Chapter 20
20
R AIN
I never thought this day would come.
It’s ten in the morning when I pull up my car in front of my parents’ home, my stomach tied in knots.
I slip into the house, dreading having to face my mom.
I head straight to my room, praying for a miracle. Footsteps rush out of the kitchen, trailing me.
“Rain?”
I turn around.
“Can you come here for a minute?” my mother says, her voice lined with concern.
I follow her into the kitchen, still dressed in my evening gown, my pulse racing.
She motions me to the chair.
I sense she has been hurt.
She also seems detached.
“Why would you do that to me, Rain?”
“Do what, Mom?”
She studies me, the sadness in her eyes affecting me greatly.
Strangely, there’s so much coldness in her eyes. And then I realize... That’s how she's coped with things she didn’t like her whole life.
That’s how she’s avoided the inconvenient truths.
Maybe she had suspected something about my father and was aware of my sister’s doings, yet she’s always lived in denial.
Looking from the outside, we look like the perfect family––well-off, living in a beautiful house.
In reality, things are far from perfect.
Occasionally, we share dinners and love the comfort of our home, but our hearts are never here.
We have secrets––significant parts of our lives––that we hide from others, and we are rarely home together.
How miserable can Daria be if she wants me down so she can feel good about herself?
What has she missed in her personal life? And what makes her think that I have it?
“Why would you get involved with this man, Rain?”
“What man?” I ask, trying to buy some time and gather my thoughts.
“James Sexton.”
“What is wrong with him?” I ask, pretending I don’t understand what she’s hinting at.
“Everything. He’s not for you, sweetie.”
Emotions choke me as I process her words.
Why can’t she be my mom without judging me and making me feel guilty and miserable for my choices?
“What are you talking about?” I ask in a shaky voice.
“He’s older than you.”
“He’s a young man, Mom. Dad is much older than you, and Nat is much older than Daria.”
Her eyes dip to her hands.
“He’s the kind of man who breaks a woman’s heart, Rain.”
A voice screams in my head.
What about Dad?
Isn’t he breaking people’s hearts?
She slowly shakes her head before she continues.
“He’s a young, very powerful man who’s not used to settling down, being loyal, or being held accountable. He’s not looking for a long-term relationship, and you must know it. You can’t throw your life away because of a man’s good looks.”
“It’s not because of his good looks.”
“Yes, it is. You know it is. And it’s also his money and his power. But they’re not yours. And one day, he’ll want someone different than you. He’ll forget about you and move on because that’s what they do. Then you’ll be crushed and feel used, and you won’t be able to love anyone else. He’ll leave you broken, sweetie. And that thing alone will kill your heart and steal your innocence,” she says as if talking about her life.
A lump forms in my throat.
“I can’t stop seeing him, Mom.”
Displeasure sets on her face, her eyes suddenly going blank.
“Well, I can’t stop you from doing that, but your father might. I expect you to tell him the news before Daria does.”
With that, she pushes to her feet and walks out of the kitchen, leaving me to face the difficult reality alone.
* * *
JAMES
“Alexander Harrington is here, Sir.”
“Thanks, Lynn. Let him in.”
Lex ambles into my office, his azure shirt and silver tie bringing out his blue eyes.
He slides into a leather armchair across from my desk and tips his gaze at me.
I can tell it’s not good news by the look in his eyes.
“What’s the story, Lex?”
“Nothing’s changed, I’m afraid. The outcome depends on that one last vote. Sheryl Lieberman. We either have someone else, or we risk losing everything.”
“It’s a zoning change proposal.”
“It’s a commercial Casino and Entertainment Resort. For some people, it’s like building an obelisk to honor porn.”
I lean back in my chair, my hands clasped behind my neck.
He speaks again.
“You know better than mixing business with pleasure. You have so much material on the Morgans I’d be surprised if their cat is clean if they have one. I’m sure Daryl Morgan could be nudged a little. Besides, I find it hypocritical that he’s the one voicing a different opinion when he’s also the one who can’t get enough entertainment on the side.”
“I want to date his daughter, for fuck’s sake,” I blurt.
“Do you?”
I pull a cigarette out, slip it between my lips, ball up the empty packet, and throw it into the garbage bin.
I flip the metallic lighter open and light the cigarette.
“You know the story, Lex. It’s fucking for me, but it’s dating for them, now that they know about it,” I say, tossing the lighter onto my desk.
I tilt back in my chair.
“She’s more than fucking to you, James,” he says, studying my eyes.
I blow out the smoke.
“Yes, she is. That’s why it matters to me. I can’t just blackmail him and then invite him out to dinner.”
“Well, there’s not enough time to charm him into it. We need his vote by Wednesday.”
I take another drag and exhale slowly, holding his eyes.
Pondering.
“If this blows up in my face, I’ll lose her,” I say.
“No, you won’t. She might cry and sulk a little, but she’ll come back to you. In time, she’ll see things differently.”
I shake my head.
“You don’t know her. She has a strong heart and believes in this shit. Love, family. She has this idyllic view of life and the world in general. Besides, she’s never been hurt or scarred, so she’s not used to pain or knows how to forgive and forget. I’m perfect for her right now, but if I hurt her, she has enough power in her to pull away from me. And trust me… It’s stronger than her lust for me.”
A shadow darkens his eyes.
“You didn’t make up that shit, James. That’s her father and her sister, and God bless them, her brother-in-law. She’ll understand. If not, maybe she’s not the woman for you, and you’ll lose her one way or another. She needs to know who you are and what you do. And you need to know that she accepts you for who you are. Otherwise, you’ll only have another babe on your arm.”
I blow the smoke out, narrowing my eyes at him as he speaks again.
“Besides, I don’t think he’ll open his mouth. He’s not that stupid… Is she home?” he asks.
“Yeah...”
“You don’t sound too happy,” he says.
“That’s because I’m fucking not. Didn’t I say I’d never fuck a virgin?”
“Yeah, you did,” he says, cracking a smile.
“Now you know why.”
“So what’s the problem with her?”
I take a long drag, blow the smoke to the side and rest my elbows on my desk, locking his eyes.
“The problem is that she doesn’t want my money.”
“Hmm... That’s something new,” he says.
“Yeah... The other problem is that she needs it, yet she doesn’t want to depend on me, and for now, she can’t be on her own, so that’s pretty much it. You know the rest...”
He looks at me for a few moments.
“She needs to grow up, James, and she has to do it on her own. You can’t do it for her, but you can rush the process by not sheltering her or hiding the truth. She needs to grow claws and fangs and lose the romantic view of life if she wants to be with you.”
I smile bitterly.
“Yeah... I know.”
“It will not be easy. So buckle up. It’s going to be a hell of a ride,” he says, pushing out of his chair as I pick up my phone.
“I’ll see you tonight,” he adds before leaving the room.
I press the intercom button.
“Lynn, I need a business dinner with Daryl Morgan. Tomorrow. At Stern’s.”
* * *
RAIN
No cars have passed by for the past thirty minutes.
Perched on a bench, I glance down the road, flashbacks of the past coming back to me.
A year ago, Eve and I sat on this bench, desperately waiting for the return of the Kings.
And here we are today.
“Hey.”
Eve waves at me as she glides closer and drops her bicycle next to mine.
“This thing never gets old,” she says, a smile glinting in her eyes.
I take in her grin and beautiful face, unable to say a word.
“Why are you sad?”
“I’m not,” I say, pushing back my emotions. “In fact, I have some good news,” I murmur.
She takes a seat next to me.
“I spoke to Joanna, and she offered me the job. I can start next week. And I also talked to the person who needed a roommate, and I can move in any time I want.”
“That’s awesome,” she says enthusiastically before noticing the sorrow in my eyes. “I think…” she adds.
Her face darkens.
“Or you can move in with James Sexton,” she jokes, trying to cheer me up.
Silently, I look down.
“I’m so sorry... Did you tell him?” she asks, touching my arm.
I sway my head from side to side.
“No.”
“Shit. That’s not good, Rain…”
“It is what it is,” I say, still averting my eyes.
A few moments pass.
“Are you sure moving to New York will be good for you?” she asks softly, her hand sliding over mine. “Maybe you should wait until your book is released, and perhaps things will change after that.”
I shake my head again.
“I can’t wait. And things won’t change anyway. My father doesn’t know yet, but once I tell him about James, he’ll be against him. And if I go against my parents’ wishes, I’ll need to support myself, which I’m trying to do regardless of how this story goes. If I don’t do that, I'll need to rely on James, live with him, and force myself into his life. I might not have much experience, but I can’t think of a faster way to get him bored with me. Me depending entirely on him would make me undesirable at some point. On top of that, I have to deal with my sister and her stupid theatrics.”
“She’s a bully. You shouldn’t let her affect your life. You should push back.”
“I do. But she does affect my life because I can’t stop her.”
She makes a dismissive gesture.
“Bullies will be bullies… At least stop thinking about her so much. It’s not worth it… So when do you plan to talk to your dad?”
“I have to tell him before the end of the week, or Daria will. He just got back from a business trip, so I’m waiting for a good moment.”
“There’s no such thing.”
“I know.”
“What about James?”
“He’s not going to be happy,” I murmur, a bad feeling hovering over me.