Chapter 26 Sabrina #2
My reaction told me one thing: I still loved him. I was always going to love him.
“Damn you, Liam,” I whispered under my breath as I pushed off the door and made my way over to the mirror. Thankfully, I hadn’t put on makeup yet, because as I sectioned out my uncurled hair, tears began to slip down my cheeks.
I hated that I was so quick to cry over him. I hated that I’d let myself fall for a man I was never going to have. And I hated that he hadn’t come after me. It had been a week, and he was living his best life, catching bad guys and everything.
“It’s not fair,” I said as I picked up my curling iron and focused on my hair.
By the time my hair was done and my makeup was on, I had control over my emotions again.
The tears were dry, and I was determined not to cry over Liam again.
I’d seen him on the TV, and then Abigail and I had a momentary bout of insanity when we thought he was knocking on the door.
But that was never going to happen again.
I was determined that today would be the funeral of our relationship. He was dead and buried to me.
My future started now.
* * *
Isabelle was all chatter as soon as I got to the library. She moved through the aisles of books, pointing out a few changes she’d made, interspersed with the latest Harmony Island drama.
Apparently, my sudden departure, mixed with my picture in the tabloids, had this town talking, and Isabelle didn’t hold back as she recounted everything she’d heard. “And I told Mrs. Pretty that I could not violate your trust by giving her any details,” Isabelle said, her gaze pinned on me.
We were standing in the children’s section of the library.
She’d pointed out the two new colorful kid chairs, which had been delivered the day before, before getting to this bit of gossip.
I shifted my gaze from the green chair to the red one and then glanced back over to Isabelle when she didn’t continue.
Her expression looked curious, and I wasn’t quite sure what she was getting at.
Did she want me to tell her about what had happened with Liam?
I adored my boss, but she was chatty. I was sure she meant well, but there were only so many times she could say, “I really shouldn’t be telling you this” and “swear you won’t tell another soul” before she’d told every single person in town.
So I just gave her an appreciative smile. “Thanks. I’m glad you kept everything on lockdown.”
Isabelle didn’t hide her disappointment. Her smile faltered as she drew her eyebrows together. Maybe someday I’d be comfortable enough to recount the entire story to her, but not today. Not with my wound still bleeding. Not when it physically hurt me to say his name.
“So what’s the book we’re talking about tonight?” I asked, hoping to get her to move on.
She paused. I could see her desire to push me for more information flash through her gaze before she sighed and waved for me to follow. “Wuthering Heights.”
“Oh,” I said. I hadn’t touched that book since senior-year lit, but I was sure I could find a good reader discussion list online.
“The ladies are excited to have you back,” she said as she led me over to the front desk.
There was something nostalgic about the space, but, at the same time, being here shattered my broken heart further.
This was the first place where I’d truly felt like myself again after becoming a mom.
This desk had been the first place Abigail, Trevor, or even Samuel couldn’t touch. It was the place I’d finally felt free.
It was also the first place I’d met Liam.
I could still see him smiling down at me as he stood in front of the desk, asking me about Cole.
I wanted to laugh at the memory of my confusion, thinking that Cole was an author or a character in a book, but I just wasn’t there yet.
Maybe someday I could look back with fondness, but not today.
“I’m excited to meet with them again,” I said as I turned to smile at her.
I hoped that Isabelle didn’t notice the lull in our conversation as I stared at the front desk, reminiscing about Liam, but I’d hoped in vain. She was laser-focused on me as if she expected me to suddenly burst out in song as I regaled her with my time as an assistant to a rockstar.
She was going to be disappointed.
I kept our conversation light while she packed up her bags and then turned off the lights in her office. She lingered by the front desk for a few seconds past six, but I just smiled at her before I bounced a few times in the chair.
“Have a good night,” I offered. She just sighed, adjusted the strap of her bag on her shoulder, and returned the sentiment.
The library fell quiet once the door shut behind her.
I took in a deep breath and leaned back against the headrest. Eventually, my story would be old news, and everyone would move on.
Stories were always blown out of proportion in this small town, but they would quickly lose steam once a new one popped up.
I just had to focus on staying sane until that happened.
Thankfully, the ladies at book club didn’t ask me where I’d disappeared to or what had happened with Liam. I could tell that they had questions, but they kept them to themselves or whispered them to each other when they thought I couldn’t hear them.
I kept the conversation on Heathcliff and the moors and didn’t let the topic wander.
We were a half hour into the meeting when my phone vibrated. I chose to ignore it. Samuel was with Abigail and Bash. If there was an issue, she’d call back. My body began to relax once the vibrating stopped, but that only lasted a second before the vibrations started again.
This person had met my it’s an emergency bar, so I nodded to Jenny, who was currently talking, and hurried down one of the aisles while pulling out my phone. I glanced down, half expecting to see it was Abigail calling, and frowned when Isabelle’s name popped up.
I quickly accepted the call and brought the phone to my cheek. “Isabelle?” I asked.
“Sabrina?” Isabelle sounded out of breath, like she’d been running.
“Yeah.” I paused. “Is everything okay?”
“Are you at the library?”
I glanced around, wondering what was happening. “Yeah,” I said slowly. Had someone told her I wasn’t here? “I’m here with the book club.”
She exhaled. “Oh, good. Okay. Just checking.”
I frowned. Was she worried that I was going to skip town again? I thought I’d been clear when I got back that Harmony was my home. I was ready to dedicate myself to this island and the library. Did she doubt that?
“I’m really grateful that you gave me this opportunity again,” I hurried to say, just so she knew where my loyalty lay.
“I know. You’re good,” she said. “Have a good night.”
The way she said “good” confused me, but she’d hung up before I could dig further. I stared at my dark phone screen as I tried to process our conversation. Deciding that she was probably out running an errand or…actually running, I slipped my phone into my back pocket and rejoined the ladies.
Janice had brought snacks, and the women ate and lingered for about fifteen minutes past the end of book club, then they all started filing out of the library.
Once Phyllis was picked up, I flipped the lock on the door and made my way over to the circle of chairs we’d used and started to put them away.
I was halfway done with the circle when the scraping noise of the intercom sounded from above me. I screamed, grabbing my chest and whipping my gaze up to the speaker.
“If loving you is violence. Let it leave me ruined. Blessed.” Liam’s voice filled the empty library.
I stood there, frozen. In all of my years watching two thousand slasher movies, I knew singing to their victim was not the usual tactic.
“Hello?” I called out. If this was a killer, they were good. They knew how to disarm me. Use my favorite musician’s music against me.
Liam’s voice came again, this time not singing a Drifter song. “This is silly. Can’t I just go talk to her?”
My heart started to pound. Was Liam…here?
“It’s romantic. Keep going,” Isabelle demanded.
I was thoroughly confused. I abandoned the chairs and started making my way toward Isabelle’s office.
I wanted to believe that Liam was here. That he’d come back for me.
But I was physically incapable of allowing myself to even fantasize about that.
The last time I’d convinced myself that Liam was standing on the other side of a door, it had been Bob, the owner of a moving company.
I wasn’t sure I could survive two disappointments in one day.
Isabelle’s office door was shut, but the light was on. Another Drifter song had started over the intercom, and I just stood there, willing myself to see if he was really here. Finally, I wrapped my fingers around the door handle and pulled.