Chapter 37 #3
In an attempt to break the tension, I declare, “no drugs. I promise.” I’m met with silence. I know full well that I didn’t listen to his earlier request.
The same “tsk tsk” sound echoes within the close quarters.
I’m a mere ragdoll, exposed and positioned just how he wants me.
I’m unsure what he’s doing, but I think the faucet is running?
A second later, something smooth presses on my clenched hole.
I didn’t have to see it to know exactly what it is.
Between my legs, I look on as he crouches just behind me. He moves to feather a kiss on one ass cheek, right as he gradually slides the moist, cool plug inside me.
No longer can I keep the sound in. An unexpected moan tumbles out of me. If this is an attempt to punish me, I will only be disobedient from here on out.
Warm lips press against my other cheek once the plug is fully seated just inside me.
Slowly, he pulls up my panties and then the bottoms. Like I’m the puppet and he the master, he spins me around only to button the front of my tweed trousers. This man has bent me to his will time and time again; however, each new encounter has been overlapped with extreme devotion.
My body aches for him, but all I do is stare as he stands to his full height and rolls his shoulders back.
Strands of streaked, ash blond hair fall partially into his eyes, as he tilts his head and leans toward me.
Dax lines my neck with soft kisses, then pulls back and considers me.
Those slate eyes cause my knees to feel weak and I wonder if I behold them long enough, if I can glimpse into his very soul.
His lips part slightly and the air feels charged.
Lust fills the modest room, in spite of everything that has transpired.
My mind and heart battle yet, I have to remind myself that everything is so new.
Too many uncertainties. I’m positive more secrets are waiting just around the corner.
“I found something,” I let out, cutting through the thick sexual aura that engulfs us. My fingers dive into my miniscule pocket, retrieving the SD card, putting it into his now outstretched hand.
He observes the foreign item in his hand, then looks back to me, as if urging me to continue.
“Thelma died.”
His brows scrunch together and dammit his beautifully pitiful expression, better not make me start crying.
Taking a deep breath, I press on. “Everything that I love seems to die. I should have checked on her sooner, especially when I noticed she wasn’t coming out of her hide anymore.”
Deep lines mar his forehead, ahead of a staunch frown.
Don’t cry. I point to the card in his hand. “It was within the pieces of her hide. I… I smashed the skull hide. I don’t know how to see what’s on it.”
He nods thoughtfully.
“Do you think it’s from Theo?”
He hands it back to me.
Immediately, I push it back within my front pocket for safe keeping.
With his hands free, he signs: Be careful around Eamon. I’ve seen what he can do.
Of course, he would know Eamon better than me, but I believe that he’d never hurt me either.
Him and my brother seemed to have something real.
They were special to one another. I don’t think I’ve ever left a toothbrush at a partner’s place, but my brother had a serious enough relationship to keep twin tarantulas with someone.
Theo was always better at everything, even dating apparently.
“Okay. I will,” I conceded.
Dax exits the women’s bathroom first and I follow a few moments later. With so many unknowns, it felt kind of liberating to have my own secrets for once. My only wish is that one of them doesn’t cause me to become aroused, as I labor through this night.
Dax takes up residence in a far corner of the bar, positioned so he can watch me.
Has he always monitored me so openly or have I never realized it until now?
What if someone notices? Like Eamon… would he be upset?
Happy for us? Fuck me. Everything was so vague, but also so real…
intense. His relentless observation causes me to feel unease, teetering between both desire and modesty.
Whatever this thing is between us, I don’t want it to stop.
As I pour the shaken liquid into its glass, I can’t help but wonder how long we’re supposed to keep up this charade.
Pretending that we aren’t anything more.
Like many parents, my mom explained that there’s a difference between good and bad secrets.
Good secrets are the kind you keep to yourself for a little while, then eventually share, like a surprise party or a present.
Bad secrets are when you keep the information to yourself forever.
Funny how they were the ones who kept the biggest secret from me.
Did they ever plan to tell me? Did Theo know?
What category did this situation fall into?
Was being with Dax a good secret or a bad one… ?
My internal unrest comes to a screeching halt as my gaze snags on Jada's suggestive position, all but leaning over Eamon at the end of the bar. I don’t know why I feel more slighted by her pursuit of him than anything thus far, but I have an overwhelming urge to smother her.
Truthfully, I don’t even feel remorseful for thinking this way…
I do reign from a Mafia family after all.
Heedlessly, I march over to separate the delusional girl from the counter.
The poor thing wouldn’t accept rejection, even if it was court ordered and delivered in a manila envelope.
“Jada, we need more vodka and rum behind the bar. I need you to pull them from the backroom.” I flutter my lashes because our boss is present after all.
She smacks her gum, ample cleavage on full display as she remains unmoved against the countertop.
Eamon visibly relaxes, almost as if he was waiting for someone to intervene.
“I’ll get to it later, boss lady.” She stretches and pops the gum while continuing to make bedroom eyes at Eamon.
He’s still on his computer, however his brief side glance and lifted brow goads me.
“Now, Jada!”
I could have done without the eye roll, but she heeds my request.
“Fine.” She groans. At a snail's pace, she makes her way to the backroom. Limping of course.
Finally, a moment to speak with Eamon. I pull the picture from my pocket, carefully unfolding it to show him. Without looking up from the screen, he lectures, “You're not very good at following directions, are you?”
Likely referring to the fact I came into work tonight, despite him telling me to stay home. My mouth pulls to one side, but I remain fixed in place, photo extended out to him.
Inevitably, he peers at the photograph. “Wow. Where’d you find that relic?” He takes the image within his hand. First looking delighted then gradually morphing into a sort of pained expression.
“I found it in some of my family's memory boxes. Not sure where it came from. It was a mess of childhood items from Theo and I… but I couldn’t recall ever seeing that photo before today.”
He makes an mhm sound, clearly transfixed on the worn memento. “I don’t remember this day, but I have a subtle recollection of our families getting along.”
That makes sense. He’s older than me, maybe five or six in this picture, so he must have memories as far back as when the Lombardis and Murrays got along. “I was young, but I’m certain I overheard something that wasn’t meant for my ears.”
I know I shouldn’t get overexcited, especially over long-lost memories, but I was hanging onto each word like it was a lifeline.
“Off and on… things jog my memory, like a scent or even a photograph. I swear I retained more from childhood than I ever did as an adult. Some things are better left forgotten. My mother was a saint. Always putting us first, ensuring we had everything we needed including friends to play with. I remember you. Just a little older than my own sister. I also remember Theo. Just snippets, but they were definitely real. One night, when I was supposed to be sleeping, I woke up to the sound of my father yelling. Even from the top of the stairs, his voice carried up to me. He was mad about the police raids. He even suspected another group was trying to sabotage his livelihood.” Eamon stops briefly; eyes scanning the room.
He continues, “shortly after that, things changed drastically. No more playdates. We didn’t leave our side of town much.
Ingrained in my memory was the day of your accident.
When I first heard about it, I thought I lost you both.
It doesn’t make it any less significant, because you were still hurt.
You were too young to get caught up in our parents' world. Too innocent to understand everything that was evolving around you. Your family all but vanished overnight.”
I feel my lungs burn for air just as I realize I’ve been holding in a breath the entire time he’s been speaking.
“My mother cried for weeks. She mourned the loss of our family’s friendship and the future we were meant to have. My father threw himself into work. While, the Lombardis just faded away, after they nearly lost their daughter.” Eamon leans in closer to me, speaking just above a whisper.
Jada emerges from the back, with an exaggerated hitch and two bottles of liquor.
She sets the bottles on the counter, all the while she pins me with a look of pure discontent.
Oh, for fuck’s sake, I will Old Yeller this hoe if she interrupts!
Lucky for her, she proceeds to hobble her way back through the swinging door to recoup more bottles.