Chapter Nineteen
Cash
“WHY SO GLUM, SON?” MERCER shook me out of my thoughts. No one had ever called me son, and the affectionate name startled me. Not even my father had ever used the endearing term. To him, I was just a problem and a mouth to feed when there was money for food.
I looked up from the wood I was staining for the wedding arch the bride and groom were supposed to get married under in a few days’ time. It was a tradition in Sabrina’s family for the bride’s father to make the arch beneath which his daughter and son-in-law would become husband and wife.
Mercer needed to put the final touches on his handiwork and had asked for my help while all the women were getting waxed. I didn’t even want to know what that entailed. I should have been following Izan, but I couldn’t refuse when Mercer asked. So I had Ivy monitor Izan’s phone just in case any significant calls came in or he left the property, as it seemed important to Mercer that we spend this time together here in his workshop. Although my thoughts had been far from this moment. I couldn’t stop thinking about what Sabrina had said last night. She had me wondering if my entire life had been a lie, and it was disconcerting. Could I be more than I’d been led to believe I was? And even if I could, would Sabrina be part of my life? Could she forgive me?
“I just have a lot on my mind,” I responded, trying to avoid eye contact with Mercer. Something about the man made me feel uncomfortable in my own skin. Not because he was a bad person—it was the opposite; he was a good man, and I wasn’t.
“Care to talk about it?” Mercer laid his paintbrush across the open can of stain on the stool between us. His kind green eyes, much like Sabrina’s, had me wanting to say yes, even though it was foolish. What could I tell him? The truth was out of the question—at least most of it.
“I’m not good enough for your daughter, sir,” was all I could think to say. I felt like I needed to prepare them for my departure. The thought of Sabrina’s family hating me after how kind they had been to me didn’t sit well.
Mercer patted me on the back. “Son, of course you’re not. I wasn’t good enough for Callie either when we first met. I’m probably still not, but that’s part of the fun of marriage. It would be boring if she didn’t have something to complain about.” He winked.
I smiled, imagining from what I’d witnessed that Callie was a handful.
“Although Sabrina has never been much of a complainer,” Mercer added.
“No, she’s not,” I agreed. Even now, when she had every right to rail on me, she didn’t. Instead, she’d trusted me enough to let me watch over her last night. I’d loved listening to her gentle sighs as she soundly slept. A few times she had even whispered my name. I’d asked her what she’d dreamed about this morning after she woke, but she wouldn’t say. The blush on her cheeks revealed what she refused to admit—I’d had a starring role in her dreams. I wished I could make them come true, whatever they were.
“So what else is on your mind?” Mercer pulled up two stools in his immaculately clean shop. There was hardly even a speck of dust. When we walked in, I noticed the large flat-panel TV on the wall. I had a feeling he mainly came out here not to carve wood or build arches, but to escape.
I took the seat he offered and he sat close, but still gave me my space. It felt like he was offering me a man-to-man talk, a privilege I’d never had. The closest thing I’d ever had to it was when one of my foster dads sat me down and told me I’d better not get any girl pregnant while I was living under his roof, and then handed me a box of condoms. After that, he ignored me unless he was barking at me to mow the lawn or clean out his garage.
Mercer waited patiently for me to speak, an inviting smile on his face.
I honestly didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t exactly a touchy-feely kind of guy. The only thought that came to mind was, “Sabrina and I come from different worlds. Worlds that probably shouldn’t collide.” I have no idea why I was being so honest with the man. No doubt he found the situation odd, considering Sabrina and I had just supposedly reconciled.
“Been there.” Mercer patted his knee. “Callie’s parents were none too happy when I rolled into Charming Cove.”
“Why is that?” I asked, more comfortable talking about him than myself.
“I don’t know how much Sabrina has told you, but I was just out of a bad marriage and much older than Callie, who at the time was twenty years old. She was small town and I was big city. Her parents hated me, especially her father, who pointed his shotgun at me a few times. Not only did he disapprove of me dating his daughter, but he thought I was going to ruin Charming Cove by bringing in the resort. I broke up with Callie a few times over it all, feeling like the challenges were too big to overcome. But thankfully she’s a stubborn one and she wouldn’t have it. To her, love can conquer all, even if most of this town believed that she married me for my money. She refused to listen to the naysayers. We both knew the truth.”
“And what was that?”
“That what we had was real. Just like I believe what you and Sabrina have is real.” Mercer dipped his chin to his chest and gave me a knowing look.
“How can you know that? You barely know me,” I questioned.
“This is true, but I know my Sabrina, and unlike her sister, she wants real life. That includes the good, the bad, and the ugly of it all. She’s smart enough to know life isn’t a fairy tale.”
That might be true, but Sabrina had no idea about some of the bad and ugly things I’d had to do. She might change her tune about not wanting a fairy tale if she knew. But the most interesting part of what Mercer said wasn’t about Sabrina. “You don’t think what Lexi and Soren have is real?” I was curious to know.
“I think they both believe it is, but I don’t think so. I have a feeling that reality will come calling for both of them, and they’re not going to like it.”
“And yet you’re letting Lexi getting married.”
“Son, it’s not up to me. She’s a grown woman and can make up her own mind. Not that she would listen to me anyway. Besides, I learned a long time ago it’s best not to get in the way of a Belle woman. And sometimes the lessons we need to learn the most come in the hardest ways possible.”
“You think her marriage to Soren will teach her a lesson?”
“Time will tell. Either way, I’ll be here to wipe away the tears when she needs me to.”
Interesting. He obviously didn’t think Izan was the right man for his daughter, yet he was going to let her go through with it. In some ways, it was admirable what he was doing, even though he had no idea the kind of man Izan was. I was sure that if he did, there was no way he’d let Lexi anywhere near him.
“Will I be wiping away Sabrina’s tears soon?” Mercer asked, point-blank.
I swallowed hard. The man pulled no punches. “The last thing I want to do is make Sabrina cry.” I already knew I had, and it killed me.
“But you fear she’s in for some tears?” Mercer pressed.
I shifted on the stool that was getting more and more uncomfortable. “Unfortunately, yes. I don’t have any idea how to be what she needs and wants me to be. I don’t even know where to begin. My father and mother ran off a long time ago and no one cared enough to take their place. My job is my life.” I had no idea what possessed me to say those things to Sabrina’s father.
“Hmm,” Mercer said while eyeing me carefully. “It’s an awful shame about your parents. A child’s first teachers are his mother and father. Most of the time, I would say parents teach you what to do, but in your case, they taught you what not to do. That’s still a valuable lesson.”
“What are you saying?” I realized that while I may know how to disarm a dozen different bombs and speak over twenty languages, when it came to emotional intelligence, my IQ was low.
“I’m saying you know the wrong things to do, so don’t do them.” He patted my knee. “Best get back to work.”
While I contemplated his words, I stared at the intricately carved arch and asked, “Who taught you about woodworking?”
“My father-in-law,” he said with a grin.
I cocked my head. “I thought he didn’t like you.”
“It took some years, but he came around. He recognized that I needed a father to teach me the right things to do,” he said with a twinkle in his eyes.
“You didn’t have a father?”
“Had one, and like you, he taught me all the wrong things to do. He was a liar and a cheat and broke my mother’s and my heart.”
“I’m sorry.” I didn’t know what else to say.
“Don’t be. I got a unique perspective in life, and I would like to think it helped me not to repeat his mistakes. Not to say I haven’t made some of my own.” He stood and stretched his back.
I stood and picked my brush up, ready to get back to work.
Mercer sidled up next to me. “You know, if you ever want to learn about woodworking , I’d be happy to teach you.”
Why did I feel what he was really offering was to teach me how to be the man his daughter needed? Or perhaps to be the father figure I needed. Stunned by his offer, I didn’t know what to say. No one had ever volunteered for that job before.
“Think about it,” Mercer added.
I wanted to, but I was still haunted by Ivy’s reminder that the only happy ending for me was catching the criminal. Spies didn’t get to keep the girl. But what if Sabrina was right? There was more to life than being a spy. I’d never stopped to think that was a possibility—being a spy was all I knew. But what if Sabrina was wrong? What if I wasn’t meant to love or be loved? That, more than anything, scared the hell out of me.