Chapter 29
Later that Night
Raff
The last pan goes into the drying rack and I drop the dish towel over my shoulder, bracing both hands on the edge of the sink.
The kitchen smells like garlic and dish soap.
Somewhere upstairs, the pipes groan softly as Adam's shower runs, and from down the hall comes the occasional soft thud of drawers opening and closing as Elowen unpacks what little she brought from her apartment.
Cliff leans against the counter with his arms crossed, looking into the middle distance the way he does when he's turning something over.
Perrin is wiping down the stovetop with the focused energy of someone who needs something to do with his hands.
"She's been carrying that alone for three years," I say, because someone has to say it out loud.
"I know." Cliff's jaw shifts. "All while trying to hide what she really is."
Perrin sets the cloth down and turns around, leaning his hip against the counter. "That notebook." He shakes his head slowly. "She had so much in there."
"Yeah." I dry my hands on the dish towel. "And whoever she's looking for has had three years to disappear. They’re probably long gone, if not dead.”
Nobody says anything to that for a moment.
"We’ll still see what we can find," Cliff says eventually. "We’ll start with that pharmacy and go from there.” He pushes off the counter. "But that's tomorrow." He looks between me and Perrin. "Tonight I'm more concerned about Elowen."
"What about her?" I ask, though I already have a feeling I know where this is going.
"She shouldn't be alone tonight." He says it simply, like it's already decided. "She held it together all day, but that doesn't mean she's okay.” He looks at me.
"I'll take Adam," I offer. "He can sleep with me and you can—"
"I don't need a babysitter."
All three of us turn toward Adam’s voice.
The beta is standing in the kitchen doorway with damp hair and bare feet, wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and a faded shirt that's seen better days. His narrowed, honey-brown eyes move over us. He’s not happy.
Cliff looks at him steadily. "Nobody said you did."
"You were about to." Adam crosses the kitchen and opens the fridge, pulling out the juice carton and pouring himself a glass with the unhurried ease of someone making a point about how unbothered they are. "I could hear you coming down the stairs."
Perrin and I exchange a look.
"Do you want to sleep in my room tonight?" Cliff asks. "With me, Raff, and Elowen."
Adam is quiet for a moment, turning his glass slowly between his palms, staring down at it. "I don't know," he says finally. "I'm not sure I'm ready for that yet."
"Ready for what?" Cliff asks, his voice careful and even.
Adam looks up. "To see you with her." He says it simply, without self-pity or drama.
"I have no problem with her being in the pack,” he says quickly.
“And I mean that. I'm genuinely okay with it.
" He takes a sip of his juice. "I just need a little more time before I watch my alphas rut her. " He shrugs one shoulder. "That's all."
Cliff crosses to him without a word and leans down, pressing his lips to Adam's cheek, lingering there for a moment, and Adam's eyes close.
"Okay," Cliff says against his skin. "Take the time you need."
Adam nods, staring back down at his glass.
"I'll sleep in your room with you," Perrin says, pushing off the counter. "Like when we were kids. We can pull the mattress off the—"
"Perrin." Adam cuts him off with a pointed look. "I’m twenty-six years old."
"I know how old we are."
"Then stop treating me like I need a nightlight and a glass of warm milk." Adam makes a face, making it clear he doesn't want to be handled with kid gloves. "I'm fine. I simply want to sleep in my own bed by myself."
Perrin holds up both hands in a gesture of surrender that doesn't look remotely sincere. "I was simply offering."
"You were hovering," Adam says. "There's a difference."
"I'm not hovering. I'm standing in the damn kitchen."
"You've been hovering since we left Elowen's apartment, and you know it."
Perrin opens his mouth.
"And don't say you haven't," Adam adds, pointing at him, "because I will lose my mind."
Perrin closes his mouth. Then he looks at me and Cliff with an expression that says he finds this deeply unfair.
"He's not wrong," I say.
"Nobody asked you," Perrin cuts back.
I lean against the counter and cross my arms. "I mean, you did follow him into the bathroom twice today."
"I was checking on him." Perrin’s voice lifts an octave.
"That's hovering, baby," I say.
Perrin points the dish towel at me. "Don't call me baby while we’re arguing."
“Would you rather me fuck the argument out of you?” I smile, staring intently at Perrin’s flushed, pretty face.
“Stop it.” The beta tries like hell not to duck his head, but he ends up failing, smiling at his feet.
“I’m done with all of you tonight,” Adam says, setting his empty glass in the sink. "My bones hurt and I’m going to bed. Goodnight."
"Goodnight," Cliff says, and I can hear the smile in it even though his face stays straight.
"Sleep well," Perrin calls after his brother.
"Get out of my life," Adam calls back from the hallway, and then his footsteps disappear up the stairs.
The kitchen settles back into quiet.
Perrin stares at the doorway for a moment, then looks at us. "He's fine," he says, like he's trying to convince himself as much as anyone.
And I get it.
Even though we like to tease Perrin, we’ve all seen how Adam flocks to his twin when he’s feeling overwhelmed, and things have been a little intense lately.
"You want to sleep in the big bed tonight?" Cliff asks Perrin. “I’m sure she’d love to have you close.”
The flush along the back of Perrin’s neck moves forward fast, crawling up to his ears and across his cheekbones before he's managed to say a single word.
"I don't want to crowd her," he says, reaching for the dish towel and folding it with sudden intense focus.
"She's already dealing with a lot, and the last thing she needs is me taking up space—"
"Perrin." Cliff says the beta’s name softly.
“All I’m saying is that she probably needs room to—"
"Omegas need closeness from their pack," Cliff says simply. "Especially right now. You wouldn't be crowding anyone."
Perrin nods, his eyes fixed on the dish towel in his hands. "Right. No, I know that." He nods again. "That makes sense. I just don't want her to think I expect her to…." He grimaces as he whispers, "sleep with me."
"Really?" I lean against the counter and cross my arms. "But you already fucked her at the Morder.”
His head snaps up so fast I'm surprised he doesn't hurt himself.
"We did not." His voice comes out about an octave higher than usual.
"That is not what happened. It was a—" He stops, looks at Cliff, looks at me, then drops his voice to something barely above a whisper, his face going scarlet. "It was only a blow job."
The image that puts in my head is dirty, graphic, and deeply unhelpful for the current conversation.
All I can think about is Elowen’s pretty pink lips wrapped around Perrin’s perfect cock, sucking and moaning, with spit dripping down her chin, and Perrin's eyes squeezed tight.
I want him in that bed tonight so badly it hurts.
The thought of watching Cliff fuck Perrin into Elowen has my cock rock-fucking-hard. And it takes everything in me not to grab my dick and squeeze.
But I can’t dwell on it, because it’s not happening. Not tonight.
Perrin needs time to work up to real physical intimacy, and no amount of want on my end is going to speed that process up.
Hell, the man agonized for almost a full month before he let me kiss him. He moves at his own pace and always has, and the thing I've learned about Perrin over the years is that if you push him he digs in, but if you leave the door open, he'll eventually walk through it on his own terms.
It's how he's built.
"Whatever you want to do," Cliff says, letting it go without making Perrin say it out loud. “But know that you can change your mind and crawl into bed with us at any time.”
“I know.” Perrin finally sets the dish towel down. He looks between us, then up at the ceiling, then back at us. "I'm sleeping in your room," he says to me, and my brows lift, surprised.
“You can always sleep in my bed,” I say, making sure he knows that. “But what’s wrong with yours?”
Perrin pulls a face, like he’s shocked, and I suddenly feel like I’ve forgotten something very important. “Some asshole stole all my fucking bedding. Remember?”
I quickly grimace. "I can put it back. Give me two minutes."
"Don't." Perrin waves a hand, already moving toward the staircase. "It's fine." He pauses at the threshold, and something in his expression settles into something softer and more honest than the mild outrage from a second ago. "I like sleeping in your room anyway."
He says it simply, before heading up the stairs.
“Alright, alpha.” Cliff moves to the dishwasher and pushes it shut with his knee, hitting the start button. It hums to life beneath the counter. He straightens up, then looks at me with those dark eyes. "Ready for bed?"
My still hard cock twitches.
I should be ashamed at how horny I am right now, but it's not entirely my fault.
Alphas are built to respond when their mates are hurting.
It's comfort instinct twisted up with desire, and after a day like today, with Elowen's grief sitting heavy on all of us and Adam's quiet struggle coupled with Perrin being so goddamn sweet about all of it, my body has been running hot for hours with nowhere to put it.
"Let’s go," I say, then I follow Cliff up the stairs and down the hall.
We pass the thin line of light under Perrin's door, and past the soft sounds of movement coming from Adam’s room.