43. Aria
43
ARIA
R ecovery is not going well.
I mean, physically, I’m making strides. My injuries are on their way to healing. I was allowed to come back home, Dr . Grant satisfied with my progress.
Mentally , though, I’m struggling.
I truly wish my brain would kick rocks. It’s like I’m trapped in a nightmare I can’t wake up from.
My body feels numb, and the only thing keeping me sane is the pain medication I’ve been abusing. It blurs reality, making it easier to cope.
For a little while, the ache is bearable.
I know I’ve made progress, but I still feel the need to take the edge off. I’m scared shitless to feel anything. The grief for my father’s death, mixed with my disgust for him. The worry that Andrew may do something awful if I don’t show up to the wedding, especially after finding out he tried to get Dion killed.
So , I take more pills, and for a moment, I don’t have to think.
I know this is dangerous, especially with my recent history of addiction. Every time I pop another tablet into my mouth, I’m haunted by the fear of falling back into old habits. It feels like I’m fighting a losing battle.
Like I’ve taken a step back in my recovery, and it’s frustrating. I want to stay strong, and I can’t live like this forever. Something has to give, and I don’t know if I’m strong enough to face what comes next.
Since my father died, I’ve had more of a reason to become a recluse.
My mother moves around the house like a hollow version of herself. Her eyes now dulled by sorrow and betrayal. I see it in the way she gazes into the distance sometimes, lost in memories that bring more pain than comfort.
My baba was a terrible man, and we never knew. How could we have been so blind?
I’ve never felt so disgusted in my entire life.
But the loss of my father doesn’t only haunt my mother.
I loved him something fierce. We were a tight-knit family—until he surprised me with the engagement news.
Now , I can’t un-know the darkness he carried with him. The lies he told, the secrets he kept hidden behind his ‘doting husband and father’ charade.
I thought I knew him.
I trusted him with my whole heart. But that heart has now been crushed, shattered into a million pieces I can’t put back together.
And Dimitri … I’m sure he’s hiding something from me. I see it in his eyes, the way he avoids my questions, the way he changes the subject whenever I ask him about the snippets of conversation I overheard while in the hospital. It’s driving me insane. What could be so terrible that he can’t tell me?
Speaking of the devil, there’s a knock on my closed door.
“ Hey !” Dimitri yells from the other side. “ Can I come in?”
I’m sitting at my vanity, staring at the new scar across my chest.
“ Yeah , sure.”
He pokes his head in. “ Are you decent?”
“ Of course, I’m fucking decent, you twat,” I retort, throwing a makeup brush at him.
He ducks to dodge it, laughing, and steps inside.
When he notices what I’ve been doing, he frowns. “ Riri , there’s no point in covering that up. Be proud. You’re officially badass. You’re like Scarface now.”
I chuckle. Even though Dimitri is now head of the Kastellanos family, he hasn’t lost his playfulness, and it makes me happy to still have a sliver of my baby brother, despite the demands of his new role.
“ Well , if you put it that way,” I say with a smirk.
It’s not that I necessarily think the scar is ugly.
I saved Angie’s life, and that’s something I’ll never regret. It just represents so much, everything that happened over the last couple years.
“ How are you holding up?” Dimitri asks.
“ Better than most in my situation, I guess,” I shrug.
He sits on the edge of my bed and taps the mattress for me to join him. When I do, he puts his arm around my shoulders, bringing me in for a hug.
“ You’re doing amazing, Ri ,” he says, pride shining in his eyes.
I wrap my arms around his waist and squeeze him back.
“ I wanted to talk to you about something,” he adds when I pull away. Maybe he’s finally decided to divulge the secret he’s been keeping from me.
“ Go on,” I say.
He takes a deep breath. “ So , while you were… asleep , I found out something really mind-blowing.” His eyes lock onto mine. A chill runs down my spine, but I nod for him to continue.
“ What is it ?” I almost shout when he doesn’t. My patience is very thin these days.
“ Before I tell you, promise you won’t get mad that we’ve kept this from you.”
My eyes widen. “ We ? Who’s “we,” Dimo ?”
He grimaces. “ Everyone .”
I gape at him, indignation rising within me.
“ Aria , you were in a fucking coma. We weren’t just going to tell you life-changing information as soon as you woke up.”
“ Well , you told me about Baba ,” I retort, the pain of his death still very present.
“ That’s not something we could’ve really kept hidden. Either way, he wanted to wait until you were better.”
“ He ?”
An exhale. “ Our half-brother.”
For a moment, I can’t process what Dimo said. The words echo in my mind, refusing to make sense. My heart flutters, a wave of confusion and disbelief washing over me. A half-brother? Without thinking, I jump off the bed, legs shaking.
“ What ? How ?” I manage to stammer, my voice higher than usual. My mind races, trying to piece together this new information.
I’d overheard Dimitri say something about a brother when I was still unconscious, but I would’ve never imagined that we had another sibling. What . The . Hell ?
“ I had the same reaction when I found out.”
This is fucking jarring.
“ His name is Atlas .”
“ Atlas ,” I repeat, letting his name linger on my tongue. The name sounds awfully familiar. But my memory has been hazy ever since I woke up from my coma.
“ He’s a few years older than you. Father’s first-born. Bastard .”
“ He had an affair on Mama ?” I ask, the word feeling foreign.
He nods. “ She didn’t know. He hid it well.”
I sink back down onto the edge of the bed. “ So , all this time, we had a brother, and Baba never told anyone?”
“ That’s correct,” he replies.
“ Does he know about us?” I ask, my voice faint.
“ Yes . He always knew but couldn’t contact us. He didn’t want to disrupt our lives. Though , now he’d like to meet you, to be a part of your life, if you’ll allow it.”
I sit in stunned silence, my mind whirling. How could our father cheat on our mother and never once mention another sibling? Where was he hiding him this whole time?
“ I don’t know what to say,” I admit, looking at Dimo with wide eyes.
“ Take your time,” Dimo rests his hand on my shoulder. “ It’s a lot to take in.”
“ How’s Mama ?”
“ She surprisingly took it better than I thought. She’s met him.”
“ Wow ,” I say, nodding slowly to steady my breathing. “ I think I want to meet him.”
A few days later, I’m pacing back and forth in my bedroom, the sound of my footsteps muffled by the carpet. My heart is racing, and I can’t seem to find a way to calm it down. I keep glancing at the clock on my nightstand.
I could’ve waited downstairs with Dimo or helped Magda in the kitchen, but they’ve all but kicked me out of the house because I was being too fidgety.
I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror as I pass by. My face looks tense, and I try to smooth out the worry lines on my forehead. I take a deep breath, though it doesn’t seem to help much.
I stop at my desk, my eyes landing on a picture of our father. I wonder if Atlas has the same eyes or the same smile as Baba . The anticipation is almost unbearable. I move to the window, looking out at the driveway, hoping to see a car pull up. Nothing yet.
My burner phone buzzes on the bed, and I jump, nerves on edge.
Dion: Good luck today.
I haven’t seen Dion since I came home from the hospital, but he’s messaged me every day since.
Though I miss him, we’ve been sticking to the deal we made to not see each other until I’m better and the entire ordeal with Andrew is over. If it ever does end …
I read the message a second time. I never told him I was meeting Atlas today. It must have been my brother.
Me: Are you and Dimo best friends now?
Dion: Something like that.
Dion: Send me an ootd pic.
I laugh out loud.
Me: Ew, Dion. Are we in 2017? If you want to know what I’m wearing, you can just ask.
Dion: Just send me a fucking picture, Aria.
Me: I’m rolling my eyes at you.
Dion: Remember what happened last time you did that?
Within an instant, my heart is hammering, a steady thrum. The memory of Dion spanking me while penetrating me deeply from behind runs wild in my head.
Warmth spreads through me, starting low in my belly.
Dion: Is my little liar speechless?
My fingers twitch, as if they have a mind of their own, and I bite my lip, trying to focus on my text.
Me: No…
Dion: Then tell me that you’re dying to have me inside you again.
I feel a flush rise to my cheeks and my breath quickens, becoming shallower and more rapid.
Holy hell.
The mere thought of his dick inside me still leaves me breathless.
But it’s not the time to fall for his charm. I’m meeting my brother in a short while. I don’t want to be an aroused mess.
Me: No.
Dion: I didn’t realize that was a question, Aria.
I can’t help but let out a soft sigh, the sound escaping before I even notice. There’s an ache growing inside me, and he’s not helping at all.
I give in.
Me: I miss having you inside me.
It’s true. I miss the way his touch sets my skin on fire, the way his presence envelops me in a cocoon of warmth. The memory of his fingers tracing patterns along my body sends a shiver down my spine.
He makes me feel alive .
Dion: That’s my good girl.
Fuck .
Unable to handle the temptation any longer, I throw my phone onto the bed, trying to shake off the memories and refocus on preparing to meet my brother. I take a deep breath.
I move back to the mirror, brushing my hair with deliberate strokes, hoping the mundane task will help ground me. Think of your grandma, Aria . Or sick puppies. Or hemorrhoids .
Just as I start to regain some composure, my phone vibrates again. The sound cuts through the quiet, making my heart skip a beat. I glance at the bed, my resolve wavering. Another text from Dion . I can almost feel his presence in the room, his voice echoing in my mind.
With trembling hands, I pick up the phone, my eyes scanning the message.
Dion: I’ll be seeing you tonight.
The words send a jolt of excitement through me, reigniting the flames I tried so hard to extinguish.
Then , confusion sets in.
How can we meet tonight? Our deal still stands. On top of that, my brother is coming over soon. I stare at the message.
I type back quickly.
Me: Dion, my brother is coming over tonight. We said we wouldn’t do this again…until I’m better and Andrew is out of the picture.
His response comes almost instantly.
Dion: I’ll find a way, Aria.
Just then, Magda knocks at my door. I put my phone away and quickly run my hands through my hair, trying to calm my desperate, aroused self.
“ Arioula , your brother is here.”