Chapter 11
Monday dawns a little cooler, a little cloudier, and a lot more baffling if Zodiac Girlie is to be trusted. I roll over to face Em, who, despite having her own bouncy hotel bed complete with pillow menu in her own bedroom, passed out in mine last night.
‘Morning!’ I say, seeing that she’s awake and thrusting my phone in her face. ‘Em? What’s Zodiac Girlie banging on about today?’
She reads the Stars in Brief.
Don’t set fire to yourself to keep warm .
‘Admit it,’ says Em, yawning. ‘You’re getting a little bit into this now, right?’
‘Well …’ I hedge. The whole star sign match with me and Luke is quite exciting, I must say.
‘I know this isn’t your thing, but I can see that you’re trying for my sake and I love you for it.’ Em beams. ‘So, okay, I think this means that you don’t always need to put other people first which is definitely a you trait, Jessie. It’s saying that you should spend some time looking after number one, do what feels right for you rather than prioritising everyone else.’
We both muse over this for a bit before Em adds: ‘Although, you know, don’t ditch Zodiac Girlie because she is so wise.’
‘So you’re saying I should do what feels right for me … with caveats?’ I point out.
‘Precisely.’ She laughs.
‘Does that mean I can spend all day in the library?’
‘Erm, I guess.’ Em looks underwhelmed by this plan. ‘Or, given that we’re only here for a week and the facilities are amazing, you could let me book you in for something this morning?’
She’s scrolling through the treatment menu on her phone when her eyes light up.
‘You’re right,’ I admit, stretching out my whole body under the covers. ‘It’s not every day we get to wake up in a place like this and I can take a book with me to the spa, anyway. But Em, you look like you’re plotting something.’
‘Who, me?’ Em grins, pure mischief across her face as she taps away on her phone. ‘Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it. All you need to do is meet me in the spa at 10am.’
‘Well, in the spirit of putting myself first I would like to say that I’m not doing anything dramatic,’ I say sternly. ‘No more cardio and ice bath combos.’
‘I mean, you didn’t even do that one so—’
‘And absolutely no colonics.’
‘They do colonics?’ Em asks, scrolling through her treatment menu with intrigue. ‘Sign me up.’
‘You’re so weird.’ I yawn. ‘And to be clear, I won’t do that.’
‘Okay, Meatloaf.’ She nods solemnly. ‘Listen, I get it. The only thing you want inside you is Luke’s massive penis.’
‘Emerald! For heaven’s sake,’ I almost yell, my eyes widening. And then I say, ‘Exactly how do we know it’s massive?’
‘Have you seen the height of him? The size of those trainers?’
And she starts laughing which makes me grin and then I’m laughing too, not about the size of Luke’s trainers or his, you know … other stuff, but because only Em would say something like that about a man that she’s also called my perfect match. And when I’m laughing, it sets her off even more and she looks delighted.
‘You are going to have a lot of fun,’ Em says, taking hold of my shoulders and looking me in the eyes. ‘Jessie, please try to have fun with that gorgeous man who is very tall with very large feet. You have noticed that, haven’t you?’
She’s smirking even though she’s trying to be serious and I am smirking although I am also feeling quite flustered by the way our conversation has panned out. I decide I need to change tack.
‘Please pick something nice for me?’ I say, nudging her phone, still open on the spa’s treatment list. ‘After all, today is my day for not, erm, setting fire to myself. Shall I just book it myself?’
‘Will you let me do something for you, please?’ Em says, quite firm. ‘And calm down. All I’m doing is booking us in for treatments.’
‘You’ve got a glint in your eye.’
‘It’s the sea air, babes,’ she replies dismissively, although I can’t help but feel like something is up. ‘Now, I’m off for an early morning forest bathe. See you later.’
At the spa, a central glass atrium welcomes guests with jugs of herb-sprigged water and an overwhelming sense of calm. From here, you can potter off to the stunning indoor pool, flanked with loungers, each one with its own perfectly rolled towel ready for you. Or follow the timber-clad corridor through to the treatment zone, where countless rooms offer all types of indulgence.
I wonder what Em’s arranged for us this morning. Maybe a neck massage? I read an article about our generation being blighted by ‘tech neck’ because we’re forever staring at our phones. Apparently a wrinkly and chronically sore neck is my destiny.
At least I have beautifully pedicured toes, I think, watching them catch the light as I pad through the spa in sliders, finding the girls in a sunken seating area in various stages of undress. Stella, in cycling shorts and matching bralet, has cucumber slices on her eyes and Em’s lounging around in a bikini with her hotel robe thrown over the top.
‘Don’t mind me,’ Stella says, motioning towards her face. ‘I explained to my masseuse that I’d been burning the candle and she suggested sliced cucumbers on my eyes before we begin my facial.’
‘Facial sounds good,’ I coo. ‘Is that what we’re all having?’
Em looks triumphant, like she’s up to something, and with Stella blinded by cucumbers she’s not even bothering to hide it.
I feel a rising sense of panic.
‘Actually, Jessie, you and I are trying the new couples massage,’ she announces, with a huge grin.
‘Oh! Well that sounds totally fine. Really fun, actually,’ I reply, relieved, until I notice that Em still looks like the cat that got the cream.
I narrow my eyes at her and she beams back, like butter wouldn’t melt.
Warily, I pour myself a water, deciding that hydration will be the best way to get through whatever it is she’s up to.
‘Stella?’ calls a masseuse in a linen tunic. ‘Whenever you’re ready.’
Stella peels the veggies from her face and leaps up.
‘Enjoy your couples massage, kids.’ She grins. ‘See you back at ours?’
As our friend disappears off into a low-lit room, I round on Emerald.
‘What are you up to?’
‘Shh, Jess, we’re meant to keep our voices down in the chill-out room.’
‘There’s literally no one else in here.’
‘I sense that you’re on edge.’
‘Because you’re up to no good, it’s written all over your face!’
Em pretends to look affronted. ‘I always have your best interests at heart, Jessica Jones.’ Then she looks over my shoulder and smiles. ‘Oh look, it’s Luke. Hi, Luke!’
I turn to see all six feet five inches of Luke walking in and my heart crashes against my chest.
‘Hey,’ he says. ‘Everything okay? Your message sounded kind of urgent.’
I scowl at my best friend. What message?
‘Thank you so much for coming.’ She presses her hands together. ‘Jess and I are meant to be having a couples massage together soon but I’ve just found out that a really important work call has been moved forward. This musician I’m working with is having a crisis about her world tour costumes. Apparently, Tina’s stylist has ordered some stuff and she’s worried it won’t work with the jewels we’ve been working on together.’ I narrow my eyes. This is a lot of information, some may say too much information. ‘And Tina waits for no man. So sorry, Jess, such terrible timing.’
Oh please. I fold my arms across my body as Em pulls various can-you-believe-it faces. Obviously Luke isn’t going to believe this cock-and-bull story.
‘I hate to leave poor Jessie stranded because she’s been so looking forward to this massage! And, I did check, the spa have no other massages available all day for her to take instead. So it really is now or never and I wondered, Luke, if you’d mind filling in my spot?’
My mouth drops open. I mean, I knew where she was going with this but somehow, the actual saying of it makes me even more gobsmacked.
Time slows right down as every tiny part of me cringes hard. Because obviously in a dream world where Luke isn’t Stella’s little brother and also definitely likes me, a couples massage would be ideal. But I live in the real world and therefore must insist that Luke doesn’t have to do this. All I need to do is find the words.
‘Honestly—’ I begin.
Right when Luke says, as cool as you like: ‘Sure, I’d love to.’
‘Are you sure?’ I ask, and it must come out a bit harsh because he looks taken aback.
‘If you’re okay with that, of course,’ Luke backtracks. ‘I wouldn’t want to impose. I’m sure they’ll let you do the massage alone.’
‘They won’t,’ Em says firmly. ‘I checked.’
‘You’ve been doing a lot of checking,’ I say suspiciously.
‘It pays to be thorough,’ says the most haphazard person I know and then Em takes my hand and squeezes it. ‘There needs to be two bodies so you can practise techniques on each other.’
Oh my god, what?!
My eyes widen and I feel myself squeezing her hand really hard. She does not stop smiling at me.
‘Erm …’ I manage.
‘And goodness knows you need this, Jessie. Those nodules.’ She shakes her head, as if she can see that my nodules are in a state. ‘And actually, Luke, with all the exercise you’re doing, this would no doubt be great for you too. Am I right?’
Luke shoots me a look, one eyebrow raised, like a challenge.
‘I, erm … Sure,’ I say eventually. ‘Unless you’re busy, Luke? You’re probably busy, right? I wouldn’t want to get you in trouble so early on in the new job.’
‘I’m free as a bird.’ Luke grins.
‘Perfect!’ Em pulls her hand from mine and claps, looking at us like we are little chicks about to fly the nest. ‘Right, well, I think I’m going to get myself an iced latte …’
‘I thought you had a meeting,’ I say.
‘Yes, yes, of course. I’d better go to my meeting!’ And she actually winks at me.
‘Our friendship is over,’ I whisper as she walks past.
‘You can thank me later,’ she whispers back, eyes sparkling.
Two massage beds are set up next to each other in the treatment room, with sheets folded down on top of them. Soft music plays and the lights are turned down low. It’s warm but not too hot, and there’s the intoxicating smell of essential oils in the air.
‘Hey, thanks,’ says Luke, walking alongside me as we’re shown in. The size difference between us is ridiculous. ‘For letting me join, I mean. Em’s right, my muscles are in bits and I haven’t tried out the treatments here yet.’
‘No problem,’ I waver, still on edge. ‘Thanks for coming to the rescue. You’re making a bit of a habit of that.’
Luke looks puzzled.
‘When you saved me from certain drowning?’
He laughs softly. ‘Ah, okay. It was me who put you in danger in the first place so I’m not sure that counts. I guess this is the least I could do.’
‘Welcome,’ says one of the masseuses as he hands us both PAPER UNDERWEAR to put on. ‘My name is Ric and this is Enya, we’ll be your massage guides today,’ he adds, gesturing to his colleague.
I stare dumbly at the paper undies in my hand.
‘We’ll give you both space to get changed and be back shortly. Please arrange yourselves on the beds when you’re ready,’ Enya says as the pair of them leave.
Dear god. I take a deep breath and tell myself to be cool. It’s fine. Just an almost-naked massage with Luke.
‘I think they’re assuming we’re a couple.’ Luke glances at me once we’re alone, a shy smile across his face.
‘I don’t know.’ I grin. ‘I’m always getting naked and putting on paper pants with my mates.’
Luke laughs, runs a hand through his hair.
‘Lucky mates,’ he says.
I was not expecting that and my stomach flips.
‘Looks like there’s a bathroom through there,’ I say, pointing, my voice a bit wobbly. Oh no, I have to get a grip. Nothing has even happened yet. We’re still in our clothes!
‘Do you wanna …’ Luke nods towards the bathroom. ‘Or I can? I mean, I assume you don’t want to get changed in here, unless—’
‘I’ll go!’ I say hurriedly, scurrying inside with the paper pants in hand. They rustle as I put them on and I wonder why they have to be quite so unattractive. How can a spa this luxe offer pants this basic? I bet Dita wouldn’t wear these. She’d probably insist on the finest silk underwear for her treatments, right? Especially if her treatment involved being barely dressed around an utter hunk.
I keep a towelling robe wrapped tightly around me when I emerge to find Luke in nothing but his paper pants looking like the inspiration behind Michelangelo’s David . It’s just a case of inhaling and exhaling, I remind myself when I realise I’ve stopped breathing.
‘Well, this isn’t awkward,’ I say.
Luke takes one of the sheets from the massage beds and holds it up.
‘Here, I can hold this in place between us while you get on the bed if you’d like? Promise I won’t look,’ he adds, biting a beautifully full lip.
‘’Kay, thanks,’ I say, dragging my eyes away from his lips.
It is going to be difficult getting a grip while I’m in this small room with him. Do I need to get a grip? Why do I need to get a grip? Oh, Stella, yes. Younger brother. Stella. Pact. Best friend. I exhale a very long breath, walk over to my table and untie my robe with him holding up the sheet between us. I chance a glance at Luke and note that, as promised, he’s looking determinedly away. So now I’m naked but for paper pants with an unwanted robe in my hand, which I need to dispose of while not straying far from the sheet and thus flashing Luke. Hmm. There’s a chair in the corner and, now basically naked, I bundle the robe into a ball and turn to fling it onto the chair.
Only, as I turn, I stumble over Luke’s foot and the next thing I know I’m falling towards him . His reaction is instant, reaching his arms around me just like when I nearly drowned that time. I’m folded into Luke’s arms, wrapped up in the sheet he’d still been holding when he went to catch me. My face is pressed against his chest. I can smell citrus on his skin. Hear his breath quickening.
The air around us grows heavy.
I track my gaze up to meet his and his eyes flash.
‘You okay?’ he asks gruffly, the beginnings of a smile playing at his lips.
Unable to catch myself in time, I say: ‘We must stop meeting like this.’
Am I flirting with him?!
‘I, for one, think that would be a great shame,’ he replies.
Wait, is he flirting with me ?!
‘Why’s that?’
‘Beautiful woman falls directly into my arms?’ His eyebrow has arched, grey eyes pinning me to the spot. ‘I don’t hate it.’
Somewhere, in the back of my mind, I wonder quite what is happening here. But in the moment, I step back, away from the sheet, to take a better look at him. To try and get a read on him.
I only remember that I’m mostly naked once I’ve completed the step.
Luke swallows, hard.
‘So!’ I say, briskly stepping forward once more. ‘Don’t mind me, just heading right back into your arms. Can’t be getting in trouble for being a flasher.’
‘I’m very much not complaining, either way.’ He looks down at me, eyes smouldering. ‘Jess, I—’
‘Oh, sorry, are we interrupting?’ asks Ric as he and Enya glide back in. ‘It happens sometimes. It’s an intimate setting and—’
‘No, no!’ I insist, fleetingly glancing back at Luke.
‘Well …’ he says, cocking his head to one side.
I scramble onto the bed, covering myself in the sheet and plunge my face directly into the hole so no one can see quite how flustered I am right now.