11. Chapter Eleven
Chapter Eleven
E ven before they come and fetch me for the tribunal, I sense it is time.
The ship falls into a dead silence. There’s no laughter, no singing, no boots drumming the deck.
No Lark checking on me every so often. Even the sea around us has gone quiet, though that‘s not unusual for the Sea of Renewal.
The silence is heavy with contemplation.
Grim seems to appear in front of my cell with a deep frown line between his hazel eyes. The fact that he seems worried does nothing to ease my anxiety. I have been on edge all night. I didn’t sleep a wink last night at all.
Even though Sable told me to avoid the ghost, I’ve been secretly hoping he’d visit me again.
Besides Lark, he’s the closest thing I have to a friend on this ship, his generosity not transactional as everyone else’s seems to be.
I don’t mistake Sable for a friend, but he hasn’t been as cruel as I expected.
When I first told him what I am, I thought he’d toss me overboard without hesitation.
Instead, he later trusted me with his ship and his crew, even let me sleep in his cabin. And then there are the dresses.
Then there‘s Grim. He carefully unlocks the door to my cell while I pick at the hem of my dress. It’s the emerald gown the ghost gifted me.
It’s still a little damp from yesterday, but it reminds me of my mother, and I need a hit of saltwater, so I put it on anyway.
If I’m drowning today, at least that gives me a little comfort before the end.
“It’s very important that you accept the decision when it’s made, Eryse. No matter what it is. The tribunal is not just a meaningless tradition. It’s enforced by the sea.” Grim puts the keys back into his pockets and opens the rusty door to my cell, the metal moving with a low metallic groan.
Taking a deep breath, I straighten my posture and hold my chin up high. A gesture I have repeated countless times to convince myself that I am not afraid. But my fast-beating heart betrays me, and so does the shiver running down my spine.
“I understand,” I finally manage to say through the knot that has formed in my throat.
Without another word, Grim reaches for my elbow, and I follow him out of my cell without a fight. I can’t use my hum. I can’t fight them all without it either. So the last thing I can hope for is that the sea shows mercy at last.
The sun is so bright that I have to squint as he opens the door to the main deck.
He leads me toward the mast in the middle of the ship.
With every step I take, the space around me seems to close in, the distance to the mast shrinking too quickly.
Death looms over me, greedy, ready to take me as its prize.
I try to hold onto the thought that I can endure this, that I have endured worse.
But I haven’t. I have never been in a situation that feels this… final.
It’s the first time I’ve seen the whole crew gathered together.
They’re standing in a half circle around the mast. Looking to my left and right, I search for a way out, for some last chance I have missed.
Do something. Run. The closer we get, the louder it becomes – that voice telling me to do anything but step into the place where they will decide my fate.
Finally, my survival instinct takes over.
My feet slow. If I walk into that circle, I am handing myself over.
I can’t. Before fully realizing what I am doing, I plant my feet into the ground and refuse to take another step toward certain death.
Strong hands grab me and pull me forward against my will.
Panic hits me like a punch in my guts, rising up my throat until it tears free–
“No!”
My scream fills the otherwise silent air, and Grim instantly covers his ears in reflex.
The tone is high and echoes around us on the open sea.
As I look around, the rest of the men are grimacing and covering their ears as well.
Without intending to, I have used my siren magic on them.
The dizziness in my head is undeniable proof.
I regret it as soon as it happens. As the echo of my shrill scream fades, I see the darkness of hatred in their eyes. My eyes snap to the smallest pirate in the crowd. Lark.
There’s fear in his eyes. He stands next to his father with a hand on his little cutlass, ready to draw it to defend himself. My stomach twists and turns, and for a moment, I am scared I might throw up.
The circle closes around me as Grim ties me to the mast. No one speaks a word, and that makes the panic within me rise even further. They seem to be waiting for something. No, not something. Someone.
“Crew of the Noctis.”
I look up to find Sable standing on the quarterdeck above, dressed all in black, his black hair peeking out beneath his tricorn hat.
He stands proud and sure under the blazing sun as the crew turns to listen to their captain.
The authority radiating from him is strong enough to make my knees buckle, and for the first time, I understand why they chose him as their captain.
“We are gathered here today to hold the tribunal. As it is stated in the Black Code of Free Ships, every intruder aboard a ship must face the tribunal. The crew decides their fate by democracy.”
Murmurs start around me, some praising the code, some the sea — the entity we all live by.
Sable makes his way down and takes the last spot in the half-circle across from me. His eyes, burning straight through me. I look away. The barrier of denial and confidence I have carefully built and maintained over the last few days crumbles away slowly but surely.
The edges of my vision blur. Sounds bleed together, voices turning distant and warped, as if I’m underwater already. My hands are numb, my chest too tight to draw a proper breath. I know I’m still standing, but it feels like I’m not fully here anymore.
“Eryse.” I feel his hand on my cheek, turning my face toward the body suddenly blocking the sun in front of me.
I obey and look into his kohl-rimmed eyes, the tears now threatening to swell. I swallow them down. The decision has not been made, yet here I am, already crying. No wonder the sea doesn‘t want me. I am so weak.
His thumb presses against my skin, just enough to anchor me, preventing me from drifting away further into the panic.
My breath stutters once, then again, before evening out.
Sable doesn’t tear his gaze away and watches me with intent.
His brows draw together, as if the sight of me unsettles him.
He stays close, his hand steady against my cheek until the blur at the edges of my vision settles and the world comes back into focus.
“Go on,” I whisper, and he hesitates. Finally, his hand slips away, the tenderness of his touch leaving me.
He takes back his place in the half-circle and clears his throat.
“The siren boarded the ship without permission. She compelled Lark.”
The crew grows uneasy and anxious, spitting insults toward my kind and talking about revenge.
“Quiet!” Sable’s voice carries over them all, sharp and steady, and the crew goes silent in an instant.
I hold my breath.
“We will start the questioning now. Grim?”
Grim hesitates before stepping forward, eyes dropping for a heartbeat before lifting to meet mine.
“Why did you board this ship?”
I shake my head, and my breath stutters to a stop as the question sinks in.
I didn‘t know that there’d be a questioning.
I thought they would vote and get it over with.
I try to remember, but where the memory should be, there is just a hollow, aching blank space.
I cannot answer any of their questions. I don’t remember how I ended up on this ship, nor do I remember what I wanted here.
“I don’t know.” My words are nothing more than a whisper. It does not go down well with the crew.
“And what were your intentions in boarding this ship?”
“I don‘t remember, but—“
“This is ridiculous,” someone spits and steps into the circle, breaking the tension. That thick-necked man. Rat. “She didn’t wander aboard. She came for us. To kill us. And you know what bloody sirens bring!”
Others nod in agreement, and murmurs become shouts. Again, Sable raises his voice.
“Silence, you unruly whelps! You forget the bloody sea we’re in. She was on deck yesterday. The sea took from her. I saw it with my own eyes. She boarded the ship because she was running away from siren hunters.”
“Are you defending the wench?” Rat spits and takes another step toward the captain.
“I am making this a fair process, as the code demands it.” Unspoken words pass between the men as they stare at each other. “Now,” he starts, dragging every word. “Get back in your place.” Silence follows, but in the end, Rat obeys and returns to his place.
I let go of the breath I’ve been holding.
“It’s true,” I manage to say. “I don‘t remember why I’m on this ship. The sea took it from me. I had a wound that was mended, and we all know the price we pay for that. I can assure you of one thing, and that is I don’t mean any harm.”
Tears sting my eyes. One of them slips out of the corner of my eye and wets my cheek.
“I am more human than I am a siren.” It’s more a confession than a statement. “I compelled Lark to survive. That‘s it.”
“She’s right.”
My head snaps toward the young pirate, and a smile tugs at my lips. Lark is speaking in my favor.
“I would’ve done the same in her situation.
And yesterday, I was scared of the maelstroms. She could’ve used her tricks on me, but she didn’t.
” Lark says quietly, avoiding eye contact and shifting his weight from one foot to the other.
His father puts a hand on his shoulder and squeezes it to encourage him to continue.
He swallows and does so in an unsteady voice.