Chapter 9
NINE
cheyenne
“I don’t understand it,” Blair said. “Nothing from him all week? Not even a text message?”
“Nothing.”
We were on the phone, me in my room packing my bags, and Blair already up at Cloverleigh Farms. It was Thursday afternoon, which meant a whole week had gone by since the Thanksgiving night kiss.
A kiss I’d been dreaming about since I was twelve years old. A kiss I’d never forget as long as I lived. A kiss I’d replayed in my head, over and over again, every single night since he’d walked out of the kitchen.
“I don’t understand it,” she said again.
“I do.” I added a stack of bras and underwear to my suitcase. “He told me flat out that we needed to slow down, that he felt like things were moving too fast.”
“Yeah, but there’s a difference between slowing down and slamming on the brakes. All you did was kiss!”
“Yeah, but that was a huge deal for us,” I said.
“This isn’t like I just met someone random at a bar and he brought me home and kissed me.
This is Cole.” I placed a pair of jeans and two sweaters into the suitcase.
“He’s not like anyone else. And he’s too good a guy to feed me bullshit.
He doesn’t want to start something he can’t finish, and I don’t want to be that girl clinging to blind hope for the rest of my life.
He was honest with me, and I respect that. ”
“Maybe he was just really busy this week,” Blair said brightly. “I told you he put an offer in on that old house by the creek, right?”
“You did, and I’m excited for him. But he and I have talked about moving out a lot, so I kind of thought he might tell me about it himself.
” I caught sight of my reflection in the mirror and glared at it.
“See? This is the problem with me. I say I’m not going to get my hopes up, and then I do.
I say I’m okay with things, and then I’m not.
I pick unavailable people, and then I wonder why I get disappointed. ”
“Grr, it’s so maddening,” said Blair. “Any idiot could see the way he was staring at you at Thanksgiving.”
I went back to packing, purposefully tossing in some pajamas that were not sexy in the least. “Thanksgiving was a good time. But I think it scared him.”
She sighed. “Has your mom forgiven you for the plate?”
“Who knows? She says she’s not mad, but she’s been weird this week.”
“Weird like how?”
“I don’t know. Just quiet. But I feel like she’s looking at me and silently judging. Wondering what I did wrong with Cole. Why he doesn’t want me.” I squeezed my eyes shut. “Or maybe that’s me projecting.”
“Has she asked about him?”
“No,” I admitted, tucking some socks into my suitcase. “Tell me again how dressy I need to be for the rehearsal dinner.”
“I thought you had an outfit planned already.”
“I did, but now I don’t know if I’m in the right mood for it.” I sank onto my bed and stared at the black dress hanging on the back of my closet door. “Maybe it’s too sexy.”
“It’s not.”
“I can’t wear a bra with it.”
“What are you, my grandma?”
“And it’s tight.”
“It shows off your fantastic body!”
I sighed. “What if it looks like I’m trying too hard?”
“Cheyenne. Stop. If anything, Cole is going to spend the entire night drooling over you and kicking himself for ignoring you all week.”
“I doubt that.”
“You didn’t see what I saw on Thanksgiving. When he watched you come down those stairs, he lit up like he had fireflies under his skin. I’ve never seen anything like it. Wear the damn dress.”
I smiled, despite everything. “I’ll at least bring it.”
“What time are you leaving?”
“Soon, I hope. It would be great to get up there before the snow starts.”
“Oh God, don’t talk about the snow. Do you really think we’re going to get as much as they’re saying?”
“I hope not.” The forecast was dire—we were supposed to get about six inches of snow by tonight and something like another foot and a half by Saturday morning.
Blair was terrified the weather was going to prevent people from being able to make it to the wedding.
Not only were lots of people driving up from Bellamy Creek, but her family was flying in from Nashville. “When do your parents arrive?”
“Their flight is supposed to leave first thing tomorrow.”
“Are you excited to see them?”
“Yes and no.” Blair laughed. “I haven’t let my mother near my wedding plans, so she’ll be sure to have plenty to say about all the things I’m doing wrong, but that’s okay. The whole reason I left that life behind was because I didn’t want to live by anyone else’s rules or traditions.”
Blair had been brought up a wealthy, blue-blooded debutante, but her family had lost all its money after her father took some bad advice and wound up being convicted of tax evasion.
But rather than marry rich just to live in luxury again like her mother wanted her to, she’d chosen a different path.
She’d been on her way to her new life when her car broke down in Bellamy Creek.
“Well, I’m excited to meet them,” I said, determined to focus on the bright side. “What are you guys up to this afternoon?”
“We’re meeting with the wedding planner at four-thirty to go over some final details, and then we’ve got a dinner reservation at six. I’m just waiting for Griff to get out of the shower, so we can get going.”
“Hey, does Griffin . . . know? About Cole and me?”
“He definitely thinks something was up between you guys last week, but I didn’t tell him any specifics. It’s weird, because you’re his sister. He’s said a hundred times that he wishes Cole would get back out there, but he can’t exactly be like, ‘dude, Cheyenne’s into you, you should hit that.’”
I frowned. “Ew. Gross.”
Blair laughed. “But Cole’s his best friend. I’m sure he’d be happy to see you together.”
“Never going to happen,” I said, willing it to sink in once and for all. “I’ve always known it.”
“You never know. Maybe this weekend will change things. Weddings are romantic occasions.”
“I know.”
“I’ll see you later tonight. Drive carefully, okay?”
“I will.”
We hung up, and I slipped the black dress and my crimson velvet bridesmaid dress into a garment bag.
For a moment, I stood there, touching the velvet bodice, imagining Cole in his suit, his arms around me on the dance floor.
That was probably as good as it was going to get.
My mother remained uncharacteristically quiet on the drive up to Cloverleigh Farms. I finally asked her about it, even though I was worried the answer was going to be something like, I’m just so happy for your brother, but I can’t help wondering when you’re going to find the one.
“Something on your mind, Mom?”
She sighed. “Not really.”
I gritted my teeth. “I can tell there’s something. You haven’t said a word since we left home. And you’ve been giving me the silent treatment all week. Are you still mad about the plate?”
“The what?” My mother seemed genuinely confused for a moment. “Oh—no. It’s not that.”
“What is it?”
She stared out the passenger side window a moment. “I miss your dad. He should be here for this.”
Immediately, I felt horrible. Of course she was missing my dad.
We all were. Griffin and I had talked about it at Thanksgiving, how sad we were that he’d miss all these big moments in our lives—weddings and babies being born and every milestone afterward—as well as just being around for the little moments, like Sunday dinners and telling dad jokes and the occasional beer after work.
I shook my head, ashamed I’d assumed her silence this week had been about me. “You’re right. He should be, and I miss him too.”
We were both quiet then, reliving our memories of a man who’d worked so hard all his life, loved his family so fiercely, and had deserved the easy retirement surrounded by grandchildren he never got. A heart attack had stolen everything from him—and him from us—six years ago.
“He’d like Blair, don’t you think?” I asked, attempting to lighten the mood.
“Oh, definitely.” My mother nodded. “But who wouldn’t?”
“It’s so incredible, the way they found each other, isn’t it? I mean, what are the chances that your soul mate is the mechanic who fixes your car after you get stranded in his town?”
“Probably about the same as your soul mate being the boy next door who’s been there all along,” she said breezily.
“Mom, don’t start. I told you. We’re—”
“Just friends. I know. Because he doesn’t date.”
“Exactly.”
“Although, I did hear the strangest rumor about Cole at the dry cleaners the other day.”
“You did?”
“Yes. Someone said they’d heard he’d recently come out as gay and was in a relationship with Enzo Moretti.”
I burst out laughing. “What? That’s ridiculous!”
She laughed too. “Apparently they were seen looking for a house together.”
“That’s because Enzo is helping Cole find a house for him and Mariah to move into.”
“Oh. Well, that makes more sense.” She paused. “But if he was gay, that would explain why he isn’t interested in you.”
“Mom. He’s not gay.”
She sighed. “Fine.” A minute later, she chuckled. “But they would make a handsome couple, don’t you think?”
“Definitely.” I laughed again too, then turned my windshield wipers on. “Looks like the snow is starting.”
“Oh, dear,” my mother fretted. “I wish they’d chosen a venue closer to home.”
“Well, Blair had her heart set on Cloverleigh Farms. And maybe they’re overestimating how much we’ll get. That happens all the time.”
My mother crossed herself. “I hope you’re right.”
But the snow fell steadily for the rest of the drive, thicker and heavier the farther north we got. I white-knuckled the steering wheel of my Honda, ramrod in my seat, glad I’d let Griffin talk me into new tires this year.