Chapter Fifteen
The walk from the station to the library was as familiar to Jude as anything else from her childhood.
She and Henry had often made the trek together, skipping along Main Street, cutting through the alley.
Sometimes they would throw rocks in the creek.
Usually, they would sneak behind the hardware store to see if Myrna’s car was parked in the lot.
More often, they would end up at the library because it was the only air-conditioned building in town.
Emmy lifted her chin in greeting to the gray-haired librarian behind the circulation desk as they crossed to the other side of the building.
She’d brought the evidence bags with the keys and Feynman’s Tips on Physics from the station.
There didn’t seem to be a section dedicated to physics, just a catch-all shelf labelled Popular Science.
Jude ran her finger along the edge and found a fine layer of dust. There only seemed to be one book missing.
Emmy checked the numbers on the spine of the Feynman book, then pointed to the empty slot. “This is where it was shelved.”
Jude slipped on her reading glasses. “Let’s see what we can see.”
Emmy started pulling down books to check if anything was hidden behind them. Jude searched the other Feynman titles, pages fluttering as she looked for a scrap of paper or another scribbled note.
Emmy said, “This is needle in a haystack-level insanity.”
Jude looked up from her book. “It took me twenty years to persuade Freddy Henley to give me the location of his last victim’s remains.”
“Brett’s grandchildren will be running for sheriff by then.” Emmy sighed. “Allison called me two months ago. I didn’t pick up.”
Jude could see the toll the admission had taken on her.
Emmy started tapping and swiping on her phone.
“I sent the call to voicemail. Things had started to go really downhill with Mom. I called Allison back a few days later and she laughed it off, said everything was fine. I didn’t push her.
I was just so damn tired. That’s the last time I talked to her.
I think we agreed to get drinks a week later, but I never followed up. ”
“Neither did she.”
“Yeah, well. Only one of us ended up murdered.”
Jude took off her glasses and held the phone to her ear.
“Hey, you. I’m sorry it’s so early. I’m hoping you’re asleep right now.
I’m leaving this message so that I won’t back out.
I want you to know I’ve got a plan. Don’t worry.
I’m being careful. I just need a little help.
That’s all. Just a little help. You were always so good at figuring things out.
Your mama raised a smart girl. Call me back. Bye.”
Jude could hear an almost giddy sense of hope in Allison’s voice, which made the circumstances all the more tragic. She handed Emmy back the phone. “Abused women are told to get a plan in place before they leave.”
“She said she needed my help figuring something out. That doesn’t sound like leaving Bill. It sounds like she had something halfway planned, but she needed my help to get it over the line.”
“She had three hundred grand, plus the settlement money, and two fake IDs. What else would she need?”
“That’s the question.” Emmy returned her phone to her pocket.
“A few years ago, Allison was looking for ways to connect with Mandy. I told her how Mom used to leave puzzles for me around the house. Like, one time, I found a note under my pillow that said, ‘I ended up in prism, but it was a light sentence that gave me time to reflect.’”
Jude smiled at Myrna’s cleverness.
“Took me two days to figure it out—prism, light, reflection—rainbows. My winter gloves had rainbows on them. I found them in the hall closet. Mom had hidden a bag of M&Ms inside.”
“She used to do word puzzles for us, too. She loved language.”
Now they were both smiling. It was the first time they’d shared a positive memory about Myrna together.
Emmy said, “The point is, I feel like Allison left me some clues in case something bad happened. Does that sound crazy?”
“It sounds smart,” Jude said. “There were probably very few moments during her relationship with Bill that she didn’t feel at some level like she might be killed.
It’s not unheard-of for abused women to write letters or send emails in case they’re murdered so that their abuser is brought to justice. ”
Emmy’s phone came out again. The screen glowed with a call. She looked confused. “That’s Tommy. He never calls me.”
Jude watched Emmy disappear into a study room. She randomly pulled one of the other Feynman books and scanned the page for other works. The Character of Physical Law. Six Easy Pieces. Six Not-So-Easy Pieces. Surely You’re Joking, Mr. Feynman!
Some of those titles sounded like they belonged in Essays or Non-fiction.
Jude motioned to Emmy that she was going to look in another section.
She searched along the rows. Jude had been raised on the Dewey Decimal system.
The last time she’d used this library, there had been a card catalogue system overseen by a librarian whose mission in life was to interrogate children on their reading choices.
Tommy had called her Mrs. Kravitz after the nosy, high-strung neighbor from Bewitched.
She scanned the signs on the endcaps. Jude was so preoccupied that she nearly ran into one of the patrons, a man who smelled like cigarette smoke and was carrying a stack of books. He turned sideways to let her pass.
“Ma’am.”
Jude nodded her thanks. She took a chance and detoured into the Humor section, since the word joking was in one of the Feynman titles.
The book was on another dusty shelf. She opened the cover.
Jude actually did a double take because she had assumed this was a fool’s errand.
The familiar, crisp handwriting was in a green marker.
Allison had written down the same number in the book that Emmy had found on the back of the Wyeth print hanging in Allison’s foyer.
2002.
“Sorry.” Emmy walked up the aisle. “Tommy wants me to go fishing with him when the case is over.”
Jude knew there was more to the call than that. She’d texted Tommy about Lee. Emmy had been effectively raised as an only child. She wasn’t familiar with the machinations of siblings. “That’s nice.”
“That’s weird.” Emmy nodded toward the book. “What’s up?”
Jude showed her the numbers. “You were right. Allison left you clues.”
“You were right.” Emmy took the book. “I didn’t think it meant anything.”
“She knew you would remember Christina’s World from book club. And if you didn’t, she hoped you would find the Feynman book here. What happened in 2002?”
Emmy flipped through the pages. “I was pregnant with Cole half the year. Allison and I were both working patrol. I still didn’t know her that well.
I was drowning. Jonah couldn’t hold down a job.
I kept taking extra shifts. If I wasn’t throwing up on the side of the road, I was writing speeding tickets in between studying for my college midterms.”
Jude tried to swallow her guilt. She could’ve helped. “We could look up the year on the internet, narrow it down to events in Clifton County.”
“Let’s ask the librarian. They usually know more than Google.”
The gray-haired woman at the circulation desk was not Mrs. Kravitz, but she was younger than Jude, which hurt almost as much.
Emmy said, “Hey, Barbara.”
“Hey, girl, you ready for the debate?”
“Yep.” The question had clearly thrown Emmy. “Did Allison leave something for me?”
“No, why? Was she supposed to? Is this about Bill?”
Emmy placed Surely You’re Joking, Mr. Feynman! on the counter. “Did she ever check this out?”
“I don’t think that’s the one she liked.” Barbara started typing on the keyboard under the counter. She turned the monitor so they could see. “Feynman’s Tips on Physics was her favorite.”
Jude put on her glasses. Allison’s lending history had ebbed and flowed, but she’d first checked out Feynman’s Tips two months ago, and she’d rechecked it every two weeks since then.
Emmy asked, “Is this a comprehensive list of all the books she borrowed?”
“Yeah, you can’t check out microfiche.”
Emmy’s eyes narrowed. “What microfiche?”
“They’re stored in the back.”
“Can you take us there?”
Barbara logged out of the computer. She grabbed a large key ring and motioned for them to follow her to the other side of the building.
She badged them through a door marked STAFF ONLY, then through a room taken up by a giant machine with conveyor belts that sorted returned books.
The next door took them down a long hallway.
Barbara stopped at the end, where yet another door was marked ARCHIVES.
She searched her key ring until she found the right one.
Emmy asked, “May I see that?”
Barbara showed her the dimple key that was intended for a high-security lock. “This used to be our computer room back when they were super expensive. In today’s dollars, we’re talking about eight grand each. Priciest things in the library, if you can believe it.”
Emmy asked, “Did Allison have a copy of this key?”
“Yeah, we gave her one along with a badge so she could let herself back here.” Barbara slipped the key into the lock. “Now that I think about it, she returned the badge, but she didn’t hand in the key.”
“Did you give her any other keys?”
Barbara shook her head. “No, the keys for the cam locks are on hooks inside.”
Jude almost laughed. Cam locks, or tubular locks, required a barrel key, the same as certain models of safes. She didn’t know who was more clever, Allison for leaving the clues or Emmy for figuring them out.
Barbara opened the door. “We’ve been trying to digitize these, but there’s not enough money.”