31. Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-One
T here are a lot of things that I would like to do right now, and letting myself into the captain’s cabin is not one of them. Not even the sea itself could get me to go after him now like a whelp. If he can act as if none of this ever happened, then I can too.
Grunting, I push my shoulder against the door and turn the iron handle.
Sable’s cabin looks like it did before, though someone has carried the lanterns back outside.
With my hands curled into fists, I stride towards the wooden shelves that dozens of books rest upon.
The colors have faded from most of them, a clear sign that they have been here for quite a while.
This is going to be difficult, considering the fact that I cannot read.
But I’ll be damned if I don’t at least try.
I sigh and take the book that Sable showed me before from its shelf, along with a few others that look similar enough to be helpful.
The heavy-looking, worn working desk in front of the stained-glass window looks exactly like the right place to get to work, so I carefully place the books between the clutter and sit down in the red leather chair that rests in front of it.
The desk is crowded with journals, each covered with a thin piece of leather. Ink pads, bottles, and pens are scattered across it, along with the odd golden coin and a few bone charms. He really must like those charms.
Shaking my head, I try to get my mind free of the captain and open the book I know has the sirens in it.
From looking at the drawings it explains the different types of sirens that live in the Six Seas.
The Sea of Dreams siren looks delicate, ethereal, and not obviously dangerous — but I know from personal experience with my swarm that sirens usually are.
The next page shows a sleeping sailor, and right next to him, a skull, which must symbolize death.
I sigh. We really should’ve turned to the next page.
As that was the last entry about this sea, I take the next book and flip through the thin, fragile pages. This one has fewer drawings, and more writing, which makes it harder for me to understand anything.
Dream.
Wind.
Squinting my eyes as though it’ll help me understand the words better, I flip to the next page. There are more long words that I do not understand, and my inability to read has never felt more painfully inconvenient than it does now. I turn the page again.
Wait. I know this word.
Water
Then, a few lines below, another familiar word.
Current.
Underneath it, there’s a small drawing of a ship that glides through water.
Biting down on my lip, I try to make sense of any of this. We know that the sea will lull you into a dream, or better, a nightmare, and that will kill you if you do not realize it soon enough. The body can only survive so long without water or food. There’s no wind to move the ship to safety.
But there‘s a current. There’s always a current.
Maybe the ship can be moved with it if it's strong enough. That would explain the drawing of the ship. But what that drawing doesn’t tell me is how to find out where the currents are.
The water surface looks calm, almost like a mirror, likely hiding what’s going on under the surface.
I flip through the remaining pages, looking for any clue that will tell me more about the currents, but the word does not appear on the page again.
Sighing, I lean back against the soft, red leather of the chair.
I guess there’s only one way to find out where the currents are the strongest. I have to look for them myself.
I take the books and hurry back to the main deck. I do not look Sable in the eyes as I press the books against his broad chest moments later, forcing a grunt from him.
The words spill out of me like a waterfall. “Read them for me. There must be strong currents here, at least I think there should be. I will get into the water and—“
“Risa,” He takes the books from me and furrows his dark brows together. “Slow down. On which page did you read this?”
“None,” I mumble, heat crawling towards my head. Instead of looking at him, I stare at the deck, counting knots in the wood. “I think it’s written there, and I would like you to confirm this for me.”
Sable studies me for a moment, trying to make sense of my words. As realization hits him, he shifts his weight from one foot to the other.
“Aye,” he simply says. “I will go through them again.”
My head snaps up, surprise breaking through the shame I was hiding behind, as my eyes find his. There’s no judgment in them, no bitterness. He does not mock me for it.
“And if you need help, we have one yawl ready that we can lower into the water. It’s small and faster than the longboat. Grim can accompany you.”
My mouth opens, then closes again. His trust in me makes my heart fill with warmth, and for a moment, it almost drowns out the disappointment still lingering beneath it.
Almost.
Because he still hasn’t said anything about the kiss or what he said to me about hope, as if he wanted it undone, as if it didn’t matter.
I draw in a slow breath and feel my shoulders tense.
“It‘s the easiest if I just swim by myself. After Lark, I need to recharge anyway.”
“Recharge?” he asks, the sharpness in his eyes dulling a little.
“Salt water. It fuels my powers.” I let out a breath. “Unless you want me to drown another man, that’s the only option.”
The words come out harsher than I intended, and I regret them instantly. He was the one taking care of me after I broke down that night. His brows pull together, and his jaw sets as he looks at me.
“I’m sorry,” I murmur, already turning on my heel, ready to stride off to not make things worse between us. “I better get going.”
His hand wraps around my wrist, turning me back towards him in one swift movement. My pulse jumps at the unexpected touch.
I look at him until he loosens his grip.
“What did I do?” he asks, lifting a brow.
“What did you do?” I repeat. My fingers curl into my palms as the frustration I have been holding back since we woke up from that nightmare finally pushes its way out. “You… kissed me. Again. And you continue to act as if none of it happened.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” he says dryly. “I thought you wouldn't appreciate me discussing our love life in front of the crew. But say the word, and I can gather them on deck to tell them in detail just how much I enjoyed kissing you.”
Oh. Heat rushes into my cheeks as if commanded, and I cross my arms in front of my chest as if that might hide it. We haven't been alone ever since waking up. The crew was always around. So that’s why.
“No?” he asks, a glint of amusement returning to his voice. “Thought so.”
“You could’ve given me a hint,” I murmur, my gaze drifting past him instead of meeting his eyes. I know I sound desperate, but I just can’t help myself. This man just does things to me, makes me feel emotions that I have never felt before.
“You’re right,” he says.
Before I can react, he leans down and presses a kiss to my cheek.
My pulse stumbles, and I tighten my arms across my chest. More heat rushes into my head.
“Here’s your hint,” he murmurs near my ear. “Now go and find the current, little fish.”
I do not wait for anything else and stride off towards the ladder, and suddenly, it feels like a deja vu. The only difference is that this time, Sable doesn’t come after me. He doesn't splash in next to me as I descend into the water. It feels less warm than it had in the dream.
The good thing is, I am not disappointed when I glance down at my legs.
I was not expecting them to magically turn into a tail.
Suddenly, something glistens in the sun.
A scale appears on my skin, and I pull in a sharp breath.
I follow them as more scales appear, one by one, all over my legs.
At the sight of them, I smile, and to my surprise, they look exactly as they did in the dream.
Iridescent, they shimmer in the water, as if they’ve always been there. Tears well in my eyes.
At least that part was actually true.
In utter awe, I stare at them for a while longer before remembering my mission to find the current. Within me, the siren stirs with excitement as I let my body glide through the shallow, silver waters. My legs kick and kick behind me, until I reach deeper water and I cannot see the sand any longer.
I draw in a deep breath just as the Noctis creaks. They’re lowering the yawl into the water, and even from far away, I can hear Sable shouting his orders to the crew. I can’t help but smile before I finally go under.
As I dive deeper, pressure begins to bloom in my ears, but I have learned to ignore it at this point in my life. Down here, the water is cooler, and still crystal clear. The light that trickles in from the surface makes it gleam in iridescent colors as I shift and continue my descent.
What doesn’t quite sit right with me is that the water lies completely calm. I don't have to fight any resistance in swimming downward. Maybe I’m looking in the wrong place.
I float in the depths and turn in all directions, trying to see anything out of the ordinary. My hair gets in the way multiple times, floating around me in strands that seem to catch the light and glow on their own.
In the distance, the dark hull of the Noctis looks out of place.
The water ripples where they let the little boat splash into the water, and I follow the movement with my eyes and see it disappear somewhere on the left.
I furrow my brows. It seems to have just vanished completely.
That’s strange. Normally, that wouldn’t happen, not unless there was a stronger current guiding the water into a different direction.
At this point, my lungs begin screaming for air, so I lock in the position and kick my legs until my head breaks the surface. With a heaving chest, I gasp for air and watch Grim row the little boat in my direction.
“Found anything?” he asks as he reaches me and offers me a hand.
I shake my head in answer and reach for his hand. “Not yet, but I have an idea where I might. Over there, on the left.”
Grim pulls me up, and I tumble into the boat clumsily, scratching my knees in the process.
“There’s nothing,” Grim says as he scans the area with a spyglass lifted to his eye.
“The surface is calm, but from beneath, it looks like there’s a current.”
He lowers the spyglass before folding it shut with a practiced motion.
“Let’s hope you’re right.”
Grim begins to row, the boat gliding through the water towards the place I pointed out.
For a moment, nothing changes. The sea lies smooth and indifferent beneath us, the hull barely meeting any resistance.
But the moment we reach the one stretch of sea in particular, the boat shudders.
The low pull beneath my ribs tells me that I was right.
The boat decides to move on its own now, dragging sideways instead of forward.
“Grim?” I turn my head towards him. The pirate is already adjusting his grip and lets out a sharp breath as he tries to maneuver the little boat.
Then it tilts, and I brace my palm against the bench to steady myself.
The water is pressing against the hull beneath us, no longer sleeping, but instead flowing steadily.
My pulse quickens. This must be the current.
It runs clean and strong beneath the surface, invisible unless you’re caught in it. And by the way the boat is pulled along with it despite Grim slowing his rowing, it must be a strong one.
I look back toward the Noctis, my chest tightening. If it can carry a boat like this, it will drag something as large as the Noctis with far more force.