Chapter 38
Kjell
I glance once more at the antique clock above the fireplace in the Blohm villa's living room.
Twenty minutes to nine.
Where is she?
What I have to do today already weighs heavily on my chest. But now, on top of the fear of her reaction, comes the worry for Sky.
What if a reporter intercepted her on her way home? What if camera crews got wind of her presence and stationed themselves outside the Touch av lyx headquarters?
I pull my phone out of my pocket and dial her number.
No ringing. Just voicemail.
"Where are you, Sky?" I speak after the beep. "I'm going out of my mind with worry for you. Please tell me you're okay. Or how I can help you. What you need or..."
The recording ends with a click.
I run my hands through my hair. Something's not right. She wouldn't keep me waiting for so long without a sign of life.
Never!
I cross the living room quickly, heading to the hallway to put on my jacket and shoes. Then I fling open the front door—and freeze in the middle of the motion.
Sky.
With an aloof expression, she stands right at the threshold. Her lips are tinted blue, her cheeks sunken.
Shocked by the sight, I approach her. "Hej," I say gently and attempt to hug her, but she immediately steps aside. "What's wrong?"
For a while, she just stares at me, as if considering how she could hurt me most painfully.
"What's wrong, you want to know?" She finally asks, her tone so cold that the Swedish winter wind feels like a mild breeze in comparison. "You already know, don't you?"
I shake my head and try to hug her once more.
"Don't you dare touch me," she hisses in anger.
"Okay," I reply with growing unease and put some distance between us. "At least let's go inside."
Even though her lower lip trembles and her curls are covered in a layer of frost, she doesn't move. "I'm not going anywhere with you."
So her mood has something to do with me.
Has she found out? Oh man, please no. Not now. Not like this. A wave of panic washes over me, stealing my breath.
"Leave from here." She fixes me with her gaze. Her look is just as contemptuous as it was back in Polarnatt.
You worthless piece of shit , she said.
She knows, somehow she knows. "Let me explain—"
"I don't give a damn about your lies," she interrupts me. "Disappear. I never want to see you again."
No, she can't just send me away. Not before giving me a chance to set things right. Panicking with fear, I reach for her arms. This is too important; I have to fight for it. "Listen to me, Sky. Please."
She forcefully pushes my hands away. "Why? So you can continue manipulating me?" She glares at me with anger. "I'm not the naive little Sky from before." Her voice wavers dangerously. "And you're a nobody, a conniving asshole who would stop at nothing."
Swallowing hard, I release her. The way she looks down on me, the arrogantly raised chin, the finality in her tone.
There she is again, the Sky from before.
And it hurts more than I could have ever imagined in my worst nightmares.
"Who are you?" I murmur, frozen in the face of a brand-new truth forming within me.
Yes, I made a mistake, a damn terrible mistake. I don't even know exactly when because it took me a while to realize what I was getting myself into. But she doesn't even give me a chance to explain. It's as if she doesn't care about what we once shared.
As if she doesn't care about me and what I've tried to achieve for her.
"Mr. Muckraker would probably like to know," she continues. "Where are you planning to publish the story? In S anningens ?gonblick ? Or in Ryktesspegeln ?"
I freeze.
She knows about Ryktesspegeln too?
Sky pushes past me toward the entrance, stopping with a trembling back. "Snoop around a bit. That's what you do best, after all. Then you'll find the answer and can dissect it to your heart's content."
I bite my lower lip because any words forming inside me right now would only make the situation worse.
Suddenly, she whirls around. "My lawyers will send you a nondisclosure agreement tomorrow, and you will sign it. Is that clear?" She scolds me with a threatening tone.
She would think I'm capable of publishing her story without her permission?
Is she out of her mind?
I stare at her in disbelief, the same face that was so beautiful yesterday, now nothing more than a condescending grimace.
Until this moment, she has meant the world to me. I've not only risked the future of Sanningens ?gonblick but also my friendship with Jakob to protect her.
"Do you really think I would publish a single word without your consent?" My chest contorts with pain. If that's really the case, then nothing between us was ever genuine.
"I don't know you, Kjell Mattson," she says with pure hatred in her eyes. "All I know is that you're an even shittier liar than your parents ever were."
Incredible how precisely she digs into my wound without batting an eyelash.
Over the past few months, I've made some mistakes. But my biggest mistake was believing that she was different from the person I met back in Polarnatt .
"So this is your true face," I say, deeply wounded by the hatred she just hurled at me and the way she denies me any chance to at least explain my mistake.
"Disappear," she shouts with a shrill voice. "I never want to see you again."
At least we agree on that point. Without another word, I turn around. I walk along the paved path toward the gate, feeling her piercing gaze on my back.
Her phone rings.
"Hej, June," she says composedly.
I keep walking. Farther and farther toward the exit, until I reach the gate. As I place my hand on the handle, I hear Sky softly sob.
The sound sends shivers down my spine even though it shouldn't affect me anymore. With all my strength, I suppress what my foolish heart would like to do.
I won't go back. I won't comfort her. She is just as much not who she pretended to be as I am.
That's the only thought I allow myself to have. Because I can't bear anything else.
Hastily, I push down the handle of the wrought-iron gate and slip out onto the street.