Epilogue #3
I didn’t have much time left. Raising off the ruined fuzzy ducks and christened teddy bears, I pull a remote from my pants pocket and hit play. Cindel’s eyebrow raises as she too sits up. Music pours through the candy store’s sound system.
Her face beams when she realizes, “Maps” by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, was resonating through the entire shop. She moves to kneel before me, taking my sodden face into her still bound hands. She whispers, “You figured out my favorite song.”
I produce a key for the cuffs from a metal ring on my belt, freeing Cindel to pull up her bottoms. Standing before our temporary haven, her body sways, moving liberally as I watch her dance about the room.
I don’t correct her. I’ve always known her favorite song.
She listened to it on repeat when she was younger.
Belting out lyrics while leaping on the bed.
I’ve always been watching… she just didn’t know it at the time.
This song was saved for today. As the music carries her away, she turns from me, positioned right between the sugar fill station and the wall of jelly beans.
So distracted, she doesn’t notice when I move to a clearing and take a knee.
When she twirls around, her eyes lock onto mine.
Long moments pass as I fight the urge to move from this vulnerable state, unsure what she’s thinking.
Have I progressed things too quickly? Is this not what she wanted?
From this distance, I notice a slight tremor in her hands.
She steps closer… closing the gap between us, agonizingly slow.
Reaching for her, I can only hope that she doesn’t discard me like everyone else in my life had.
Taking her hand in mine, I attempt to steel my nerves, unsure who’s more fragile at this moment.
The soft musical outro matches the juncture in which I push myself to speak.
“Cindel…” I say, before closing my eyes.
“You’ve been my beacon of light, when I’ve faced nothing but dark waters.
” My throat feels tight, making it even harder to form words.
“I’ve barely been treading water, most of my life.
So lost, I couldn’t make sense of up from down.
When you walked through that bar door, I knew you were capable of guiding my ship to shore or sinking the vessel upon unforgiving waves.
I will undoubtedly accept any fate you bestow upon me.
Even if I drown, I would still love you from the bottom of the ocean. ”
Tears begin to spill over her eyelids, peppering her cheeks with emotions I can only assume are in my favor.
Decisively, I continue with what I’ve been waiting a lifetime to ask. “Will you stay… swim by my side for the rest of our days?”
Cindel looks up and blinks rapidly, appearing to fight back the fresh surge of tears forming. Her mouth becomes tight however her bottom lip quivers. At some point her gaze shifts from the ceiling, back down to me. She shakes her head, no.
My eyes lower to the floor, unable to show her how much this kills me.
I feel as though my heart is emulsifying; veiled beneath rejection, just like so many times before.
It's likely something I said… I’m terrible with words.
That’s why I let my playlist do the talking for me.
Cindel’s boots shuffle closer to me. I almost wish this checkered ground would swallow me whole.
She lowers herself onto her knees, lifting my chin, insisting I consider her. What a sight I must be… the bird comforting the beast for exercising its freedom. Her small hands rest on either side of my cheeks, leveling me with a look of discontent.
“You beautiful, ridiculous man… give me a moment to speak.” Her lip no longer trembles, instead her resolute glare keeps me pinned in place.
“From the first song you played for me, I was ensnared within your game. What I didn’t anticipate was how much I wanted to be pursued.
As time went on and I learned more about my past, somewhere along the way… things changed. I changed.”
My head feels like it’s trapped in a vise, slowly increasing pressure.
Not wanting her to see me like this, I attempt to look past her.
Cindel must notice my diverted stare as she pulls me closer, trying to refocus my attention.
“Despite everything, the one constant that kept me waking up each morning was you. You’ve helped me in ways you couldn’t possibly imagine. ”
My neck throbs from the sheer force in my skull. I’m having trouble taking a full breath.
“You should know…” she lets go of my chin and eases back on her heels. “I can’t swim.” What…? Wait. Is that why she said no?
In a flash, I wrap my arms around her. Pulling her into me and squeezing tightly.
I didn’t want to let her go, for fear that all of this could possibly be a dream.
I push up from my knee, taking her with me.
Her legs wrap around my waist. My mouth devours hers.
Cindel is the very air I breathe. I wouldn’t be able to go on without her.
Before long the fervent kissing transitions to a soft embrace.
I dry any traces of salted tears upon her cheeks.
Her adorable giggle rings out as I skim down to the nape of her neck, landing on her freckle.
I pull back to take in her raw features.
Blotches of rosy hues glitter her skin, smeared makeup, and puffy-bruised lips. Fucking perfection.
“You know what this means?” I hint.
Her head vaguely tilts.
“We get to practice water sports more, now.”
Her eyes narrow before she removes a hand from the back of my neck, taking a finger into her mouth and slowly drawing it out. Next thing I know, she is jamming that same finger into the canal of my ear.
“Ah! Why?! Violation…”
Cindel throws her head back and laughs. “Oh okay… so, I can squirt all over your face, but a wet willy draws the line?”
The lights abruptly blink on and we find ourselves no longer alone in Sugar Drop. Time’s up.
Just as I set Cindel down, my brother, sister, Connor, and even Andrea invade our once intimate space. Shouts of “Congratulations!” and “I’m so happy for you two!” fill the space.
However, as soon as they reach the area we occupy, the comments quickly morph into, “What the fuck?!” followed by, “Dear god!” Cindel’s sparse patches of pink became a more uniformed shade of red, much like the gummy bear statue near the front of the store.
I honestly couldn’t discern if her new wave tears are from happiness or horror.
“Man… if Theo were here, he’d kick your ass!
” Eamon announces, before turning right the fuck around and exiting the building with a clearly amused Connor at his side.
Andrea simply stares at the lollipop still protruding out of the wooden barrel, then looks to Cindel, finally landing on my luster face.
Promptly, she excuses herself to the little girl’s room.
Mairead however sticks around, grabbing a tootsie roll from the drum of candy, unwrapping the chocolate treat meticulously, and popping it into her mouth.
She holds out a hand to Cindel. “Well… let’s see it!” Mairead demands. Cindel looks from me to Mairead. The spirited redhead proceeds to pick up a fist full of tiny rolls and starts throwing them at me. “You didn’t get her a ring?!”
I hold up my hands, trying to block the onslaught of chocolate chews, pelting me in the face with incredible accuracy.
“Woah! Ow! Woah! There’s a ring! There’s a ring!” I try to speak as loudly as possible.
Dropping the remaining ammo, she proceeds to put her hands on her hips, in a WELL kind of stance. “It’s just… indisposed at the moment.” I admit.
Cindel’s hands pop up, covering an audible gasp. Mairead hops in place while clapping her hands loudly together. “You. Two. Are. So. Fun. Together! I need to tell Andrea about this!” Mairead all but runs toward the restroom, leaving Cindel and I alone once again.
“Are you seriously implying… that there is an engagement ring in my…” I reach out, squeezing her butt cheek, causing her to squeal and swat my hand away.
“Not implying. Your engagement ring is unequivocally in your ass.”
Her mouth falls open and I can’t help but imagine what else I plan to put in there, once we get home. “Ah, one more thing…you can only remove your trinket, after I feed you and show you the 2009 film, The Proposal, starring Ryan Renyolds and Sandra Bullock. Andrea’s rule.”
Before she has the chance to object to anything, I sweep her off her feet, scoop her in my arms, and carry her out the back door.
I am anxious to get back and show her the ring.
I set her on her feet; her smell is intoxicating.
Before I can open the car door, I pin her against the side of my Camaro, delivering a punishing kiss.
It was unshakable, a promise passed from lips to lips. Mine.
Just then, the alley door screeches, stealing our attention. Andrea and Mairead pop out into the night, hand in hand, stopping just before us. Cindel is the first to speak.
“Really?... a Sandra Bullock movie?”
Andrea’s eyes narrow. The corner of her mouth turns slightly upward. “Sandra should always be included in important milestones! Even if we aren’t living under the same roof anymore.”
Cindel’s lengthy breath forms a cloud from the plummeting temperature. At that she holds out her arms to wish the two farewell. Mairead falls into her open arms, with giggles and squeaks, but Andrea however stays in place.
“Raincheck on the hug. I’ll get you next time you’re… washed.” Cindel sticks out her tongue at her stubborn friend, just ahead of climbing inside the car. I round the vehicle, as Mairead and Andrea walk in the opposite direction toward the street.
“You’re no Keanu—” Andrea calls out to me. “But you're not so bad either.” I turn to find her walking backward down the alley, my sister skipping beside her in the dirty, week-old snow. “If you hurt her though… there'll be nowhere you can hide.”