35. Chapter Thirty-Three #2
I stared at her, mouth agape. Gone was the woman I had met yesterday with laughter in her eyes, and in her place—a goddess-trained warrior.
A true daughter of war. The woman who had just admonished her brothers and sisters in defense of me was going to hold me to the same standard she held them.
I felt a smile tug at my lips at the thought.
Because that felt like I was fitting in somewhere.
“You are inexperienced with the blade, the reasons behind it are inconsequential,” she waved a careless hand in the air before continuing.
“Searching for sympathy regarding your lack of skill isn’t going to get you anywhere with me.
If we’re going to do this, you'll need to strengthen your spine.
I will not go easy on you. We don't have time for that. The realms are shifting and battle is on the horizons because of it. Both my mother and the Forest God have seen something in you. I see something in you. You want to fight. You were never meant for temple chains, Aurenya. This training is paramount if you want to defend the realms…defend yourself and everyone you care for in this life.” She leveled me with a fierce look, her eyes swirling with unbridled determination.
“Mercy and sympathy are considered weaknesses in this house. You earn respect, it isn’t freely given.
Do you understand? Nod once if you do, I won't waste my time training you otherwise.”
I nodded once. She was a formidable force, and everything I’d ever wanted was in front of me. I would need to put my pride aside and trust her implicitly. I lowered my gaze, shame sitting low in my gut like the rotting trees in Morhaven.
She took her sword and placed it under my chin, bringing my gaze back to hers, which was filled with both fire and newfound focus.
“Good.” She grinned and lowered the sword once more, obviously having seen something in my eyes she deemed worthy.
Mairenn twisted her wrist and spun the training sword around as if the weight didn’t affect her in the slightest. “We are going to start with some basic maneuvers. Right now, our primary focus is getting your wrist used to the length of a sword, and the various stances your stature will allow. I’ll explain when they’re best used, and how to gain the upper hand using them.
You do not have divinity singing in your veins, and that will always be a disadvantage.
We’ll need to work on how to level that field.
You’ll also need to work harder than most. But you can do it. You will.”
I listened to her with rapt attention, I couldn’t believe this was actually happening.
I couldn’t help but feel gratitude for Tairngire, for taking me to this place and giving me the one thing he knew I’d always desired.
I was overcome with unfamiliar emotions I wasn’t sure what to do with, because as much as I respected him, he was still an arrogant and frustrating god with secrets.
And with the way he was looking at me last night, I wasn’t sure what his intentions with me were, and that scared me more than Mairenn's ire.
Mairenn continued, breaking me out of my spiraling thoughts with a sharp tone and a harsh glare.
“Pay attention. After you’ve mastered the maneuvers, we will switch to training with real steel.
Blunt edged blades, just so you can get a feel for the weight.
You'll also undergo combat training. Mostly defensive moves for now.”
I jerked back in surprise—combat training would mean I’d have to…
touch. I had just gotten a handle on shoving down my visions when they bubbled to the surface, I had no idea if I’d be able to maintain that if I was under pressure in a hand-to-hand situation.
She seemed to read the abject terror on my face because she gave me an amused look.
“Ah, yes. Tairngire has also informed me of your visions—how it can be…difficult for you to prevent them.”
Of course, he did.
“Which is precisely why he volunteered to be the one to train you hand-to-hand. He seems to be resistant to your visions for now. But they could paralyze you in a critical moment, so eventually we will need to take the safety gloves off and have you train with someone else."
I opened my mouth to argue but she held up a hand to silence me. “Combat training is a necessity. There could be a time when you’re weaponless and need to extricate yourself from a situation. It will also help you with footwork. It isn’t debatable, you will do it.”
Her look was stern and undeniable. Whether I liked it or not, it seemed I would be training with the god who had my emotions tied in knots. I couldn’t sit in my frustrations for long, though. Mairenn was already walking closer to me, ready to impart her knowledge.
“Now. Let’s get started.”
Mairenn started to show me various guard stances and the importance of using them in certain situations as promised. She showed me how to block a hit coming at me with my own sword, that it could also be used in defense along with offense. She called it a parry.
It took a few hours for her to guide my hand, showing me how to execute a strike and how to block, being careful not to touch me directly. I was thankful for her attentiveness, but that didn't last long.
She came at me quick and lethal in a way that I wasn’t prepared for.
The first clash came fast, remarkably so.
I held up the sword in a defensive stance.
It was entirely sloppy and uncoordinated.
By all the gods, her sword struck mine with the strength of ten mortal men!
I stumbled, my boots slipping on stone, chest aching beneath the armor.
Even though the sword in my hand wasn’t made from steel, it still felt awkward and heavy in my hand.
“Again,” she barked, not even breaking a sweat.
I was beginning to think Mairenn was a serious bitch.
I lunged. Clumsy. Predictable. She swept my legs out from underneath me with hers. I hit the stones hard, air bursting from my lungs. Laughter rippled from the watching brood, but her voice soon drowned out their jeers.
“Up, Aurenya. You’ll stay down often enough on a battlefield—when you’re long dead. Not before. Ignore them, focus on channeling your emotions into every strike.”
My shattered pride burned hotter than the bruise forming on my hip. I got up. Again.
We fought. Each time I failed, she would force me to rise. My arm shook, sweat stung my eyes, braids clung damp to my skin. Mairenn pressed on—unyielding. Her eyes gleamed with the same steel as the blade sheathed at her back, the weight of it held easily as she came at me again.
“You think your Sight will save you?” she snarled when I faltered. “It won’t. Foresight means nothing if you can’t lift a wooden blade, if you can’t strike when it matters. You want to be more than the gods’ burden? Then prove yourself.”
I grit my teeth. Fire sparked in my veins where despair tried to settle.
I would not be anyone’s burden. Not even my own—not anymore.
I thought of all the visions that had been forced on me as a child.
All the terrible things I saw in Morhaven, the wrongness of it all.
The opportunity I now had to stand up and fight against it.
I struck again, and this time caught her off guard enough that she had to step back. Just a step, but it was mine.
Her grin was lethal, edged with approval. “That’s it. Blood in you, after all.”
By the time she called a break, my chest heaved and my muscles screamed. I collapsed onto a stone bench, dragging a hand across my sweat-slick brow. The courtyard buzzed with sparring, but for a moment, it was only my ragged breath and Mairenn’s voice.
She handed me a flask, smirk still in place. “Not bad, Aurenya. Not particularly good either. But not bad.”
I gulped water greedily, breath breaking. “You’re merciless.”
“Of course. I believe I’ve already told you it’s wasted only his place.” She rolled her eyes. “Mercy doesn’t make warriors, it creates corpses. My mother’s favorite phrase.”
I wiped my brow once more, my gaze flicking toward the balconies carved above the courtyard. Speaking of her mother…two figures stood there, commanding attention.
Tairngire stood tall with his arms folded, runes faintly lit under fresh leathers. His face was an unreadable mask from this distance, and beside him, Scáthae was radiant and imposing. Her very presence split the air in two. Together, they looked carved from the same realm of divine impossibility.
Which of course, they were.
My chest tightened as my mind flashed back to the night before—Tairngire’s breath ghosting my lips, fire coiling low, still unburned. And before that, in the clearing, when I’d been foolish enough to ask him about pleasure of all things.
My stomach dropped. Had he and Scáthae ever…the thought struck like a serpent, vile and bitter. She was a goddess, he a god. They weren’t bound by chains. The idea of them tangled together in passion churned through me, hot and raw. She could take what I could not.
And to think, I would have to spar with him hand-to-hand later…
“Aurenya!”
Mairenn’s voice cracked across the stones like a whip. I snapped my gaze down just in time to catch the training blade she tossed back. It slapped into my palms, heavy enough to sting.
Her smirk was wicked. “Don’t drift into your Sight or your sulks. In Caedmon’s courtyard, distraction gets you gutted.”
I tightened my grip, forcing the storm inside me into focus. “Then stop talking and spar with me.”
Her grin spread wide, all teeth and a challenge accepted. “Gladly.”
After Mairenn had thoroughly destroyed me, she led me through the corridors and into a room that put my hand-made gym in Anamcroí to shame.
There were various mats on the ground, blocks with handles that could be used as hand-weights.
There were bags filled with what appeared to be sand suspended from the ceiling in a corner.