls my name.
She doesn’t tell me to stop anymore, not even when I know that it hurts her.
The second tear falls, sliding down my face. “Lex. You’re… It’s too big. Oh, God… ”
She moans. Fuck, of course she does. I knew she’d like my cock in her ass. Nolan had said she seemed open to the idea. I didn’t know how much. Even in pain, she likes it. And here I am—fucking her and breaking apart with each burning inch.
I finish the excruciating task of shoving my cock deep into her asshole until her ass cheeks meet my hips once more. Sweat dots my forehead, slides down my spine.
It’s tighter than any hole I’ve ever fucked. Squeezing me harder than any fist. The slide backwards is both alleviating and just as painful as entering her. I can feel her soft pants, feel the physical relief of her body as she thinks that’s the end. It’s not.
My second thrust tells her the truth. This is it. I won’t be finishing until I find my final climax in the dark recesses of her body, until I mark her the way no one ever has.
From the back, I reach forward, curling my fists around the sides of her throat. The belt, still there, is pinned beneath my palms. I squeeze, lifting her up and using my hold on her neck to yank her down onto my cock.
I lift her up, higher and higher, pinning her naked, bruised form between me and the footboard of the bed.
Her legs kick uselessly against the fronts of my calves, her feet leaving the floor.
Gravity drags her down farther, sinking her on my cock until the only thing holding her aloft are my hands wrapped around her throat and my dick deep in her ass.
I jerk as my orgasm surges forward. My teeth dig into her shoulder, biting down hard.
Her body clenches around me as I spill my seed.
Jet after jet of cum washes into her asshole.
My fingers constrict harder and I can feel the air leaving her, no more entering.
She’s on the cusp. If I were to look into her eyes, I know they’d be rolling back into her head.
I could stop here. Let her go. Or… I could do what would make me feel better. If I can’t have her, if she won’t let me have her—then no one should be allowed to.
If I kill her, then she can stay in my memories as the perfect girl. Her struggles renew, but only briefly. We’re too far gone, her and I. A few more seconds and this will all be over. She’ll be gone and maybe I won’t hurt so bad anymore.
It’s the cruelest thing I’ve ever done. I’ve never even treated paid whores like this. I wouldn’t have considered it, but her—the woman I love? The woman who betrayed my brothers and me?
She deserves this kind of treatment.
She forgot that being mine means more than mine to protect. She might have left, but she’s still mine in the end. Now, she’s just mine to destroy.
Just as I was hers… and she destroyed me.