Zander
fifteen
“Fuck, what now?” I growl, pushing away the tablet Payton thrusts into my hands as soon as I walk out of the elevator. I read the headline and scan the article, noting quickly what is insinuated in bold font on a crisp website that most of Atlanta will read today and speculate about nonstop.
“Why the hell didn’t you tell us about this, Zand?
Is it true?” Payton asks, his long strides matching mine as I barrel down the hallway, looking for the privacy of my office to rage in.
That fucking blog needs to be scraped from the internet already.
We have the money and resources to do it, so why is it still up?
“Is what true? It’s a fucking gossip site that likes to make connections where there aren’t any,” I say, putting as much confidence in my voice as I can.
It’s a question I have resolutely decided not to care about as I fuck my way through my social DMs in an attempt to get back to the normal me.
A me I can’t fucking find when Harlowe insists on posting the thirstiest photos imaginable.
I should be immune to her and yet I’m stopped in my scrolling every fucking time by the expressions on her face, her glorious tits, whatever goddamn recipe she is showing off, and reading her words that sound like the filthiest of food porn that gets me hard and has me stroking my cock and coming in my hand like a horny teen.
I should block this account, too, which would be for the best. Yet I haven’t, because I’m a masochist using the flimsy pretense of following her to potentially find out about her kid for myself.
“Is it possible you have a child?” Payton’s voice is low, spoken only for me to hear knowing there are far too many eyes and ears trained on us as we move through the busy office space toward the executive office wing.
“We know you fucked her, went to the Maldives with her, spent way more time with her than you ever do. Could you have gotten this girl pregnant?”
He calls her a girl when she's the sexiest goddamn woman he would be lucky to even meet. I carefully keep my eyes ahead, not answering his question or meeting his inquisitive ocean blue gaze that is steadfast and fixed on me, looking for any signs of weakness he can exploit. I shove through my office door hoping he’ll be shaken off, but he follows through and nearly runs into me when I see Hayes has already made himself comfortable on the black leather sofa facing the door, his phone in hand.
“Is this why Harlowe was coming around the office after your trip? Maybe she was trying to tell you that she was left with more than sand in her panties from your trip?” Hayes asks, fire burning through his deep green stare as he holds up the phone, showing the same Haute List story.
My brothers and their demanding eyes are going to be the death of me today.
“Should I congratulate you on the birth of my nephew now, or after the paternity test?”
I stay silent while I move to my chair behind my desk, grasping for the smallest piece of control I can muster, even if it’s just the act of being at my desk and in a position that normally makes me feel powerful.
Payton closes the door and leans back against it, the tablet lit in his hand while he scrolls. “Gossip site or not, the Atlanta Haute List had correct information about the flight manifest when we know she accompanied you to the Maldives. So why don’t we know about this mistake?”
“I don’t make mistakes,” I growl, my head lowering slightly, ready for the challenge these assholes are no doubt going to throw at me.
The question sends me right back to the last conversation I had with Harlowe.
She said it was a mistake to get mixed up with me, and it fucking hurt.
If we did create a child from that trip, he’s no mistake.
I don’t care if it wasn’t the intention or something I ever considered.
If he’s my child, my son, he will never be a mistake.
“You made a mistake by not following up with one of your longest-running…” Payton pauses, glancing up quickly while searching for the right word to call my trip with Harlowe, “hookups, I guess. You just did your typical Zander move and cut off all contact with her and had absolutely no idea you may have had a bigger souvenir from that trip to paradise than a killer tan and a wet dick.”
“Oh, give him a break, Pay, the man doesn’t do repeats.
He just uses a woman for a day or a weekend, and we clean up the mess if they want to stay longer.
How many times have you or I shown up at his penthouse, NDA in hand, to find a disgruntled date that didn’t want to leave despite Zander’s clear instructions?
” Hayes says far too casually to match the hard set of his face.
“True, we’ve had our share of chasing off the clingers who didn’t get that Zand wouldn’t want to sleep with them again after their value, as something to conquer had been diminished when they opened their legs to him.
” Payton strolls away from the door and settles his long frame into a chair across from my desk.
“The biggest surprise here may be that he spent more than one night with a single woman, not that he may have a kid because of it.”
I could crack a tooth with the ferocity of my jaw clenching. They’re not wrong, but it feels far more irritating to hear them discuss my motivations and hookup history with such bluntness. It’s beginning to sound like I may have fucked up.
“What pisses me off the most is his fucking conquer the mountain mentality that sent him careening after his next conquest after creating a major liability. What do we know about the woman? She’s a former supermodel and she’s making a name for herself with a cookbook and YouTube channel, but is she going to shake him down?
How much money is she going to want, and why hasn’t she made her appearance before now, looking for it?
She didn’t sign an NDA, so what’s she waiting for?
” Hayes asks Payton, deliberately ignoring me.
“Shut the fuck up, both of you. She refuses to even say if this is my kid. There’s no way.” The slight catch to my voice at the end of the sentence gives away my lack of confidence in the words. I cross my arms and lean back in the chair, creating some distance from their accusations.
“There’s no way, or there’s a chance and you’re just an idiot for being sloppy?” Hayes probes, leaning his big arms on his knees and peering at me with an intensity that I want to punch away.
“Did you raw dog her the whole trip, or did a condom break? Did you forget, even once, to wrap it up? What are the chances here? Give us the truth because we need to know if there is even the slightest possibility you may have a child, whether or not you know about it,” Payton says, mirroring Hayes in his position and making me want to fly out of my chair under their scrutiny.
“We need the information if we’re going to get ahead of this and help you figure it out. ”
The softening of his voice is what finally buckles me, and I blow out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding and drop my arms to the desk.
“It was only once, and I didn't think anything of it. I don't forget things like that. It’s second nature to grab a condom, but we were in the shower and it just progressed faster than either of us realized. It was just the one time.”
Harlowe’s sun-kissed caramel skin had been glowing from our afternoon under the tropical sun, the scent of her coconut sunscreen thick in the shower enclosure when she stepped in after me.
Her body had molded against mine, her long, burnished brown sea salt waves falling down her back as the water washed over us both.
She’d said she missed me, and I knew I would never be the same because I had missed her too.
I slipped into her wet heat bare and made love to a woman for the first time in my life, knowing it would change me forever.
When we both came, I looked into her eyes and lost myself to her completely.
It was a dangerous game we both ended up losing, in the end.
“Zander, this is serious,” Hayes says, his voice bringing me back to the present.
The pungent fragrance of plumeria and coconuts is such a visceral memory, it feels like a punch to the face when my eyes refocus in my office.
I also realize I’ve become uncomfortably hard, my cock straining in my pants under the desk.
Fucking hell. From a single memory, Harlowe has me this twisted up.
She will be the death of me, if not my brothers, at this point.
“I’m quite aware of the seriousness of the situation.
I haven’t spoken to her in years. Until,” I pause, remembering her face and the small changes to her physique that only enhanced her allure when I saw her weeks ago on the side of the highway, and then the feel of her against me when I stopped by her house that week.
“Javi rear-ended her in traffic a couple of weeks ago. It was a total coincidence and the first time I’ve seen her since the Maldives trip, and she didn’t say anything about a kid to me. ” I don’t mention my late-night visit.
Payton drops his tablet into his lap and palms his face with an exasperated sigh.
“Did you talk about anything else besides the fender-bender that day? Did you happen to think maybe it’s no coincidence this story has leaked and they are making connections after so many years?
She could have leaked it herself as a way to put pressure on you. ”
“Or the Atlanta Haute List is just another stupid gossip blog intent on coming up with the juiciest clickbait story, regardless of the facts,” I retort, anger deepening my voice as my hands grip the desk until my knuckles whiten.